What's your greatest sexual accomplishment?

[MDC 5,890]

Spermoff.

[DankNuggs 305]

I denied a 3 some back in the day, with the stupid rationale that eating a fine steak was better than gorging on an old country buffet.... Looking back I should have cannonballed that old country buffet... WGAF...

[Patriotsfatboy1 1,432]

The old standby of "Your Mom" is not really applicable because there have been so many who have been there.

[MDC 5,890]

The old standby of "Your Mom" is not really applicable because there have been so many who have been there.

You could've mixed it up, like saying "I successfully climbed Mt. Your Mom" or something.

[KSB2424 3,083]

I once shattered the 6 minute mark. Completely clean too, no drugs or alcohol.

[NewbieJr 540]

I came first fifteen straight years with the ex.

[NorthernVike 2,080]

Banged two different chicks within an hour of each other. Neither of them ever knew.

[Bishop82 61]

A threesome with two below average lesbians, just to say that I had a threesome.

[KSB2424 3,083]

Banged two different chicks within an hour of each other.

 

I've been on the opposite end of that.

 

After a drunken booty call this whooore rolls over and actually brags to me "You're the second guy I've been with tonight".

[KSB2424 3,083]

Something much more difficult than I imagined. Jizzing in a cup. After my vasectomy they made you ejaculate in a little cup to take it to the lab and test that you had no swimmers. Well, not to go into TOO many details but its much harder than peeing in a cup for several reasons.

 

I think I looked like Muhammad Ali throwing darts but I made it in there, quite an accomplishment if you ask me.

[edjr 5,562]

 

I've been on the opposite end of that.

 

After a drunken booty call this whooore rolls over and actually brags to me "You're the second guy I've been with tonight".

 

what flavor ice cream did the other dude taste like?

[KSB2424 3,083]

 

what flavor ice cream did the other dude taste like?

 

Bunny Tracks

[Patriotsfatboy1 1,432]

Something much more difficult than I imagined. Jizzing in a cup. After my vasectomy they made you ejaculate in a little cup to take it to the lab and test that you had no swimmers. Well, not to go into TOO many details but its much harder than peeing in a cup for several reasons.

 

I think I looked like Muhammad Ali throwing darts but I made it in there, quite an accomplishment if you ask me.

I had to do that too, but also had to whack it at the fertility clinic a few times. I brought my own porn instead of using the magazines that they had there. I don't have experience, but my thinking is that it would have been like those peep show places with sticky floors and you should never touch anything.

[BunnysBastatrds 1,914]

I fawked a fat chick, chubby chick, and skinny all in the same day. Guess which one won my secret contest?

[edjr 5,562]

8 inches

[SUXBNME 1,328]

2 kats 1 cup

[titans&bucs&bearsohmy! 2,745]

I denied a 3 some back in the day, with the stupid rationale that eating a fine steak was better than gorging on an old country buffet.... Looking back I should have cannonballed that old country buffet... WGAF...

I too declined a three way, and it haunts me. I had a bi curious fiancé, and a hot bisexual roommate. Bothe were game, I said no, we were getting married, it would hurt the relationship, Yadda Yadda.

 

Fast forward two years, we broke up anyway, and I've never had a threesome fourteen years later, and likely never will.

 

If time travel is ever invented, I'm kicking twenty year old me's ass.

[Frank M 181]

I pulled a 35 year old, very attractive African American girl's number (38DD) at a cafeteria where I was working for the summer when I was 19 or 20, and went over to her place and hit it later that night. And it was focking awesome.

 

I was dating a girl at the time, so I never went back. I'm still kicking myself for that 28 years later.

[edjr 5,562]

I'd imagine there is nothing awesome about banging a darkie

[Frank M 181]

I'd imagine there is nothing awesome about banging a darkie

 

Actually, it was one of the best ever. She was extremely hot.

 

[jerryskids 5,194]

 

Actually, it was one of the best ever. She was extremely hot.

 

38DD is not hot, it is fat. But hey, sometimes fatties try harder.

[Frank M 181]

38DD is not hot, it is fat. But hey, sometimes fatties try harder.

 

I'm not kidding, dead serious, she was not fat. She was normal sized, about 5'5" with gigantic breasts.

 

I still think about it when I'm getting my spank on sometimes.

[JT 137]

Keeping pace with a wife 17 years younger.

[Mookz 1,287]

Banged two different chicks within an hour of each other. Neither of them ever knew.

 

You're that small?

[shotsup 832]

First of all 3 chicks in one day. On my birthday.

 

First with the GF then dropped her off home. Ended up at a bar with friends and me and this guy pick up two broads and head to another freinds place who we knew wasn't home.

 

This is where the technically comes in. I was banging this one chick in the bed room and my friend passed out on the couch on his chick so she came (no pun intended) in the bed with us and I got to fvck them both but I couldn't get them to do stuff to each other no matter how much I tried. (Begged). A threesome ??

 

 

Thank you Tommy M for passing out !!!!

[Mungwater 588]

I pulled a 35 year old, very attractive African American girl's number (38DD) at a cafeteria where I was working for the summer when I was 19 or 20, and went over to her place and hit it later that night. And it was focking awesome.

 

I was dating a girl at the time, so I never went back. I'm still kicking myself for that 28 years later.

I'm imagining the chick from road trip

[OldMaid 1,838]

[jerryskids 5,194]

I slept with a chick within 5 minutes of meeting her.

 

I've got a longer one I'll post later at home on my computer.

[Jeff Garcia 8]

 

You're that small?

 

 

[OldMaid 1,838]

I slept with a chick within 5 minutes of meeting her.

Is that how long it took to count out $80.00 in ones?

[jerryskids 5,194]

Is that how long it took to count out $80.00 in ones?

Pow veal%$#!

 

I'll tell the longer version later as well.

[nzoner 936]

Company Christmas party,my single female boss and the office secretary invited me back for an after party so after I dropped my date off I returned.We had a little smoke and put The Police on the turntable.The secretary actually made the first move and from there it was on,what I wouldn't give for another threesome like that.

[frank 2,144]

I once got busy in a Burger King bathroom.

[Frank M 181]

I once got busy in a Burger King bathroom.

Is your name Humpty, pronounced with an Umpty?

[Frank M 181]

I'm imagining the chick from road trip

Not even close. Hot, like truly hot, like I had no business having that kind of success.

[taco breath 419]

picked up a girl in a bar and went back to her place. stuck it in all 3 holes within an hour and left.

[montana 89]

I believe I have 4 "records" amongst my friends.

 

1. Biggest difference in age within a 2 day span:

19 & 43....I was 32. The 43 yr old is still THE best lay/bjs ever. Not even close - she was AWESOME!

 

2. Most in a 7 day span (no repeats): 10. I was 32.

 

3. Two different races within 24 hours: Caucasian & Blaxican. I was 32....or would this be 3 races in a technicality?

 

4. Most MFF 3-somes total: 3 (1 @ 19 yrs old, other 2 @ 32yrs old).

 

I got divorced @ 32 after being (loyal) with the same woman for 12 years. I believe I approached close to 150 customers served that year. Sadly, not an overestimated guess.

[montana 89]

I believe I have 4 "records" amongst my friends.

 

1. Biggest difference in age within a 2 day span:

19 & 43....I was 32. The 43 yr old is still THE best lay/bjs ever. Not even close - she was AWESOME!

 

2. Most in a 7 day span (no repeats): 10. I was 32.

 

3. Two different races within 24 hours: Caucasian & Blaxican. I was 32....or would this be 3 races in a technicality?

 

4. Most MFF 3-somes total: 3 (1 @ 19 yrs old, other 2 @ 32yrs old).

 

I got divorced @ 32 after being (loyal) with the same woman for 12 years. I believe I approached close to 150 customers served that year. Sadly, not an overestimated guess.

Some were hot, some were ok, a few were average to below average....only 2-3 where yeti's.

[FishHead 3]

I was married for many many many years and would never have admitted this during that time but we are now Separated heading towards Divorce and so I'll let it go.

After I met my Wife and while we were dating but before Marriage, I had a one-night (sexual) stand with a woman who had a top 10 recording on Billboard's Top 100.

That woman has since had 10+ #1 Songs, recorded more than 30 albums and is a 2014 Nominee for Rock'n'Roll's Hall Of Fame.

I doubt seriously she remembers our encounter and surely doesn't know wtf I am.

[shotsup 832]

I was married for many many many years and would never have admitted this during that time but we are now Separated heading towards Divorce and so I'll let it go.

After I met my Wife and while we were dating but before Marriage, I had a one-night (sexual) stand with a woman who had a top 10 recording on Billboard's Top 100.

That woman has since had 10+ #1 Songs, recorded more than 30 albums and is a 2014 Nominee for Rock'n'Roll's Hall Of Fame.

I doubt seriously she remembers our encounter and surely doesn't know wtf I am.