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Voltaire

Traditional values

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I'm too young for my kids to start dating but the other thread got me to thinking...

 

I'm raising my kids in a traditional nuclear family, which includes a wife who'd been a real estate professional who'd set aside her career a few years and took time off work to stay at home while they were young and is now working again. I'd much, much prefer when the time comes for them to date/marry, thsy my children prioritize men or women raised similarly with similar values to ours.

 

In the gay marriage thread, the conversation shifted to gay adoption. It seems to me that people that were raised in non-traditional relationships, divorced, gay, whatever, come with huge red flags that would mean to proceed with caution. That so many kids nowadays come from these non-traditional situations, combined with all this hook-up culture BS, they don't know what normal family life is supposed to be like. I do not want want my family dissolving down that sh*thole that so many others deal with.

 

The safest bet is to go find someone respectable and responsible from a family like ours. If somebody from a less-than-ideal situation wants to reject that screwd up situation and wants better for their own kids in a traditional family life, that's cool, they'd have to demonstrate resolve to want that, then proceed. But if that's not the case, leave the kids from focked up families and those engaged in hook-up culture to find happiness amongst themselves and leave mine alone.

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They are going to do what they want and will crap all over whatever retarded arranged marriage BS this thread is about.

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My parents divorced when I was young. Maybe 9 years old?

 

On balance, I find many of my friends whos parents stayed together had just as many issues. They stayed together, but hated each other in many cases.

 

Of course, my mom remarried about a year later and my stepdad has been around ever since. That helped Im sure.

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They are going to do what they want and will crap all over whatever retarded arranged marriage BS this thread is about.

In china, the parents have far more say than you think.

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In china, the parents have far more say than you think.

it's amazing how much leverage you have when it's okay to drown your daughter.

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I'm back in China now and thinking out loud how focked up so much US family life is

 

We're raising out kids with our values, I've got to press on my kids to make sure to look for and pick somebody with those same values or else risk their life blowing up.

 

Can't be having them getting relationship advice from some pink-haired non-binary gender studies professor.

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Are you focking high? Do you smoke crack? Are you retarded or something?

 

I can count on one hand the amount of GUYS I have met in my life that were happily married. Women, sure, quite a few. But the guys, mostly all miserable. And nearly all of my married buddies have confided in me they cant wait for kids to grow up and get out, or they are jealous of me, or that they are miserable, etc.

 

Fock that sh!t and your traditional values lol. You are either delusional or lying to yourself or don't get out much. Probably all 3. Marriage is a suckers bet for men. We are hard wired to sleep around. Women are hard wired to nest. Fight that, fight your true nature, fight what you are inside, and live a life of misery and regret. It is what it is.

 

I do agree with the part about women staying home to raise the kids. I think that is their true nature. I won't begrudge a woman going for career over family. I just don't think she will be truly happy in the end. If she is honest with herself.

 

Your post is pure BS just based on our inherent DNA alone. I didn't even begin to touch on your implication of staying in a relationship with someone that doesn't make you happy. Stick it out for the family values bullsh!t. A lot of people do that and it is beyond dumb. Life too short for that sh!t too.

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I agree Volts... good post. There is something to be said for family influence in your relationship. Nobody wants a sh!t in law your kid brings into the family. No only do you want the best for your child, but the entire family suffers.

 

Notice the guys sh!tting on your post have such great lives themselves.

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I agree Volts... good post. There is something to be said for family influence in your relationship. Nobody wants a sh!t in law your kid brings into the family. No only do you want the best for your child, but the entire family suffers.

 

Notice the guys sh!tting on your post have such great lives themselves.

I just think its kinda sh!tty to reject someone because of their family. Assuming they overcame such objectionable traits, whats the problem? In fact, one can say that overcoming such things made them stronger.

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Certainly you raise your kids to value what you do. That is unquestioned.

But how they turn out and what they make of their lives is still up to them and their surroundings.

I've heard so many touts of "traditional" values and they come from people who have divorced. Or they come from people who I know have cheated on their spouse. Do what works for you, teach and impart what you'd like for your kids but regardless of how and what comes, support and hope for happiness for yourself and those you love.

If your kid is gay and wants to adopt... be there. If you have an open relationship with your SO and it works, all the power to you. If the wife makes the money and you don't, enjoy and extra beer during the day and maybe make a sammich for her once in a while.

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Volty - you used a word that is becoming more and more difficult to define... NORMAL.

 

It's hard to get you head around this but NORMAL is dead... there is no normal anymore... NORMAL is what we had when there were only 3 TV channels... and only 10 or so books were read an on the best sellers list.... and the same 50 songs got played over and over by the record execs who decided what "Normal" was for the masses in the middle of the bell curve.

 

NORMAL... is, in many cases - AVERAGE. And Average stores, with average products, for average people do not win anymore... Average companies, that hire average people, who remain perfectly average and predictable for 40 years - do not exist anymore.

 

You have to let your kids find their own NORMAL - whatever they are truly good, passionate, and talented at... you have to guide them towards it. Don't shackle them with YOUR rigid expectations - let them figure it out on their own with your morals and values quietly baked into their decision making process.

 

I understand the point of your original post. Of course you want them to have good morals and values - traditions are a good thing and being traditional helps keep you grounded... you want them to understand hard work, commitment, and fairness and right from wrong... and to have all that built in while being successful, safe, and happy. But you don't have to force them to hang out with the fake-happy Ozzie and Harriets of today to get there.

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One of my uncles is the epitome of a great family man. Has a really good job. Has done great saving for retirement. My other Uncle is the absolute scum of the earth.

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Are you focking high? Do you smoke crack? Are you retarded or something?

 

I can count on one hand the amount of GUYS I have met in my life that were happily married. Women, sure, quite a few. But the guys, mostly all miserable. And nearly all of my married buddies have confided in me they cant wait for kids to grow up and get out, or they are jealous of me, or that they are miserable, etc.

 

Fock that sh!t and your traditional values lol. You are either delusional or lying to yourself or don't get out much. Probably all 3. Marriage is a suckers bet for men. We are hard wired to sleep around. Women are hard wired to nest. Fight that, fight your true nature, fight what you are inside, and live a life of misery and regret. It is what it is.

 

I do agree with the part about women staying home to raise the kids. I think that is their true nature. I won't begrudge a woman going for career over family. I just don't think she will be truly happy in the end. If she is honest with herself.

 

Your post is pure BS just based on our inherent DNA alone. I didn't even begin to touch on your implication of staying in a relationship with someone that doesn't make you happy. Stick it out for the family values bullsh!t. A lot of people do that and it is beyond dumb. Life too short for that sh!t too.

you're the focking idiot.

 

good post voltaire. it's one of my biggest fears...my kids ending up like the growing number of depressed lost souls i see all the time with non-stop BS drama, stepkids, baby mamas, etc etc. i tell my son all the time already...be very very careful who you marry. lot of damaged goods out there. it's like were going backwards where everyone's just a selfish fock.

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Volty - you used a word that is becoming more and more difficult to define... NORMAL.

 

It's hard to get you head around this but NORMAL is dead... there is no normal anymore... NORMAL is what we had when there were only 3 TV channels... and only 10 or so books were read an on the best sellers list.... and the same 50 songs got played over and over by the record execs who decided what "Normal" was for the masses in the middle of the bell curve.

 

NORMAL... is, in many cases - AVERAGE. And Average stores, with average products, for average people do not win anymore... Average companies, that hire average people, who remain perfectly average and predictable for 40 years - do not exist anymore.

 

You have to let your kids find their own NORMAL - whatever they are truly good, passionate, and talented at... you have to guide them towards it. Don't shackle them with YOUR rigid expectations - let them figure it out on their own with your morals and values quietly baked into their decision making process.

 

I understand the point of your original post. Of course you want them to have good morals and values - traditions are a good thing and being traditional helps keep you grounded... you want them to understand hard work, commitment, and fairness and right from wrong... and to have all that built in while being successful, safe, and happy. But you don't have to force them to hang out with the fake-happy Ozzie and Harriets of today to get there.

Great point about the word. I use it in quotes when describing my autistic son to people. I hate doing it because it's wrong and non-descriptive really but it is just an easy word for people to still understand.

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I figure it is my job as a parent to teach my kids how to be good people based on my view of the world. So, that is based on my values and not necessarily what "traditional" is. There are many people in nuclear families who are focked up, so I am not sure that "traditional" is better in my view.

 

Heck, I have a traditional nuclear family (wife of 23 years, 2 kids, dog, house, family goes to Church, etc.), but my parents were divorced.

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I figure it is my job as a parent to teach my kids how to be good people based on my view of the world. So, that is based on my values and not necessarily what "traditional" is. There are many people in nuclear families who are focked up, so I am not sure that "traditional" is better in my view.

 

Heck, I have a traditional nuclear family (wife of 23 years, 2 kids, dog, house, family goes to Church, etc.), but my parents were divorced.

 

:thumbsup:

 

My wife and I both come from divorce families. We have been married 22 years and counting. The parents of my best friend growing up were married for over 60 years. He's now on his third wife. The parents of my wife's best friend growing up have been married for over 50 years, she's on her third husband.

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Certainly you raise your kids to value what you do. That is unquestioned.

But how they turn out and what they make of their lives is still up to them and their surroundings.

I've heard so many touts of "traditional" values and they come from people who have divorced. Or they come from people who I know have cheated on their spouse. Do what works for you, teach and impart what you'd like for your kids but regardless of how and what comes, support and hope for happiness for yourself and those you love.

If your kid is gay and wants to adopt... be there. If you have an open relationship with your SO and it works, all the power to you. If the wife makes the money and you don't, enjoy and extra beer during the day and maybe make a sammich for her once in a while.

 

This guy gets it. Raise your kids to hustle and be good people. Staying in a marriage you're not happy in just as an example to them is absolutely NOT the way to do that. In fact, it will probably just fock them up.

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you're the focking idiot.

 

good post voltaire. it's one of my biggest fears...my kids ending up like the growing number of depressed lost souls i see all the time with non-stop BS drama, stepkids, baby mamas, etc etc. i tell my son all the time already...be very very careful who you marry. lot of damaged goods out there. it's like were going backwards where everyone's just a selfish fock.

 

FYI, "traditional values" was always BS. The times are getting better not worse. I think it is time for you and your ilk to wander off and find the elephant grave yard you miserable fock.

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FYI, "traditional values" was always BS. The times are getting better not worse. I think it is time for you and your ilk to wander off and find the elephant grave yard you miserable fock.

:lol:

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FYI, "traditional values" was always BS. The times are getting better not worse.

 

For some it was BS - for some it wasn't.

 

And the "times" are getting better in a lot of ways... but worse too... as "NORMAL" goes away, the breadth of everything is expanding - in part bc of technology... the range of things both wonderful and terrible is expanding.

 

And this ties into WHY I'm not a fan of our shock-jock, sensationalized, negative, media culture... there is no record exec anymore, there is no TV exec, and there is no news editor anymore that are curating the content... nobody is filtering anything... and that means it's up to the public to be the curators... that's both good and bad... we will become EXACTLY what we allow ourselves to become with every click, share, and second of attention we give to the Kardashian garbage that surrounds us.

 

We have freedom of speech more than ever, anyone/everyone can self publish and be heard - but it is now up to the public more than ever to truly decide what will be consumed and and what media will be spread and allowed to shape who and what we are. Are you tuned into a one-sided news outlet that's continually arguing? If so, you're part of the problem and you're part of the reason your kids won't grow up knowing how to be anything besides an argumentative, self important, self centered, know it all.

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For some it was BS - for some it wasn't.

 

And the "times" are getting better in a lot of ways... but worse too... as "NORMAL" goes away, the breadth of everything is expanding - in part bc of technology... the range of things both wonderful and terrible is expanding.

 

And this ties into WHY I'm not a fan of our shock-jock, sensationalized, negative, media culture... there is no record exec anymore, there is no TV exec, and there is no news editor anymore that are curating the content... nobody is filtering anything... and that means it's up to the public to be the curators... that's both good and bad... we will become EXACTLY what we allow ourselves to become with every click, share, and second of attention we give to the Kardashian garbage that surrounds us.

 

We have freedom of speech more than ever, anyone/everyone can self publish and be heard - but it is now up to the public more than ever to truly decide what will be consumed and and what media will be spread and allowed to shape who and what we are. Are you tuned into a one-sided news outlet that's continually arguing? If so, you're part of the problem and you're part of the reason your kids won't grow up knowing how to be anything besides an argumentative, self important, self centered, know it all.

We dont live in a special exclusive time. Yes the lines have been blurred a bit between what is normal and not... but dying your hair pink, chopping your off and calling yourself Sally isnt normal and if you talk to leftist it would be.

 

Thats just something hipsters say to be cool. What is normal bro? Like what does that even mean? You know what Im saying?

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You will be raising your kids in China and living in China the rest of your life, normal will never be a thing for you.

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Make sure your kids know how big the world is and how many great, like-minded people are in it.

 

If they have a narrow view of the world or limited experience with people outside their immediate vicinity, they wont get the whole

plenty of fish concept.

 

Going away to college is probably a good way for learn the concept. Hopefully, theyre responsible enough to make good decisions by then.

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Make sure your kids know how big the world is and how many great, like-minded people are in it.

 

If they have a narrow view of the world or limited experience with people outside their immediate vicinity, they wont get the whole

plenty of fish concept.

 

Going away to college is probably a good way for learn the concept. Hopefully, theyre responsible enough to make good decisions by then.

Well that's another huge worry there too, isn't it? Here I go again...

 

I dunno. College may remain the ticket to professional jobs but it's also where all the whackjob ex-hippie freaks congregate, they hijacked the US educational system, and are devolving the country to p*ss.. The faculty seeks to turn boys into spineless dweebs and girls into masculine b*tches. Or at least it sure seems that way.

 

I sincerely do want my kids to get the whole college experience with the clubs and social activites and whatnot but putting them under the authority of the PC circus freaks make me wonder if the boring/cheap Chinese universities aren't actually the better option.

 

At University of Michigan, the PC is run amok. My daughter's preferred pronoun is Miss Voltaire, not Zir nor Ms. Going to Michigan State means half her tuition will be paying for a sex abuse scandal. The rest of the state's public schools are academically noncompetitive admission and likely overrun with PC bullsh*t too while the private schools are too expensive. Are there any non-corrupted public universities left?

 

I'm ashamed to admit this, and I never thought I'd ever say this, and further maybe I'm wrong since I live in China and haven't got my finger on the pulse of the US so well anymore, but what I'm reading of what education is in US universities these days utterly horrifies me. It's just awful. The liberals are focking crazy. Anyway, I'm starting to think that the Chinese Communist Party's propaganda mill education is actually less offensive to me than the the White American Left's propaganda mill education. It bothers me far less and is much more easily cured since the people who go through the Chinese system mostly see through the hollow/shallow rah-rah Communist BS and put up with it with a wink and a nod. Whereas the products of the American Left's education/indoctrination -barf- so many young people buy into that sh*t.

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If we really live in a capitalist system, the market shouid be filling the void for people who don't want to send their kids to the freakshow that is the US college system. And employers who don't want these programmed snowflakes.

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If we really live in a capitalist system, the market shouid be filling the void for people who don't want to send their kids to the freakshow that is the US college system. And employers who don't want these programmed snowflakes.

It should, but it hasn't. That's odd to say the least.

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Well that's another huge worry there too, isn't it? Here I go again...

 

I dunno. College may remain the ticket to professional jobs but it's also where all the whackjob ex-hippie freaks congregate, they hijacked the US educational system, and are devolving the country to p*ss.. The faculty seeks to turn boys into spineless dweebs and girls into masculine b*tches. Or at least it sure seems that way.

 

I sincerely do want my kids to get the whole college experience with the clubs and social activites and whatnot but putting them under the authority of the PC circus freaks make me wonder if the boring/cheap Chinese universities aren't actually the better option.

 

At University of Michigan, the PC is run amok. My daughter's preferred pronoun is Miss Voltaire, not Zir nor Ms. Going to Michigan State means half her tuition will be paying for a sex abuse scandal. The rest of the state's public schools are academically noncompetitive admission and likely overrun with PC bullsh*t too while the private schools are too expensive. Are there any non-corrupted public universities left?

 

I'm ashamed to admit this, and I never thought I'd ever say this, and further maybe I'm wrong since I live in China and haven't got my finger on the pulse of the US so well anymore, but what I'm reading of what education is in US universities these days utterly horrifies me. It's just awful. The liberals are focking crazy. Anyway, I'm starting to think that the Chinese Communist Party's propaganda mill education is actually less offensive to me than the the White American Left's propaganda mill education. It bothers me far less and is much more easily cured since the people who go through the Chinese system mostly see through the hollow/shallow rah-rah Communist BS and put up with it with a wink and a nod. Whereas the products of the American Left's education/indoctrination -barf- so many young people buy into that sh*t.

If they can think for themselves, they wont be under the control of anyone, ever.

 

Doesnt sound like the Chinese system encourages that.

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Why can't we have schools that just teach. 1 plus 1 is two. We don't need to ask how 3 feels about it.

Or news that just reports the news. No yellow journalism. Just the facts.

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I just think its kinda sh!tty to reject someone because of their family. Assuming they overcame such objectionable traits, whats the problem? In fact, one can say that overcoming such things made them stronger.

This guy gets it/

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Well that's another huge worry there too, isn't it? Here I go again...

 

I dunno. College may remain the ticket to professional jobs but it's also where all the whackjob ex-hippie freaks congregate, they hijacked the US educational system, and are devolving the country to p*ss.. The faculty seeks to turn boys into spineless dweebs and girls into masculine b*tches. Or at least it sure seems that way.

 

I sincerely do want my kids to get the whole college experience with the clubs and social activites and whatnot but putting them under the authority of the PC circus freaks make me wonder if the boring/cheap Chinese universities aren't actually the better option.

 

At University of Michigan, the PC is run amok. My daughter's preferred pronoun is Miss Voltaire, not Zir nor Ms. Going to Michigan State means half her tuition will be paying for a sex abuse scandal. The rest of the state's public schools are academically noncompetitive admission and likely overrun with PC bullsh*t too while the private schools are too expensive. Are there any non-corrupted public universities left?

 

I'm ashamed to admit this, and I never thought I'd ever say this, and further maybe I'm wrong since I live in China and haven't got my finger on the pulse of the US so well anymore, but what I'm reading of what education is in US universities these days utterly horrifies me. It's just awful. The liberals are focking crazy. Anyway, I'm starting to think that the Chinese Communist Party's propaganda mill education is actually less offensive to me than the the White American Left's propaganda mill education. It bothers me far less and is much more easily cured since the people who go through the Chinese system mostly see through the hollow/shallow rah-rah Communist BS and put up with it with a wink and a nod. Whereas the products of the American Left's education/indoctrination -barf- so many young people buy into that sh*t.

You're going overboard with your fear of PC and libruhl culture. Teach your kids good values as you define them and how to think critically. Don't limit who they interact with or their educational opportunities.

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If they can think for themselves, they wont be under the control of anyone, ever.

 

Doesnt sound like the Chinese system encourages that.

I see that bubble hasn't popped for you yet. Free speech isn't much of a priority on US campuses these days. I'd be walking on eggshells as everybody is hyper-offended, except for the white kids who are too shamed to stand up for insults hurled at them and their ancestors.

 

Or ...eh... maybe I'm wrong. I went to a leftish school and havent set foot on a US campus in almost twenty years. Going by what I read...

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You're going overboard with your fear of PC and libruhl culture. Teach your kids good values as you define them and how to think critically. Don't limit who they interact with or their educational opportunities.

Spot on. Hes going way overboard and seems to be getting influenced by the GC who would have you think roving gangs of liberals are combing the streets turning kids gay. Just teach your kids basic human decency, they will be leaving the nest ASAP to get away from their horrifically overbearing Asian mother anyway. Spoiler alert Volty, they are leaving for the USA as soon as they can and never coming back to China.

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they will be leaving the nest ASAP to get away from their horrifically overbearing Asian mother anyway.

Yeah, there's always that too.

 

The cheapest way is through Chinese schools. They can work part-time (doing what I do) to pay for school here. Come out debt-free.

 

It's more bare-bones and far less fun but otherwise picking up all that debt to put up with all those overbearing freaks may be worth it. Also, unlike the American Left, the Chinese university professors actually and respect America. Imagine that, I talk to university professors who rave about how GOOD America is.

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Spot on. Hes going way overboard and seems to be getting influenced by the GC who would have you think roving gangs of liberals are combing the streets turning kids gay. Just teach your kids basic human decency, they will be leaving the nest ASAP to get away from their horrifically overbearing Asian mother anyway. Spoiler alert Volty, they are leaving for the USA as soon as they can and never coming back to China.

Agree on all counts. :thumbsup:

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Personally, I'm sick of these asxshole chinks flooding over here. You don't see losers who suck at life giving up on America and going to China do you?

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Personally, I'm sick of these asxshole chinks flooding over here. You don't see losers who suck at life giving up on America and going to China do you?

:unsure: Yes you do.

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