Stand up wipers

[tanatastic 2,061]

Yeah like I trust the testimonials from geek club posters. I'm sure if I visited a tranny forum they would all tell me what a good idea tying a rubber band around my cack really tight is.

Ok..heres a random google search poll. https://www.strawpoll.me/1147957/r

 

5k votes, 2900 say sit, 2100 say stand. This should show you its not uncommon either way. If you want 100 other examples of multiple people on both sides of this fence let me know, its a simple search.

 

Heres a random buzzfeed article about it. Votes at bottom, 55% sit, 45% stand. https://www.buzzfeed.com/shanemadej/men-debate-whether-you-should-sit-or-stand-when-you-wipe-you?utm_term=.gc8NQMrQyE#.gc8NQMrQyE

 

The common theme when you google is that standers have tried sitting but it doesnt work as well and sitters are shocked that standers even exist lol.

[fandandy 3,311]

I still don't like the idea of poo residue constantly being injected into my anus... Do you really think the hotel staff makes sure the bidet nozzle is 100% poo free?

Do you think the hotel staff washes the comforter after each fat dude masturbates in the bed? Unlikely. You took a blue light into any hotel room and I bet you'd think you're on acid.

[titans&bucs&bearsohmy! 2,745]

I still don't like the idea of poo residue constantly being injected into my anus... Do you really think the hotel staff makes sure the bidet nozzle is 100% poo free?

Dude the nozzle doesnt go IN your ass or anything. Nor is it directly beneath your ass hole. It is toward the back of the bowl. You kind of lean forward and it hits at an angle. You have to kind of spread your cheeks to get everything. Its not like being sodomized with a pressure washer or anything.

 

I was skeptical at first too. But Im a convert.

[MDC 5,877]

Dude the nozzle doesnt go IN your ass or anything.

What else is the enema machine in fancy hotels for?

[KSB2424 3,082]

After further thought I may have figured out the proper method for an acceptable wipe sitting experience.

 

Lean North Northwest, or 11 oclock. At the same time one must use the left hand to cup the entire jewels (think a baseball cup) to ensure no improper touching of genital to porcelain. Use right hand to come in at 5 oclock to wipe front to back. Preferably folded for maximum surface area. Repeat until clean.

[titans&bucs&bearsohmy! 2,745]

After further thought I may have figured out the proper method for an acceptable sitting experience.

 

Lean North Northwest, or 11 oclock. At the same time one must use the left hand to cup the entire jewels (think a baseball cup) to ensure no improper touching of genital to porcelain. Use right hand to come in at 5 oclock to wipe front to back. Preferably folded for maximum surface area. Repeat until clean.

I lean back, fish the cack and bawls up out of the way, and go straight up the middle myself.

[tanatastic 2,061]

Just asked my wife, she was hesitant to divulge her technique. I eventually got it out of her that she is also a stander and she agreed that sitters just dont get as clean and theres not enough leverage and room to operate. Maybe you sitters need to accept that we standers are higher evolved beings and you should try it instead of judging.

[titans&bucs&bearsohmy! 2,745]

Just asked my wife, she was hesitant to divulge her technique. I eventually got it out of her that she is also a stander and she agreed that sitters just dont get as clean and theres not enough leverage and room to operate. Maybe you sitters need to accept that we standers are higher evolved beings and you should try it instead of judging.

I figured she would just let newbie take care of it.

[tanatastic 2,061]

I figured she would just let newbie take care of it.

Hes like an extra thourough bidet. But good luck, she is more opposed to ass play than any woman ever. Better luck cracking the davinci code than getting her to play ball.

[titans&bucs&bearsohmy! 2,745]

Hes like an extra thourough bidet. But good luck, she is more opposed to ass play than any woman ever. Better luck cracking the davinci code than getting her to play ball.

I feel your pain on that one.

 

Anal is one of those things I just want to try once. Never done it.

 

Should have paid extra to one of those wh0res I guess.

[Mookz 1,287]

Just asked my wife, she was hesitant to divulge her technique. I eventually got it out of her that she is also a stander and she agreed that sitters just dont get as clean and theres not enough leverage and room to operate. Maybe you sitters need to accept that we standers are higher evolved beings and you should try it instead of judging.

 

Good for her. Sitting has always seemed like the more effeminate way of doing it, to me. Maybe because girls have to wipe their fronts when they pee, and I'm assuming they stay seated for that.

Did any of your polls show a gender difference between sitting and standing?

[vuduchile 1,940]

Hes like an extra thourough bidet. But good luck, she is more opposed to ass play than any woman ever. Better luck cracking the davinci code than getting her to play ball.

Its not over til its over

 

My wife was the same way for the first 5 years of our marriage.

 

Now, its an occasional treat for both of us.

 

Make sure shes really really revved up and maybe a little drunk. Start with a little surface rubbing.

 

Do it again weeks later. Eventually, work the first knuckle in, and so on.

 

Gotta have patience. Wife anal is a long con.

[tanatastic 2,061]

 

Good for her. Sitting has always seemed like the more effeminate way of doing it, to me. Maybe because girls have to wipe their fronts when they pee, and I'm assuming they stay seated for that.

Did any of your polls show a gender difference between sitting and standing?

Not that I could see. I know they stay seated to wipe when they pee. Butts are all the same so it can go either way.

[BunnysBastatrds 1,911]

Ill bet you sitters dont even look at the paper after you wipe. You just wipe a set amount of times (2-3) and move on. Gross. Theres a reason your friends call you The streak, it aint because you are fast.

.

 

All of those sitter wipers who wear fruit of the loom tidy whites have skid marks. Your wife is disgusted. Stand tall and wipe that turd cutter so she doesn't have to se your poor wiping skills.

 

 

Buddy of mine was in boot camp. He was a stander wiper. He was shamed into being a sitter wiper. Got home and felt freedom standing wiping.

[penultimatestraw 473]

Of course he is good people, they arent malicious lies, its just keeping up with the joneses. He works construction or drywall Im pretty sure. Oh and yea thats the best one, the IT guy thats somehow making boatloads of money and has his own office, lol sure.

Where do people with decent jobs post?

[penultimatestraw 473]

i also do not experience squishy poo

The healthier one’s diet, the softer the poo.

[DonS 3,063]

I feel your pain on that one.

 

Anal is one of those things I just want to try once. Never done it.

 

Should have paid extra to one of those wh0res I guess.

I'm disappointed that nobody responded to this easy softball right down the middle... You guys are slipping.

[Frozenbeernuts 1,652]

Dude the nozzle doesnt go IN your ass or anything. Nor is it directly beneath your ass hole. It is toward the back of the bowl. You kind of lean forward and it hits at an angle. You have to kind of spread your cheeks to get everything. Its not like being sodomized with a pressure washer or anything.

 

I was skeptical at first too. But Im a convert.

I didn't think the nozzle went in the butt, but I'm pretty sure the water jet finds its way inside your rectals.

 

I can deal with maids not doing their job in about every other facet. I cannot imagine having someone else's poo cramed up my behind

[Frozenbeernuts 1,652]

Ok..heres a random google search poll. https://www.strawpoll.me/1147957/r

 

5k votes, 2900 say sit, 2100 say stand. This should show you its not uncommon either way. If you want 100 other examples of multiple people on both sides of this fence let me know, its a simple search.

 

Heres a random buzzfeed article about it. Votes at bottom, 55% sit, 45% stand. https://www.buzzfeed.com/shanemadej/men-debate-whether-you-should-sit-or-stand-when-you-wipe-you?utm_term=.gc8NQMrQyE#.gc8NQMrQyE

 

The common theme when you google is that standers have tried sitting but it doesnt work as well and sitters are shocked that standers even exist lol.

I have pooped besides a ton of different people in stalls across America. I never remember noticing someone shuffling around their stall while they stand and wipe. It probably happened like once or twice, and I just thought they were weirdos. There is no effing way 45% of the country has lost their mind. I have too much damn faith in the American people to admit that we can kiss society goodbye

[titans&bucs&bearsohmy! 2,745]

I'm disappointed that nobody responded to this easy softball right down the middle... You guys are slipping.

Yeah, I was kinda waiting for it myself.

[Patriotsfatboy1 1,432]

Hes like an extra thourough bidet. But good luck, she is more opposed to ass play than any woman ever. Better luck cracking the davinci code than getting her to play ball.

That is odd. Your wifes turd cutter is like a freakin Hershey Highway with me. She cant get enough of it. Big fan of DP too.