Friend's 50th

[wiffleball 4,631]

So,I've known this guy for 40-plus years. His family (Mom here, 2 sisters in Calif) want to throw a surprise for his 50th. Want my help. Fock that. See if you can guess why:

 

1. Mom and Dad divorced decades ago. Dad liked his booze. Now, Mom only 'allows' one drink by her adult kids in any social setting. Really? jeesus...

 

2. Friend is divorced. Kids don't even speak to him mostly.

 

3. Friend and friend 2 can't talk - because friend 2 if besties with ex-wife. (oh, it gets worser). Friend 2 is friends with a whole 'nother population of friends.

 

4. Family thinks 'Karen' and friend are in some amazing healthy relationship. This is a big evolution - as 'Karen' and friend is why marriage broke up. (allegedly) So family acceptance huge - but a fantasy he allows to happen. Family would expect her at everything. See below.

 

5. Yeah,um 'Karen's' out of the picture. He's been banging trainwreck (TW) for a long while now. I did a post on how incredibly F'ed up she is probably a year ago now. Otherwise, just accept - Trainwreck. Kids- removed by court. Tatoos, 20 years younger, - and I'm sure I only know the least shady 10%. SHE'll want to be involved. No WAY Friend wants that.

 

5a) So, TW is a secret to well, EVERYbody. So, no mixing anybody who knows of her with - anybody else.

 

Yeah, I'd rather arrange seating at the first Iraqi National Congress than this.

 

I told the family that guys our age aren't big on surprises. Do some kind of family thing with the daughters. Now, they want TWO parties.

 

Not touching THIS shiit with a ten foot.

 

Still, he'll be pissed that I even talked to his sister. Fock him and his shady multi-verse of dysfunction.

 

Good luck following all that. I can't.

[Filthy Fernadez 2,696]

I recommend having Jerry Springer MC this.

[Gladiators 1,903]

So you're focking Karen and getting a little action from Trainwreck on an as-needed basis?

[wiffleball 4,631]

Wouldn't touch TW with a wetsuit encased in an Ebola suit.

 

Safe to say Karen and I speak a lot. She's pretty damn surprised to find out

the family thinks she's a heartbeat away from wife #2. I mean, we're all effed

in our own special way, but damn, this guy's built a web that's virtually impossible

to sustain. - For no real good reason.

He's 50 and single. Do what you do. Let the world adjust - or not.

[TimmySmith 2,782]

Are you guys 50 or 15?

[wiffleball 4,631]

Are you guys 50 or 15?

Fock. My family barely remembered - much less celebrated BD's.

 

Worst part is, he's the youngest. Who the fock does BD's?

But jeesus, he's had to travel out of state 3 times this year alone for that crap.

 

And no, it's not a close family.

 

All I want for my BD is to be dead by the next one.

[TimmySmith 2,782]

Fock. My family barely remembered - much less celebrated BD's.

 

Worst part is, he's the youngest. Who the fock does BD's?

But jeesus, he's had to travel out of state 3 times this year alone for that crap.

 

And no, it's not a close family.

 

All I want for my BD is to be dead by the next one.

Do everyone a huge favor. Throw the bash, invite everyone and drink up. If they can't handle life by now, fock em.

[wiffleball 4,631]

Do everyone a huge favor. Throw the bash, invite everyone and drink up. If they can't handle life by now, fock em.

best I've heard in a long time