Jokes some people find offensive, you find hilarious

[edjr 5,547]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H9xroOuggoc

 

[NorthernVike 2,080]

[wiffleball 4,631]

I'm having kind of a crappy day.

 

I dropped my girlfriend's little kid.

 

In a way, it's my girlfriend's fault.

 

I never asked to be a pallbearer anyway.

[edjr 5,547]

 

If you haven't seen his special on netflix, you have to see it.

 

https://www.netflix.com/title/80043049

 

 

 

"My uncle John runs a summer camp for kids about to be molested"

[NorthernVike 2,080]

 

If you haven't seen his special on netflix, you have to see it.

 

https://www.netflix.com/title/80043049

 

 

 

"My uncle John runs a summer camp for kids about to be molested"

Will definitely look it up. I'm so going to hell for laughing at that though.

[edjr 5,547]

Will definitely look it up. I'm so going to hell for laughing at that though.

[Voltaire 4,554]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4W8--pRKs8I

 

Gilbert Gottfired goes to war with Amy Heckerling's babysitter with Holocaust and underage girl jokes on the Howard Stern show.

 

I heard this live on the air in '97 as I was driving home and actually had to pull off to the side of the road because I was laughing so hard.

[edjr 5,547]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4W8--pRKs8I

 

Gilbert Gottfired goes to war with Amy Heckerling's babysitter with Holocaust and underage girl jokes on the Howard Stern show.

 

I heard this live on the air in '97 as I was driving home and actually had to pull off to the side of the road because I was laughing so hard.

 

 

Howie Hampton's is a pathetic liberal joke now

[SenatorRock 708]

You got to know how clumsy that little lad was

 

[edjr 5,547]

You got to know how clumsy that little lad was

 

 

[supermike80 1,285]

 

I think this is HORRIBLE...But funny

[supermike80 1,285]

This is Bob.

 

Bob has no arms....

 

Knock Knock

 

Who's there?

 

It isn't Bob.

[NorthernVike 2,080]

 

If you haven't seen his special on netflix, you have to see it.

 

https://www.netflix.com/title/80043049

 

 

 

"My uncle John runs a summer camp for kids about to be molested"

 

That was awsome.

[giraldi02 470]

This is Bob.

 

Bob has no arms....

 

Knock Knock

 

Who's there?

 

It isn't Bob.

[SUXBNME 1,322]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H9xroOuggoc

 

Gypsybrat was watching the whole thing tonight when I walked in earlier tonight...

 

Sux: Whacha watching?

 

Gypsy: Some comedian edjr turned me on to

 

Sux: Is he funny?

 

Gypsy: Oh yea...

 

 

I ended up watching the last 40 minutes with him and laughing my ass off...

Dude is morbid as all hell.

 

 

Edjr, after it was over, i told Gypsy about how funny Carlin was, but I don't know his best stand up "concert"

Being that you are his biggest fan, post a link or vid of your favorite here, please

[Voltaire 4,554]

Anthony Jesenick's standup routine is what would happen if phillybear had a son to write comedy for.

 

[edjr 5,547]

That was awsome.

 

[edjr 5,547]

Gypsybrat was watching the whole thing tonight when I walked in earlier tonight...

 

Sux: Whacha watching?

 

Gypsy: Some comedian edjr turned me on to

 

Sux: Is he funny?

 

Gypsy: Oh yea...

 

 

I ended up watching the last 40 minutes with him and laughing my ass off...

Dude is morbid as all hell.

 

 

Edjr, after it was over, i told Gypsy about how funny Carlin was, but I don't know his best stand up "concert"

Being that you are his biggest fan, post a link or vid of your favorite here, please

 

Love it.

 

Sure, I know every one of his specials very well.

 

 

 

On Location: George Carlin at USC 1977

George Carlin: Again! 1978

Carlin at Carnegie 1982

Carlin on Campus 1984

Playin' with Your Head 1986

What Am I Doing in New Jersey? 1988

Doin' It Again 1990

Jammin' in New York 1992

Back in Town 1996

George Carlin: 40 Years of Comedy 1997

You Are All Diseased 1999

Complaints and Grievances 2001

Life Is Worth Losing 2005

It's Bad for Ya 2008

 

 

 

I had listened to Carlin, because of a friend that was a year older than me. We listened on record, I had never actually seen him

 

Then came,1986 and I was 14, and his special 'Playing With Your Head" came on HBO. I recorded it to VHS and played it till it didn't come in clear.

 

I absolutely fell in love with the dude. My friend and I started memorizing bits from the show and doing them for family.

 

 

Here is the whole show, for free.

 

Enjoy

 

Fast forward to the 7 minute mark, not sure what the black and white bit is all about.

 

http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x4a8p17

[SUXBNME 1,322]

bump for big dog

[NorthernVike 2,080]

bump for big dog

Who?

[edjr 5,547]

bump for big dog

 

He calls his handsome roommate big dog

[NorthernVike 2,080]

 

He calls his handsome roommate big dog

When did he get a new roommate?

[edjr 5,547]

When did he get a new roommate?

 

don't you talk bad about Gypsy, aka James

 

[NorthernVike 2,080]

 

don't you talk bad about Gypsy, aka James

 

Come on, you've seen him in some of Sux's videos. I'm not saying that he's ugly but handsome is a bit of a reach.

[fandandy 3,311]

There's nothing better than a cigarette after sex, unless I have sex with a child, then after I'll just eat some candy. I don't smoke around kids.

[NorthernVike 2,080]

There's nothing better than a cigarette after sex, unless I have sex with a child, then after I'll just eat some candy. I don't smoke around kids.

[nzoner 936]

 

[edjr 5,547]

Come on, you've seen him in some of Sux's videos. I'm not saying that he's ugly but handsome is a bit of a reach.

 

I don't recall, I only remember sux

[DonS 3,063]

Pedophiles are focking immature azzholes

[fandandy 3,311]

Pedophiles are focking immature azzholes

You might be on to something cause that joke went over like a lead balloon last Thanksgiving at grandma's house.

[vuduchile 1,940]

I was playing golf with my dad and brother a few years ago and I made a long putt to save a bogey. They said good putt, and without thinking, I said yeah, yeah, but thats sorta like kissing your sister.

 

Dead silence.

 

How could I have forgotten that my brother had once molested our younger sister, throwing our entire family into a tailspin wed never really recovered from?

 

Oops.

[fandandy 3,311]

I was playing golf with my dad and brother a few years ago and I made a long putt to save a bogey. They said good putt, and without thinking, I said yeah, yeah, but thats sorta like kissing your sister.

 

Dead silence.

 

How could I have forgotten that my brother had once molested our younger sister, throwing our entire family into a tailspin wed never really recovered from?

 

Oops.

I liked this but on the condition that the second part is the joke part. If not I unlike it and think you have the cooties.

[NorthernVike 2,080]

Pedophiles are focking immature azzholes

[vuduchile 1,940]

I liked this but on the condition that the second part is the joke part. If not I unlike it and think you have the cooties.

True story. Unfortunately.

[edjr 5,547]

Pedophiles are focking immature azzholes

 

[trumpurethra 42]

Seems like hes trying too hard....not funny. But these however are very offensive and very funny...

 

 

 

How do you get a fat kid to lose weight?

You pay the ice cream man to keep on driving.

She was so fat when she stepped on the scale it said, "To be continued."

A Fat lady is lying on the beach. The lifeguard approaches her and says, "Excuse me ma'am, could you please leave the beach?" The obese lady replies, "Why? What's wrong?" Well you see, says the lifeguard, "It's getting pretty late, and the tide wants to come in!"

[edjr 5,547]

 

Seems like hes trying too hard....not funny. But these however are very offensive and very funny...

 

 

 

How do you get a fat kid to lose weight?

You pay the ice cream man to keep on driving.

She was so fat when she stepped on the scale it said, "To be continued."

A Fat lady is lying on the beach. The lifeguard approaches her and says, "Excuse me ma'am, could you please leave the beach?" The obese lady replies, "Why? What's wrong?" Well you see, says the lifeguard, "It's getting pretty late, and the tide wants to come in!"

 

 

Funny as stale bread

[5-Points 2,716]

What do all battered women have in common?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

They don't listen.

[5-Points 2,716]

There's nothing better than a cigarette after sex, unless I have sex with a child, then after I'll just eat some candy. I don't smoke around kids.

[Voltaire 4,554]

Thank You.

 

The humor went right over my head, My brain only clicked in and processed it after I gave it a second look because of your reaction.