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DaBeerz

NFL Week 3 Picks: Moneyball Rant!

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Lessons Learned after Week 2?

  1. Don’t overreact to week 1, or week 2, but it's week 3 so now is the time to overreact!
  2. Don’t pick four road dog teams to win and expect to make money…then again ATS my picks were pretty bad so I can’t judge too harshly…I should stick to head to head picks.
  3. Picking all home teams (other than the Bills) every single week is a viable strategy in HTH pools! I went 12-3-1 this week and I’m 22-8-2 on the season so far! You gotta Moneyball those picks people. On-base percentage, and slugging percentage is very important, bitches.

 

Odd’s n ends from week 2?

 

As a long-suffering Bills fan, we gotta talk about Vontae Davis. You probably heard about him quitting on the Bills by retiring at halftime? Friends don’t let friends play for the Bills, much less cheer for them. For your amusement here are the best quotes I found about Davis this week:

 

· Playing for the Bills actually broke a players spirit.

· “Fuuuuuuck this sh1iiit” - Vontae

· I can finally say that I’ve seen an NFL player rage quit

· “The Bills are this year’s Browns” - Vontae Davis

· This needs to be a thing on Madden. Throw 5 touchdowns in the first half to Richard Sherman's man, and he rage quits in the locker room and doesn't come back out for the second half. Bonus points if you do it on franchise mode.

· We'll always remember that time the Bills were so bad that Vontae Davis had to retire at halftime.

 

 

Connor and Brown's haircuts are horrific abominations but I fully respect them for bringing back the Mullet and Anchor haircuts (or whatever that thing on the back of Antonio Brown’s head is). Next, some player will bring back the rat-tail, now that would be something.

 

In other Steelers news, allegedly Antonio Brown tweeted a mysterious “trade me” tweet in response to someone saying he wouldn’t be good without Ben. He then skipped work and team meetings on Monday. This means Tomlin will probably buy him ice-cream, give him a nice hot bath and a foot massage, then will insist Ben target him 14-18 times in the next game and throw into double coverage to keep him happy! Gotta love the Diva Wide Receivers...he does realize his team is 0-1-1 and desperate for a win right?

 

Fitzmagic looks like Conor McGregor’s drunk uncle but he’s playing like a boss! I hope Fitzmagic is here to stay…but we all know it’s not. We’re talking about a journeyman’s journeyman who really should be laying drywall but somehow ended up as an NFL QB. Soon he’ll be back to his normal 60% completions and 81% QB rating. Enjoy it while it lasts. As long as he doesn’t touch the beard, he should be fine. Legend has it, if you rub the beard, you get good luck for 2 weeks.

 

Patrick Mahomes throws darts! Now I don’t know if he looks great because the Steelers don’t know how to stop receivers with open field tackles, or maybe they were playing by touch football rules, but KC wasn’t aware of it? Anyway, that kid throws a good ball, that’s all I’m saying, you can’t deny that.

 

Kickers are all terrible. They lost games for their teams left and right (as in outside left or outside right). Browns kicker missed 2 XP and 2 FG and got waived on Monday. Pitt kicker misses twice. Minn kicker misses 3 Field goals, including a FG in OT so they tied the game, and he got cut on Monday as well. Why are we even talking about kickers? It’s enough to make you want to see them retire at halftime…Also if anyone wants to make a “Norwood Wide Right” joke you can shut the hell up, I’m over it. Really.

 

Enough nonsense on with the picks! HTH this time.

 

Jets @Browns – I agonized over this one. At the last minute, I wimped out and picked the Browns. I'm not proud of myself, but hey it's a win.

 

Saints @Falcons – Sorry ‘aints just haven’t looked good this season now they’re on the road and Atlanta is playing better.

 

49ers @Chiefs – Did you not see what I said about Mahomes? Darts man, he throws darts. All to my man Kelce.

 

Raiders @Dolphins – West coast to East coast travel for the raiders, after a tough matchup against the Broncos? Gimmie the Fish.

 

Bills @Vikings – Again, this is a game where you would be well advised by your financial advisor to take a second mortgage on your house, and bet against the Bills.

 

Colts @Eagles – This game is closer than you think, it’s not an auto-win for the Eagles, and Luck has been looking better. I’m just taking the home team here.

 

Packers @Redskins – A road favorite! Muh packers! Colts made the Washington D look pretty piss poor last week, I think Rodgers can do it as well.

 

Bengals @Panthers – Mixon is out getting his knee scoped. Dalton was great last week but he’s not gonna throw 3 TDS to Green every week. Panthers D is better than you think and bring good pressure up front.

 

Titans @Jaguars – Another really close one. It depends on if Fournette plays, Jags need that run game. This one is a game-day decision, check the injury report!

 

Broncos @Ravens – Raven’s won’t cover, but they should win.

 

Giants @Texans – Really are you going to put money on Eli on the road? Really?

 

Chargers @Rams – Rams look very poised to kick the crap out of this division this year. Goff is racking up yards but managing the game. Gurley is smashing multiple TDs every week into the Endzone. Love it. Not just because I own Gurley. I’ll be watching this one for sure, and drinking every time Rivers makes his patented Derp-face or yells at a teammate.

 

Bears @Cardinals – Man the Cardinals are having a tough outing. Khalil Mack is highly entertaining to watch. ‘member back in the day when JJ Watt was a monster and carrying the team on his own, that’s Khalil Mack today.

 

Cowboys @Seahawks – I almost went against my gambling sense and picked Dallas because I didn’t like much of what Wilson did last week, but he was playing against Mack…Dallas defense is not so scary.

 

Patriots @Lions – LOL common. Brady yelled at his teammates. Know what happens when Brady yells at his teammates? The opposite of what happens when Rivers yells at his teammates. Pats win.

 

Steelers @Bucs – Here is the thing. You can’t go 0-3 and make the playoffs in that division and Pitt know it. I’m picking a reasonable upset here, assuming they can keep Fitzmagic to just 2 TDs.

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Connor and Brown's haircuts are horrific abominations but I fully respect them for bringing back the Mullet and Anchor haircuts (or whatever that thing on the back of Antonio Brown’s head is). Next, some player will bring back the rat-tail, now that would be something.

 

 

 

Big Ben wants in on that actions:

 

Nick Foles just wants to talk to you about his D&D campaign and the mathlympics.

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Steelers @Bucs – Here is the thing. You can’t go 0-3 and make the playoffs in that division and Pitt know it. I’m picking a reasonable upset here, assuming they can keep Fitzmagic to just 2 TDs.

How can it be an upset if the Steelers are favored?

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Big Ben wants in on that actions:

 

Nick Foles just wants to talk to you about his D&D campaign and the mathlympics.

 

Foles is a bit of a neckbeard and looks like he would probably roll with a Paladin.

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How can it be an upset if the Steelers are favored?

 

My bad I misread the line, I thought the Bucs were favored by -1.5 I see they're a home-dog.

 

Doesn't change my pick for HTH...

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You really went out on the limb with those picks. Next time scrap the long post and just tell us if there's an upset.

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You really went out on the limb with those picks. Next time scrap the long post and just tell us if there's an upset.

Mmmk what upsets are you picking then?

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Mmmk what upsets are you picking then?

 

Giants is my upset of the week ...23-17 big blue

 

Also like Indy to stay in the game. I think it's going to take wentz at least one half to get up to speed after such a long layoff. Possible upset as well.

 

Arizona is my 3rd. Not buying in Chicago yet. 13-10 in a yawner

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Giants is my upset of the week ...23-17 big blue

Also like Indy to stay in the game. I think it's going to take wentz at least one half to get up to speed after such a long layoff. Possible upset as well.

Arizona is my 3rd. Not buying in Chicago yet. 13-10 in a yawner

You’d have to be high to pick Arizona. They’re on par with the bills until proven otherwise.

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You’d have to be high to pick Arizona. They’re on par with the bills until proven otherwise.

I've learned two valuable lessons that I'd like to share with you when betting this league.....a team is never as good as they seem, and they're also never as bad as they looked the previous week.

 

Your thinking is why squares like you continue the lose money betting

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I've learned two valuable lessons that I'd like to share with you when betting this league.....a team is never as good as they seem, and they're also never as bad as they looked the previous week.

Your thinking is why squares like you continue the lose money betting

Youre right.. the Cards werent AS bad in week 2 when compared to week 1. They were worse.

 

Stick to the CFL

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Youre right.. the Cards werent AS bad in week 2 when compared to week 1. They were worse.

Stick to the CFL

I nailed my upset of the week with the Giants .

 

Nailed my prediction of wentz struggling and Indy keeping it close

 

And ALMOST had Arizona

 

 

I'd like to see you grow some balls and put out some bold picks instead of just hanging out in the peanut gallery chirping others.

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