BunnysBastatrds 1,911 Posted August 7, 2018 What's you got? I'm single soon and need all the help I can get. Found and old but goody. Me: You've got small t!ts. But the lighting is bad. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dain11279 927 Posted August 7, 2018 I must be in a museum, because you truly are a work of art. Also, congrats on being single Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NorthernVike 2,080 Posted August 7, 2018 Excuse me ma'am, does this rag smell like chloroform to you? 2 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cloaca du jour 2,064 Posted August 7, 2018 Hey...did you know there are only 7 planets now? Her: really?? You: yep after I smash Uranus 1 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cloaca du jour 2,064 Posted August 7, 2018 Me: you have a donkey and I have a rooster..your donkey chews the feet off my rooster. What do we have? Her: i dunno Me: 2 feet of my c0ck in your azz. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NorthernVike 2,080 Posted August 7, 2018 Ya wanna make 50 bucks the hard way? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wiffleball 4,631 Posted August 7, 2018 Wow! You are damn near perfect! You know there's only one thing I would change about you. (Insecure, they can't help themselves but ask) Your last name. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patriotsfatboy1 1,432 Posted August 7, 2018 Me: Do you know the difference between jelly and jam? Her: No, what? Me: I won't be jellying my c0ck up your ass later tonight Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Filthy Fernadez 2,696 Posted August 7, 2018 Is that a hemi? Get in the truck b!tch (double) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dain11279 927 Posted August 7, 2018 Hey...did you know there are only 7 planets now? Her: really?? You: yep after I smash Uranus Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
joneo 529 Posted August 7, 2018 Nice shoes...wanna fock? 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jerryskids 5,172 Posted August 7, 2018 Hi, I'm independently wealthy. (I think that was the line that Les Nessman used to pick up Jennifer on WKRP). 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
titans&bucs&bearsohmy! 2,745 Posted August 7, 2018 Ni hao. Ever seen a white d!ck? That may only work over here though. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
joneo 529 Posted August 7, 2018 What's you got? I'm single soon and need all the help I can get. Found and old but goody. Me: You've got small t!ts. But the lighting is bad. You: Hi, do you have any Irish (choose your own ethnicity) in you? Him: No You: Do you want some? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
frank 2,144 Posted August 7, 2018 Ni hao. Ever seen a white d!ck? That may only work over here though. Do they ever say "I'm looking at one right now"? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NorthernVike 2,080 Posted August 7, 2018 Ni hao. Ever seen a white d!ck? That may only work over here though. He is in New Orleans so.... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Djgb13 2,338 Posted August 7, 2018 Nice shoes...wanna fock? Dam man literally was comin to post this. Thing works like a charm 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cyclone24 1,805 Posted August 7, 2018 You look like you'd make a wonderful single mother. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kanil 519 Posted August 7, 2018 It's been a while since I've been in the game so I may be out of practice but I like this one... That shirt looks great on you. It would look better crumpled up and bloody in an evidence bag. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cloaca du jour 2,064 Posted August 7, 2018 Ni hao. Ever seen a white d!ck? That may only work over here though. Then she says...no Then you say" me either" Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
supermike80 1,285 Posted August 7, 2018 I bet You were something before electricity 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NorthernVike 2,080 Posted August 7, 2018 You look like you'd make a wonderful single mother. You know what they say... Once you go black you're a single mother. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The PosterFormerlyKnownAs 61 Posted August 7, 2018 Dam man literally was comin to post this. Thing works like a charm Especially with the fatties who cant see their own shoes. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
fandandy 3,311 Posted August 7, 2018 Hey baby. I'm a dog guy but I'd eat your . Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Vince44 202 Posted August 7, 2018 Grocery store line... You know it's dangerous for you to be in the frozen food section. Why is it? Cause you could melt all this stuff. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TD Ryan2 314 Posted August 7, 2018 "I dated a girl that could touch her elbows behind her back" (watch and smile as she tries to accomplish this and sticks the perkies out for a good show) "Hate to see you leave, love to watch you go" (great recovery if she walks away after the elbow joke) "Do you like boats? I have 7" (owning a boat implies affluence - owning 7 is a dream come true) "Over 20k posts at the Geek Club" (no explanation needed) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
GhostofTEK 71 Posted August 7, 2018 Grocery store line... You know it's dangerous for you to be in the frozen food section. Why is it? Cause you could melt all this stuff. Best line in My Blue Heaven. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cloaca du jour 2,064 Posted August 7, 2018 Hey sweety you have a match? My c0ck and your mouth. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Gladiators 1,904 Posted August 7, 2018 Get in the car. I'll explain later. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NorthernVike 2,080 Posted August 7, 2018 Lets not turn this rape into a murder. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
titans&bucs&bearsohmy! 2,745 Posted August 8, 2018 Do they ever say "I'm looking at one right now"? Sadly, I never had the balls to try this one. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
GhostofTEK 71 Posted August 8, 2018 I'm looking for a good woman to change me. Now where did I put that pack of Depends? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hardcore troubadour 12,595 Posted August 8, 2018 No no, you're not fat, you have an hourglass figure. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
naomi 343 Posted August 9, 2018 Not a general use one but the one that made me laugh afterward the most: interning for Republican state assembly member (not ~stick) and a Democratic leg. staffer introduced himself in the mail room. He mentioned how he'd like to cross party lines. Can't remember exactly how he worked the phrase in but it was good. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SUXBNME 1,322 Posted August 9, 2018 Grocery store line... You know it's dangerous for you to be in the frozen food section. Why is it? Cause you could melt all this stuff. One of my favorite movies Steve Martin just killed it Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cloaca du jour 2,064 Posted August 9, 2018 The word of the day is legs. Spread the word Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SUXBNME 1,322 Posted August 9, 2018 Roses are red Grass is greener I think of you when I play with my weiner (internet thing I looked up) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BunnysBastatrds 1,911 Posted August 9, 2018 I'm not very good with lines. Butt being horizontal changes. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BunnysBastatrds 1,911 Posted August 9, 2018 I need some help moving the furniture around. That junk back there would be a great start. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BunnysBastatrds 1,911 Posted August 9, 2018 Hello darling. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites