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Why Your Team Sucks

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One of my favorite writers Drew Magary does these for each team every year for Deadspin. Personally I think they're hilarious. Fock you if you don't think the same :mad:

 

First up, who else but the Browns? :D

 

http://deadspin.com/why-your-team-sucks-2017-cleveland-browns-1797293528

And your quarterback? ***Spins Wheel*** Damn that made me laugh

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Lions - "..because they are the lions"

 

Shortest article ever.

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Bcoz:

 

Jerry Jones

Jason Garrett

No pass rush

Pitiful LB corps

No FS enforcer

 

That's a good start.

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And your quarterback? ***Spins Wheel*** Damn that made me laugh

Haha yeah that was good.

 

This article seems a lot longer then the ones last year. Could be something new he's doing. Or could just be because the Browns really, really suck :D

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Lol this is hilarious. But the Browns? Come on. That's like shooting fish in a barrel. I want to see his other stuff on different teams. Still, that was funny as hell

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And your quarterback? ***Spins Wheel*** Damn that made me laugh

Ha! Yea that had me going as well lol

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Does he have more? I want to read all the ones he's done cause these are hilarious lol

He'll do it every weekday I think from here til the season starts now. I think he goes in order of sh1ttiest team to best basically. I'll keep posting them in this thread.

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He'll do it every weekday I think from here til the season starts now. I think he goes in order of sh1ttiest team to best basically. I'll keep posting them in this thread.

That's awesome. I can't wait to read them lol

 

After reading the New England one man was that guy wrong about a lot of stuff. Especially Hogan lol. 400 yards and 1 TD? I think he had more than that in one game lol.

 

But the jab at BB? Grumpmaster flash. LMAO. That was gold

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"This team used to play in one of our best cities and was on the cusp of restoring its former glory. Now theyve been uprooted to a cast iron pan located in an office park, where they charge $100 for parking and field a team that you wouldnt recognize even if they handed you a focking program."

 

:overhead:

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This February, the Falcons played the worst half in American sports history and the 49ers just hired the guy responsible for it.

 

Too awesome

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This February, the Falcons played the worst half in American sports history and the 49ers just hired the guy responsible for it.

 

Too awesome

I didn't realize the Falcons only had 5 running plays the second half until this article either lol

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This February, the Falcons played the worst half in American sports history and the 49ers just hired the guy responsible for it.

 

Too awesome

:lol:

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Lions - "..because they are the lions" Because Ford

 

Shortest article ever.

 

even shorter

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One of my favorite writers Drew Magary does these for each team every year for Deadspin. Personally I think they're hilarious. Fock you if you don't think the same :mad:

 

First up, who else but the Browns? :D

 

http://deadspin.com/why-your-team-sucks-2017-cleveland-browns-1797293528

 

I love these, thanks for posting. :doublethumbsup:

 

The comments may be even funnier. I have a hard time believing those were random readers.

 

Alex:

The Browns are the Elon Musk or Steve Jobs of being terrible. We are pioneers of dogshit football.

Zach:

A guy with most of his hand blown off managed to pick-6 us, and that wasn’t even the biggest anti-highlight of the season.

 

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Oh this is going to be fun as a Packers fan..

 

 

Trubisky had major struggles handling the snap from under center.

In the offense's first 11-on-11 work, the rookie quarterback mishandled his first two snaps from center Taylor Boggs, putting both balls on the grass and sending groans through the bleachers. A smattering of sarcastic applause followed when Trubisky secured the third snap and successfully handed off to Ka'Deem Carey. But two snaps later, Trubisky again fumbled the exchange, offering a snapshot into some of the basics he still is trying to master as he begins his NFL career.

 

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They've forgotten how to.....

 

win the BIG ones

House outstanding people as well as players

put teams away ( win early )

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Go Cowboys!

:pointstosky: :pointstosky: :pointstosky:

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They've forgotten how to.....

 

win the BIG ones

House outstanding people as well as players

put teams away ( win early )

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Go Cowboys!

:pointstosky: :pointstosky: :pointstosky:

You left off: rush the passer and make 3rd down stops - especially to Aaron focking Rodgers. :wall:

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You left off: rush the passer and make 3rd down stops - especially to Aaron focking Rodgers. :wall:

 

Oh fock!!!........you're so right! :wall:

 

I guess I'm just used to it. It's beyond sad that I could take his ass out better than our D has, and I'm pushing 60. :mad:

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Dolphins having a rough camp. Ajayi concussion. Tannehill went down with a knee today, possibly a bad one.

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Dolphins having a rough camp. Ajayi concussion. Tannehill went down with a knee today, possibly a bad one.

 

Kaepernick to the rescue!!

 

He's better than Tannehill by the way, one of the coaches probably tripped him.

 

The whole rocking a Castro t-shirt should go well...

 

:lol:

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I am hoping for Gase to turn to Cutler. I'd like to watch Cutler suck 1 more time before he quits. It is too much fun.

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Dang, that team writes itself. :D Also I still love the comments:

 

Steve:

Their whole team will be injured by week 3. Joey Bosa will probably burst into flames, or find some other new way of getting dead.

 

 

:lol:

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Dang, that team writes itself. :D Also I still love the comments:

 

 

:lol:

Haha :lol:

 

I cracked up at that too

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First paragraph!!

 

I have a friend who was a San Diego Chargers fan and disavowed them after the move. But I had COMPLETELY forgotten about all that by April, and texted him for his reaction when they drafted Mike Williams. Like, Ya like the pick?-type garbage. Do NOT do this to a former Chargers fan. They dont forgive you for this kind of oversight. I am a bad friend

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