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What makes a fart loud?


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#1 heavy-set

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Posted 07 July 2006 - 02:21 PM

sometimes my ass is like a trumptet, other times a tuba, other times a supressed handgun, i just dont get it

#2 Red White and Blue

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Posted 07 July 2006 - 02:24 PM

Moisture :thumbsup:

#3 wiffleball

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Posted 07 July 2006 - 02:26 PM

For one thing, your g-string isn't much of a muffler.
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#4 davebg

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Posted 07 July 2006 - 02:26 PM

Speed.

faster = louder

The sounds are produced by vibrations of the anal opening. Sounds depend on the velocity of expulsion of the gas and the tighness of the sphincter muscles of the anus.

http://www.heptune.com/farts.html


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#5 The Elevator Killer

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Posted 07 July 2006 - 02:27 PM

sometimes my ass is like a trumptet, other times a tuba, other times a supressed handgun, i just dont get it


This post made me think of a Far Side where there where these people standing in front of an outhouse with amazed looks on thier faces. Sitting behind the outhouse was a kid practicing the tuba.
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#6 D'ohmer Simpson

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Posted 07 July 2006 - 02:28 PM

Speed.

faster = louder

That makes sense, but I have had some pretty loud ones that just seep out. :thumbsup:
QUOTE(Big Blue 06 @ Oct 5 2006, 10:44 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
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#7 wiffleball

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Posted 07 July 2006 - 02:31 PM

This post made me think of a Far Side where there where these people standing in front of an outhouse with amazed looks on thier faces. Sitting behind the outhouse was a kid practicing the tuba.



LOL :banana:

That makes sense, but I have had some pretty loud ones that just seep out. :thumbsup:


You missed the other variable: "..and the tighness of the sphincter muscles of the anus."


Apparently, you and yours need to stop playing "OZ" so much. :banana:
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#8 D'ohmer Simpson

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Posted 07 July 2006 - 02:34 PM

LOL :banana:
You missed the other variable: "..and the tighness of the sphincter muscles of the anus."
Apparently, you and yours need to stop playing "OZ" so much. :banana:

:thumbsup:

Actually, my tight ass resonates, causing the sound. A wide a-hole opening wouldn't make any noise.
QUOTE(Big Blue 06 @ Oct 5 2006, 10:44 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
There are people like D'homer, that are Eagles fans that are respectful and classy.

#9 The Elevator Killer

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Posted 07 July 2006 - 02:36 PM

LOL :banana:
You missed the other variable: "..and the tighness of the sphincter muscles of the anus."
Apparently, you and yours need to stop playing "OZ" so much. :banana:


OZ? You have flying monkeys coming out of your a$$? Or is that when you fart and someone screams, "I"m melting!"

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#10 SUXBNME

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Posted 07 July 2006 - 02:58 PM

sometimes my ass is like a trumptet, other times a tuba, other times a supressed handgun, i just dont get it


If you ass is sometimes like a trumpet, and other times like a tuba, my guess would be that you do get it. On a fairly regular basis, you overweight fhag :wacko:

#11 TAS

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Posted 07 July 2006 - 04:14 PM

The ability to hear!

:huh: That's all I got for this thread. ;)
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#12 t.j

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Posted 07 July 2006 - 04:23 PM

This post made me think of a Far Side where there where these people standing in front of an outhouse with amazed looks on thier faces. Sitting behind the outhouse was a kid practicing the tuba.

:huh:

#13 lechuza

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Posted 07 July 2006 - 11:11 PM

how come the silent ones seem to smell worse? :clap:

#14 spottedowl

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Posted 07 July 2006 - 11:18 PM

If I had a woodwind near my ass today, I could have been the lead singer of a Rusty album. :shocking:
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