Worst blow jobs

[Gladiators 1,902]

I havent received a bad one.

 

And before you sick focks go there, I have never given a bj. At least not that I remember.

[IGotWorms 3,298]

12th Man. Uses way too much teeth

[jerryskids 5,169]

peenie

[Strike 3,947]

Your mom.

[wiffleball 4,631]

Got a bj from a girl with buck Front Teeth. Well hell, I guess you couldn't have Buck back teeth. Buck upper teeth. As result of that it was like a scraper up and down my shaft. I'm sure she thought she was rocking my world because I was squirming and making noise. I finally had to end that. Good God, that was awful.

[jerryskids 5,169]

Bunny's wife

[12th Man 884]

Poor Worms. I'm in his head.

[MDC 5,876]

Poor Worms. I'm in his head.

Sounds like hes in your mouth.

[IGotWorms 3,298]

Sounds like hes in your mouth.

No I finished

[shotsup 830]

Bunny's wife

Nope. I was able to finish.

[tanatastic 2,061]

Much experience in this subject. Worst Ive had were from the hottest girls. Those are the ones you just get it for a min then move on to tappin it. Best Ive had were the chunky girls. Those are the ones you want to just ride out til the end. Or usually just bang them then request to finish with more head. Sheer bliss.

[jerryskids 5,169]

Worst BJ is kinda like worst steak at a fancy steak restaurant, it's all relative. I got tons of beejers in college, I can't think of a single time where I thought "wow, this is really bad." Why? Because a girl was sucking my focking d1ck. This is generally a good thing.

[titans&bucs&bearsohmy! 2,745]

Worst BJ is kinda like worst steak at a fancy steak restaurant, it's all relative. I got tons of beejers in college, I can't think of a single time where I thought "wow, this is really bad." Why? Because a girl was sucking my focking d1ck. This is generally a good thing.

Yeah a blowie is like a steak. Its pretty hard to Fock up.

 

But it can be done. Teeth usually. Some womens magazine long ago made the claim that a little bit of teeth and nibbling is a good thing. No no no.

[shotsup 830]

Sucking on my balls is not needed

[Kopy 489]

Yeah a blowie is like a steak. Its pretty hard to Fock up.

But it can be done. Teeth usually. Some womens magazine long ago made the claim that a little bit of teeth and nibbling is a good thing. No no no.

I must've had a chick that read that magazine. It was fuckin brutal.

[Patriotsfatboy1 1,432]

Much like pizza, even when it is bad, it is good. If I don't like what she is doing, I use my words and tell her. If she keeps doing it, then she usually ends up getting a c0ck slap across the face or a full facial.

[wiffleball 4,631]

Much like pizza, even when it is bad, it is good. If I don't like what she is doing, I use my words and tell her. If she keeps doing it, then she usually ends up getting a c0ck slap across the face or a full facial.

Do you still use both hands to lift your gunt?

[Patriotsfatboy1 1,432]

Do you still use both hands to lift your gunt?

No belly issues.

[BunnysBastatrds 1,908]

Bunny's wife

This! Have been married for twenty fawking years. Have never once.....ever..... into her mouth.She tries,But its like.....A hard big cack in her mouth using silly putty on a Sunday morning cartoons trying to confuse the application to the inevitable outcome.Garfield likes lasagna. I want to put a load down your throats.

[WhiteWonder 2,171]

Worst BJ is kinda like worst steak at a fancy steak restaurant, it's all relative. I got tons of beejers in college, I can't think of a single time where I thought "wow, this is really bad." Why? Because a girl was sucking my focking d1ck. This is generally a good thing.

 

i would argue worst BJ could be like a frozen minute steak compared to a great steak at a fancy steak place. (and yes, I actually enjoy minute steaks).

 

what it boils down to is enthusiasm.

 

you know those girls who have no interest in having a in their mouth and they just do it because they feel like they have to / you want them to.... those are the bad blow jobs.

[Patriotsfatboy1 1,432]

 

i would argue worst BJ could be like a frozen minute steak compared to a great steak at a fancy steak place. (and yes, I actually enjoy minute steaks).

 

what it boils down to is enthusiasm.

 

you know those girls who have no interest in having a ###### in their mouth and they just do it because they feel like they have to / you want them to.... those are the bad blow jobs.

 

My wife tells me that those girls in the pornos look like they enjoy it because they are getting paid. I usually pull out a $20 bill and tell her to at least look like she is enjoying it.

[DonS 3,063]

 

My wife tells me that those girls in the pornos look like they enjoy it because they are getting paid. I usually pull out a $20 bill and tell her to at least look like she is enjoying it.

Are you brave enough to make that offer when your d1ck is in her mouth? Sounds like an ER visit waiting to happen.

[Hardcore troubadour 12,588]

The worst blowjob is the one you don't get. /thread.

[jerryskids 5,169]

 

i would argue worst BJ could be like a frozen minute steak compared to a great steak at a fancy steak place. (and yes, I actually enjoy minute steaks).

 

what it boils down to is enthusiasm.

 

you know those girls who have no interest in having a ###### in their mouth and they just do it because they feel like they have to / you want them to.... those are the bad blow jobs.

 

I would equate a minute steak to whacking off to a Golden Girls rerun because the internet and TV are out, your wife hasn't had sex with you for 6 months, and this DVD was all you could find under your pile of Hustler magazines.

 

In your scenario, my d1ck is in a girl's mouth. This is generally a good thing.

[shotsup 830]

I know I should not ask this in a BJ thread but what is a minute steak ?

 

Like Steak ' ums ?

[jerryskids 5,169]

I know I should not ask this in a BJ thread but what is a minute steak ?

 

Like Steak ' ums ?

 

That was my thinking.

[listen2me 23 1,531]

gums ?

[WhiteWonder 2,171]

In your scenario, my d1ck is in a girl's mouth. This is generally a good thing.

 

this is stating the obvious. If we always stopped at the obvious, this board wouldnt be much fun.

 

I'm not saying the act of dick in girls mouth is not a general positive..... but I think we can all agree there are varying degrees of positive. We've all had amazing blowjobs (or maybe not) and we've all had poor blow jobs. It's still a positive, but you're thinking "wow, you're really bad at this huh?"

 

I think we can break it down a little more than "derp, my dicks in her mouf so its great!, derp". but I get the natural reaction to say I'm a guy and all blowjobs are blowjobs and are great!

[WhiteWonder 2,171]

I know I should not ask this in a BJ thread but what is a minute steak ?

 

Like Steak ' ums ?

 

yes. I chose minute steak over steak ums hoping someone would make a minute man joke.

[DonS 3,063]

 

yes. I chose minute steak over steak ums hoping someone would make a minute man joke.

Too bad they don't sell 30 second man.

[WhiteWonder 2,171]

it's like sex. I know you've all focked a dead fish that just laid there before. Sure, it was sex and you finished and all but it was comparatively bad sex and you told all your buddies about how bad she was.

[jerryskids 5,169]

 

this is stating the obvious. If we always stopped at the obvious, this board wouldnt be much fun.

 

I'm not saying the act of dick in girls mouth is not a general positive..... but I think we can all agree there are varying degrees of positive. We've all had amazing blowjobs (or maybe not) and we've all had poor blow jobs. It's still a positive, but you're thinking "wow, you're really bad at this huh?"

 

I think we can break it down a little more than "derp, my dicks in her mouf so its great!, derp". but I get the natural reaction to say I'm a guy and all blowjobs are blowjobs and are great!

 

Yeah, enthusiasm is key to a "better" BJ as you mentioned. So where do you want to take this thread?

[shotsup 830]

 

yes. I chose minute steak over steak ums hoping someone would make a minute man joke.

I was going to but I was more concerned to know what it was then make a joke.

[frank 2,144]

Like with a sausage?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Get it? Wurst? That's funny. I'm funny.

[WhiteWonder 2,171]

 

Yeah, enthusiasm is key to a "better" BJ as you mentioned. So where do you want to take this thread?

 

maybe the back alley, big boy

[jerryskids 5,169]

 

maybe the back alley, big boy

 

If you think you can coerce me into sex by complimenting me... you are so right.

 

Anyway, I've been with my wife for 28 years and she loves to give head (as many of you know), so she is by far the best as she has learned exactly what turns me on. In college though there was one girl, I'll call her Sonia because that is her name, who was particularly good at the act. Interestingly, a month or two after I broke up with her she ballooned up to 2 bills, so maybe there is something to this "fatties give good head" theory.

[titans&bucs&bearsohmy! 2,745]

 

If you think you can coerce me into sex by complimenting me... you are so right.

 

Anyway, I've been with my wife for 28 years and she loves to give head (as many of you know), so she is by far the best as she has learned exactly what turns me on. In college though there was one girl, I'll call her Sonia because that is her name, who was particularly good at the act. Interestingly, a month or two after I broke up with her she ballooned up to 2 bills, so maybe there is something to this "fatties give good head" theory.

Best I ever had was a massage girl here in china. Jesus Christ. That girl could suck a golf ball through a garden hose. I made it less than 3 minutes.

 

$36 well spent.

[Gladiators 1,902]

Best I ever had was a massage girl here in china. Jesus Christ. That girl could suck a golf ball through a garden hose. I made it less than 3 minutes.

 

$36 well spent.

And then you got engaged. Amiright?

[jerryskids 5,169]

And then you got engaged. Amiright?

 

Nobody would spend that much money on a Filipina whoore.

 

I kid, I kid...

[WhiteWonder 2,171]

 

Nobody would spend that much money on a Filipina whoore.

 

I kid, I kid...

 

woah now, medstudent still casually visits this place. don't be too mean