mmmmm...beer 691 Posted May 1, 2006 "Maury.... I's 310% sure dat I ain't dat baby daddy!" "When it comes to 2 year old baby Nashotiquia, Lavare, you are NOT the father!" says Maury. She's running off stage with her hands over her face crying and screaming ... he's cheering and laughing with the audience.. dancing around. American televison at it's best! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
George Carlin 1 Posted May 1, 2006 that's only like 3 years old. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mmmmm...beer 691 Posted May 1, 2006 that's only like 3 years old. Yeah... but it never gets old. He still does it every day!! MUahahahahaha!!! My favorite part is that they all say some goofy focked up big number like that mean's it's more.... Maury I's 265% sure that Taunisha's baby ain't mine!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Recidivist 1 Posted May 1, 2006 "Until next time America . . ." Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TheNewGirl 1,026 Posted May 1, 2006 About four years ago, hubby and I watched that show every day. I got a kick out of that stuff, too... "I am sure that he the daddy..." "Wait, it could be like, maybe one of six other guys." All I could think was that meant that the chick had sex with that many people in like a two week time period. That's GROSS. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CurlyNight 0 Posted May 1, 2006 It's refreshing to see how much these daytime talk shows have changed over the years. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mmmmm...beer 691 Posted May 1, 2006 About four years ago, hubby and I watched that show every day. I got a kick out of that stuff, too... "I am sure that he the daddy..." "Wait, it could be like, maybe one of six other guys." All I could think was that meant that the chick had sex with that many people in like a two week time period. That's GROSS. Maury knows what sells baby... he does a show like this every other day. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SUXBNME 1,324 Posted May 1, 2006 About four years ago, hubby and I watched that show every day. I got a kick out of that stuff, too... "I am sure that he the daddy..." "Wait, it could be like, maybe one of six other guys." All I could think was that meant that the chick had sex with that many people in like a two week time period. That's GROSS. Like you have never done that.. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TheNewGirl 1,026 Posted May 1, 2006 Like you have never done that.. For a couple years, I had a new guy about every three to six months...not seven different ones in a two week time period. YUCK. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
brinett9 0 Posted May 1, 2006 Does the audience get to shoot her in the head afterwards? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Electric Mayhem 35 Posted May 1, 2006 Does the audience get to shoot her in the head afterwards? No, they generally like to wait and do it in fromt of the kids. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
brinett9 0 Posted May 1, 2006 How many of these broads even look like they're worth focking? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Electric Mayhem 35 Posted May 1, 2006 How many of these broads even look like they're worth focking? How many of those "daddies" look like they could do better? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shovelheadt 61 Posted May 1, 2006 Best episode I've seen like that was with a 13 year old sitting there blaming one of her mom's ex boyfriends. The dude admitted that he had sex with her but denied the kid was his. Maury says, "You do realize you're in a ton of trouble regardless of how this turns out". Dude..."Yes, but that's not my kid". Girl crying.."It has to be, you're the only person that I've had sex with" Maury....."YOU ARE NOT THE FATHER!!" So the girl runs of crying, Maury and the mother trying to calm her down. So now we fast forward to a new episode where this same girl is accusing a pair of twin brothers, both in high school. Same sh*t in that the 13 year old swears there were no others. Maury - "This is a special situation here because even if the test comes back positive, we'll have to do further tests to narrow it down to the exact sibling" Maury - "NEITHER OF YOU ARE THE FATHER!!" Funniest thing I've seen on daytime television. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Electric Mayhem 35 Posted May 1, 2006 This stuff has got to be fake. Wouldn't the Mom's ex be arrested on teh spot for statutory rape on the spot for doing the 13 year old? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Soilost 28 Posted May 1, 2006 Best episode I've seen like that was with a 13 year old sitting there blaming one of her mom's ex boyfriends. The dude admitted that he had sex with her but denied the kid was his. Maury says, "You do realize you're in a ton of trouble regardless of how this turns out". Dude..."Yes, but that's not my kid". Girl crying.."It has to be, you're the only person that I've had sex with" Maury....."YOU ARE NOT THE FATHER!!" So the girl runs of crying, Maury and the mother trying to calm her down. So now we fast forward to a new episode where this same girl is accusing a pair of twin brothers, both in high school. Same sh*t in that the 13 year old swears there were no others. Maury - "This is a special situation here because even if the test comes back positive, we'll have to do further tests to narrow it down to the exact sibling" Maury - "NEITHER OF YOU ARE THE FATHER!!" Funniest thing I've seen on daytime television. Did any of the protagonists in this story go off to beat a dog to death with a rake? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gocolts 300 Posted May 3, 2006 For a couple years, I had a new guy about every three to six months... :slut: It doesn't get much better than DNA tests on Maury. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
L5UT1ger 0 Posted May 3, 2006 Did any of the protagonists in this story go off to beat a dog to death with a rake? Thanks for that Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest tiki_gods Posted May 3, 2006 Maury Show on mute: (before the test) (results are announced) (Maury consoles) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
itsjjw 0 Posted May 3, 2006 :slut: If guys can be that way, why can't we? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pimptastic69 0 Posted May 3, 2006 My wife used to work for the company that does Maury's DNA tests. What you see on the show isn't even close to some of the sick stories she dealt with. In one case, it turned out that this chick's babydaddies where her brother and her father. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
brinett9 0 Posted May 3, 2006 This stuff has got to be fake. Wouldn't the Mom's ex be arrested on teh spot for statutory rape on the spot for doing the 13 year old? I don't think that dialogue on Maury's show is done under oath. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
swandown 0 Posted May 3, 2006 Dude: Maury, I'm 500% certain I'm not that baby's daddy! Maury: How can you be so sure? Dude: Because I used to have testicular cancer and I had one of my nuts removed!! Maury: That wouldn't stop you from producing sperm. Dude: Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mungwater 588 Posted May 3, 2006 There is some chick on today that is testing her 13th dude. I love watching them sprawl on the floor sobbing and all that.. She should've thought of this before sleeping with that many dudes. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
supermike80 1,285 Posted May 3, 2006 But it is soooo sad to watch the non-father dance around like he won the lottery. She still has a kid dumbfuck.....Not really cool to cheer like that. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shovelheadt 61 Posted May 3, 2006 But it is soooo sad to watch the non-father dance around like he won the lottery. She still has a kid dumbfuck.....Not really cool to cheer like that. That's not his problem. Add to it that he was brought in front of millions and made to look like a deadbeat while the audience yells insults at him. Maybe not cheer, but a nice calm fock you towards the tramp as he walks off stage. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gocolts 300 Posted May 3, 2006 If guys can be that way, why can't we? Did I sat you couldn't be a slut??Be a slut if you want to be,but don't get all defensive when someone points out that having sex with someone new every 3-6 months makes you a slut. That's not his problem. Add to it that he was brought in front of millions and made to look like a deadbeat while the audience yells insults at him. Maybe not cheer, but a nice calm fock you towards the tramp as he walks off stage. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
