I'm gonna admit it

[wiffleball 4,790]

Homos.

 

Actually, that's incorrect. I'm fine with the gay. It's the FLAMING 'mos (FM)

[Not the drink from the Simpsons, you dolt! the real thing].

 

Last night, i get outta work. It's like 8pm, I'm tired, I'm cranky, I just wanna grab a beer, watch a little ball, grab a burger and chillax.

 

Sooo, I stop by the local sports pub. Bar is pretty packed, only one stool left. Fine. I sit. Pretty soon, guy next to me starts yapping at me. Fine. I'm a nice guy. I'll play along for a while. It's obvious he's been drinking. He's on about his six-seventh tall double Rum and Man-Juice. He proceeds to go through about 3 more. He gets progressively more 'animated'. Doesn't take long for me to suspect he's kweer. Again, i don't care. But then he starts touching me more and more. He's not grabbing my johnson, but still, there's only so much incidental contact that's incidental. Yet, I persevere, gamely returning whatever volley of chit-chat he spews my way.

 

A few drinks in, he starts with that flaming gay crap that I can't stand. Basically, being the 'biitch'. Shiit like "Oh, I guess I can't get a drink unless I have a pair of TIITS!". - In that standard gay faaggoty voice. About this time, I'm done. Standard man-bar law, I start very obviously watching TV, not returning his conversation. Most men? Get it. We're done with the focking chit-chat.

 

Not this faag. He announces (to nobody in particular), "I have to go to the bathroom". I say nothing. He waves his hand in front of my face "hellllooooo?". I drop my gaze from the tv, stare right at my drink and say "So focking what? Go. You need my focking permission?" 'Well I, uh, you were, uh...."

 

So FM leaves. At this point, the other side of the bar opens up. I grab a seat there. Should be clear enough. But hell no, pretty soon this FM sits down right next to me (4 stools all open in a row at this point). And starts talking. "hey, why'd you move...." Enough -

 

Me: "Chasing me all over the focking bar is a big focking mistake. May be your last mistake. What's your GD problem?"

FM: "Well (In that 50's B-movie actress way), I THOUGHT you were a nice guy, I guess I was WRONG"

Me: I finally look the guy in the eyes - the first time all night. I never raise my voice. "I want to be real clear here. Fock off and get the FOCK away from me, right now. You understand?"

 

He understood.

 

Man, outta all the types, the 'biitchy faag' is definitely one that gets on my nerves in a focking heartbeat. The drunk biitchy faag is 10 times worse. And, knowing that type, he'll attribute it to 'homophobia'. No, you're just an annoying fock. The fact that you suuck cawk only adds to it.

[GettnHuge 2]

wbiafh

[Snuff 10]

You loved it, adfockingmit it.

[MDC 7,411]

Why do these phaggots keep sucking my cack?

[edjr 6,580]

Why do these phaggots keep sucking my cack?

 

 

you're naked in a gay bar bathroom?

[Birdseed 1]

I bet wiffle's got a purty mouf.

 

[wiffleball 4,790]

Ya know, tragically, I knew I'd get these responses.. Yet I posted anyway.

 

Gotta wonder if Matthew Shepherd was acting like this guy from last night. 'Cause I was pretty tempted to beat this focker and tie him to a fence.

 

...But I sure as hell didn't want to go to Wyoming....

[DuckStupid 40]

Jeebus Christ, you led him on for an hour then left him high and dry. What a b!tch.

[jerryskids 6,792]

Clearly you were sending out signals that his gaydar picked up. Sorry about that.

[rallo 136]

 

Me: "Chasing me all over the focking bar is a big focking mistake. May be your last mistake. What's your GD problem?"

 

 

man... you're a tough guy... were you packin heat?!?!

[Toro 1]

Clearly you were sending out signals that his gaydar picked up. Sorry about that.

 

WINNAH!

[jerryskids 6,792]

man... you're a tough guy... were you packin heat?!?!

I'm sure he was, if you know what I mean. That's why his new boyfriend was so turned on.

[wiffleball 4,790]

....While it didn't go exactly as planned, it WAS nice to finally meet Toro....

[rallo 136]

....While it didn't go exactly as planned, it WAS nice to finally meet Toro....

 

 

geekmeets are a crapshoot

[Toro 1]

....While it didn't go exactly as planned, it WAS nice to finally meet Toro....

 

BWHAHAHAHAHAHA.

[Recidivist 1]

Were you wearing a salmon colored dress shirt?

[Bert 1,128]

Damn dude. Given your bar adventures so far this week you may want to stay home tonight.

[DrJ 0]

Going to a bar by yourself is kinda gay, so I'd say you had it coming...

[parrot 789]

You shoulda just showed him skin tag.

[SmartassBoiler 0]

I'm the guy didn't ask to push in your stool before you sat down. I guess he's not that forward.

[wiffleball 4,790]

Being such an insecure little nine-year-old that you can't handle eating a burger on your own in public because you're so worried about what everone else is thinking about you is pretty gay, but I've accepted it as one of my many inadeqacies.

[DrJ 0]

Hey, if it doesn't bother you to be a raging alcoholic, I guess I don't care either.

[wiffleball 4,790]

Hey, if it doesn't bother you to be a raging alcoholic, I guess I don't either.

 

 

It's no bother at all!

[IGotWorms 4,058]

I been there man. Sometimes its tough being a nice guy. People like that (and I'm not talking just gay dudes, but really any type of person that just goes too far in some sense) assume that just because you are the only person around that doesn't intentionally avoid them like the plague, that you must actually want something to do with them. Pisses me off.

[Cdub100 3,907]

WBIAPT

 

WiffleBall Is A Pr1ck Tease

[rallo 136]

was everyone at this bar wearing assless chaps???

[Riddlen 1]

BWHAHAHAHAHAHA.

stop hating, that was reasonably funny

[wiffleball 4,790]

I been there man. Sometimes its tough being a nice guy. People like that (and I'm not talking just gay dudes, but really any type of person that just goes too far in some sense) assume that just because you are the only person around that doesn't intentionally avoid them like the plague, that you must actually want something to do with them. Pisses me off.

 

 

[football_scooter 0]

I'm fine with the gay.

 

packed, stool

 

He understood.

 

I took the liberty of thinning out your long post to the bare essentials required for you to convey the actual events of your evening at The Blue Oyster.

 

I think that about sums it up right here.

[wiffleball 4,790]

I took the liberty of thinning out your long post to the bare essentials required for you to convey the actual events of your evening at The Blue Oyster.

 

I think that about sums it up right here.

 

 

Nicely done...

[guitarmonkiy 0]

I took the liberty of thinning out your long post to the bare essentials required for you to convey the actual events of your evening at The Blue Oyster.

 

I think that about sums it up right here.

 

 

That one really had me cracking up

[Rusty Syringes 478]

You're always a woman to me.

[naomi 356]

So was he hot?

[Lionsjunkie 1]

....While it didn't go exactly as planned, it WAS nice to finally meet Toro....

 

 

[Patriotsfatboy1 1,432]

I hate you fockers. I get in late to this thread and I had a few things that I figured would be crassic.

 

- Blue Oyster - USED

- assless chaps - USED

- Gaydar signals - USED

 

 

FOCK YOU ALL!

[Eagles Green 34]

Maybe your barstool shouldn't be upside-down. That comes off as ghey.

[Voltaire 5,316]

I told a similar story about three years ago. Same basic thing talking being friendly, they the patting starts. My stomach is curling, I just wanted to get away. This conversation is done, leave me alone. He put his arms around my neck, pulled my head down and kissed me on the nose. It was too much, it made me sick, I just up and left.

 

It was shocking. When I posted the experience, Gettnhuge gave advice and I've never forgotten. He told me I should have punched him in the face. I was a lot bigger and stronger than this guy but violence never occured to me. Iwas just shocked. Damn straight I will -one punch- if it ever happens again.

 

But I don't think it'll happen again. I was so creeped out. I've since decided that the first time they touch me, that's it I'm done. Just shout "Get Away From Me!" a hard push and leave. Don't ignore, don't wind the conversation down, just leave.

[Patriotsfatboy1 1,432]

I told a similar story about three years ago. Same basic thing talking being friendly, they the patting starts. My stomach is curling, I just wanted to get away. This conversation is done, leave me alone. He put his arms around my neck, pulled my head down and kissed me on the nose. It was too much, it made me sick, I just up and left.

 

It was shocking. When I posted the experience, Gettnhuge gave advice and I've never forgotten. He told me I should have punched him in the face. I was a lot bigger and stronger than this guy but violence never occured to me. Iwas just shocked. Damn straight I will -one punch- if it ever happens again.

 

But I don't think it'll happen again. I was so creeped out. I've since decided that the first time they touch me, that's it I'm done. Just shout "Get Away From Me!" a hard push and leave.

 

 

I call BS. Gettnhuge would have told you to take him into the bathroom to suck him off.

 

I have never had a gay guy hit on me. I figure it is either because I am horribly ugly or that I don't come off as gay. I figure that either is equally plausible and I can live with either one of them as being the reason.

 

I also know gay guys (I am talking flaming) and they have never acted this way in my presence. I have a feeling that you just got hit on by one of those crazy gays

[Voltaire 5,316]

I call BS. Gettnhuge would have told you to take him into the bathroom to suck him off.

 

I have never had a gay guy hit on me. I figure it is either because I am horribly ugly or that I don't come off as gay. I figure that either is equally plausible and I can live with either one of them as being the reason.

 

I also know gay guys (I am talking flaming) and they have never acted this way in my presence. I have a feeling that you just got hit on by one of those crazy gays

 

I don't meet too many gays, but it was only this time that I was treated this way. On one other occasion, some guy next to me at a public internet computer was viewing hardcore gay porn. He never said a word and was minding his own business, but it was supremely uncomfortable.

[Boz/BoFan 0]

I don't meet too many gays, but it was only this time that I was treated this way. On one other occasion, some guy next to me at a public internet computer was viewing hardcore gay porn. He never said a word and was minding his own business, but it was supremely uncomfortable.

 

Sorry bout that.