kutulu 1,676 Posted March 6, 2008 "Blow it out your ass, motorcycle man! I am fhe Devil,Do you understand? Just what will you give me for your titties and beer? I suppose you noticed this little contract here, . '' YER GODDAM RIGHT, YOU SON-OF-A-WH0RE, THAT'S ABOUT THE ONLY REASON I LEARNED WRITIN' FOR . . . GIMME THAT PAPER ... BET YER ASS I'LL SIGN . . . 'CAUSE I NEED A BEER, 'N IT'S TITTY- SQUEEZIN' TIME! Titties & Beer, Zappa Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Yer mom 2 Posted March 6, 2008 All that and a great place to get hammered in Vegas: Nibblin' on sponge cake, watchin' the sun bake; All of those tourists covered with oil. Strummin' my six string on my front porch swing. Smell those shrimp They're beginnin' to boil. Wasted away again in Margaritaville, Searchin' for my lost shaker of salt. Some people claim that there's a woman to blame, But I know it's nobody's fault. Don't know the reason, Stayed here all season With nothing to show but this brand new tattoo. But it's a real beauty, A Mexican cutie, how it got here I haven't a clue. Wasted away again in Margaritaville, Searchin' for my lost shaker of salt. Some people claim that there's a woman to blame, Now I think, - hell it could be my fault. I blew out my flip flop, Stepped on a pop top, Cut my heel, had to cruise on back home. But there's booze in the blender, And soon it will render That frozen concoction that helps me hang on. Wasted away again in Margaritaville Searchin' for my lost shaker of salt. Some people claim that there's a woman to blame, But I know, it's my own damn fault. Yes, and some people claim that there's a woman to blame And I know it's my own damn fault. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bert 1,128 Posted March 6, 2008 Merle Haggard I Think I'll Just Stay Here And Drink Could be holding you tonight, Could quit doing wrong, start doin' right. You don't care about what I think. I think I'll just stay here and drink. Hey puttin' you down don't square no deal. Least you know the way I feel. Take all the money in the bank. Think 'll just stay here and drink. Listen close and you can hear, That loud jukebox playin' in my ear. Ain't no woman gonna change the way I think. Think 'll just stay here and drink. Hurtin' me now don't mean a thing. Since lovin' you, don't feel no pain. My mind ain't nothin' but a total blank. I think I'll just stay here and drink, yeah. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kutulu 1,676 Posted March 7, 2008 Lace and Whiskey, Alice Cooper Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Barnaby Wilde 0 Posted March 7, 2008 G&R Nightrain Loaded like a freight train Flyin' like an aeroplane Feelin' like a space brain One more time tonight Well I'm a west coast struttin' One bad mother Got a rattlesnake suitcase Under my arm Said I'm a mean machine Been drinkin' gasoline And honey you can make my motor hum Well I got one chance left In a nine live cat I got a dog eat dog sly smile I got a Molotov cocktail with a match to go I smoke my cigarette with style An I can tell you honey You can make my money tonight Wake up late honey put on your clothes Take your credit card to the liquor store That's one for you and two for me by tonight I'll be loaded like a freight train Flyin' like an aeroplane Feelin' like a space brain One more time tonight I'm on the nightrain Bottoms up I'm on the nightrain Fill my cup I'm on the nightrain Ready to crash and burn I never learn I'm on the nightrain I love that stuff I'm on the nightrain I can never get enough I'm on the nightrain Never to return - no Loaded like a freight train Flyin' like an aeroplane Speedin' like a space brain One more time tonight I'm on the nightrain And I'm lookin' for some I'm on the nightrain So's I can leave this slum I'm on the nightrain And I'm ready to crash an' burn Nightrain Bottoms up I'm on the nightrain Fill my cup I'm on the nightrain Whoa yeah I'm on the nightrain Love that stuff I'm on the nightrain An I can never get enough Ridin' the nightrain I guess I I guess, I guess, I guess I never learn On the nightrain Float me home Ooh I'm on the nightrain Ridin' the nightrain Never to return Nightrain Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bert 1,128 Posted March 7, 2008 Whiskey, gin and brandy With a glass I'm pretty handy I'm trying to walk a straight line On sour mash and cheap wine So join me for a drink boys We're gonna make a big noise So don't worry about tomorrow Take it today Forget about the tip We'll get hell to pay Have a drink on me Have a drink on me Yeah Have a drink on me Have a drink on me On me Come on Dizzy, drunk and fightin' On tequila white lightnin' My glass is getting shorter On whiskey, ice and water So come on and have a good time And get blinded out of your mind So don't worry about tomorrow Take it today Forget about the cheque We'll get hell to pay Have a drink on me Have a drink on me Have a drink on me Have a drink on me On me Get stoned Have a drink on me Have a drink on me Yeah Have a drink on me Come on Oooh Gonna roll around Gonna hit the ground Take another swing Have another drink Gonna drink it dry Gonna get me high Come on all the boys Make a noise CHORUS Have a drink on me Have a drink on me Have a drink on me Have a drink on me Have a drink on me Have a drink on me Have a drink on me Have a drink on me Have a drink oooooooon me Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kutulu 1,676 Posted March 7, 2008 Whiskey, gin and brandyWith a glass I'm pretty handy I'm trying to walk a straight line On sour mash and cheap wine So join me for a drink boys We're gonna make a big noise So don't worry about tomorrow Take it today Forget about the tip We'll get hell to pay Have a drink on me Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Super Cubs 154 Posted March 7, 2008 I just going to go with the last verse of a perfect country and western song. And I felt obliged to include it on this thread. The last verse goes like this here. Well, I was drunk the day my Mom got outta prison. And I went to pick her up in the rain. But, before I could get to the station in my pickup truck She got runned over by a damned old train. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kutulu 1,676 Posted March 7, 2008 (Pissing the night away, pissing the night away)He drinks a Whiskey drink, he drinks a Vodka drink He drinks a Lager drink, he drinks a Cider drink He sings the songs that remind him of the good times He sings the songs that remind him of the better times (Oh Danny Boy, Danny Boy, Danny Boy) Tubthumping, Chumbawamba Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Brown Eyed Girl 1 Posted March 7, 2008 She said, 'Well I think that you're headed for a whole lot of trouble... Yeah I think that you're headed for a whole lot of trouble... Hey yeeah, you know that you're headed for a whole lot of trouble... If you ... Take Your Whisky Home' Van Halen Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kutulu 1,676 Posted March 7, 2008 And the answers always waiting at the liquor store, 40 oz to Freedom, so I'll take that walk. ~Sublime Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Vince44 205 Posted March 7, 2008 Party Hardy Rock and Roll Drink a Keg Smoke a Bowl I'm a stoner I've got class Fock with my sh!t I'll kick your ass Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Yer mom 2 Posted March 7, 2008 And the answers always waiting at the liquor store, 40 oz to Freedom, so I'll take that walk. ~Sublime Puts me in a good mood just reading that, timeless music to me. Also reminds me that summers just around the corner Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kutulu 1,676 Posted March 8, 2008 Also reminds me that summers just around the corner Yeah, it does. Well I've been lying awake all night just thinking of youBut a bottle of whiskey lies heavy obstructing my view I've got a bottle of pills to give me my thrills And I know that I'm leading a life that kills Wasted Live 1983 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
itsbigmoni 1 Posted March 8, 2008 Willie Nelson/Johnny Cash Well I gotta get drunk and I sure do dread it cause I know just what I'm gonna do I'll start to spend my money call evrybody honey and wind up singing the blues I'll spend my whole paycheck on some old wreck and brother I can name you a few But I gotta get drunk and I sure do dread it cause I know just what I'm gonna do I gotta get drunk I just can't stay sober there's a lot of good people in town Who'd like to hear me holler see me spend my dollars And I wouldn't think of lettin' 'em down There's a lot of doctors that tell me that I'd better start slowin' it down But there's more old drunkers than there are old doctors So I guess we'd better have another round Well now I gotta get drunk... [ steel ] Well I gotta get drunk... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kutulu 1,676 Posted March 8, 2008 If you see me walkin down the line With my favrite honky tonk in mind, Well, Ill be here around suppertime With my can of dinner and a bunch of fine Beer Drinkers & Hell Raisers, ZZ Top <---------- Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kutulu 1,676 Posted March 9, 2008 Champagne & Reefer by Muddy Waters Yeah bring me champagne when I'm thirsty. Bring me reefer when I want to get high. Yeah bring me champagne when I'm thirsty. Bring me reefer when I want to get high. Well you know when I'm lonely Bring my woman set her right down here by my side. Well you know there should be no law on people that want to smoke a little dope. Well you know there should be no law on people that want to smoke a little dope. Well you know it's good for your head And it relax your body don't you know. Everytime I get high I lay my head down on my baby's breast. Well you know I lay down be quiet Tryin' to take my rest. Well you know she done hug and kiss me Says Muddy your one man that I love the best. I'm gonna get high Gonna get high just as sure as you know my name. Y'know I'm gonna get so high this morning It's going to be a cryin' shame. Well you know I'm gonna stick with my reefer Ain't gonna be messin' round with no cocaine. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kutulu 1,676 Posted March 19, 2008 Puts me in a good mood just reading that, timeless music to me. Also reminds me that summers just around the corner I SMOKE TWO JOINTS!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kutulu 1,676 Posted March 21, 2008 Mama Told Me (Not to Come) Want some whiskey in your water Sugar in your tea What's all these crazy questions they askin' me This is the craziest party there could ever be Don't turn on the lights, 'cause I don't want to see The radio is blastin' Someone's knocking at the door I'm lookin' at my girlfriend She's passed out on the floor Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
remote controller 143 Posted March 21, 2008 "If you like Pina Coladas" Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kutulu 1,676 Posted April 2, 2008 Whiskey bottles, and brand new cars Oak tree you're in my way There's too much coke and too much smoke Look what's going on inside you Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bert 1,128 Posted April 2, 2008 Sweet talkin' people done ran me out of town I drank enough whiskey to float a battleship around But I'm leavin' this game one step ahead of you And you will not hear me cry 'cause I do not sing the blues Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kutulu 1,676 Posted April 18, 2008 We started drinking Wasn`t thinking too straight She was doing eighty and She slammed on the brakes Got so high, we had To pull to the side We did some shaking Til the middle of the night Shaking (Oh, oh, oh, oh) Snapping her fingers (Oh, oh, oh, oh) She was up and down (Oh, oh, oh, oh) And round and round Shaking (Oh, oh, oh, oh) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bert 1,128 Posted April 18, 2008 took off for a weekend last month Just to try and recall the whole year. All of the faces and all of the places, wonderin' where they all disappeared. I didn't ponder the question too long; I was hungry and went out for a bite. Ran into a chum with a bottle of rum, and we wound up drinkin' all night. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kutulu 1,676 Posted May 2, 2008 I'm not sure if there's a point to this story But I'm going to tell it again So many other people try to tell the tale Not one of them knows the end It was a funk-house in South Carolina Danced a boy the age of ten Along with his little brother Billy And a mother and her father too Who was a triple loser with some blue tattoos That were given to him when he was drunk And a drunk temper that was easy to lose And thank god he didn't dance the funk Well, Billy woke up in the back of his truck Took a minute to open his eyes He took a peep into the back of the house And found himself a big surprise He didn't see his brother but there was his mother With her red-headed head in her hands While the boyfriend had his gloves wrapped around an old priest Trying to choke the man Ah Ah Ahhh... Billy looked up from the window to the truck Threw up, and had to struggle to stand He saw that red-necked bastard with a hammer Turn the priest into a shell of a man The priest was putting up the fight of his life But he was old and he was bound to lose The boyfriend hit as hard as he could And knocked the priest right down to his shoes Well, now Billy knew but never actually met The preacher lying there in the room He heard himself say, "That must be my daddy" Then he knew what he was gonna do Billy got up enough courage, took it up And grabbed the first blunt thing he could find It was a cold, glass bottle of milk That got delivered every morning at nine Ah Ah Ahhh... Billy broke in and saw the blood on the floor, and He turned around and put the lock on the door He looked dead into the boyfriend's eye His mother was a ghost, too upset to cry, then He took a step toward the man on the ground From his mouth trickled out a little audible sound He heard the boyfriend shout, "Get out!" And Billy said, "Not till I know what this is all about" "Well, this preacher here was attacking your mama" But Billy knew just who was starting the drama So Billy took dead aim at his face And smashed the bottle on the man who left his dad in disgrace, and The white milk dripped down with the blood, and the Boyfriend fell down dead for good Right next to the preacher who was gasping for air And Billy shouted, "Daddy, why'd you have to come back here?" His mama reached behind the sugar and honey, and Pulled out an envelope filled with money "Your daddy gave us this," she collapsed in tears "He's been paying all the bills for years" "Mama, let's put this body underneath the trees and put Daddy in the truck and head to Tennessee" Just then, his little brother came in Holding the milk man's hat and a bottle of gin singing, La la la la, la la la la, yeah La la la la, la la la la, yeah La la la la, la la la la, yeah La la la, la la la... La la la la, la la la la, yeah La la la la, la la la la, yeah La la la la, la la la la, yeah La la la, la la la... La la la la, la la la la, yeah La la la la, la la la la, yeah La la la la, la la la la, yeah La la la la, la la la la, yeah Well now you heard another side to the story But you wanna know how it ends? If you must know, the truth about the tale Go and ask the milkman Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kutulu 1,676 Posted May 12, 2008 If You Don't Start Drinkin' I'm tired of putting up With your sober wit Tired of looking at you Through an alcoholic haze You better change I'm begging you please Cuz if you don't start drinkin' I'm gonna leave I wake up in the morning I'm under the roof But I get no sympathy Baby you're too aloof You better change Yes, I'm begging you please Cuz if you don't start drinkin' I'm gonna leave Budweiser, budweiser, miller lite Take a little nip baby it's alright All a fellow wants is company Come on baby have a taste with me Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
KSB2424 3,148 Posted May 12, 2008 I don't know who is worse. Giants Fan or kutulu. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kutulu 1,676 Posted May 12, 2008 I don't know who is worse. Giants Fan or kutulu. That's cold. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
OD99 0 Posted May 12, 2008 First the painfully obvious: 99 bottles of beer on the wall Then, an oldie but a goodie... Irish Rovers - Wasn't That A Party: Coulda been the Whisky Mighta been the Gin Coulda have been the 3 or 4 six packs I don't know but look at the mess I'm in My heads like a football I think I'm gunna die! Tellin me oh me oh my Wasn't that a party! Someone took the grapefruit And wore it like a hat I saw someone under my kitchen table Talkin to my old tom cat They were talkin 'bout hockey The cat was talkin back! I longed about the bed And everything went black Oh wasn't that a party! I'm sure it's just my memory Playin tricks on me LyricsBut I thought I saw my buddy Cutting down my neighbors tree Coulda been the Whisky Mighta been the Gin Coulda have been the 3 or 4 six packs I don't know but look at the mess I'm in My heads like a football I think I'm gunna die! Tellin me oh me oh my Wasn't that a party! Billy Joe and Tommy Well they went a little far They were sitting in the backyard Pulling on the sirens from Sombodys police car So you see your honor It was all in fun A little bit of drag meet down on Main street boys just to See if the cops could run Well they brought us in to see you In a alcoholic haze I should have just used those 30 days To recover from the party Coulda been the Whisky Mighta been the Gin Coulda have been the 3 or 4 six packs I don't know but look at the mess I'm in My heads like a football I think I'm gunna die! Tellin me oh me oh my Wasn't that a party! Coulda been the Whisky Mighta been the Gin Coulda have been the 3 or 4 six packs I don't know but look at the mess I'm in My heads like a football I think I'm gunna die! Tellin me oh me oh my Wasn't that a party! Wasn't that a party! Wasn't that a party! Wasn't that a party! Wasn't that a party! What a party! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bert 1,128 Posted May 12, 2008 First the painfully obvious: 99 bottles of beer on the wall Then, an oldie but a goodie... Irish Rovers - Wasn't That A Party: Coulda been the Whisky Mighta been the Gin Coulda have been the 3 or 4 six packs I don't know but look at the mess I'm in My heads like a football I think I'm gunna die! Tellin me oh me oh my Wasn't that a party! Someone took the grapefruit And wore it like a hat I saw someone under my kitchen table Talkin to my old tom cat They were talkin 'bout hockey The cat was talkin back! I longed about the bed Long about then everything went black And everything went black Oh wasn't that a party! I'm sure it's just my memory Playin tricks on me LyricsBut I thought I saw my buddy Cutting down my neighbors tree Coulda been the Whisky Mighta been the Gin Coulda have been the 3 or 4 six packs I don't know but look at the mess I'm in My heads like a football I think I'm gunna die! Tellin me oh me oh my Wasn't that a party! Billy Joe and Tommy Well they went a little far They were sitting in the backyardThey were sitting in my backyard Pulling on the sirens fromblowing on the siren in Sombodys police car So you see your honor It was all in fun A little bit of drag meet down onThat little bitty track meet down on main street Main street boys just to See if the cops could runWas just to see if the cops could run Well they brought us in to see youWell, they run us in to see you In a alcoholic haze I should have just used those 30 daysI can sure use those thirty days To recover from the party Coulda been the Whisky Mighta been the Gin Coulda have been the 3 or 4 six packs I don't know but look at the mess I'm in My heads like a football I think I'm gunna die! Tellin me oh me oh my Wasn't that a party! Coulda been the Whisky Mighta been the Gin Coulda have been the 3 or 4 six packs I don't know but look at the mess I'm in My heads like a football I think I'm gunna die! Tellin me oh me oh my Wasn't that a party! Wasn't that a party! Wasn't that a party! Wasn't that a party! Wasn't that a party! What a party! It would have been a great post if the lyrics were correct. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Savage Beast 1 Posted May 12, 2008 Alcohaulin Ass by Hellyeah music video link http://www.hellyeahrocks.com/news.html Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Gepetto 1,368 Posted May 13, 2008 IN HEAVEN THERE IS NO BEER disclaimer: I couldn't find the orignal so these will have to do.... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kutulu 1,676 Posted May 29, 2008 Follow me into the desert As thirsty as you are Crack a smile and cut your mouth And drown in alcohol Cause down below the truth is lying Beneath the riverbed So quench yourself and drink the water That flows below her head Burden In My Hand, Soundgarden Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Flashover 0 Posted May 29, 2008 One bourbon One scotch And one beer Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
