Relationship question

[DanXIII 8]

I was home this weekend and I got together with my best friend from high school who's in the military. We were having a few drinks and he told me about a problem he was having with his girlfriend. I told him what I thought, but I wanted to get the collective "wisdom" of the Geek Bored to see who agrees with me.

 

My buddy is in the Army. He is currently stationed in Ft Lewis, WA and his girlfriend lives in another state. From time to time she sends him naughty pics of her, to show him how much she cares or whatever. Anyway, she was online one night last week chatting with an old boyfriend from high school and, in a moment of "drunken weakness" (her words, according to him) she sent this old boyfriend a couple of those pics. She claims they were just bra & panty pics, nothing more revealing than that. My friend asked me what I thought he should do, and I told him. He really loves this chick (apparently) and she claims to be extremely sorry about it. She also claims that told him about it because she felt guilty and didn't want any secrets between them; had she not said anything, he probably never would have known. To his knowledge she has never done anything like this before, and she swears she won't again. She has even asked me to intervene on her behalf to try to smooth things over between them.

 

Anyway, what do you say? Should he forgive her or dump her?

[GettnHuge 1]

hrm getting drunk and sending a non-nude pic she is obviously proud of to an old bf...ok whatever.

I can just smell all the red flags beyond that. walk

[Me_2006 14]

I'm gonna need to see these pictures to make the proper decision.

[Strike 3,968]

Guilt trip her in to anal, then dump her after she licks her poop off his ****.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Okay seriously, if he loves her and trusts her he should believe her and give her a mulligan on the condition that it never happen again.

[Chronic Husker 85]

I was home this weekend and I got together with my best friend from high school who's in the military. We were having a few drinks and he told me about a problem he was having with his girlfriend. I told him what I thought, but I wanted to get the collective "wisdom" of the Geek Bored to see who agrees with me.

 

My buddy is in the Army. He is currently stationed in Ft Lewis, WA and his girlfriend lives in another state. From time to time she sends him naughty pics of her, to show him how much she cares or whatever. Anyway, she was online one night last week chatting with an old boyfriend from high school and, in a moment of "drunken weakness" (her words, according to him) she sent this old boyfriend a couple of those pics. She claims they were just bra & panty pics, nothing more revealing than that. My friend asked me what I thought he should do, and I told him. He really loves this chick (apparently) and she claims to be extremely sorry about it. She also claims that told him about it because she felt guilty and didn't want any secrets between them; had she not said anything, he probably never would have known. To his knowledge she has never done anything like this before, and she swears she won't again. She has even asked me to intervene on her behalf to try to smooth things over between them.

 

Anyway, what do you say? Should he forgive her or dump her?

 

I wouldn't think too much of it. Your story doesn't give too much more than of a glimpse into their relationship. Although I wouldn't say the pic sending is harmless, IMO it isn't a deal-breaker. Especially since she came out and told him about it. I guess I wonder if the relationship has other "issues" since she did the pic sending in the first place (drunk, or not).

[NorthernVike 2,080]

He needs to test her. Send her camping with a guy named steve.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I know, wrong focking bored, but you get the drift.

[JackARoot 2]

"A moment of drunken weeknes" I call BS

 

It's a classic female emotional manipulation move. She is just testing him to see what reaction she gets. All women test their men, and it never stops. He could trade her in for a different woman, but the new woman will still test him. I try to look at a woman like the sea. Sometimes its calm, sometimes its stormy. Getting mad at the storm won't stop it.

 

I don't know that theres much to advise him to do, other than man-up and get used to it, or become celebate.

[Cruzer 1,992]

Never been a fan of the out-of-state relationship. I guess they work for some. But I think those that it does are pretty tore up, have extremely hard time finding ass, and otherwise feel lucky to have what they have.

[KSB2424 3,083]

Not that big of a deal to send a bra/panty pic. Not that big of a deal to be "chatting up" with an old boyfriend. However the two coupled together is a red flag. It's one thing to catch up with old friends (even ex's), but if you are willing to send a pic like that, then there is a sexual nature to the conversation and/or online relationship with that dude.

 

If this broad is really serious about your friend she woudn't do stuff like that. She just wouldn't. It's not a dealbreaker, but it's strike one. :umpirestrikesign:

[TylerRoseFan 16]

Not that big of a deal to send a bra/panty pic. Not that big of a deal to be "chatting up" with an old boyfriend. However the two coupled together is a red flag. It's one thing to catch up with old friends (even ex's), but if you are willing to send a pic like that, then there is a sexual nature to the conversation and/or online relationship with that dude.

 

If this broad is really serious about your friend she woudn't do stuff like that. She just wouldn't. It's not a dealbreaker, but it's strike one. :umpirestrikesign:

If they are serious about their relationship, then yes. It is a HUGE deal. Trust. Trust. Trust.

[DanXIII 8]

"A moment of drunken weeknes" I call BS

 

It's a classic female emotional manipulation move. She is just testing him to see what reaction she gets. All women test their men, and it never stops. He could trade her in for a different woman, but the new woman will still test him. I try to look at a woman like the sea. Sometimes its calm, sometimes its stormy. Getting mad at the storm won't stop it.

 

I don't know that theres much to advise him to do, other than man-up and get used to it, or become celebate.

 

This most closely mirrors my own advice to him.

[DankNuggs 305]

Skank-dar beeping loudly...

 

Get away, things are good and she is pulling this... Think about what a moment of weakness would bring...

[RLLD 3,455]

Did he try hitting her?

[TimmySmith 2,782]

Sounds like she's ready to be whored out. Your Army buddy is going to make alot of money.

[surferskin 30]

Living in a military town myself, I'd advise him to not get serious with any chick until he's stationed somewhere for long period time or gets out. It's hard enough to keep relationships going when your not hundreds to thousands miles apart for months at a time. The cheating on both sides is rampant.

[heavy-set 39]

depends on how many options he has. if he can get laid on a regular basis, fock her one last time, spooge in her hair and leave.

if he cant get action, stay and just write it off.

[heavy-set 39]

Never been a fan of the out-of-state relationship. I guess they work for some. But I think those that it does are pretty tore up, have extremely hard time finding ass, and otherwise feel lucky to have what they have.

they never work. females need attention, if you dont give it to them, someone else will.

out of sight , out of mind. then one day you come home and shes ass up face down on the kitchen floor

[TD Ryan2 314]

he needs to live in this girl's zip code for some time before making any decisions about her at all.

Is this a deal breaker? hell no because what "deal" are they breaking exactly? the one where they never see each other?

 

long distance relationships are garbage.

It's one thing if a married/established couple has to live apart temporarily for work/career reasons... that's difficult but a strong relationship can survive it... but for some dating couple to be "long distance" at the get-go... forget it.

 

The problem with long distance is that those involved do not deal with each other's daily bullshiat... they really have no idea *if* the other person drives them crazy or not.

The distance and lack of day-to-day contact allows them to create this perfect idea of one another in their heads... then once they're living day to day together, they realize, "he leaves the seat up", "she's a complete biatch once a month", "he won't watch The Bachelor with me", "she thinks money grows on trees"....

[RLLD 3,455]

they never work. females need attention, if you dont give it to them, someone else will.

out of sight , out of mind. then one day you come home and shes ass up face down on the kitchen floor

 

he could just buy her a vibrator, or a dog....

[JackARoot 2]

he needs to live in this girl's zip code for some time before making any decisions about her at all.

Is this a deal breaker? hell no because what "deal" are they breaking exactly? the one where they never see each other?

 

long distance relationships are garbage.

It's one thing if a married/established couple has to live apart temporarily for work/career reasons... that's difficult but a strong relationship can survive it... but for some dating couple to be "long distance" at the get-go... forget it.

 

The problem with long distance is that those involved do not deal with each other's daily bullshiat... they really have no idea *if* the other person drives them crazy or not.

The distance and lack of day-to-day contact allows them to create this perfect idea of one another in their heads... then once they're living day to day together, they realize, "he leaves the seat up", "she's a complete biatch once a month", "he won't watch The Bachelor with me", "she thinks money grows on trees"....

 

Very sound advice. She sitting there thinking "Hmmmm, he doesn't have to deal with any of my shiot. I wonder how he'll deal with it when I manufacture some shiot? Can he handle it?"

 

I question whether she actually ever had the chat with her ex. Maybe she's just trying to make him jealous to set-up a nice grudge fock on their next meeting.

[Me_2006 14]

What self-respecting grown man has a long distance relationship?

[heavy-set 39]

he could just buy her a vibrator, or a dog....

the vibe could work, but she just might end up taking more pics, or web caming herself with the vibe hanging from differnt orfices

 

no go on the dog too. she will take it to a park for a walk and attract guys with it.

 

the only way to keep a gal is to have her barefoot and preggers. she aint goin nowhere then. no guy wants a lil kid running around the house. he has to be a father and less time to bang

[MDC 5,890]

I was home this weekend and I got together with my best friend from high school who's in the military. We were having a few drinks and he told me about a problem he was having with his girlfriend. I told him what I thought, but I wanted to get the collective "wisdom" of the Geek Bored to see who agrees with me.

 

My buddy is in the Army. He is currently stationed in Ft Lewis, WA and his girlfriend lives in another state. From time to time she sends him naughty pics of her, to show him how much she cares or whatever. Anyway, she was online one night last week chatting with an old boyfriend from high school and, in a moment of "drunken weakness" (her words, according to him) she sent this old boyfriend a couple of those pics. She claims they were just bra & panty pics, nothing more revealing than that. My friend asked me what I thought he should do, and I told him. He really loves this chick (apparently) and she claims to be extremely sorry about it. She also claims that told him about it because she felt guilty and didn't want any secrets between them; had she not said anything, he probably never would have known. To his knowledge she has never done anything like this before, and she swears she won't again. She has even asked me to intervene on her behalf to try to smooth things over between them.

 

Anyway, what do you say? Should he forgive her or dump her?

 

I don't believe it was a "moment of drunken weariness," which makes it sound like she *whoops!* accidently sent the pics. I think she sent them in a moment of horniness and bad judgment and then regret it. I also think the kind of girl who does that sort of thing is going to be much more likely to have similar "accidents" in the future if she sees that there are no consequences, so long as she cries and acts upset about it.

 

Personally, I'd dump her. Given that your friend is really conflicted about this, I'd just listen to what he has to say and support his decision. He's going to do whatever he'll do anyway, so there's no point in getting in the middle of it. He'll learn, probably he hard way.

[Me_2006 14]

I don't believe it was a "moment of drunken weariness," which makes it sound like she *whoops!* accidently sent the pics. I think she sent them in a moment of horniness and bad judgment and then regret it. I also think the kind of girl who does that sort of thing is going to be much more likely to have similar "accidents" in the future if she sees that there are no consequences, so long as she cries and acts upset about it.

 

Personally, I'd dump her. Given that your friend is really conflicted about this, I'd just listen to what he has to say and support his decision. He's going to do whatever he'll do anyway, so there's no point in getting in the middle of it. He'll learn, probably he hard way.

Agree 100%.

 

 

Any guy that has to ask advice here isn't going to dump her anyway. From the story you relayed to us, he was making excuses for her already. She was drunk. She never does this kind of thing. She's sorry. Blah blah blah.

 

He's gonna forgive her and tell you and anyone else that "You dont know the whole story" or some weak ish like that. And it'll happen again.

[peenie 1,690]

i'm a woman and it is my opinion that she is lonely and although she doesn't know it yet, this is the first step before she cheats on him. just my 2 cents.

[gocolts 300]

I don't believe it was a "moment of drunken weariness," which makes it sound like she *whoops!* accidently sent the pics. I think she sent them in a moment of horniness and bad judgment and then regret it. I also think the kind of girl who does that sort of thing is going to be much more likely to have similar "accidents" in the future if she sees that there are no consequences, so long as she cries and acts upset about it.

 

Personally, I'd dump her. Given that your friend is really conflicted about this, I'd just listen to what he has to say and support his decision. He's going to do whatever he'll do anyway, so there's no point in getting in the middle of it. He'll learn, probably he hard way.

This.

 

If you give him advice, you will end up the bad guy when they stay/get back together.

[jets24 6]

Really? It took this long for the proper geek response?

 

I can't help with this question without ..................

 

 

 

 

 

CAN SIZE?

[DanXIII 8]

Agree 100%.

 

 

Any guy that has to ask advice here isn't going to dump her anyway. From the story you relayed to us, he was making excuses for her already. She was drunk. She never does this kind of thing. She's sorry. Blah blah blah.

 

He's gonna forgive her and tell you and anyone else that "You dont know the whole story" or some weak ish like that. And it'll happen again.

 

Ahh I didn't consider this but you may be right!

[titans&bucs&bearsohmy! 2,745]

Guilt trip her in to anal, then dump her after she licks her poop off his ****.

 

I gotta say, like the blind squirrel and the acorn, Strike actually got this right for once. Of course, then he gave a recanted pvssy response. Dude is in the military, long distance is b.s., hit it, quit it, find another.

[MDC 5,890]

This.

 

If you give him advice, you will end up the bad guy when they stay/get back together.

 

I had a similar situation not long ago.

 

My brother-in-law is dating a girl who's originally from Chile. She wet there with her family last summer and when she got back, she'd left her Facebook account open on his computer and he found messages to some Chilean guy saying that she loves him, etc. This girl swears she didn't sleep with the guy and "accidently" got wrapped up in being back in Chile, blah blah. My wife and I took the BIL out to commiserate and it was so obvious he loves this woman and wanted so bad to believe her. I just nodded and smiled, said "good luck!" Later on my wife asked if I believed the girlfriend's story. "Fock no! But your brother obviously wants to, so there's no point in trashing the girlfriend and making things awkward."

 

A year later and they're still together. I think the girl is a frigging wh0re but my brother-in-law needs to learn the hard way.

 

If Dan trashes the buddy's girl he's going to regret it - just let it go.

[rholio 339]

i'm a woman and it is my opinion that she is lonely and although she doesn't know it yet, this is the first step before she cheats on him. just my 2 cents.

 

 

Short, sweet, and to the point.

[gocolts 300]

I had a similar situation not long ago.

 

My brother-in-law is dating a girl who's originally from Chile. She wet there with her family last summer and when she got back, she'd left her Facebook account open on his computer and he found messages to some Chilean guy saying that she loves him, etc. This girl swears she didn't sleep with the guy and "accidently" got wrapped up in being back in Chile, blah blah. My wife and I took the BIL out to commiserate and it was so obvious he loves this woman and wanted so bad to believe her. I just nodded and smiled, said "good luck!" Later on my wife asked if I believed the girlfriend's story. "Fock no! But your brother obviously wants to, so there's no point in trashing the girlfriend and making things awkward."

 

A year later and they're still together. I think the girl is a frigging wh0re but my brother-in-law needs to learn the hard way.

 

If Dan trashes the buddy's girl he's going to regret it - just let it go.

Fock yeah he will. Dan has a decision to make. If he is honest, he should take into consideration that this will likely end the friendship, at the very least how it is now.

 

Funny/sad story that somewhat relates to this. My ex wife has broke up with her boyfriend at least 12 times inside of 8 months. The last 5 times, there was no way in hell she was letting him come back. She even filed a restraining order on him and he was back in a week. This guy calls my ex wife a fat b1tch in front of my son. He has even stolen money and her prescription medicine. The sad part is that this is the example for my son of a relationship, as dysfunctional as it is.

[gocolts 300]

i'm a woman and it is my opinion that she is lonely and although she doesn't know it yet, this is the first step before she cheats on him. just my 2 cents.

More than likely this is correct as well.

 

BTW, did the bored ever figure out who stole peenie's password???

[TylerRoseFan 16]

Living in a military town myself, I'd advise him to not get serious with any chick until he's stationed somewhere for long period time or gets out. It's hard enough to keep relationships going when your not hundreds to thousands miles apart for months at a time. The cheating on both sides is rampant.

 

 

Which military town? I live near Fort Polk.

[Brad GLuckman 518]

She's a whore. A dirty filthy whore. He is setting a precedent by staying with her. He might as well just cut his balls off and put them in a little jar for her to wear around her neck as a trophy.

[surferskin 30]

Which military town? I live near Fort Polk.

Va.Beach/Norfolk