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kilroy69

Are you happy?

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I am 43 and I am starting to have things fall into place for me but I can't really say I am happy. I have things that make me happy. My son. Fishing. Banging women. However they all are temporary. My son is gone 3-4 days a week.  I only fish half the year.  I enjoy women and I am seeing a new one that seems pretty cool. I just feel like I am missing something.

I was thinking maybe a hobby? Like collecting watches. Maybe painting? I have come a LONG way in the last 5 years and I feel like I should be happier than I am. 

Anyone else feel this way? 

 

I know. Rats asss. 

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That's the thing with happy. It is elusive. It's a drug. Once you get a dose, the next time you need more. 

Five years ago, I was miserable. Like borderline suicidal. Changed it up. Moved here. My dream was to travel. 

The last four years have easily been the best of my life. I've been to 15 new countries, with more on the books. Met a hot, yet sweet as she can be wife.

Am I happy? Comparatively sure. But the things that seemed so wonderful not so long ago are no longer as shiny as they once were. 

I turn 40 next month. Minor health issues beginning to pile up. Kind of doing a midlife crisis thing myself.

I think a lot of "happy" is just learning to be content with the small things. I dunno. 

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Oh yea. The key is to not get into a routine and to try new things. Travel a bit. Even if it’s just an hour away. Eat new things. Get out of your comfort zone. Maybe pull a newbie and eat ass. I dunno what you’re into lol. 

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No.

Sometimes, but I don’t think most of the time.

Maybe I am most of the time and I place undue emphasis on the times I am not.

Maybe I am not most of the time but I should be and if I just changed my perspective I would be.

I don’t know. Does anyone know?

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6 years ago, I would have said no.  Got laid off at 33.  Didnt have a specialized profession, so I couldn't just go find another job as a doctor for example.  I have a general "business admin" degree.  I was unemployed for a couple of months.

But since then I got a job in a new industry, worked my ass off to become a valuable asset to my company, make good money (not "geek club" rich but good), met the love of my life (36 EE's), have a 14 month old daughter, bought a great fixer upper house in a fabulous metro neighborhood.

I thought I would have gotten to this position a lot sooner in life, and that started to really affect me when i was in my early 30's.   But I've learned it's not really "when" but "how" you got there.

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I used to feel that way a lot,tried filling that void with drinking,weed,sex,football etc. but like you said it was all a temporary good feeling.About 10 months ago an old friend prompted me to pick up and an old book and told me if I was sincere all I had to do was ask and answers to my questions would be answered.Let me just say I was miserable and at the point where I needed some answers.

Yes,the book was The Bible and one of the first passages I came across was Proverbs 20 which said,"Wine is a mocker,beer is a brawler,those led astray by it are unwise." Speaking for me personally it was like looking in a mirror because that passage was directed at me.

Anyhow,I decided at that time that I had tried everything my way to no avail and thought what could it hurt to try this.I mean if there was a God and He had created me then maybe His book did have the answers I was looking for.

All I can say is that was about 10 months ago and I have since been sober for a little over 9 months,I read His word daily and am even attending church on a regular basis and am more content/happier than I can ever remember because IMO that void is now filled with what it was intended for and that's a relationship with my creator.

 

 

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I'm good. I'd be a lot better if the Giants were decent. And I had a Roomba 

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Don’t sweat the little things. I am happy. I am not looking for the perfect life. I am happy with what I have and just looking to get a little better every day. 

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The secret to happiness is staying relatively healthy, having a loving family, and the dirty, filthy, most depraved internet style sex with the OP's wife. 

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1 minute ago, DonS said:

The secret to happiness is staying relatively healthy, having a loving family, and the dirty, filthy, most depraved internet style sex with the OP's wife. 

Great post 

  • Thanks 1

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13 minutes ago, DonS said:

The secret to happiness is staying relatively healthy, having a loving family, and the dirty, filthy, most depraved internet style sex with the OP's Mom.

FYP. This is the Geek Club

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Just now, Patriotsfatboy1 said:

FYP. This is the Geek Club

My bad.  Should've said wife AND mom, since they're both dirty sluts. 

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1 minute ago, drobeski said:

Poor thing, forced to be a Bill's fan and hating it. :(

It's all about my happiness. 

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14 minutes ago, DonS said:

Seriously though, get a dog if you don't have one ready. 

https://ibb.co/3s5s8RL

 

Who has old azz tower speakers in the house anymore? Those belong in the garage. That dog sh!ts on his owner's pillow, guaranteed. 

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1 minute ago, shorepatrol said:

Who has old azz tower speakers in the house anymore? Those belong in the garage. That dog sh!ts on his owner's pillow, guaranteed. 

Funny you mention that.  I haven't used my nice receiver, Blu Ray player, or surround sound speakers in forever.  Need to get rid of them along with the sh1t ton of CDs and movies.  Now get the fock off my lawn!!! 

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44 minutes ago, DonS said:

Funny you mention that.  I haven't used my nice receiver, Blu Ray player, or surround sound speakers in forever.  Need to get rid of them along with the sh1t ton of CDs and movies.  Now get the fock off my lawn!!! 

Hookem up in the garage and crank  that . 

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2 hours ago, nzoner said:

I used to feel that way a lot,tried filling that void with drinking,weed,sex,football etc. but like you said it was all a temporary good feeling.About 10 months ago an old friend prompted me to pick up and an old book and told me if I was sincere all I had to do was ask and answers to my questions would be answered.Let me just say I was miserable and at the point where I needed some answers.

Yes,the book was The Bible and one of the first passages I came across was Proverbs 20 which said,"Wine is a mocker,beer is a brawler,those led astray by it are unwise." Speaking for me personally it was like looking in a mirror because that passage was directed at me.

Anyhow,I decided at that time that I had tried everything my way to no avail and thought what could it hurt to try this.I mean if there was a God and He had created me then maybe His book did have the answers I was looking for.

All I can say is that was about 10 months ago and I have since been sober for a little over 9 months,I read His word daily and am even attending church on a regular basis and am more content/happier than I can ever remember because IMO that void is now filled with what it was intended for and that's a relationship with my creator.

 

 

Nice 

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Sure.  Mostly  

I have an awesome wife. She’s the nicest, most sincere person I’ve ever met   We are compatible in every way and we have the same goals for ourselves and our family     

I have  2 amazing sons.  One shares my love of sports and excels in 3 of them.  The other shares my love of music and playing guitar.  He’s really gotten good in a short period of time.  

We have a nice place in a nice community and a core group of good friends   

I don’t love my job.  It’s fine but it’s just what I do to pay the bills and put food on the table.   

My wife also works, mostly for the medical insurance. I wish she didn’t have to. 

My MIL is moving in on Monday so we’ll see how that changes things.   

Plans are in the works to build a guest house for her.  

We’ll see what happens. 

 

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11 minutes ago, vuduchile said:

Sure.  Mostly  

I have an awesome wife. She’s the nicest, most sincere person I’ve ever met   We are compatible in every way and we have the same goals for ourselves and our family     

I have  2 amazing sons.  One shares my love of sports and excels in 3 of them.  The other shares my love of music and playing guitar.  He’s really gotten good in a short period of time.  

We have a nice place in a nice community and a core group of good friends   

I don’t love my job.  It’s fine but it’s just what I do to pay the bills and put food on the table.   

My wife also works, mostly for the medical insurance. I wish she didn’t have to. 

My MIL is moving in on Monday so we’ll see how that changes things.   

Plans are in the works to build a guest house for her.  

We’ll see what happens. 

 

You poor bastard :(

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I'm surprised nobody has quoted the words of the great philosopher from Cimmeria on what is the best things in life:

To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentations of their women!

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11 hours ago, nzoner said:

I used to feel that way a lot,tried filling that void with drinking,weed,sex,football etc. but like you said it was all a temporary good feeling.About 10 months ago an old friend prompted me to pick up and an old book and told me if I was sincere all I had to do was ask and answers to my questions would be answered.Let me just say I was miserable and at the point where I needed some answers.

Yes,the book was The Bible and one of the first passages I came across was Proverbs 20 which said,"Wine is a mocker,beer is a brawler,those led astray by it are unwise." Speaking for me personally it was like looking in a mirror because that passage was directed at me.

Anyhow,I decided at that time that I had tried everything my way to no avail and thought what could it hurt to try this.I mean if there was a God and He had created me then maybe His book did have the answers I was looking for.

All I can say is that was about 10 months ago and I have since been sober for a little over 9 months,I read His word daily and am even attending church on a regular basis and am more content/happier than I can ever remember because IMO that void is now filled with what it was intended for and that's a relationship with my creator.

 

 

Quitter 

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10 hours ago, peenie said:

No, but I'm grateful. 

This. Most days I’m content. I have a good wife and family, make decent money and have relative good health. That’s a really good life as compared to the vast majority of people in the world.

To the OP, I am a huge believer in regular exercise to keep your moods straight and a creative outlet is great especially if you’re doing it without any goals in mind just for your own fun. :thumbsup: 

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9 hours ago, vuduchile said:

Sure.  Mostly  

I have an awesome wife. She’s the nicest, most sincere person I’ve ever met   We are compatible in every way and we have the same goals for ourselves and our family     

I have  2 amazing sons.  One shares my love of sports and excels in 3 of them.  The other shares my love of music and playing guitar.  He’s really gotten good in a short period of time.  

We have a nice place in a nice community and a core group of good friends   

I don’t love my job.  It’s fine but it’s just what I do to pay the bills and put food on the table.   

My wife also works, mostly for the medical insurance. I wish she didn’t have to. 

My MIL is moving in on Monday so we’ll see how that changes things.   

Plans are in the works to build a guest house for her.  

We’ll see what happens. 

 

In laws live with me...gotta admit..its a nightmare.  Hope its better for you.  FIL is greta...MIL psycho control freak...she threatens to move out regularly trying to upset my wife...

My wife finally started sending her apartment listings and she shut up.  MIL wont talk to me because i call her out on her BS.  It hasnt been pretty.  They travel from morning to night in the car day after day...so we dont really see them much.  Stay in their bedroom after they come in.  It sucks

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Absolutely.

  • I've got an amazing wife and together we're raising a smart, honest, and hard working kid.
  • I grew up poor but through hard work and some luck, I now know that my family will never go hungry and never have to worry about power or heat getting turned off.
  • My job is rewarding from both monetarily and the mission.  And, I mostly work with really good people who share a common mission (very high rate of former military and it's the closest I've been to working in a military environment since I got out in 2001).
  • I have enough money to pursue the hobbies I enjoy and my wife shares my major ones (video games and skiing).
  • I'm able to pay someone to do the work I don't want to do (dog crap, and we have a house cleaner who comes once every 2 weeks).
  • While my doctor would say I'm probably a little overweight, I'm in fairly good shape (run 3-4x/week, ski 20-30 days a year) and all of the numbers they checked for during my last physical came back in the healthy range.  Although, my prostate does flare up once a month or so making taking a piss last forever.
  • My parents and in-laws are getting older and while my mom's health isn't the greatest I don't see any of them dying for another decade or so (outside of an accident).
  • I've got a great group of very close friends 4 local, 6 that live throughout the country but we all manage to get together 6-8 times a year.

All said and done, I'm healthy and get enjoyment out of my family, friends, hobbies, and career.  Those 4 things take up over 90% of my waking time.  I can't really find anything to complain about (except the Broncos suck).

Edited to add:
Don S reminded me... I have 3 dogs that are always happy to see me when I get home.  It's great to come home to.

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1 hour ago, Cloaca du jour said:

In laws live with me...gotta admit..its a nightmare.  Hope its better for you.  FIL is greta...MIL psycho control freak...she threatens to move out regularly trying to upset my wife...

My wife finally started sending her apartment listings and she shut up.  MIL wont talk to me because i call her out on her BS.  It hasnt been pretty.  They travel from morning to night in the car day after day...so we dont really see them much.  Stay in their bedroom after they come in.  It sucks

Sorry man.  My MIL isn't the worst person in the world, but she is a little loopy.  We are converting a detached garage into a guest house for her, so she should only actually be in our space for a few months.  We shall see.  

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Happiness is the G-spot on the wh0re of life. You're never going to find it and even if you do, you can't be sure it's real.

With that being said, I'm very content with my life. Yes, I'm happy at times but am I satisfied with all aspects? No but I'm content with most things.

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