So, I quit last night. In mildly spectacular fashion. 😁

[wiffleball 4,631]

I'll fill in the details later if you want. 

 

Highlight? Your hero walks in. Pissed. Puts his hands on the bar. And, in Best Full Throated Wiffle Voice?  (And trust me, it's a voice. When I'm pissed, I make Pacino sound like Johnny effing  Weir. )

 

"Who the F is J**** M*****? And where the F is she?"

 

Everything after that? Just gravy baby.

 

I'm the nicest guy in the world. 

Until I'm not. 

 

 

In the industry in this cow town,? Haven't paid for a drink all GD day. The only disappointing part? I don't get to break the news. Because it apparently spread like wildfire. 

 

I did what everybody wants to do. But dont have the balls. Hence, free shots.

 

And four job offers and counting. 

 

And that's just one job. One of my other bosses is thrilled: more of Me for Her. And she works for the same company I just quit. 

 

Weird moment: Owners Dad showed up from Denver last night. He thinks we served in the same war. No kidding. 

 

Still wants me to open up their new place. 

 

Bert has seen me mildly angry. 

 

I've upped my game. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[shorepatrol 1,735]

8 minutes ago, wiffleball said:

 

I'm the nicest guy in the world. 

Until I'm not. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Welcome to the club

[Cloaca du jour 2,064]

This is alot of demand to make fries.

[wiffleball 4,631]

1 minute ago, Cloaca du jour said:

This is alot of demand to make fries.

Goddammit, they're waffle fries. It's a whole different thing,!  Why can't people understand that's? 

 

Might as well ask me to make potato cakes.

[Voltaire 4,554]

When there's such high demand for work in a place with a shortage of competent people, there's no need to get stuck in a job that doesn't treat you right. It's a relief that your lack of potato cake talent does not seem to be a hindrance in finding work elsewhere.

[Brad GLuckman 518]

Nah come on. Need more details. What do you actually do? Why did you quit?

[Hardcore troubadour 12,589]

7 minutes ago, Brad GLuckman said:

Nah come on. Need more details. What do you actually do? Why did you quit?

Kramerica industries. 

[Bier Meister 1,512]

It was chiffanade of the cilantro, wasn’t it?

 

you need baby hands, like digby, for jobs like that. Not your bratwurst fingers

[wiffleball 4,631]

14 minutes ago, Bier Meister said:

It was chiffanade of the cilantro, wasn’t it?

 

you need baby hands, like digby, for jobs like that. Not your bratwurst fingers

Your wife never complains. 

 

[wiffleball 4,631]

So, not even closed yet. 

 

They sent a handful of the least odious to find me. Doesn't take Gps. Might as well have a GD tracking chip. 

 

I mean, literally. Active employees to track me down. One bartender actively lied. 

 

They were very nice. They bought me food and beers, said nice things and rubbed my back. 

 

Man, I wish I was nicer. 

 

I'm not. 

 

It's not a war. Or maybe it is.  

Because nobody wins . 

[wiffleball 4,631]

I love this. Just got the note. When they told the other guys that they're going to have to fill in for my position? They both quit. On the spot. Literally. Not concurrently. The first guy quit. And then a few hours later, the other guy just said f*** it.

 

The dipshiit* I called out? Had to spend the entire night filling in. As did the kitchen manager. 

 

And how did I hear this? From the other kitchen manager. Who is furious. Just seething.

 

And the owner's dad? Well.. I won't put him in that situation. 

 

 

Sometimes karma takes a while. Sometimes, it doesn't. 

 

I just showed up at the bar right next door to work. I mean, my former work. Bartender told me I don't have a tab. -  That the aforementioned kitchen manager figured I'd be in and he's got my tab.  Indefinitely.

 

Theres you guys. Then there's the real world. @Bert and @Mungwater ? Transcend both. They're spectacular. But on a day that I should be... less than happy? I'm rolling aces. And guys who shouldn't give two s**** about me?  On my six. Strapped and Gunning. 

 

Beat that with a stick. 

[Gladiators 1,903]

5 hours ago, wiffleball said:

I love this. Just got the note. When they told the other guys that they're going to have to fill in for my position? They both quit. On the spot. Literally. Not concurrently. The first guy quit. And then a few hours later, the other guy just said f*** it.

I always figured you were a fluffer, but you threw me off a bit with all the kitchen/bar talk.  Must be where it's filmed.

[Nomad99 401]

I got excited.....thought you quit the bored.....

[WhiteWonder 2,171]

So you quit your bus boy job at the local bar and some guys didn’t want to take over your tables so they quit too… 

 

that’s the gist? 

[porkbutt 860]

you shouldn't make such hasty decisions when on your period

[Hardcore troubadour 12,589]

4 minutes ago, WhiteWonder said:

So you quit your bus boy job at the local bar and some guys didn’t want to take over your tables so they quit too… 

 

that’s the gist? 

I heard some Mexicans are actually going back because it’s too expensive here. Those guys probably said Fock it, I’m going home. 

[wiffleball 4,631]

5 minutes ago, WhiteWonder said:

So you quit your bus boy job at the local bar and some guys didn’t want to take over your tables so they quit too… 

 

that’s the gist? 

Man, maybe someday.

 

When I get my GED...

[JustinCharge 2,397]

 

[DonS 3,063]

Are you still protecting women folk from old men at the grocery store? 

[wiffleball 4,631]

7 minutes ago, DonS said:

Are you still protecting women folk from old men at the grocery store? 

I'm an old man leering at young girls in a bar.

Currently.

 

Swear to god, if I had a daughter, she'd wear a wetsuit and a burqa. 

[Hardcore troubadour 12,589]

17 minutes ago, wiffleball said:

I'm an old man leering at young girls in a bar.

Currently.

 

Swear to god, if I had a daughter, she'd wear a wetsuit and a burqa. 

Those day bar girls.  Ooh la la. Why am I picturing the bar scenes in Barfly? 

[TheNewGirl 1,020]

15 hours ago, Hardcore troubadour said:

Kramerica industries. 

Perhaps Wiffle is really Art Vandelay - Importer/Exporter

[Hardcore troubadour 12,589]

1 minute ago, TheNewGirl said:

Perhaps Wiffle is really Art Vandelay - Importer/Exporter

Belcher/Puker

[nobody 2,032]

So why were you upset with J**** M*****?

[JustinCharge 2,397]

47 minutes ago, DonS said:

Are you still protecting women folk from old men at the grocery store? 

thats a great term BTW.  i might start referring to everyone a folk.  were all folk now.

[Hardcore troubadour 12,589]

12 minutes ago, JustinCharge said:

thats a great term BTW.  i might start referring to everyone a folk.  were all folk now.

Obama did. 

[Alias Detective 1,179]

17 hours ago, wiffleball said:

Goddammit, they're wiffle fries. It's a whole different thing,!  Why can't people understand that's? 

 

Might as well ask me to make potato cakes.

Fixed

[wiffleball 4,631]

56 minutes ago, JustinCharge said:

thats a great term BTW.  i might start referring to everyone a folk.  were all folk now.

The minute Trump got elected, we were all folked.

[wiffleball 4,631]

13 minutes ago, Alias Detective said:

Fixed

[Bier Meister 1,512]

31 minutes ago, Alias Detective said:

Fixed

Wiffle fries are what he makes in the shower.

[phillybear 364]

I remember the last time I quit a job. I came in one morning, and slit everybody's throats, field dressed them, and did backstrokes in their intestines. Then set the place on fire. Burned it to the ground. 

Yep. That was the last time. FIRED my job.

Good times. Good times. 

So, anywho, you need any gasoline? 

[wiffleball 4,631]

I'm honestly struggling right now. I help out at two different restaurants owned by the same family. What I do? I do very intensely and very well. And then I leave.  Doesn't matter if I'm licking f****** stamps. Doesn't matter what you're getting paid. Doesn't matter what you're doing. Do every job with excellence and passion or not at all. 

 

I'm leaning towards the latter.

 

This was a turbulent, unsatisfying and abrupt  break up.  

 

They want me to go to work at the other place in less than an hour.

 

That alone is somewhat of a repudiation of the place I just quit. F*** them.

 

The only reason Id go? Ever? So I don't f*** over my coworkers. Screw management and ownership. Greedy  ungrateful bastards.

I can walk out of a billion dollar corporation and shake the dust off my feet.  Bert's Personally witnessed that. No matter what you hear, there's no such thing as a corporate tax emergency.  They never missed a beat.  Nor should they.  Neither did I. 

 

But they paid a hell of a lot for my goodbye luncheon.

But if I f*** off tonight? Somebody doesn't get home to their kid for another few hours or misses a bus, or has to pay for an Uber that costs them more than a day's wage.

 

I know that, because I've done that. Too many f****** times.

 

And it won't be the owners. Nor the manager picking up the slack. 

Well, now I have a little over half an hour. I know me. I'll walk in, I'll throw hard. Be scary quiet. And if somebody wants to let me go? It'll be a favor. That I'm praying for.

 

 

[wiffleball 4,631]

5 minutes ago, Bier Meister said:

Wiffle fries are what he makes in the shower.

I think you might be confused.

 

That would be the waffle stomp. 

 

🧇

[craftsman 1,045]

23 minutes ago, wiffleball said:

I'm honestly struggling right now. I help out at two different restaurants owned by the same family. What I do? I do very intensely and very well. And then I leave.  Doesn't matter if I'm licking f****** stamps. Doesn't matter what you're getting paid. Doesn't matter what you're doing. Do every job with excellence and passion or not at all. 

 

I'm leaning towards the latter.

 

This was a turbulent, unsatisfying and abrupt  break up.  

 

They want me to go to work at the other place in less than an hour.

 

That alone is somewhat of a repudiation of the place I just quit. F*** them.

 

The only reason Id go? Ever? So I don't f*** over my coworkers. Screw management and ownership. Greedy  ungrateful bastards.

I can walk out of a billion dollar corporation and shake the dust off my feet.  Bert's Personally witnessed that. No matter what you hear, there's no such thing as a corporate tax emergency.  They never missed a beat.  Nor should they.  Neither did I. 

 

But they paid a hell of a lot for my goodbye luncheon.

But if I f*** off tonight? Somebody doesn't get home to their kid for another few hours or misses a bus, or has to pay for an Uber that costs them more than a day's wage.

 

I know that, because I've done that. Too many f****** times.

 

And it won't be the owners. Nor the manager picking up the slack. 

Well, now I have a little over half an hour. I know me. I'll walk in, I'll throw hard. Be scary quiet. And if somebody wants to let me go? It'll be a favor. That I'm praying for.

 

 

Your mind lives in a wild jungle of weird.

[Hardcore troubadour 12,589]

28 minutes ago, wiffleball said:

I'm honestly struggling right now. I help out at two different restaurants owned by the same family. What I do? I do very intensely and very well. And then I leave.  Doesn't matter if I'm licking f****** stamps. Doesn't matter what you're getting paid. Doesn't matter what you're doing. Do every job with excellence and passion or not at all. 

 

I'm leaning towards the latter.

 

This was a turbulent, unsatisfying and abrupt  break up.  

 

They want me to go to work at the other place in less than an hour.

 

That alone is somewhat of a repudiation of the place I just quit. F*** them.

 

The only reason Id go? Ever? So I don't f*** over my coworkers. Screw management and ownership. Greedy  ungrateful bastards.

I can walk out of a billion dollar corporation and shake the dust off my feet.  Bert's Personally witnessed that. No matter what you hear, there's no such thing as a corporate tax emergency.  They never missed a beat.  Nor should they.  Neither did I. 

 

But they paid a hell of a lot for my goodbye luncheon.

But if I f*** off tonight? Somebody doesn't get home to their kid for another few hours or misses a bus, or has to pay for an Uber that costs them more than a day's wage.

 

I know that, because I've done that. Too many f****** times.

 

And it won't be the owners. Nor the manager picking up the slack. 

Well, now I have a little over half an hour. I know me. I'll walk in, I'll throw hard. Be scary quiet. And if somebody wants to let me go? It'll be a favor. That I'm praying for.

 

 

Did you ever know that you’re my hero? You’re everything I wish I could be. I could soar higher than an eagle. You are the shite beneath my shoe.  

[wiffleball 4,631]

6 minutes ago, craftsman said:

Your mind lives in a wild jungle of weird.

Well, since this is my signature line now. And it seems entirely appropriate. Who the f*** are you now?

[wiffleball 4,631]

1 minute ago, Hardcore troubadour said:

Did you ever know that you’re my hero? You’re everything I wish I could be. I could soar higher than an eagle. You are the shite beneath my shoe.  

You are the wind beneath my shorts.

[craftsman 1,045]

Just now, wiffleball said:

Well, since this is my signature line now. And it seems entirely appropriate. Who the f*** are you now?

We don't know each other.

But you seems nuts.

[Bier Meister 1,512]

39 minutes ago, wiffleball said:

I think you might be confused.

 

That would be the waffle stomp. 

 

🧇

Exactly….

 

the wiffle stomp 

[josh wiley 27]

Simple question. Why’d u quit?