devin952

You would be what I concider a top priority. The Ave tip is (for order under $20.00) $2.00, $3.00 ill remember, But $4+ will have drivers fighting over you every nite. Also, tipping a buck or less, well, now your just insulting me!

I have to disagree, I bring hungry people pizza for a livin, and I never forget someone who fails to tip. Im guessing your wait staff does the same. Somehow I really dont think you go to a bar and dont tip, but if you do, mabey its time to start. You have to remember, these people live off off what you give them. The only time not to tip is when - service is provided. Also, - service = bad attitude, not timely service, this is not there fault 99.9% of the time.

fixored!

list I stole off a site.. some of these I never knew. Drinking Rules? 0. I've added a new rule that should take precedence over all the others and everybody should abide by. No matter how much you've had to drink, do NOT under any circumstances do what Tina is doing on this link (2.2mb). 1. If you owe someone money, always pay them back in a bar. Preferably during happy hour. 2. Always toast before doing a shot. 3. Whoever buys the shot gets the first chance to offer a toast. 4. Change your toast at least once a month. 5. Buying someone a drink is five times better than a handshake. 6. Buying a strange woman a drink is still cool. Buying all her drinks is dumb. 7. Never borrow more than one cigarette from the same person in one night. 8. When the bartender is slammed, resist the powerful urge to order a slightly-dirty, very-dry, in-and-out, super-chilled half-and-half martini with a lemon twist. Limit orders to beer, straight shots and two-part cocktails. 9. Get the bartender's attention with eye contact and a smile. 10. Do not make eye contact with the bartender if you do not want a drink. 11. Unacceptable things to say after doing a shot: Great, now I'm going to get drunk. I hate shots. It's coming back up. 12. Never, ever tell a bartender he made your drink too strong. 13. If he makes it too weak, order a double next time. He'll get the message. 14. If you offer to buy a woman a drink and she refuses, she does not like you. 15. If you offer to buy a woman a drink and she accepts, she still might not like you. 16. If she buys you a drink, she likes you. 17. If someone offers to buy you a drink, do not upgrade your liquor preference. 18. Always have a corkscrew in your house. 19. If you don't have a corkscrew, push the cork down into the bottle with a pen. 20. Drink one girly drink in public and you will forever be known as the guy who drinks girly drinks. 21. Our parents were better drinkers than we are. You're still reading these. Don't you have anything better to do? 22. Never talk to someone in the restroom unless you're doing the same thing-urinating, waiting in line or washing your hands. 23. Girls hang out, apply make-up, and have long talks in the bathroom. Men do not. 24. After your sixth drink, do not look at yourself in the mirror. It will shake your confidence. 25. It is only permissible to shout 'woo-hoo!' if you are doing a shot with four or more people. 26. If there is a d.j., you can request a song only once per night. If he doesn't play it within half an hour, do not approach him again. If he does play it, do not approach him again. 27. Learn how to make a rose out of a bar napkin. You'll be surprised how well it works. 28. If you can't afford to tip, you can't afford to drink in a bar. Go to the liquor store. 29. If you owe someone twenty dollars or less, you may pay them back in beer. 30. Never complain about the quality or brand of a free drink. 31. If you have been roommates with someone more than six months, you may drink all their beer, even if it's hidden, as long as you leave them one. 32. You can have a shot of their hard liquor only if the cap has been cracked and the bottle goes for less than $25. 33. The only thing that tastes better than free liquor is stolen liquor. 34. If you bring Old Milwaukee to a party, you must drink at least two cans before you start drinking the imported beer in the fridge. 35. Learn to appreciate hangovers. If it was all good times every jackass would be doing it. 36. If you ever feel depressed, get out a bartender's guide and browse through all the drinks you've never tried. 37. Try one new drink each week. 38. If your are the bar's sole customer, you are obliged to make small talk with the bartender until he stops acknowledging you. Then you're off the hook. The same goes for him. 39. Never tip with coins that have touched you. If your change is $1.50, you can tell the barmaid to keep the change, but once she has handed it to you, you cannot give it back. To a bartender or cocktail waitress, small change has no value. 40. If you have ever told a bartender, "Hey, it all spends the same," then you are a cheap ass. Why don't you stop reading these and come clean my house? 41. Anyone on stage or behind a bar is fifty percent better looking. 42. You can tell how hard a drinker someone is by how close they keep their drink to their mouth. 43. A bar is a college, not a nursery. If you spill a beer, clean it up. If you break a glass, wait for a staff member to clean it up, then blame it on someone else. 44. Being drunk is feeling sophisticated without being able to say it. 45. It's okay to drink alone. 46. After three drinks, you will forget a woman's name two seconds after she tells you. The rest of the night you will call her "baby" or "darling". 47. Nothing screams 'nancy boy' louder than swirling an oversized brandy snifter. 48. Men don't drink from straws. Unless you're doing a Mind or Face Eraser. 49. If you do a shot, finish it. If you don't plan to finish it, don't accept it. 50. Never brood in a dance bar. Never dance in a dive. 51. Never play more than three songs by the same artist in a row. 52. Your songs will come on as you're leaving the bar. 53. Never yell out jukebox selections to someone you don't know. 54. Never lie in a bar. You may, however, grossly exaggerate and lean. 55. If you think you might be slurring a little, then you are slurring a lot. If you think you are slurring a lot, then you are not speaking English. 56. Screaming, "Someone buy me a drink!" has never worked. 57. For every drink, there is a five percent better chance you will get in a fight. There is also a three percent better chance you will lose the fight. 58. Fighting an extremely drunk person when you are sober is hilarious. Your mother would be proud of you for sticking it out this far. 59. If you are broke and a friend is "sporting you", you must laugh at all his jokes and play wingman when he makes his move. 60. If you are broke and a friend is "making sport of you", you may steal any drink he leaves unattended. 61. Never rest your head on a table or bar top. It is the equivalent of voluntarily putting your head on a chopping block. 62. If you are trading rounds with a friend and he asks if you're ready for another, always say yes. Once you fall out of sync you will end up buying more drinks than him. 63. If you're going to hit on a member of the bar staff, make sure you tip well before and after, regardless of her response. 64. The people with the most money are rarely the best tippers. 65. Before you die, single-handedly make one decent martini. 66. Asking a bartender what beers are on tap when the handles are right in front of you is the equivalent of saying, "I'm an idiot." 67. Never ask a bartender "what's good tonight?" They do not fly in the scotch fresh from the coast every morning. 68. If there is a line for drinks, get your ###### drink and step the hell away from the bar. 69. If there is ever any confusion, the fuller beer is yours. 70. The patrons at your local bar are your extended family, your fathers and mothers, your brothers and sisters. Except you get to sleep with these sisters. And if you're really drunk, the mothers. 71. It's acceptable, traditional in fact, to disappear during a night of hard drinking. You will appear mysterious and your friends will understand. If they even notice. 72. Never argue your tab at the end of the night. Remember, you're hammered and they're sober. It's akin to a precocious five-year-old arguing the super-string theory with a physicist. 99.9% of the time you're wrong and either way you're going to come off as a jackass. 73. If you bring booze to a party, you must drink it or leave it. 74. If you hesitate more than three seconds after the bartender looks at you, you do not deserve a drink. 75. Beer makes you mellow, champagne makes you silly, wine makes you dramatic, tequila makes you felonious. You're almost there...don't stop now. 76. The greatest thing a drunkard can do is buy a round of drinks for a packed bar. 77. Never preface a conversation with a bartender with "I know this is going to be a hassle, but . . ." 78. When you're in a bar and drunk, your boss is just another guy begging for a fat lip. Unless he's buying. 79. If you are 86'd, do not return for at least three months. To come back sooner makes it appear no other bar wants you. 80. Anyone with three or more drinks in his hands has the right of way. 81. If you're going to drink on the job, drink vodka. It's the no-tell liquor. 82. There's nothing wrong with drinking before noon. Especially if you're supposed to be at work. 83. The bar clock moves twice as fast from midnight to last call. 84. A flask engraved with a personal message is one of the best gifts you can ever give. And make sure there's something in it. 85. On the intimacy scale, sharing a quiet drink is between a handshake and a kiss. 86. What do I do if I drank too much booze? Drink more booze! 87. If you are dating someone who gets free liquor from the liquor store because they are the stores' best customer, RUN. NOW. VERY FAST. And then a little self-review won't hurt either. 88. Drinking RULES!! 89. You will forget everyone of of these rules by your fifth drink.

see post # 2 ... Ive never hada problem to date.

Alcohol 120 http://www.download.com/Alcohol-120-/3000-2646-10158124.html your welcome

Stop looking at my ######! And keep them fingers where I can see them.

Still no love for his hometown

linky

This post deserves atleast one reply. Im happy to see im not the only alcoholic here..... wait, I dont go to meetings, so im just a drunk, anyway, hope ya had a good time. I hade to work all day on the 4th (damm pizza job) so I got extra drunk on the 3erd, my buzz din't wear off till about 7:30 pm today

I bring hungry people pizza. I also make a good living doing this. black people DO NOT TIP ..EBVAH. I really dont think enough about people in a certain race group to dislike them, but man, the negroes make it easy to do. I think they will destroy themself's all on there own, but it will still be the white mans fault, cause after all, after decades.. they can't get back to good, and it's all whitey's doing.

But, what if im smoking while driving, could they make me pull over and finish my smoke? I just dont wanna piss off MADD, them peps just wont die! if i fart, and it smells like beer (i think root beer is close enough) im focked![code]

That focking ###### dumped me, and now I give her 49% of my paycheck.

Im getting drunk tonight alone, because I missed a bachelor party .... I had to deliver pizzas tonite. Everyone is in widsor having fun, and im stuck here, w/lots of 40'dts i just bought. On a good note, at least I din't have to bring a pie to sux man, I really do feel sorry for that pizza dude.

im god damm glad im not your pizza guy! btw, TIP WELL PLEASE!

imakegoodmoneydeliveringpizzadammit!

I dont need your ###### attention, just want your opinion.... - black olives and cheese!