Brut Gnome

Huzzah!

Huzzah!

Huzzah! The gnome was busy at a ren-fest last weekend, so I apologize for not being here to guide your knights to victory. I will provide a couple of players here to help you threw the bye week. Nappers: Titus Young: Why trade for Burleson when you can have a more productive home-run threat? If CJ goes down, this dude is money and is already seeing an average of 5.3 targets a game (Burleson is averaging 5). The uptick here is that CJ usually misses a game or two a year due to an ankle, shoulder or whatever and Burleson does not have the homerun speed Young does. Plug Young into your lineup this week and reap the rewards. I see him finding the end zone this week with a total line of 6 rec. for 80 yards and a TD. 3.75 out of 5 Huzzahs! Preston Parker: Slowly becoming not so much of a sleeper and could be a reason Williams isn't shining like he did last year. Take out week 3 and Parker as 15 rec for 212 yards and a TD. That's an average of 5 rec for 70 yards a game. In a PPR, I'll take 12 points from a fill-in with the possibility of a TD. Should have a good day with Freeman checking down to him in SF. 4 out of 5 Huzzahs! Earnest Graham: Speaking of Tampa players, in a PPR this dude is just consistent. He's not gangbusters, but I think this week with SF being stout against the run, Graham could have a nice day with Blount being stuffed and Freeman needing to make quick reads. 4 car. 20 yards, 7 rec. 55 yards. Good for 14-15 points this week. 3.8 out of 5 Huzzahs! Eli Manning: Against the Seachickens this week, Manning should have a field day. He's starting to find a nice groove, which may only last a game or 3 so ride it while it's hot (and you need a fill in). Look for Eli to throw for 300 and 3 TD's. 3.5 out of 5 Huzzahs! Greg Olsen: Perhaps lost in all the injury stuff this week is that Shockey is suffering from a concussion and other ailments and may not play this week. Even if he does, Olsen has become the second option for a no-fear Newton when it comes to throwing. If Shockey doesn't play, here is a top-3 tight end for you for the week. 6 rec. 85 yards. 1 TD. 4 out of 5 Huzzahs! Smellers: Matt Schaub: The Raiders aren't the pushovers they used to be and Schaub has just lost his best WR. Foster becomes options 1, 2, and 3 with TE Daniels having a decent day. Schaub doesn't finish in the top 10 in QB's this week and only throws for 200 yards with 1 TD but 2 INT's. 3.5 out of 5 Taints. Lance Moore: The ship has sailed. If you were hoping to get anything for him, last week was the time. If you feel lucky, you can roll the dice, but I want no part of any of the Saints receiving corp. Let someone else take the gamble as to whose week this is to have a good day. Moore has below average day. 5 rec. 35 yards. 3.7 out of 5 Taints. Beanie Wells: Nope. Won't happen. Beanie will be lucky to find the endzone this week once let alone 3 times. Minnesota has not allowed a 100 yard rusher yet, and Wells isn't the guy to break that trend. The vikes drop the hammer in this one as well and finally pick up the W. Bad Beanie returns. 85 total yards. No TD for Wells. 3 out of 5 Taints. Jacoby Jones: See Schaub. I keep seeing him plugged into lineups this week, and this is likely done by owners who have never had him. Supposedly all this talent, but just can't put it together. Nuff said. 4.5 out of 5 Taints. FREE WILD CARD! David Nelson: This guy went from a 6 for 84 day to a 2 for 18 day. I'm throwing out last week which would put Nelson at 20 rec for 243 yards and a TD. Nelson gets back on track with another 6 for 85 day and a TD, but if the egg is laid again, it might be time to cut bait. I have faith though. 3.8 out of 5 Huzzahs. No taints here.

Parker and schaub i clearly missed on, so i apologize. Same for graham except if u picked him up, u may have a starting rb depending on blounts injury. Nelson scored but no yards and beanie, well, Meh. I called 300 and 3 for Eli. He did 420 and 3. With the 3 int's, that's minus 6. We get 1 pt for 20 yards, thus Eli's extra 120 equals 6 minus the int's gave him the equivalent of my projection. Baldwin performed well, and Moore did blow, again. Waiting on titus but i predict big things.

The Brut Gnome does not feel the need to defend said picks to Elves. I do not use a made up Bullseye accuracy system, nor credit myself for picks that did not do well. I do not lie by omission, however, I let the people of this fine forearm decide whether my picks benefitted their teams. For the Gnome, the only real way is if a guy I suggested you pick up does well for you compared to your alternatives. The bottom line is, did a guy I suggest put you in a position to win. That being said....UPDATE! Earnest Graham was limited in practice due to a hamstring injury. Keep tabs if you are relying on him. Mike Williams (SEA) looks like he could miss this weeks game. I was already looking at Doug Baldwin as a decent plug and play this week. I'd peg him for 5 for 82 and a TD this week. You could do worse in a PPR and even if the TD doesn't come, 13 points isn't bad. 2.7 out of 5 Huzzahs!

I would move any of them for L.Moore.

Best at PPR & McFadden

Huzzah! I need 2 WR's out of this group. What say you? Maclin, D.Nelson, L.Moore.

Kendall Hunter, Jared Cook Andre Caldwell Donald Jones Torrey Smith Go. Huzzah!

I, the great Brut Gnome, bethrust upon thee Week 3's nappers (on a 5 Huzzah! scale) and smellers (on a 5 Taint scale)*. Behold! *the higher the number of Taints, the more likely they are to smell. Nappers Lance Moore: Too many people are sleeping on him after a no start then a slow start. Lest we forget, Moore became Brees' favorite target sans Colston only a short time ago. The groin appears to be fully healed and having put in a full practice this week, expect a nice game from Sir Lance-o-lot. Many say Sproles will have diminished the role of Moore, however, I view this as being Moore diminishing the role of Sproles. 3.5 out of 5 Huzzahs! Huzzah! Hope you played him! Preston Parker: Don't look now, but Freeman might have a new favorite target. Going 6/98 last week, targeted 7 times (1 less than Winslow) Parker could be a good PPR play this week vs. Atlanta. I don't expect much from Freeman (see below in Smellers) but Parker I have for 6/75 which is good for 13.5 in PPR. Throw in a lucky TD and you've got yourself a 20 pt day. 3 out of 5 Huzzahs! Ugh. Where'd he go? Isaac Redman: This dude is nails should Mendy ever go down. A blowout in Indy translates to 10-13 touches which he turned into 12.5 points in PPR last week. You could do worse for a flex play. 2.5 out of 5 Huzzahs! Demarco Murray: What you may very well witness is the changing of the guard in Dallas Monday night. You laugh, but running backs with bad shoulders hate contact. Felix will cough it up early and Murray will get his chance to shine. And isn't it every year a RB has his coming out party on a Monday night? Is there a bigger stage than Dallas against a hated rival on national television? Nope, there isn't. I have Murray pegged at 75-80 yards and a touch Monday night with a couple of catches for 15 yards as well. 3 out of 5 Huzzahs! Jay Cutler: I can't stand this dude and will never have him on my team, but....Quiz time: How many quarterbacks this year have not thrown for over 400 yards against GB? Zero. And this week Cutler has his chance to go Tecmo on the hapless Pack. Bank on 325 yards and at least 2 tds. 4 out of 5 Huzzahs! 302 2/2 with a fumble. I'll let the critics decide this one. Jermaine Gresham: Simpson is busy playing Sampson (Sampson gets you high!) and Green is gimpy (don't be surprised to find out there's a turf toe injury there next week). As much as I'd like to tout Caldwell here, I think it's Gresham that has a great day tomorrow. 6/60 and a TD is the Gnome's call. 4 out of 5 Huzzahs! 4/51. Missed the TD and would have nailed it. Meh. Smellers Josh Freeman: Quick, when was the last time the Bucs beat Atlanta? Jon Gruden was coach. Freeman is medicore at best and those hoping for him to "break out" again are going to be waiting a while. May the fantasy gods help you if this is your QB1 as the best you'll get is 200 and a TD with 2 INT's tomorrow. Freeman only seems to play in the fourth quarter, but until every quarter is the fourth quarter, this dude should ride the pine. 4.5 out of 5 Taints. 200 2 INTs. Told ya, but they got the W. Which is really all that matters in FF, right? Frank Gore: Yeah, yeah, he's Frank Gore. The same one that hung 59 yards on SEATTLE! You know what I do if Alex Smith is your quarterback, I stack 10 in the box and say beat me with your WR's. It's not like Vernon Davis is being used for anything but blocking and should they choose to move him out wide, they're going to get crushed. Cincy's D doesn't get enough credit tomorrow and Gore has another blah day. Gore gets 65 yards and maybe a TD and while that's not bad, it's not what you expect from your first or second round pick. 3.5 out of 5 Taints. Yeah. Figured as much. He's not right and now he's hurt. Probably cost his owners a game unless they had Welker. Matthew Stafford: That thud you will here Sunday is Stafford crashing back to earth. Minny will get to him all day and Stafford might be lucky enough to just survive this game unscathed. He'll hit 225 and a TD, but throws 2 int's and coughs one up . He'll be fine the rest of the year, but inside sources tell me they're game planned to stop Stafford and pressure him all day. 2.5 out of 5 Taints. First half started exactly as I had imagined, but credit to Det., they figured it out. Missed bad. Jermichael Finley: This guy was likely a high pick in terms of where TE's go. And the guy who grabbed Gronkowski or Fred Davis off the waiver wire laughs at you. Jennings is healty. Nelson is legit. Cobb is coming into his own slowly. Starks has emerged. Driver is still there.... Anyway, you get the point. Finley is not the focal point of this offense, as much as Rodgers tries to convince us every year he'll be zoned in on getting him the rock. You'll keep reading he's "due" for a breakout performance any day. Well, that sucks for a supposed "stud" because they aren't generally "due". They just get theirs. Finley has 4/50. Ugh in standard, meh in PPR. 3 out of 5 Taints. Now this was the kind of jinx I was hoping for. Monster game. See you in 3 weeks, Finley!

What be this geek bored of which they speaketh? Fie and aroint with thee, ale-louse! N'er shall you drink here hence! Huzzah! Fare the well! There's no business, like Gnome business.

Giggidy! Huzzah!

What say ye on yonder darkness? Hath thine predictions not guided thine ship? Huzzah! A pint of ale for all!

Aye, lad. A tough decision to be sure. However, fear not for it gets worse. Without Britt, they will put 8 in the box and it's going to be even rougher for CJ2K. Pour a large pint of ale and gather ye favorite wench. Long, long tides for CJ this year. (alsoIpredicthesreallyhurt)

Aye, it only hurts if you didn't start Moore and sat Gore and Freeman as told. Huzzah!

You're welcome, lad. Glad I could help! Huzzah!

Aye, a bit of the ale in yonder pallet. Thine masses should decide thine fate. Does the Gnome stay or go? What say ye? Huzzah!

Huzzah! Well met, fine fellow. I am the Brut Gnome. Are you seeking advice? Looking for a place to lay for 6 gold pieces? Reminds me of an old yarn I used to spin... There was once a knight whose journey began by a wide river. He leaned over to his companion and stated, "Didn't you read the focking rules?" Then they died. The end. Huzzah!

Turkey leg and ale. Huzzah!

Aye, sounds like a fellow lad has hit the ale to much, eh? Perhaps you should offer him a pint and spin a yarn for a bit. Greet him with Good Morrow or Well met and after discussing the polictics of religion, throw your fist in the air and shout HUZZAH! (if that doesn't work, then this) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JDj3-N80qdU

Aye, this reminds me of a tale from yore: Once upon a time there was an old wizard who lived in a toad stool by the river. He said to start Washington. The end. Huzzah!

I bring thee good tales of yorn. To thrust upon thee good spirits and fine wenches. I invite thee to come hither for thine next celebration. Who's with me? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qgQOpSo8okE Huzzah!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JDj3-N80qdU

What would ye have me do then, young lad? This? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JDj3-N80qdU Huzzah!

Pray fetch yon ale mistress, verily I thank thee. Ha, ha, ha! Huzzah!