TheNewGirl

She doesn't but he does, so she's kind of using that to her advantage and reaching out to his attorney for everything, knowing that he has to pay every time he tries to fock her over with something. She's not reaching out just randomly, it's usually when he does something stupid that's against the agreement that HE put together. Long story short, but she's FINALLY getting spousal support and some child support. But other than that, he's still trying to control everything that happens. He's focking it all up, too at every turn, then blaming it on her. And they aren't even together. He made the courts add some really specific stuff into their agreement thinking that it would fock her, but it's actually focking himself, and he keeps breaking things in the agreement. Every time he does this, she emails the lawyer with the specific sections of the agreement and his text messages that he sends her. He wasn't paying her at all for over a year, until the court basically told him, "You can't do that..." there's clear proof that he makes much more than she does. He was able to find a new place to rent and already has a GF. She's still living with her dad and all of that, even despite getting support. He changed the locks on their rental when she was on the lease (which is illegal) and basically went through all of their stuff, TELLING her what was hers and then put it in storage. Gave her the key and said, "OH, this is how much it costs every month." More or less made her homeless for a short time. It's awful. BUT...after 20 years, she just couldn't do it anymore. I really feel that he would have drained her spirit so much that there would be nothing left. She had to leave him to save herself. She's going back to school now, too...something he promised she could do 20 years ago.

I really think it's possible to have good discussions here. I like seeing your point of view as well - others here not so much.

I thought I saw one of the news outlets claiming the tree fell due to high winds caused by climate change.

And I completely agree with this, along with MDCs statement of why would anyone want to stay together if the other person wants out? I certainly wouldn't if Zirra approached me and said he was done, even tho I've done nothing. The situation in which there is an incentive to get divorced I think is a bit misleading, as many couples end up bankrupt with much much less than they had together. "It's cheaper to keep her" type of scenario. I don't think that women go into marriage thinking that they will "come out ahead" if they just stick it out for a few years and pop out a couple of kids. There's not much incentive for women TO get married, either really just as there really isn't much for men as you stated earlier. If the couple is unbalanced financially to start with one of them making much more than the other, then yes...sign the prenups. If you both go into it with virtually nothing, divorcing can end up destroying credit, children's lives, etc. I guess I don't see an incentive to get divorced, but hubs and I came into our relationship on the poorer side of things (I actually paid off quite a bit of his debt, took care of a past eviction, among other things). My BFF going through a divorce that she initiated is coming out severely poorer and with virtually nothing, despite being TOLD to stay home and raise children while he went out and made money. She has nothing, had to move in with her parents at 47 and shares a room with one of her kids. Hardly an incentive to have left him.

I am not asking you to.

Geek meet was fine. Skids was nice, IIRC we met at Crapplebee's. I had water, and I think he got a beer and some food. We chatted mostly about this place, I believe. The aftermath is what I didn't appreciate. And I am not trolling you.

Maybe!

When? Years and years ago? Unfortunately, one geek meet ruined it for the rest.

I am jealous!!!! Very cool!!!

You think it's something related to drugs or a crime or something?

Yeah, that's wrong.

What do I want to happen?

So...... what you're saying is....he wasn't 100% right? Such a focking joke.

It's not only the open border though, it's the fact that several other key areas have to be cut in order to pay for the people, housing, resources. I know that the "crisis" can be summed up in that one word, but the fact that they are cutting police force and other things like that just make it all the more worse, IMO. Cut police, crime goes up. Not to mention, NY probably has similar laws to CA in what they prosecute and actually spend time on to put offenders away. In CA, many are just let back out hours later. I am glad to see that leaders are a bit more open minded to some extent. It really is ruining cities.

I agree with you. I have said for YEARS that women entering the workforce was a bad idea, it created a lot of confusion about gender roles and identity. And I also agree that equality is good and bad. I also believe that there are areas that women will NEVER be equal to men. We are different and we are supposed to be that way. Also, the younger women want the traditional man, but not the alpha type or toxic male that they fantasize about.

You are the one who brought promiscuity into this discussion with your talk about hoes and gold diggers. Not me. Women initiate divorce most of the time because they are NOT fulfilled in the relationship, sexually or otherwise. You ask a man how their marriage is and you will more often than not receive, "It's going okay." You ask the wife and she will have a completely different story. I had a bigger reply but back buttoned. I'll just leave it at the above because I really don't think that 90sbebe gives a cr@p about any of it.

You brought promiscuity into the discussion. And a NIH study is bullshiit? Ok. You're kind of pointless to try and discuss this with, honestly. You've obviously been burned by some pretty shiity women, or you're still just too young to have gone through something significant with your partner to truly understand what it's like to have a loving partnership. Maybe you have and you're just bitter, I don't know. You think that women should remain virginal and perfect, and shouldn't get shiite if the marriage ends. Building a life together doesn't make sense to you, and women are just out to be hoes and gold diggers. I feel for you, I really do.

https://www.forbes.com/sites/janetwburns/2017/02/27/straight-women-are-given-fewest-orgasms-study-finds/?sh=4c0c9b60722d https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/28213723/ https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/37372797/

FFS, I did not. But, in our case...I did. He came into the relationship with a not great credit score, evictions, and a record. I paid that off FOR him. Do I feel entitled to that being paid back? NO. We've been together 25 years and that ship has sailed. You get married and at the time you're both renting, poor, have nothing. Together you build a life where you can now own a home, own nicer cars, have children and raise them together. I am entitled to nothing really. I've been married almost 23 years. Our kids are adults. There really isn't much to "fight" over or feel entitled to other than our house.

There's an actual study that shows that heterosexual women are the LEAST sexually satisfied in comparison to homosexual men and homosexual women relationships. So, being more promiscuous has little to do with divorce rates, unless that's a driver for the woman, and in general it's not. The bolded isn't true if you built a life together. You're speaking historically. Why do women leave marriages NOW?

No, I think we've moved on to the "why bother because all women are gold digging hoes" part of the divorce discussions, and she's just going to take half of my shiiite anyways.

I don't think that's it. Maybe a small subset, but not really the reason why women file more often than men. Many women feel like they'd be "better off alone" and not in any kind of relationship at all, not hoeing around or whatever. Now, do you really think it's about what society is telling them, or is that just what you see on social media? I've seen PLENTY of these kinds of women (usually younger with at least one child already) looking for a man you makes 6 figures, will support them in their child rearing, not require them to work, etc. But I don't think that this is "normal" society. What do you really think is the reason why women want out more than men?

Why do you think that is?

PACs and teachers unions, which then "donate" it to the democrat of their choice. Gavin Newsome has the CA teachers Union in his focking pocket; they are one of (if not the) latest donor to his campaign.

This. My BFF is going though this right now. At first the ex husband was fairly decent; but his anger is now up to an 11. She married a textbook narcissist and tried for over 20 years to make it work, raised the kids when he told her to "just stay home and raise them." He filed his case for divorce claiming that SHE needed to pay him spousal support. It's just a mess and he's definitely not functioning on logic, it's all anger.