George Carlin

Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck

Here's to wanting Vick and Craterface to team up to take down Kavanaugh. Vick is going to pay Antwoine Mitchell a little visit this evening.

to skip final two seasons for draft http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/draft2006/ne...tory?id=2411206 Connecticut sophomore guard Rudy Gay will announce he will skip his final two seasons of eligibility and enter the NBA draft at a 3 p.m. ET news conference on campus Monday. The news was expected for weeks. Gay, who will likely hire an agent, has been projected as a top 10 pick throughout the season. Connecticut junior forward Josh Boone declared earlier this month but, unlike Gay, isn't expected to sign with an agent to preserve his amateur status in case he wants to return to school. Connecticut is also expecting junior point guard Marcus Williams to announce his intentions to leave for the NBA and sign with an agent later this week. The Connecticut coaching staff said throughout the season that they expected Gay to be gone. They also anticipated Williams' departure. That's in part why the Huskies signed six players in the fall. UConn was already losing four seniors. So, the Huskies will have a North Carolina-like exodus if Boone stays in the draft with their top six players gone from the 30-4 co-Big East champs. The top returning scorer would be freshman forward Jeff Adrien (6.5 ppg).

How dare you rip off my routine you motherfocker

Appreciate the reminder. I will be right back, have to go like my posts.

http://www.robertschimmel.com/

Lamar

I will stab you in your sleep.

You are so focking dead to me.

Nothing works, nothing counts, nothing fits, no one cares, no one listens, standards have fallen, everyone's fatter, lines are longer, traffic's worse, kids are dumber, and the air is dirty. I'll be back later with more reasons for giving up hope. In the meantime, try to come up with a few of your own.

Al Swearengen may be riding off into the effin' sunset a little sooner than expected. HBO has confirmed that it will not pick up the contract options for Deadwood cast members, indicating that the upcoming third season of the cuss-happy western may be its last. According to Variety, the ensemble's contracts will expire on June 11, the date of the third-season premiere, and while technically this makes any cancellation news premature, the chances of the show being resuscitated at this point are unlikely. The decision to allow the contracts lapse means that the show's two leads, Ian McShane and Timothy Olyphant, as well as the stable of supporting players, have no further obligation to the critically adored show and are free to pursue other acting gigs. The news comes just three weeks after series creator and executive producer David Milch spoke to the Boston Globe and offered a decidedly different take on the fate of the show, which is set in the outlaw mining camp of Deadwood in the late 1870s. "There's a time when creative and commercial intentions coincide," Milch told the newspaper. "Then they diverge. If a series is successful, the commercial interest is in keeping it on, even after the creative interest is in ending it. "With Deadwood, my intention is to end at the end of the fourth season. I can't speak for anyone else, but that's where I'm getting off the bus." While Variety suggests that HBO may reverse itself and pick up Deadwood for one more season, Milch is already working with the cable network on a new project, John from Cincinnati. Barring any last-minute negotiation hitches, work is expected to begin soon on a pilot episode to the show, which is described as a "surf noir." Still Deadwood's apparent demise is a bit puzzling. Yes, the second-season premiere drew 2.8 million viewers--3 million fewer than the series premiere--but it still ranked as one of HBO's better performers last year. The show has proved a critical favorite, as well. At last September's Emmy Awards, the show racked up five trophies out of 11 nominations; McShane took home the 2005 Golden Globe as Best Actor in a Drama Series; the American Film Institute named the show one of the Top 10 TV programs of 2005; and the series took home a Peabody Award for excellence in media and television. In any event, the third and likely final 12-episode season kicks off June 11. http://www.eonline.com/News/Items/0,1,1901....html?rsslatest

alsobeingdeadsucks

I died on edjr's birthday. The man that loved me more than anyone else. I even know he cried when he found out I died. George Denis Patrick Carlin (May 12, 1937 – June 22, 2008) Have a happy New Year.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IWp9fL8ghDU

Sailing isn't a sport, sailing is a way to get somewhere. Riding a bus isn't a sport, why the fock should sailing be a sport?

Surprisingly good flick. I give it 3.5 out of 5. Adam Sandler did an amazing job of acting. Most guys that just have one schtick could never have pulled it off. "I'd like one adult and one f@ggot"

In 1991 edjr went to one of my shows and fell asleep too. He left saying it was one of the worst shows he had ever seen in his life. edjr later in life realized he was far too immature to understand my humor. the older edjr got, the more he appreciated what I had to say. it takes a certain sense of humor and wisdom to understand a lot of my comedy.

Are you going to dress up as Gallagher too?

Posty is completely humorless, what is your excuse?

I died at 5:55 PST this morning. I just wanted to say bye to one of my biggest fans in edjr. Keep reciting my jokes and keep my humor alive.

I knew $ome a$$bait wa$ going to $ay $omething $tupid like thi$

“If you can't beat them, arrange to have them beaten" “If God had intended us not to masturbate he would've made our arms shorter” “One can never know for sure what a deserted area looks like” “I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.” “Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesn't mean the circus has left town.” “Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity” “The reason I talk to myself is that I'm the only one whose answers I accept” “The very existence of flame-throwers proves that some time, somewhere, someone said to themselves, You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I'm just not close enough to get the job done.” “The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A Death! What's that, a bonus? I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first, get it out of the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you're too young, you get a gold watch, you go to work. You work forty years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement. You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you get ready for high school. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last nine months floating... ...and you finish off as an orgasm.”

I have just received conformation that edjr is going to do a lilttle speech in honor of me and will play some of his favorite clips during his DJ gig Wednesday night.

Are you kidding me? I didn't believe in god or religion. I am down here in hell hanging out with the debbil. He's a pretty cool cat.