zen

Everybody knows I'm training to be a cage fighter.

Working on a phillybear tip, I killed my mother-in-law.

Metallica. The latest album. I don't remember what it's called, I just mindlessly buy whatever crap comes out labeled "Metallica".

Henry Rollins and John Stewert are two of my personal heros.

He has talent, but lately, like Deniro, he's degenerated into a typecast parody of himself. ETA: that 9/11 thing was pretty crazy though.

The Dali Lama? He's hard to miss in the saffron robes and big 70s cop glasses.

This tough, because for all the people who say "The Pope" there will be tons of people like me who think he's a Hitler Youth freak. Though Clinton is respected wordwide, he's also despised by a lot of people. I'd say Bono from U2 is very respected worldwide. Not too many people badmouth him, even if they don't like his music. And even then, U2 has changed their sound so many times that you're bound to like some incarnation. That's all I got. Actually, there's some literary authors alive who are respected worldwide, but don't make much noise on the MTV/CNN screens. Gabriel Garcia Marquez is one that comes to mind.

Cruise, 100% Fadish Kabbalah Madonna, yep. But mid-90s Bondange Madonna was THE SH!T

I would never make such a crazy claim. I'm saying William Faulkner is better than Moses.

That's what you get growing up in Klan country. You should see this new book series out called "Harry Potter." It's about kid who summons the devil. First there's ###### sympathy, then there's British children playing with black magic. Has the world gone crazy?

H.P. Lovecraft was a total freak with a skin condition that made the sun intolerable. He lived in a basement and would only come out at night. He was also a Nazi sympathizer and blatent racist. Reread his stories sometime with this in mind (yes, in Cthulu) and you'll see exactly what I'm talking about. Decent writer though. Well, actually he was one of those writers who was very hot and cold: when he was on...he was very, very good. When he was off, his writing is gawd awful.

I was the one who said Santa and I said it as a JOKE. This it utter bullshit. There's no ###### way.

Selma Hayck bukkake. What do I win?

The correct answer is Jenna Jameson.

I might forgive this nancy-pure mockery of a rock band if I never had to hear them, except they go and rip the title of one of the best American novels ever and don't even have the gawd damn manners to list it alongside The ###### Bible as a favorite.

The Buddha. Far more recognizable than J.C. worldwide. There's crazy backwoods places in Asia that know that chubby guy who have no clue who J.C. is. Yet everyone in the Industrial West knows who Buddha is by sight. Either Buddha or Santa Claus. (it's buddha)

I've never once heard a cell phone go off in a movie theatre. I've heard them go off everywhere else, but a theatre seems pretty sacred. Plus attendents always remind you to turn it off before it starts. IF the film industry is looking to fix falling profits they might consider making original movies instead of lame remakes like The Poseidon Adventure or Miami Vice.

Maybe Dan should broaden his horizons a bit. You know, create an eye-friendly splash page that lists all the updates he posts in his news forums now, as well as links to his Craptastic Forum and Fantasy Football forum. He could even rename it and give it a new domain name, something like, oh I don't know, Fantasy Football Tomorrow or Fantasy Football Now or Your Facist Free Fantasy Football Forum (www.ffff.com). With his superior customer base, I bet he'd be atop the google rankings in no time flat. He could even hire some computer savvy bloke like Swerski to write up a real handy FF cheatsheet compiler for everyone's draft. I bet he could make some money off that. I bet he could make even more money with site advertising, you know, since he has such a large user base now. What do you guys think?

Mein Kampf A world where children are only allowed to read one book is a nazi-facist nightmare, so I might as well train the little bastard appropriately. ETA: I posted this without reading the thread. Holy crap someone else already picked Mein Kampf.

That wasn't very excellent of you. :reported:

In all fairness, thedanzone did leave that faux "HACKORED!!" message. I know that isn't evidence for Nick the Computer Guy, but for the regular people who go by what they read in computerland, it's a strong indicator. That was a prank. Of course a few people got suckered. That's what pranks do.

BTW, isn't this an attempt to circumvent the language filter?

The competition was fierce, but I have to agree. Dropping an Oprah reference started her in a hole and it only grew uglier from there. But in no way do I mean this to be insulting. Everyone has a bad day. You can't help it sometimes, or in this case, all the time.

Careful now, that could be seen as insulting. But I'm a good sport, so here's a helpful reminder of the new and improved forum rules. I link this not out of malicious intent, but out of a sincere desire to see you become a more excellent FFtoday poster.