parshall2marshall

There isn't one. It's known as "other"

Good one. Not exactly the first time I've heard it, but well-played nonetheless. Honestly, I walked into a department store to buy a pair of shoes for a wedding, and when some snotty-ass sales clerk asked what size I wore and I told them, he got huffy as hell and said that they only sold "normal" shoes. Called me a freak, essentially, which admittedly I am, but still, I was going to drop $100 and I believe he was on commission. But seriously on the clothing thing. Don't go there. There's few easier ways to pi$$ a woman off than getting her clothing size wrong. Buy too big, she'll say you think she's fat. Buy too small, she'll say that you're trying to tell her to lose weight. You'll be focked either way. HTH

My idea of special occasion gifts (I am, for the record, female): Birthday: Come over and watch a baseball game with me. Birthday gift? Buy the wings. Valentine's Day: Dumbest 'holiday' ever. Puts more pressure on guys than almost anything else. Nothing like incinuating to every man on the planet that if they don't buy their woman chocolate and jewelry that means they don't love them. Stupid. If you HAVE to do something for V-Day, take me to a basketball game if there's one. Otherwise, come over and watch one with me on television. Again, there's probably one on. Anniversary: Whatever. If there's a place that's meaningful around or something (first-date restaurant or the like), take me there. It's a sweet thing that shows you remembered. I wouldn't want anything in the way of a gift though. Just not that big of a deal to me. Christmas: Yeah, I'll probably expect a gift for this one. I'm confused as hell about the above-stated "rules" though. For me: -If I'm missing a CD from my collection, I'll be thrilled if you buy it for me. -If it's cashmere, I'll smile politely and think "When the HELL am I going to wear something like this. $hit, you can't even wash it." -If it is made of fabric, and cannot be put in the washing machine, don't buy it. Because I never wear crap like that unless it's for a very special occasion, and on the rare time I will wear something that has to be dry cleaned, I guarantee you it's something that I will want to pick out myself. -Here's a better idea, just don't buy me clothes, unless it's a t-shirt with one of my teams' logos or one of my favorite bands or something. Otherwise, you cannot know if the dress, skirt, or whatever is going to fit me, and quite honestly, you probably won't get something I like. Nice gesture, but go with something else. -Tiffany's = stupid. -Don't buy me shoes, especially designer ones. Not that the designer ones are really an issue, with size 12 giant feet their stuff wouldn't fit me if I did like it. But regardless, I wear sneakers, clogs, sandals, and the occasional well-chosen high heel. I don't need anything else. -Just because you recognize the name on the label, it doesn't make it a good gift. Not every girl likes Prada. Two words: Bull and sh!t. Take my advice: don't buy a woman clothing that is sized with a number. Just dont. Sizes vary widely from brand to brand, types of clothing, etc.. It's just not a bright idea. Now, if she's the type, you'll generally be able to make an educated guess on a t-shirt size (or anything that is sized by letter: S, M, L, etc.), or you may be able to sneak a look at a label in some of her clothing. But again, just don't try it with number-sized clothing: She probably wears a couple different sizes at the minimum, and odds are you won't guess right. And if you guess wrong (you probably will), she could find a way to take it as an insult (trust me, even if it's the most insane thing you've ever heard, with some girls there's almost always a way). And that means you won't "get any," which means it will end up being a pretty $hitty night for both of you. One final thing: findgift.com. You may not find the right thing, but you'll get ideas.

And if she's really pi$$ed at you, prepare to get the $hit knocked out of you.

About 15 sent. None recieved personally - was included as a footnote on some of my parents' cards.

The "Find X" looks like something I'd do. Doing the YMCA with the Jesus painting was wrong. Funny, but wrong.

My personal favorite Reminds me of my family.

Seeing the name "porkbutt" always gets a laugh from me. Tiki Barber's Barber is a good one, too.

Go to the store, buy a huge package of cookies, and then stuff them full of sleeping pills.

From aol.com:

Creedence Clearwater Revival.

Ugly as hell, but the most comfortable shoes I have ever worn. If you get them in black they aren't as bad.

"60% of the time, it works every time." And basically anything that Steve Carell said in the movie (Anchorman).

My God...it's an attractive woman who....eats! Seriously, it's nice to see someone (especially someone known for cooking) considered attractive and yet not on the verge of death. Drives me nucking futs to see a chef on TV prepare a 3,000 calorie meal and she looks like she weighs about 95 pounds. Seriously, if they're that skinny, they've got to suck at cooking in reality. Words of wisdom: Never trust a skinny chef.

1015 Perfect for the end of finals week; reminds me of Christmas with the family.

I have three debit cards, and no credit cards. I'll probably get a credit card before too long just so I can start establishing credit, but I've seen way too many people get sucked into a hole of debt by those things to actually use one without being able to pay it off immediately.

Just my 2 cents. I wouldn't mention why you are leaving; none of their business, IMO. Like I said, just my 2 cents as someone who has taken way too many English classes. Or, if you want to be more direct:

Tomlinson is the lone reason I finished only one game below .500 (only missed the playoffs by one game - two points, to be specific ). I didn't even have a half-decent QB until I got lucky and snagged Romo. My #2 running back sucked, too. And I lost 2 WRs to injury. </sob story> If you took Tomlinson out of my roster I would have probably set a new record for $hittiest team ever. In other news, I actually made the playoffs in a league where I had Shaun Alexander. That was thanks mostly to McNabb's good season until he got hurt, and thankfully having Brees as a backup.

nunchucks But only because the trident was already taken.

"I want to fock someone. I want to fock something. I want beer. I want to fock. I'm hungry. I want to fock. There's a football game tonight: I want to drink before the game and fock after the game. I want to fock. $hit, it's finals week - I need to find someone to tell me what the fock I've been sleeping through. Screw it, I just want to fock someone. I'm going to get so drunk after finals. I want to fock." There ya go.

That's terrible. Thoughts and prayers are with you, man.

I'm in a very similar situation. I have two older half-sisters from my father's previous marriage that I have never met, and I doubt they know I exsist. Thanks to my father having a very uncommon last name, I found the address and phone number of the older sister, and like you, don't know what to do. Best of luck, man.

Come on, this is the Geek board. You gotta have a "0" option.

41-39 WVU Final 3OT.