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sfw

I think it's a good story. I hope you will laugh and enjoy. It's better when I tell it in person. Last year, the owner of the company I work for, also the vice president, along with myself and my brother who also works for the company went to stay at the owners cabin in Upstate New York. We go every year and are all good friends. We also bring Richard with us. Richard has Downs Syndrome and has worked for my company for 12 years. Hes 44 years old and a really, really cool guy. He's a hard worker and you can hang with him, have a beer, talk about the Yankees, girls, etc. He has really become a good friend as well. I'm not saying he could ever drive a car of whatever but the guy is just so sweet. Anyhow, first day we bring Richard to the golf course with us and I offer to have him drive with me and offer to help him drive a cart, have some fun, etc. I enjoy treating him as normal as possible. After letting him drive from tee to green for a few holes, he's getting pretty good at it. After the 12th hole, I hop in the passenger seat (good buzz by this point) and writing the scores up. Richard drives and I look up quick and things seem fine. So, I just tell him to follow our friends not realizing there was an incredible steep hill to get to the next tee. I mean steep. They have two stop signs and two speed bumps to get you down the hill. I'm writing the score up and I hear my buddy in front yell "Be Careful" I look up and we are about to head down this hill at full speed. It's an asphalt path that is as skinny as enough for one cart, with a huge cliff on the left and mountain like terrain on the right. I yell for Richard to hit the breaks and he hits the gas. I'm telling you, we are flying down this hill and hit the first speed bump. We both hop out of our seats at least a foot and then sit back in awkward positions. I reach over with my left foot and slam on the brakes, which puts us in this huge, uncontrollable skid. We are now literally bouncing down this hill at major speed. Richard hits the gas pedal, which releases the brake and now we are at full speed again. The guys below are yelling at us and jumping out of their cart. My brother is by himself at the top, behind us screaming for us to slow down. We are probably 3 feet from going off the left cliff and down the embankment. I reach over and grab the steering wheel and yank it to the right. We do a 180 and then a quick left and we smash into this huge tree. It was probably a 30 foot tree that was 5 feet wide. I mean, we literally smashed directly into the center of the tree at full speed. We hit so hard that Richard, for some reason first bounced backwards at impact and then launched out of the drivers seat with a dive that looked like Superman taking off. I bounced into the plastic window and snapped back, basically unscathed. Following Richards decent, he lands in the middle of the path, down the hill into a giant mud puddle. At that point, because we had hit the tree so hard, a large limb falls from the tree and lands about 3 feet from Richard. It may not have killed him but certainly would have knocked him out. My boss comes running up the hill with the most scared look I have ever seen on somebody. Richard stands up, his legs all scratched and slightly bloody, completely covered in mud from head to toe, with both hands in the air like he was an Olympic gymnast. He's like "I'm alright" "Don't worry". The remaining guys all meet at my cart in this major "Holy sh!t, I have never seen that before sort of thing happen before, first with panic and making sure we were alright and then with the most incredible laughing fit that any 5 guys had ever had. I'm telling you......looking at Richard covered in mud and seeing our golf cart dented in 3 feet in the front as it's jammed into the tree...we just broke out in laughter. We just couldn't stop laughing the remainder of the round and into the next two days. My brother and I just kept laughing all night long. It was so focking funny man. Anyhow, hope you enjoyed it. By the way, we pulled the dents out and just returned the cart and ran to our cars. No issues.

Hey geek brothers. I haven't been here in years. Hows everything going here? Anything new?

You sir...are a magnificent bastard.

He saved lives dammit!

Hey Giants Fan! Has anybody else realized that the letter in Infant Gas are the same as in Giants Fan?

I think you may have gotten it from NewGirl.

Hey Old Maid. You know, in all my years here, I never once had an alias. I am who I am.

I think about him now and then. Is he still here? I have evolved quite a bit since I was jerky to him.

LMFAO! That's great Chronic. I don't even remember telling that story here. It's still the funniest thing that has ever happened to me. Feels good to back. Thanks

Ha! I know...I was thinking Spencer was going down about two minutes after they went off the air. He just kept spinning and spinning in circles. GM must win this hands down. They wanted her to win it, I think. Also, I'm guessing that she would take Andy with her and she should be able to beat Andy. So....congrats you obnoxious, but recently more likable, chick from New Yawk. You hung in there and got a win.

I absolutely love this song and the video! I think it's freaking awesome.

Still sad thinking about it. I was next to my secretary after the first tower was hit and she was on the phone with her husband who was working in the second tower. She was telling him to get out and I was on the phone with my wife, listening to this woman talk to her husband. My wife says "Oh my God, another plane hit the other tower" and at the same time, I hear my secretary going "honey....honey.......?" His phone goes dead. She looks at me and I tell her that the building got hit. Holy crap. So scary. Good news is that the guy got out before it collapsed.

Thurman Munson. The guy was awesome. Tough as heck.

Yeah......hard to believe you call bet after bet from her with K7 and still lose. You sir....are an idiot.

Her best meal? Pork chops.........and apple sauce. That sounds swell.

Took me a minute. Well done. I laughed out loud.

Amanda is a full fledged, psychotic person with sociopathic tendencies. Seeing her blow up over the next few weeks will be some of the best television ever. Just watching her each week is like taking a class in sociopathic behavior and seeing it first hand. She is an awful person and very easy to figure out. She's pure evil and I cannot wait to see her break down. I guarantee you that it will be something to behold.

The Galloping Gourmet. or The Frugal Gourmet (Before the child molesting started)

So. you think I'm funny? Cool

Shopping for a spouse?

If I have to pull this car over........

website is www.whyiliedaboutsavinglivesonseptember11.com