BunnysBastatrds

I always wanted to turn her over and eat her like a popsicle.

So we bought a house that was completely renovated in a great neighborhood. Been here for a few years and NEVER had a bug problem. About six months ago German roaches started to appear. Couldn’t figure out why. I started spraying that good roach killer from Home Depot. Supposedly the same chemicals a professional uses.It gradually got worse. So I called a friend who owns a reputable company I’ve known for forty years. He comes out and sets baits and sprays in all the right places. A month later we still have these German roaches. he comes back the other day.and sets more bait and sprays. As I’m writing this check he asks if we get many Amazon deliveries. Wifey: At least three a week. Why? BugGuy: Their shipping warehouse is infested with them. My parents house is a nightmare. I would open your packages on the front porch, inspect the product, and throw the boxes immediately into the trash.

Thought they were Jewish from…

Saw them here in 88 for their first big tour at the UNO Lakefront Arena. This girl Julie (34C) and her boyfriend John Holmes gave me an extra ticket last minute. We rushed the stage and we’re front and center. This kick boxer, Kelly, was screaming “Fawk Yeahhh” when they started the show. Th singer hawks a big Jew loogey and spits right in his face. Missed me like the majic bullet. Kelly was trying to get on stage and kill him. Took three guards to get him out. To funny.

Nice. Yes, us Cajuns still do that. We are number 2 All of them. I’m a hoarder and fan. It’s why I became a PI. I think Tanya will be waiting for me in hell naked, a baseball bat, and a bottle of Hot Damn.I’d tie her skates any day. Here’s to looking up your address It will be sincere. I’d whisper sweet nothings ing your ear with a bullhorn. The Tupperware is for the monsoon season. I’m sending you a fritter. HTH

Yes. We don’t. Tell you what. I’ve got some Nancy Drew books, a flashlight, a urine pan I took as a souvenir from my last detox. I’d like to send them to you. What’s your address? I’ll use the leftover boxes and packages in the discarded Amazon boxes with a love note and a set of scratch resistant Tupperware containers.

And???

I can skip around the bases, if you like me.

pits a pork chop.

I’m watching myself in the reflection of the universe drinking another beer and wondering about tomorrows solar eclipse.

I know. That height limit requirements must have been devastating to you. How dare they discriminate against your vertical challenges. You should have called your congressman and makes laws to supply you with platform shoes on the taxpayers dime.

This scene always makes me shudder. Poltergeist was a cakewalk. This was not…

The treatment has started working. We caught it early.. Spread the word. Nasty fawkers. Also, I advise to get those blue light plug ins with the changeable strips. They work for most bugs. And glue traps for mice. The smaller ones. Put them in areas you see them. Put peanut butter in the middle. They get stuck as soon as they touch it. Happy hunting and killing.

I’m still drinking, so yes.

Ms Mace, I can’t come to the chalk board right now. I will come after school and pound, uhmmm, erasers.

Sloppy seconds.

Deep Thoughts With BunnysBastards I was perplexed, as to what to get my chunky chick for X-Mas. So I went to Hobby Lobby.. Spent an hours roaming the store. It smelled like beautiful bagina. Like a Victoria Secret catalog. I got so horribly horny I went into the changing room with a copy of a nude Picasso. Then I went and ate Churches. Deep Thoughts By BunnysBastards