Jimmy Kimmel Delighted To Finally Talk To Someone He Can Make Laugh

[seafoam1 3,056]

 

 

LOS ANGELES, CA — Several staff members of Jimmy Kimmel Live! reported that their boss was "absolutely delighted" after he finally got someone on his show to laugh during last night's interview with Vice-President Kamala Harris.

According to the scarred, weeping members of the audience who had actually managed to sit through the entire show, Kimmel was "positively elated" after hearing several of his jokes greeted by Vice-President Harris' nerve-wracking, trauma-inducing cackle.

"So, let's talk about reproductive rights," Kimmel had begun to say, only to be interrupted by an avalanche of hyena-like laughter from the Vice president. "HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! Reproductive rights! YES!" she had exclaimed.

 

"He was like a little kid in a candy store," recalled show writer Gina Blanchette with a shudder. "Every time that…that awful, horsey laugh sounded, his face would just light up from all of the positive affirmation. He hasn't had anyone laugh on the show in about four and a half years now, so this is just huge for him. He's already been talking about inviting her back for the last 18 hours or so, but a lot of the videographers are demanding hazard pay and we can't find anyone willing to sit in the audience, even with earplugs."

When asked for comment, Vice-President Harris started laughing hysterically for an uncomfortable amount of time before launching into an explanation of what a late-night TV show is and how it differs from a late-late-night TV show.

At publishing time, Kimmel had been seen watching replays of the interview and giggling with joy every time Harris laughed at something he said.

 

[Voltaire 5,317]

A produce had brought his fat, gumpy, insecure eight year old son to meet the vice-president. Then backstage, just before going live, they'd just tricked the kid into getting his d1ck cut off.

"So, let's talk about reproductive rights," Kimmel had begun to say, only to be interrupted by an avalanche of hyena-like laughter from the Vice president. "HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! Reproductive rights! YES!" she had exclaimed.

[Gepetto 1,370]

Kimmel is NOT funny, at all. As bad as Jay Leno.