I Got Pulled Over At Epcot Driving A Scooter By A Flashlight Security Guard

[BunnysBastatrds 2,440]

So since I fractured my ankle last year I have trouble getting around walking long distances. I rented a green scooter for eighty bucks to get around. After all the walking at the Spankees games, today was Disney day with my Lady.. So me and my beautiful Queen are tooling around. My ankle looks like a grapefruit. Early on we stopped at an Irish pub. Three snake bites and a few Irish whiskeys, we went to a few restaurants and rides. I set the scooter at 4 as to not get into trouble. Buzzing is an understatement. I kept asking the grey hairs if they wanted to race. I lost a couple of times and their husbands would give me the fawking stink eyes. So I’m having a blast. Handicap shiot for brains that I am and somewhat intoxicated Bunny ran into the back of another scooter.  A small tap. Apologize and thought we were good. Till flash light security pulled me over. I kept thinking about getting a DUI at fawking Epcot on this scooter. 
 

 Everything was handled and no foul. Place was packed. So I parked my scooter at the next bar to watch the fireworks show at 9:00. Before the show started, I went looking for my scooter and found the wrong scooter. Didn’t realize it till wifey says “That’s not your scooter. Yours is right there a block away. It’s got our map in the basket and your name on the front. I found mine where she said it was. I started to go back and forgot where I found it and the was starting. I said to myself, Fawk it and left it outside the pub and watched the fireworks with my lady and drank a shot of whiskey whilst enjoying da sites of the night. Great fireworks show. Then bounced and brought mine back to get the deposit and got on the skyl lift and laughed hoping it wasn’t some fat old granny with a knee replacement issue. Ooops. A Daisy.

 

[seafoam1 3,022]

In college I got pulled over by a cruiser for speeding. I was riding my bicycle. Got an "official" warning. That's about it.

[bostonlager 2,665]

I haven't had a snake-bite in over 10 years. That's a good idea. 

[BunnysBastatrds 2,440]

 I’m learning this morning how I ate nachos in Mexico an hour earlier and drank saki in Japan and threw up said nachos all over the scooter and my right foot. Fun fun.

[BunnysBastatrds 2,440]

 Disney Orlando is the cleanest place I’ve ebt den. Immaculate grounds, architecture and food. Every one I met was so nice. Except for this phat broad I cut in front of on her scooter. I blew her kisses while she shot me the birdie.

[jerryskids 6,795]

12 hours ago, bostonlager said:

I haven't had a snake-bite in over 10 years. That's a good idea. 

I had never heard of it, needed to look it up.

Quote

This classic British beertail mixes equal parts lager and apple cider in a pint glass.

Sounds... kinda weird.   

[bostonlager 2,665]

1 minute ago, jerryskids said:

I had never heard of it, needed to look it up.

Sounds... kinda weird.   

This is what I was referring to 

 

• 2 ounces Yukon Jack

• Splash to 1/2 ounce lime cordial, to taste

[jerryskids 6,795]

7 minutes ago, bostonlager said:

This is what I was referring to 

 

• 2 ounces Yukon Jack

• Splash to 1/2 ounce lime cordial, to taste

Ahh... I saw that one too, but most of the search results were for the one I listed.

I'm not sure I've had Yukon Jack... Canadian whiskey and honey?  Is it like Jack Daniel's Tennessee Honey?  If so, that stuff is pretty good.

[bostonlager 2,665]

1 minute ago, jerryskids said:

Ahh... I saw that one too, but most of the search results were for the one I listed.

I'm not sure I've had Yukon Jack... Canadian whiskey and honey?  Is it like Jack Daniel's Tennessee Honey?  If so, that stuff is pretty good.

The honey taste isn’t in your face like JD, a little more subtle but same neighborhood 

[jerryskids 6,795]

56 minutes ago, bostonlager said:

The honey taste isn’t in your face like JD, a little more subtle but same neighborhood 

Thanks.  I just checked out Total Wine -- $18 for a fifth (I was hoping for a smaller bottle to try, but...) and gets a 4.8 in the reviews.  I think I'll give it a whirl, after Lent since I gave up whiskey.   

[shorepatrol 1,870]

2 hours ago, bostonlager said:

 

 

•  Yukon Jack

•  

That sh!t got me in a world class barfight over 20 years ago. Don't remember leaving the bar after. Woke up in my buddies front yard under a cargo blanket when my wife found me 

[kutulu 1,676]

tl:dr

hopefully you focked some chick you call...

 

 

[seafoam1 3,022]

1 hour ago, kutulu said:

tl:dr

hopefully you focked some chick you call...