What is most important to women

[krista4 0]

Thank you for chiming in. I think I was getting killed here!!!

 

Nah, you were killin' and didn't need my help, but you're welcome.

[Red White and Blue 0]

Well since this thread is all sensitive and stuff ...

 

I need to date someone who's smart and someone who shares my interests - reading, movies, follows the news. I think it's really weird when people just don't read. I can do without dating someone who's into sports, I'd rather watch the game w/ my guy friends anyway, but I've dated girls who don't just not like sports - they think they're stupid and almost look down on people who like them. I'm not having that anymore.

 

It's also really important to me to date someone who has her own life. I need a lot of personal time and space and can't stand it when someone calls me everyday. It helps if whoever I'm dating and I can do things together without interrupting each other, like if I bring work home or I'm cooking or whatever she can read or watch TV, do her thing. We're together but not up each other's asses.

 

I don't have to date a model but she's got to be cute. And I think sexually chemistry is just something you have or don't have. I've been in relationships with girls who just aren't into experimenting or want sex more/less than I do, whatever. I think either you naturally are compatible in bed or you're not, and I wouldn't waste my time w/ someone if we weren't.

 

I'd never have said this 5-10 years ago but I couldn't date someone who doesn't get along with my friends and family.

 

There may be one more.

[sawilson 1]

This list seems a lot more real to me.

And there is nothing wrong with this list. Its esentially saying she wantes someone who cares about her and others. I agree with that!

 

I'm not saying that I don't want a guy that is going to care about me and want to spend time with me, I just said I don't want someone who wants to spend ALL his time with me. And I am sure that BEG would agree with this.

[dolfan06 1]

Longtime lurker, infrequent poster. I spend almost all my time at another site. Sadly, I've been over here reading a lot lately because I've become sickly fascinating with the CurlyNight controversy. Saw this thread and just had to back you up, though. It's nice to see such confidence from another woman!

 

When a woman says that she likes sports and wants a guy to do guy things, why is that considered confidence? What if some of the guy things that he likes to do include masturbating to internet porn all day, or taking 2-month-long hiking trips to Australia by himself? What if he kept doing that kind of stuff 10, 15 years into the relationship? Do you really consider it a sign of confidence to support stuff like that, or would you want him to change some of his habits so he could fit better into a real grown-up relationship?

[Brad GLuckman 518]

I haven't read one thing from one of you girls I haven't heard 10 times before from women I've dated...before we started dating....then the relationship gets going and the girl just freakin loses it

[sawilson 1]

Well since this thread is all sensitive and stuff ...

 

I need to date someone who's smart and someone who shares my interests - reading, movies, follows the news. I think it's really weird when people just don't read. I can do without dating someone who's into sports, I'd rather watch the game w/ my guy friends anyway, but I've dated girls who don't just not like sports - they think they're stupid and almost look down on people who like them. I'm not having that anymore.

 

It's also really important to me to date someone who has her own life. I need a lot of personal time and space and can't stand it when someone calls me everyday. It helps if whoever I'm dating and I can do things together without interrupting each other, like if I bring work home or I'm cooking or whatever she can read or watch TV, do her thing. We're together but not up each other's asses.

 

I don't have to date a model but she's got to be cute. And I think sexually chemistry is just something you have or don't have. I've been in relationships with girls who just aren't into experimenting or want sex more/less than I do, whatever. I think either you naturally are compatible in bed or you're not, and I wouldn't waste my time w/ someone if we weren't.

 

I'd never have said this 5-10 years ago but I couldn't date someone who doesn't get along with my friends and family.

 

There may be one more.

 

Gee -- this could be construed as "what a guy thinks a woman would want to hear" as well.....

[Jessy 0]

but I've dated girls who don't just not like sports - they think they're stupid and almost look down on people who like them. I'm not having that anymore.

 

Or people who don't watch TV and think they're better than you. Fuckers.

[sawilson 1]

I haven't read one thing from one of you girls I haven't heard 10 times before from women I've dated...before we started dating....then the relationship gets going and the girl just freakin loses it

Well, guess you've been dating the wrong women then haven't you...

 

 

 

Or people who don't watch TV and think they're better than you. Fuckers.

[Brad GLuckman 518]

Well, guess you've been dating the wrong women then haven't you...

 

And even married one of em

[sawilson 1]

And even married one of em

So sorry for you.

 

You shoulda figured that out before you put the ring on her finger I guess...

 

BTW - hows that workin for yah?

[krista4 0]

When a woman says that she likes sports and wants a guy to do guy things, why is that considered confidence? What if some of the guy things that he likes to do include masturbating to internet porn all day, or taking 2-month-long hiking trips to Australia by himself? What if he kept doing that kind of stuff 10, 15 years into the relationship? Do you really consider it a sign of confidence to support stuff like that, or would you want him to change some of his habits so he could fit better into a real grown-up relationship?

Pretty simple--I never said that the "sports" and "guy things" were what indicated confidence. There were a few things to me that signaled confidence--among them that she wants to have her own life and to have someone who was himself independent. I think it takes a certain amount of confidence, perhaps particularly from a woman (as I regrettably will probably agree that women can be more clingy), not to be worried or concerned if your partner doesn't seem to want to be with you all the time or has a happy and fulfilled life outside of you. That, to me, takes maturity as well and is developed over time.

[Brown Eyed Girl 1]

I'm not saying that I don't want a guy that is going to care about me and want to spend time with me, I just said I don't want someone who wants to spend ALL his time with me. And I am sure that BEG would agree with this.

 

We're definitely on the same page here, Saw...

 

I love my free time. I think everyone needs to spend time to themselves, with their own friends, just having a sense of 'self', so to say.

 

Although, I failed to list this... I absolutely agree with it being a very important factor to any relationship.

[Brad GLuckman 518]

BTW - hows that workin for yah?

 

If you can tell I get a little worked up by the whole topic...going through a divorce.

 

So one month after we get married she starts the following crap:

She wants me to ask her permission to drink a beer

She doesn't want me hanging out with my friends unless she is there

She doesn't want me to go wakeboarding with my friends because I might see a girl in a bikini and check her out

She wants me to spend $5K on a bigger diamond for her engagement ring

She wants us to move to a bigger house, costing $100K

She only wants to hang out with her family, more specifically her parents as she thinks her dad is a good influence on me

That's just the start...and I am not kidding when I tell you none of this crap was a problem before we got married...but then she had to try and change me..no ######, this girl looked like a freaking barbie doll. Absolutley gorgeous. But the most insecure girl I've ever met in my life...now she's trying to take my house.

[dolfan06 1]

And there is nothing wrong with this list. Its esentially saying she wantes someone who cares about her and others. I agree with that!

 

I'm not saying that I don't want a guy that is going to care about me and want to spend time with me, I just said I don't want someone who wants to spend ALL his time with me. And I am sure that BEG would agree with this.

 

Well duh, everyone needs to have some time for themselves to pursue individual interests. I guess the question is, how do you stay on the same page with someone when, in your view, it starts to seem like their time to themselves is taking precedence over time with you?

[Jessy 0]

If you can tell I get a little worked up by the whole topic...going through a divorce.

 

So one month after we get married she starts the following crap:

She wants me to ask her permission to drink a beer

She doesn't want me hanging out with my friends unless she is there

She doesn't want me to go wakeboarding with my friends because I might see a girl in a bikini and check her out

She wants me to spend $5K on a bigger diamond for her engagement ring

She wants us to move to a bigger house, costing $100K

She only wants to hang out with her family, more specifically her parents as she thinks her dad is a good influence on me

That's just the start...and I am not kidding when I tell you none of this crap was a problem before we got married...but then she had to try and change me..no ######, this girl looked like a freaking barbie doll. Absolutley gorgeous. But the most insecure girl I've ever met in my life...now she's trying to take my house.

 

If I ever think about getting married, I'm going to ask my friends to just go ahead and kill me if I start acting like that.

[Brown Eyed Girl 1]

I haven't read one thing from one of you girls I haven't heard 10 times before from women I've dated...before we started dating....then the relationship gets going and the girl just freakin loses it

 

It may depend on how old the girls you are dating might be. Please don't take offense to that. I only meant that a woman who is more mature and pretty much knows what she wants in a relationship most likely is not going to be into all of that silly game playing that younger girls (who have not quite determined what they want) fall into.

JMO

[sawilson 1]

Pretty simple--I never said that the "sports" and "guy things" were what indicated confidence. There were a few things to me that signaled confidence--among them that she wants to have her own life and to have someone who was himself independent. I think it takes a certain amount of confidence, perhaps particularly from a woman (as I regrettably will probably agree that women can be more clingy), not to be worried or concerned if your partner doesn't seem to want to be with you all the time or has a happy and fulfilled life outside of you. That, to me, takes maturity as well and is developed over time.

Well said!!

[Brad GLuckman 518]

If I ever think about getting married, I'm going to ask my friends to just go ahead and kill me if I start acting like that.

 

Seriously. Before, we had so much fun too. Partied all the time, had lots of friends, vacations, once we got married...BAM! it all stopped...we had to be "grown up now"...

[krista4 0]

Well duh, everyone needs to have some time for themselves to pursue individual interests. I guess the question is, how do you stay on the same page with someone when, in your view, it starts to seem like their time to themselves is taking precedence over time with you?

 

I have to say that I haven't worked out this balance consistently in every relationship I've been in...it's very difficult, to say the least. It's a bit of an individual thing, too, as everyone's capacity for independence and need for space is a bit different, isn't it?

[sawilson 1]

We're definitely on the same page here, Saw...

 

I love my free time. I think everyone needs to spend time to themselves, with their own friends, just having a sense of 'self', so to say.

 

Although, I failed to list this... I absolutely agree with it being a very important factor to any relationship.

Thank you, thank you, thank you BEG!!

 

See - these type of women DO exist thank you very much!

[Brad GLuckman 518]

It may depend on how old the girls you are dating might be. Please don't take offense to that. I only meant that a woman who is more mature and pretty much knows what she wants in a relationship most likely is not going to be into all of that silly game playing that younger girls (who have not quite determined what they want) fall into.

JMO

 

Oh, no offense taken, I totally agree. I'm only 25, so you know...there's still some immaturity there...on their part, not mine...I'm perfect

[sawilson 1]

If you can tell I get a little worked up by the whole topic...going through a divorce.

 

So one month after we get married she starts the following crap:

She wants me to ask her permission to drink a beer

She doesn't want me hanging out with my friends unless she is there

She doesn't want me to go wakeboarding with my friends because I might see a girl in a bikini and check her out

She wants me to spend $5K on a bigger diamond for her engagement ring

She wants us to move to a bigger house, costing $100K

She only wants to hang out with her family, more specifically her parents as she thinks her dad is a good influence on me

That's just the start...and I am not kidding when I tell you none of this crap was a problem before we got married...but then she had to try and change me..no ######, this girl looked like a freaking barbie doll. Absolutley gorgeous. But the most insecure girl I've ever met in my life...now she's trying to take my house.

Wow dude, you DEFINITELY married the wrong lady.

 

Guess I could see how you could be defensive when it comes to this then.

 

Well, the good news is, is that not ALL women are like this! Here's to you finding another who isn't

 

Well duh, everyone needs to have some time for themselves to pursue individual interests. I guess the question is, how do you stay on the same page with someone when, in your view, it starts to seem like their time to themselves is taking precedence over time with you?

Now that's where compromise would come in.

 

All I am saying is for me I want a guy who could go chill with his friends same as I could go chill with mine - separately without ALWAYS having to be together. Go do your guy things and let me do my girl things and we will be just fine.

[cgod 0]

Reading this thread while I sit here on the couch in my beer and food stained t-shirt, scratching myself, belching loudly something I came to grips with long ago is only reaffirmed.....I will never make a woman happy.

[sawilson 1]

Reading this thread while I sit here on the couch in my beer and food stained t-shirt, scratching myself, belching loudly something I came to grips with long ago is only reaffirmed.....I will never make a woman happy.

Hey there blue eyes. Good to see you around.

[dolfan06 1]

All I am saying is for me I want a guy who could go chill with his friends same as I could go chill with mine - separately without ALWAYS having to be together. Go do your guy things and let me do my girl things and we will be just fine.

 

Well if my wife's girl things included mud-wrestling and throwing lingerie parties and whatnot I'd have to insist on chaperoning.

[sawilson 1]

Well if my wife's girl things included mud-wrestling and throwing lingerie parties and whatnot I'd have to insist on chaperoning.

Would picture suffice???

[Brown Eyed Girl 1]

Oh, no offense taken, I totally agree. I'm only 25, so you know...there's still some immaturity there...on their part, not mine...I'm perfect

 

Of course!

 

Seriously, though... when I was 25, I was very different from the person I am today. I just have a much different perspective and outlook on what I want in my life and what I think is right for me now as opposed to what I 'thought' I needed back then.

[naomi 343]

I'd answer this, it's actually been defined really recently. But as mulletia might say, it would be really Christy.

[cgod 0]

Hey there blue eyes. Good to see you around.

Good to be seen around.

[Guest Black Label Society]

Why do you say that???

 

To sum it up:

-I want a man who can fix shiot

-Who can help support a family

-Who is decent looking and taller and larger than me

-Who is a real dude who likes sports (especially football) because I do too

-Who does NOT make me his life nor want himself to be mine. Been there, done that, and its crap and never works out.

 

How is this not believable?

 

Would it help if I said that it would be great if he knew how to pamper a woman ever once in a while? A nice foot rub and back rub helps?

 

Well, Stacey (did I get it right this time??) I am EXACTLY that person. Too bad you live in Washington and I live in MN.

 

A. I can fix ANYTHING...cars, plumbing, electrical, roof, siding, any engine...you name it.

B. I am not rich, but I make enough to support a family, even if my wife did not want to work.

C. I am good looking. Not great, but definately above average.

D. I play softball, volleyball and have forgotten more about football than most humans should know.

E. I can ignore ya and go out drinking with the boys.....NO PROBLEM.

F. I have an above 'average' unit.

G. I give better BODY rubs than you can imagine.

H. I write poems, surprise women (before they become complete biches) with flowers, mystery dates, etc.

I. I smoke (want terribly to quit) and I'm opinionated, and sometimes I WILL tell you exactly what I'm thinking.

[Brown Eyed Girl 1]

I'm opinionated, and sometimes I WILL tell you exactly what I'm thinking.

 

I like this one. I think that if a man can be real and honest with me that means that he trusts me.

I would have so much respect for a man who could tell me his true feelings from his heart... no mix on words, just the straight end of it.

 

Regardless of whether it's something I want to hear or not.

That would be a real man in my eyes.

 

Also, another huge turn on (while we're on the subject) is a man who is strong and protecting - would stand up for me and defend my honor to others and yet be equally as gentle and tender with me.

[cgod 0]

I like this one. I think that if a man can be real and honest with me that means that he trusts me.

I would have so much respect for a man who could tell me his true feelings from his heart... no mix on words, just the straight end of it.

 

Regardless of whether it's something I want to hear or not.

That would be a real man in my eyes.

Does that include something along the lines of, "Yes, as a matter of fact, those jeans DO make you look a little chunky."?

[sawilson 1]

Well, Stacey (did I get it right this time??) I am EXACTLY that person. Too bad you live in Washington and I live in MN.

 

A. I can fix ANYTHING...cars, plumbing, electrical, roof, siding, any engine...you name it.

B. I am not rich, but I make enough to support a family, even if my wife did not want to work.

C. I am good looking. Not great, but definately above average.

D. I play softball, volleyball and have forgotten more about football than most humans should know.

E. I can ignore ya and go out drinking with the boys.....NO PROBLEM.

F. I have an above 'average' unit.

G. I give better BODY rubs than you can imagine.

H. I write poems, surprise women (before they become complete biches) with flowers, mystery dates, etc.

I. I smoke (want terribly to quit) and I'm opinionated, and sometimes I WILL tell you exactly what I'm thinking.

First NO!!!! You did not get it right. LOL

 

A. - Sweet, this is important

B. - A nice additional income is nice - don't want a mooch

C. - Hum - wouldn't know, dont' think I've seen a pic

D. - Forgotten more about football is not such a great thing

E. - Ignoring is different than just going out with the guys you know.

F. - See C

G. - This would be REALLY nice

H. - Most guys do - at the beginning of a relationship

I. - Same here on both accounts. And I will generally tell you what I am thinking too, even if you don't always like it.

 

But - its also very important to me that someone actually KNOWS my name

[cgod 0]

First NO!!!! You did not get it right. LOL

 

A. - Sweet, this is important

B. - A nice additional income is nice - don't want a mooch

C. - Hum - wouldn't know, dont' think I've seen a pic

D. - Forgotten more about football is not such a great thing

E. - Ignoring is different than just going out with the guys you know.

F. - See C

G. - This would be REALLY nice

H. - Most guys do - at the beginning of a relationship

I. - Same here on both accounts. And I will generally tell you what I am thinking too, even if you don't always like it.

 

But - its also very important to me that someone actually KNOWS my name

In fairness to BLS, he does know it, just not how to spell it.

[Brown Eyed Girl 1]

Does that include something along the lines of, "Yes, as a matter of fact, those jeans DO make you look a little chunky."?

 

Yes, believe it or not it does!

 

Just as I want to know that when he tells me that I look nice, that he means it and isn't just saying so out of obligation or because he feels he can earn points by doing so. It also indicates to me what he likes to see me in or how he likes me to do my hair or whatever it is he's complimenting.

 

I think it's important to let your partner know what you like about them. This doesn't mean that the things you don't like need to be changed, though.

[BMoney 0]

Also, another huge turn on (while we're on the subject) is a man who is strong and protecting - would stand up for me and defend my honor to others

 

 

thats an important thing..the neighborhood around the local Jack in the Box can be a lil rowdy sometime!!

 

welcome back to matchmaker monday everyone!! better hurry up and hook up while you can, the football season starts thursday and this site will go down quicker than Paris Hilton at an awards show after party...

[Guest Black Label Society]

First NO!!!! You did not get it right. LOL

 

A. - Sweet, this is important

B. - A nice additional income is nice - don't want a mooch

C. - Hum - wouldn't know, dont' think I've seen a pic

D. - Forgotten more about football is not such a great thing

E. - Ignoring is different than just going out with the guys you know.

F. - See C

G. - This would be REALLY nice

H. - Most guys do - at the beginning of a relationship

I. - Same here on both accounts. And I will generally tell you what I am thinking too, even if you don't always like it.

 

But - its also very important to me that someone actually KNOWS my name

 

It is 'Stacie, Stacy, Stacey' right?????????

I am by no means a mooch. I'm much too proud to mooch.

Trust me......I'm not a model, but I do believe I'm decent looking.

Uh...ignoring was a joke.....sarcasm is my middle name.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not gonna make a horse blush.....but it's above average (and I'm WELL aware of how to use it...oh and I can lick my eyebrow.)

I treat people how I am treated and how I'd like to be treated. Don't abuse my generosity, and some lucky girl will swear I'm not for real. I can swoop any woman off her feet. But I don't do it for anyone.

[sawilson 1]

In fairness to BLS, he does know it, just not how to spell it.

OK - I'll give him that much.

 

It is 'Stacie, Stacy, Stacey' right?????????

I am by no means a mooch. I'm much too proud to mooch.

Trust me......I'm not a model, but I do believe I'm decent looking.

Uh...ignoring was a joke.....sarcasm is my middle name.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not gonna make a horse blush.....but it's above average (and I'm WELL aware of how to use it...oh and I can lick my eyebrow.)

I treat people how I am treated and how I'd like to be treated. Don't abuse my generosity, and some lucky girl will swear I'm not for real. I can swoop any woman off her feet. But I don't do it for anyone.

First, neither of the three. LOL Nice try though.

 

And the rest sounds about right on. The eyebrow thing is pretty interesting too!!

 

So, the million dollar question would then be, why aren't you hooked up then?

[Fervid Ro 0]

The most important thing to me is that a man is honest.

[sawilson 1]

The most important thing to me is that a man is honest.

This is definitely a plus