Grammar Police needed

[TD Ryan2 315]

This sentence is terrible.

 

To be the poster of choice for all forums and discussion boards requiring hilarity and fun by starting the best threads and reporting heavy-set.

 

It Kills my ears but what's the acutal grammar rule(s) being destroyed here?

[nikki2200 4]

This sentence is terrible.

 

To be the poster of choice for all forums and discussion boards requiring hilarity and fun by starting the best threads and reporting heavy-set.

 

It Kills my ears but what's the acutal grammar rule(s) being destroyed here?

 

 

There is no verb and needs a few commas.

 

Edit:

There's kind of a verb in to be, but there is no Subject.

 

I think that's the problem.

 

Also it needs commas.

[MDC 5,934]

This sentence is terrible.

 

To be the poster of choice for all forums and discussion boards requiring hilarity and fun by starting the best threads and reporting heavy-set.

 

It Kills my ears but what's the acutal grammar rule(s) being destroyed here?

 

This sounds like it's a goal or something?

 

Goal: To become the poster of choice for all forums discussion boards that require hilarity and fun, by starting the best threads and reporting heavy-set.

 

That sentence still sucks but it's slightly better, I think.

[TD Ryan2 315]

This sounds like it's a goal or something?

 

Goal: To become the poster of choice for all forums discussion boards that require hilarity and fun, by starting the best threads and reporting heavy-set.

 

That sentence still sucks but it's slightly better, I think.

 

yup.

work thing... I know the sentence suxor but before I can politely suggest that the CEO's Sentence suxor, I better have some solid grammar rules backing me up.

 

just a comma helps? really?

[jerryskids 5,304]

I'd go with "heavy-set sucks a bag of cacks."

[TD Ryan2 315]

I'd go with "heavy-set sucks a bag of cacks."

it's my backup but with all plurals

 

"heavy-set sucks bags of cacks"

 

and all those S's on the ends give it a alliterative effect

[MDC 5,934]

yup.

work thing... I know the sentence suxor but before I can politely suggest that the CEO's Sentence suxor, I better have some solid grammar rules backing me up.

 

just a comma helps? really?

 

I think the change from "requiring" to "that require" improves that sentence a lot. Even better would be splitting it into two shorter, clearer sentences:

 

Goal: To become the poster of choice for all forums discussion boards that require hilarity and fun. I plan to meet this challenge by starting the best threads and reporting heavy-set.

 

The biggest problem with the first sentence was that it was run-on and tried to include too much info in one sentence, not any grammatical problem.

 

Does that help?

[TD Ryan2 315]

Does that help?

 

yup. thanks.

 

not sure I have this whole thing solved, but at least I know I'm not crazy thinking this sentence suxor.

[MedStudent 56]

That thing is a mess. Not sure about grammar rules but it needs rewriting. Why do you need to say all forums and discussion boards. Can't you just say discussion bored and forums will be implied. I would say it like this:

 

Goal: To start the best threads and report heavy-set thereby, becoming the poster of choice on all fun and hillarious discussion boards.

[MDC 5,934]

yup. thanks.

 

not sure I have this whole thing solved, but at least I know I'm not crazy thinking this sentence suxor.

 

If you need to give suggestions, I'd say "become" the poster of choice (since your CEO is supposedly not yet the poster of choice) and "that require," mainly cause it sounds a million times better. I think this is screaming out for 2 smaller sentences, though.

 

I'm glad the people I work for have no ego about this sort of thing.

[Mookz 1,288]

Wait - the CEO at your company is planning to report heavy-set? Where do you work?

[jerryskids 5,304]

it's my backup but with all plurals

 

"heavy-set sucks bags of cacks"

 

and all those S's on the ends give it a alliterative effect

 

Alliteration is good but I prefer mine because it has a better cadence when spoken aloud: da da da DUM da DUM da DUM, with the emphases on sucks, bag, and cacks.

 

Also, yours can be more easily misinterpreted to mean he sucks on the bags themselves, vs. the cacks within the bags.

[nobody 2,080]

If this is some bullsh¡t mission statement, I think the point is to make them sound as stupid as possible, so he has it right.

[IGotWorms 3,391]

Why not just shorten it to: To be a tool-bag.

[titans&bucs&bearsohmy! 2,745]

The problem with all these versions is that none of them are, in fact, sentences. You need a SUBJECT. Who is attempting (a verb, which also helps) to do this?

[Dr.Grimm 0]

Wait - the CEO at your company is planning to report heavy-set? Where do you work?

 

Evidently, most of the free world knows about this incident with heavy-set.

[Me_2006 14]

This sentence is terrible.

 

To be the poster of choice for all forums and discussion boards requiring hilarity and fun by starting the best threads and reporting heavy-set.

 

It Kills my ears but what's the acutal grammar rule(s) being destroyed here?

 

 

It's not a sentence. It's basically a giant subjunctive adverb without an actual subject, and it can't stand alone. It also lacks one of the transition words necessary to make that kind of statement, which would require you to change the verb tense (to be).

 

 

Bob (verb goes here) ; consquently he was the poster of choice for all forums [...] would work, but as it stands, it's a dependent clause without a subject. You have your verb (to be) and your object (the poster of choice) but you don't have anything doing the action.