sawilson 1 Posted January 19, 2007 After reading the thread about "how long have you been in your current relationship" and having not been single for a long period of time, I was wondering how does one determine if they are "in a relationship". I'm not saying I'm in one, was just curious. Let's say you've been out with someone a few times. At what point are you considered "in a reltionship" with this person where neither of you are seeing others without the actual words being spoken? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mungwater 588 Posted January 20, 2007 After reading the thread about "how long have you been in your current relationship" and having not been single for a long period of time, I was wondering how does one determine if they are "in a relationship". I'm not saying I'm in one, was just curious. Let's say you've been out with someone a few times. At what point are you considered "in a reltionship" with this person where neither of you are seeing others without the actual words being spoken? I think its once you get exclusive. When me and my gf started dating, I say it took 1.5 months or so. There comes a point when if you found out they went out with someone else, you'd be a little pi$$ed. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sawilson 1 Posted January 20, 2007 I think its once you get exclusive. When me and my gf started dating, I say it took 1.5 months or so. There comes a point when if you found out they went out with someone else, you'd be a little pi$$ed. Yeah, but that's my question. When/how do you know if you are exclusive where if you went out with another person, that person would be pi$$ed? I mean, how do you know this without actually voicing the words? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mungwater 588 Posted January 20, 2007 Yeah, but that's my question. When/how do you know if you are exclusive where if you went out with another person, that person would be pi$$ed? I mean, how do you know this without actually voicing the words? Oh OK, I guess it became once the dates were implied. Just assumed we'd be doing something together. Never really had a talk about it. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
GettnHuge 1 Posted January 20, 2007 After reading the thread about "how long have you been in your current relationship" and having not been single for a long period of time, I was wondering how does one determine if they are "in a relationship". I'm not saying I'm in one, was just curious. Let's say you've been out with someone a few times. At what point are you considered "in a reltionship" with this person where neither of you are seeing others without the actual words being spoken? if you start talking like this and I actually call you again, we're in a relationship hth Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lambert58 56 Posted January 20, 2007 Relationships don't have to be mutually exclusive. (I'm sorry to say). Suppose you only want to date one guy and you devote your time and energy to him but he has a wife. You are in an exclusive relationship with him but he is not in an exclusive relationship with you. For me personally I would not say I was in a relationship unless I had hopes and plans of the dating moving further along like living together or marriage. I am not sure that just dating for a few months can be classified as a relationship. And yes, I think there has to be some sort of agreement that you both are in the relationship. If it hasn't been said yet then you aren't in one. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TommyGavin 788 Posted January 20, 2007 Communication is the key Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
D_House 0 Posted January 20, 2007 if you start talking like this and I actually call you again, we're in a relationship hth pretty much. usually the girl says something after a certain amount of time. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Brown Eyed Girl 1 Posted January 20, 2007 Communication is the key I think I agree in that the 2 should discuss it together. If it gets to the point where one or the other knows that it would bother them if the other were to see other people, I think it should be brought up in a heart to heart - make sure you are both on the same page and working toward the same thing before investing anymore time. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
GettnHuge 1 Posted January 20, 2007 this seems to be a serious discussion that deserves a serious answer when you go from liking someone to like liking someone and she like likes you instead of just likes you. it's a relationship. at this point she can get your letter jacket out of storage and wear it. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
redtodd 7 Posted January 20, 2007 The 1st time one of you sh!ts on the other's chest, you are officially an item. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Chiefs04 0 Posted January 20, 2007 1. When the guy starts hugging on you and he is not trying to have sex 2. When you start leaving stuff at each others place Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SUXBNME 1,337 Posted January 20, 2007 The 1st time one of you sh!ts on the other's chest, you are officially an item. I can't believe it took that long for this Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ravens 03 0 Posted January 20, 2007 Yeah, but that's my question. When/how do you know if you are exclusive where if you went out with another person, that person would be pi$$ed? I mean, how do you know this without actually voicing the words? Ask him. Congrats on at least finding somebody you can think about this stuff with. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SUXBNME 1,337 Posted January 20, 2007 Ask him. Congrats on at least finding somebody you can think about this stuff with. she's talking about Big Pete Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Let Da Big Dog Eat 37 Posted January 20, 2007 Had this discussion with some friends a while back. The female consensus was when you first have sex (particularly if it's unprotected). The male perspective was the second time as if it wasn't good, guys will move on. My thought was when she tells you that you are. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Yer mom 2 Posted January 20, 2007 After reading the thread about "how long have you been in your current relationship" and having not been single for a long period of time, I was wondering how does one determine if they are "in a relationship". I'm not saying I'm in one, was just curious. Let's say you've been out with someone a few times. At what point are you considered "in a reltionship" with this person where neither of you are seeing others without the actual words being spoken? Good question for the single community. I would like to think that words are not needed to clarify the contract and both parties just know because of a strong mutual feeling. If strong feelings exist and then one of the parties decides to date or hook up with someone else and trys to justify it with "well we never declared things exclusive" then they're prolly a POS. Although communication as TG mentioned should definately be considered a stone etcher, I dont think words such as "Will you be my girl" or any other elementary phrase should be what makes things clear. However im just a guy sleeping around right now, so pay no mind.....do carry on Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sawilson 1 Posted January 20, 2007 I'm not just asking this one sided you know. So I've been hanging out with someone for a couple weeks now. Nice guy, we get along well and enjoy eachother's company. Although he's expressed that he likes me a lot and is looking for that "special someone" in his life and I have proven that that's possible, there has been no mention of exclusivity at all. Well, I guess except for the kind of conversation we had about not sleeping with more than one person at a time kind of thing. Anyway, so he is going out with his friends tonight and is going to crash over there and in the mean time another dude has asked if I would like to hang out and do something tonight. I'm just not sure where the line is drawn here. Yes I dig the first guys company, but who knows where it's going to lead and he's out with his friends tonight so would it be on the wrong side of things if I hung out with this other dude? And no, not that type of hanging out where sex is involved, just going out and doing something. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TommyGavin 788 Posted January 20, 2007 And no, not that type of hanging out where sex is involved, just going out and doing something. I think if you do not end up getting tagged teamed 3 black dudes with cornroll hairstyles and a big nightstick in yer mouth and one dropping a duece on your chest you should be A OK. (you did follow steamypoops thread right ?) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Yer mom 2 Posted January 20, 2007 I'm not just asking this one sided you know. So I've been hanging out with someone for a couple weeks now. Nice guy, we get along well and enjoy eachother's company. Although he's expressed that he likes me a lot and is looking for that "special someone" in his life and I have proven that that's possible, there has been no mention of exclusivity at all. Well, I guess except for the kind of conversation we had about not sleeping with more than one person at a time kind of thing. Anyway, so he is going out with his friends tonight and is going to crash over there and in the mean time another dude has asked if I would like to hang out and do something tonight. I'm just not sure where the line is drawn here. Yes I dig the first guys company, but who knows where it's going to lead and he's out with his friends tonight so would it be on the wrong side of things if I hung out with this other dude? And no, not that type of hanging out where sex is involved, just going out and doing something. Seems innocent enough, but ask yourself this. If you were to bump into each other and your with this other dude, would things get ackward for either you or him?(the guy youve been hanging out with) If the answer is yes, then your flirting with skankiness a bit. If not, carry on guilt free. But only you know the truth of the situations here, the honesty lies in yourself... Just my .02 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sawilson 1 Posted January 20, 2007 I think if you do not end up getting tagged teamed 3 black dudes with cornroll hairstyles and a big nightstick in yer mouth and one dropping a duece on your chest you should be A OK. (you did follow steamypoops thread right ?) Yeah, I did. LMAO. That was some funny shat for sure. And no chance of that here. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lambert58 56 Posted January 20, 2007 I'm not just asking this one sided you know. So I've been hanging out with someone for a couple weeks now. Nice guy, we get along well and enjoy eachother's company. Although he's expressed that he likes me a lot and is looking for that "special someone" in his life and I have proven that that's possible, there has been no mention of exclusivity at all. Well, I guess except for the kind of conversation we had about not sleeping with more than one person at a time kind of thing. Anyway, so he is going out with his friends tonight and is going to crash over there and in the mean time another dude has asked if I would like to hang out and do something tonight. I'm just not sure where the line is drawn here. Yes I dig the first guys company, but who knows where it's going to lead and he's out with his friends tonight so would it be on the wrong side of things if I hung out with this other dude? And no, not that type of hanging out where sex is involved, just going out and doing something. Call dude # 1 and explain the situation to him. Tell him you don't know where things are going with you two but you don't want to blow things by hanging out with dude # 2. Tell him that you respect his need to have friends and that you also have friends but you wanted to be upfront and honest about who you are hanging out with. Tell him that you would like him to meet dude # 2 someday so that you can all hang out. That will put his mind at ease about your dude friend. Aren't we a little old to use the word dude? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sawilson 1 Posted January 20, 2007 Seems innocent enough, but ask yourself this. If you were to bump into each other and your with this other dude, would things get ackward for either you or him?(the guy youve been hanging out with) If the answer is yes, then your flirting with skankiness a bit. If not, carry on guilt free. But only you know the truth of the situations here, the honesty lies in yourself... Just my .02 When the fock did you get so deep dude? He was the one that decided he was going to hang out with the dudes after all. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Big_Pete 0 Posted January 20, 2007 I'm gonna agree with whoever said "it's implied that we're seeing eachother tonight" type of thing. That's how I always knew that I was exclusive and "in a relationship"... when someone asks you "what are you doing tonight?" and you reply "probably going over to so and so's house" or "so and so is probably just gonna come over here"... that's when you know that you are off the market. As for me... hell, I'm drinking right now, got the pizza in the over, and about to make a few phone calls to see if I can get a booty call over here tonight. I doubt it happens, but who knows right? I really wish I could have gone down to springs tonight, cause that is guaranteed ass (just cause the chicks there tend to be much stupider *fock you people who say that isn't a word* than the ones up here) I wish I didn't delete this one chicks number from my phone... that's guaranteed pvssy up here (blonde, about 34C's)... ohh well... guess I'll watch will and grace (j/k) ohh, and Saw... I say if you go out with the 2nd guy, DON'T make out with him in any way shape or form. Remember, if you wouldn't do whatever it is you're doing infront of guy #1, then you probably shouldn't be doing it! That's free advice... anymore advice will cost you some pix. lmao! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sawilson 1 Posted January 20, 2007 Call dude # 1 and explain the situation to him. Tell him you don't know where things are going with you two but you don't want to blow things by hanging out with dude # 2. Tell him that you respect his need to have friends and that you also have friends but you wanted to be upfront and honest about who you are hanging out with. Tell him that you would like him to meet dude # 2 someday so that you can all hang out. That will put his mind at ease about your dude friend. Aren't we a little old to use the word dude? First, I don't know enough about "guy" two yet, not that close really. Friend of a friend that I've spoken with a couple times. So yeah, I guess this would be kind of a date thing which would make it wrong huh. I just didn't want to just chill at home tonight and I was originally going to go out with a girlfriend, but that fell through as she is feeling a bit sick. Guess I'm sitting at home tonight after all. Unless I go out with guy 2 but tell him I am "kinda seeing" someone else? Why does this shat have to be so focking confusing? I'm gonna agree with whoever said "it's implied that we're seeing eachother tonight" type of thing. That's how I always knew that I was exclusive and "in a relationship"... when someone asks you "what are you doing tonight?" and you reply "probably going over to so and so's house" or "so and so is probably just gonna come over here"... that's when you know that you are off the market. As for me... hell, I'm drinking right now, got the pizza in the over, and about to make a few phone calls to see if I can get a booty call over here tonight. I doubt it happens, but who knows right? I really wish I could have gone down to springs tonight, cause that is guaranteed ass (just cause the chicks there tend to be much stupider *fock you people who say that isn't a word* than the ones up here) I wish I didn't delete this one chicks number from my phone... that's guaranteed pvssy up here (blonde, about 34C's)... ohh well... guess I'll watch will and grace (j/k) ohh, and Saw... I say if you go out with the 2nd guy, DON'T make out with him in any way shape or form. Remember, if you wouldn't do whatever it is you're doing infront of guy #1, then you probably shouldn't be doing it! That's free advice... anymore advice will cost you some pix. lmao! Last statement is very true, I just didn't want to sit and chill at home (watching Will and Grace right now BTW, seriously) and no one else seems to be available. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Big_Pete 0 Posted January 20, 2007 First, I don't know enough about "guy" two yet, not that close really. Friend of a friend that I've spoken with a couple times. So yeah, I guess this would be kind of a date thing which would make it wrong huh. I just didn't want to just chill at home tonight and I was originally going to go out with a girlfriend, but that fell through as she is feeling a bit sick. Guess I'm sitting at home tonight after all. Unless I go out with guy 2 but tell him I am "kinda seeing" someone else? Why does this shat have to be so focking confusing? I'm staying at home by myself tonight (brother at work, jessica at a concert, and eric with his girlfriend)... yeah, I got a big house, so I rent out rooms. So I'm drinking alone, in the dark, watching a movie (the illusionist, I'll let you all know how it is). So , don't worry, even though you're alone, you're not "alone"... as I peer over the bush into your window Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lambert58 56 Posted January 20, 2007 First, I don't know enough about "guy" two yet, not that close really. Friend of a friend that I've spoken with a couple times. So yeah, I guess this would be kind of a date thing which would make it wrong huh. I just didn't want to just chill at home tonight and I was originally going to go out with a girlfriend, but that fell through as she is feeling a bit sick. Guess I'm sitting at home tonight after all. Unless I go out with guy 2 but tell him I am "kinda seeing" someone else? Why does this shat have to be so focking confusing? I went through the same thing when I was divorced. I was married 7 years and then divorced for 8 years before I remarried. I went out with one lady for about 3 months and thought things were progressing nicely. I had my best-friends bachelor party one evening and we all went out to a local watering hole. When we got there the girl I was dating was there with another guy. She said he was only a friend and I had no reason to not believe her but my thought was if she was really into me then she should have felt comfortable enough to tell me what was going on. If she was still wanting to date others I would have been fine with it but she should have been up front and honest about it. We talked earlier in the day and she did not mention going out with some other guy. If she would have told me and gave me an explanation one way or the other it would have made things a lot easier to deal with when we bumped into each other. If you are really into guy # 1 then call him and explain that guy # 2 called. Tell him you enjoy hanging out with him and would like to see how things progress but you are not sure where he is at. Play the night based off of his response. Good luck. As much crap as I and others around here give you, I really hope you end up happy. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TommyGavin 788 Posted January 20, 2007 I'm staying at home by myself tonight (brother at work, jessica at a concert, and eric with his girlfriend)... Whats that show on Nickolodeon ? Pete and his imaginary friends ? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Di Trying 0 Posted January 20, 2007 Ask him. Congrats on at least finding somebody you can think about this stuff with. Agreed, not to be a smarta$$ but you have an adult conversation and communicate with each other. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Yer mom 2 Posted January 20, 2007 When the fock did you get so deep dude? Yer Mom, saving Washington from skankaliciousness one female at a time Just kidding, go out with Barney #2 then, beats posting on FFToday Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hurricane Ditka 0 Posted January 20, 2007 When the fock did you get so deep dude? He was the one that decided he was going to hang out with the dudes after all. Yeah really Yer Mom. When did you start saying a bunch of stupid shiot? Shut your mouth and pay attention. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TommyGavin 788 Posted January 20, 2007 When the fock did you get so deep dude? REALLY, MAN UP will ya Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Yer mom 2 Posted January 20, 2007 Oops, sorry everyone... YEAH!! Go.....bang the other dude! Thats what I would do... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rusty Syringes 478 Posted January 20, 2007 Sorry, but I kind of moved beyond the "After School Special" perspective on relationships in junior high. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jacobsladder 0 Posted January 20, 2007 Wow meet a guy and after two weeks you are thinking this?? A bit over analytical aren't we? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TommyGavin 788 Posted January 20, 2007 YEAH!! Go.....bang the other dude! Thats what I would do... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Let Da Big Dog Eat 37 Posted January 20, 2007 Oops, sorry everyone... YEAH!! Go.....bang the other dude! Thats what I would do... Always knew you had a ghey leaning. (You had to know that was coming as soon as you posted!) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sawilson 1 Posted January 20, 2007 Wow meet a guy and after two weeks you are thinking this?? A bit over analytical aren't we? First, I am new at this whole dating scene. Second, I was asking because I was wondering if it were wrong to go out with another guy tonight after I've spent so much "time" with this other one. Not sure what the right/wrong thing to do would be. But I think ya'll mostly answered my question. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SUXBNME 1,337 Posted January 20, 2007 Always knew you had a ghey leaning. (You had to know that was coming as soon as you posted!) Mebbe Tommy and Yer Mom should meet each other ya'll You can take the country out of the girl...... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sawilson 1 Posted January 20, 2007 Mebbe Tommy and Yer Mom should meet each other You can take the country out of the girl...... But you can't take the girl out of the country! Yee Haw! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
