BunnysBastatrds

Lil Bunny has decided to change majors from crimolgy to pre law. Ughhhhh.

So one of her friends tells her to take Philosophy class. Very interesting choice for her first semester. She knows some elementary writers and theories. Me: Ever heard of Neitch? God is dead?

So a friend tells me I'm crazy for even suggesting him. Thoughts on who'd you recommend early on.

What's you got? I'm single soon and need all the help I can get. Found and old but goody.

Me: You've got small t!ts. But the lighting is bad.

So I'm working around the house yesterday trying to fix the flaws in and out of my house. I handle the exterior and b!tch ass wife is handling the interior. Bad windows and lightning on me. Interior painting on her. She's in the A/C and I'm in the yard. Sweltering southern heat I am in.

No biggy. I go to fix a window and get bit by a spider. A big ass brown one. On my marriage ring finger.

  Me: Fawking Irony, This is crazy. I can't take it off. My ring is stuck.
Her: I hope you lose that digit. Fawk you!.

I'm in the mood to cut it off. Didgets are easy. Especially that one. I'll never have to have another on that finger. Fawking b!tch.

I'm in the process of divorce. Me and Mrs. Bunny are going our separate ways. Little Bunny is accepted in LSU for this semester. Menapause and an empty nest have put wifey over the top. She wants to go. And I'm fine with that. Sell the house and split it down the middle. We have some nice art work and antiques. She can have all the art.  I'm ready to go our own ways.  Amicably. And she says.....

Mrs. Bunny: You ate that Dallas cop out in the pool when we were all in bed after that awesome Fourth of July party under the premise that you could teach that lesbian wannabe how to please her girlfriend. I just heard the story last month. You are an ass.

I ate her out and shared every tip I could. She was a very confused lesbian that needed guidance in a pool with a guy like me. We spent three hours playing. Got on line with our phones. Showed her my favorite adult star, Alexis Texas.

Oh, 36C. She is hot. And clumsy. But bad ass. If she arrested you, you'd have respect. I taught her how to lick some poosay. One great night.

Fast forward. She told my wife's best friend who's pool we were in what I did. Yesterday. When confronted, I man up.

Me: I got to teach a beautiful woman with a gun how to eat nurse poosay in a pool and she thanked me like I was a God. Busted? You bet.

I tried.