what kind of quality time do you spend with your s.o.?

[peenie 1,961]

i was just wondering, how much time do you spend doing things with your s.o.? do you guys go to the movies, watch videos, go out to restaurants, shop or read together? how often do you talk to each other on the phone? i mean if you're married do you call each other during the day?

[Ms. Shared-Syringes 0]

CRAP!

 

You're supposed to spend quality time with them, too?

 

I thought getting married was enough.

[Recliner Pilot 61]

CRAP!

 

You're supposed to spend quality time with them, too?

 

I thought getting married was enough.

 

In your case, it's more than enough.

[Monochrome 0]

I water her shallow grave every day.

[jerryskids 7,083]

I write romantic poetry daily. Tend a rose garden and lay the petals on her pillow. Breakfast in bed. Foot massages, back rubs, you name it.

 

Just don't tell my wife I do it for her.

[peenie 1,961]

could someone be serious please.

[jerryskids 7,083]

i was just wondering, how much time do you spend doing things with your s.o.? do you guys go to the movies, watch videos, go out to restaurants, shop or read together? how often do you talk to each other on the phone? i mean if you're married do you call each other during the day?

Serious? No we don't go to movies or watch videos often, as we don't consider "quality" time sitting there staring at a screen. We went to a bar last night to see a friend's band. Last week we went shopping for some new dress shoes for me. I work from home when I'm not traveling so we talk throughout the day.

 

Also she swallows.

 

What do I win?

[MDC 7,881]

Her lips spend a lot of quality time wrapped around my cack.

[bob_probert_2000 1]

Her lips spend a lot of quality time wrapped around my cack.

I bet. MDC's gal

[peenie 1,961]

Serious? No we don't go to movies or watch videos often, as we don't consider "quality" time sitting there staring at a screen. We went to a bar last night to see a friend's band. Last week we went shopping for some new dress shoes for me. I work from home when I'm not traveling so we talk throughout the day.

 

Also she swallows.

 

What do I win?

 

a new car!!

[supermike80 2,082]

a new car!!

 

Not enough to be honest. We will do dinner, and we both like to go to the movies but we also like our alone time. We dont share a whole lot of common fun interests.

 

I actually wish we'd do more, but it is what it is.

[Chiefs04 0]

Does banging her count...

 

 

We have kids so most of out QT is spent with them but we try to have a night out 2 times a month and take a long weekend type of thing twice a year

[peenie 1,961]

Not enough to be honest. We will do dinner, and we both like to go to the movies but we also like our alone time. We dont share a whole lot of common fun interests.

 

I actually wish we'd do more, but it is what it is.

thank you for your honesty here is your parting gift: unwrap

 

Does banging her count...

We have kids so most of out QT is spent with them but we try to have a night out 2 times a month and take a long weekend type of thing twice a year

no, it doesn't count. lucky for you, you make a point to do some other stuff. here is your gift.

[sawilson 1]

I don't have an SO, but if I did it would be long walks on the beach, reading to eachother at night, watching romantic movies.

 

Who am I trying to kid. Shiot, give me someone to watch a good football game with, someone to come home to at the end of the day and rest my head on, someone to curl up to under the blankies at night and occationally whisper sweet nothings to, and I'd be happy. That is good quality time there.

 

Oh, except I have now taken up fishing and crabbing at this place that is on the waterfront by my house. A nice day on the water with your pole in and the net down and that would be great quality time!

[TommyGavin 790]

Quality?

 

zero

[dolfan06 1]

I'm spending quality time with my SO at this very moment, reading this thread. I really wish that some of you would watch your language.

 

Also, she says hi.

[jerryskids 7,083]

A nice day on the water with your pole in

[sawilson 1]

Seriously though. The other night I was laying down thinking how nice it would be to have someone to curl up with. Not just anyone, but someone special. Just lay in bed and curl up with and watch TV or something.....

 

Kinda sad huh.

[jerryskids 7,083]

Seriously though. The other night I was laying down thinking how nice it would be to have someone to curl up with. Not just anyone, but someone special. Just lay in bed and curl up with and watch TV or something.....

 

Kinda sad huh.

Yeah, kinda. But that isn't the point in life you are at now. If it happens for you now, bonus, but don't worry if it doesn't.

[TheNewGirl 1,636]

We have a four year old and a 7 month old. Alone time? WTF is that?

 

After the kids go to bed, we try and spend some time together. Most of the time, though, we are so dead tired that time alone might be spent watching one of our favorite shows on TV. If we happen to go to bed at the same time, we often just lie in bed and talk to each other, snuggle, etc.

 

Date night was once a week before bebe arrived. She's not ready to stay overnight at grandma's though, so the weekly date night has fallen by the way side for a short while. We are okay with that, though.

[sawilson 1]

Yeah, kinda. But that isn't the point in life you are at now. If it happens for you now, bonus, but don't worry if it doesn't.

Yeah, but sometimes it would be really nice to have someone to curl up to and snuggle with at the end of the day, yah know.

[Guest Black Label Society]

Yeah, but sometimes it would be really nice to have someone to curl up to and snuggle with at the end of the day, yah know.

 

Good god saw...I wish you lived around here...

 

 

I'm a pretty simple guy......you seem like a pretty simple gal.

 

I don't want much out of my mate....just respect for what I do, and not to abuse my showering of love.

It seems like every girl I date just takes it all for granted...and I HATE that.

 

 

Look, if I write you a poem, or do something special for you, just PLEASE don't EXPECT it.

Realize it's my way of saying "I'm into you" and that as long as you show some form of appreciation, you'll continue to get it forever.

 

Abuse it, and expect it, without giving me SOMETHING back,...and I'll lose interest.

 

ARRRRR!!!!

 

 

(sorry...I've just been burned so much.....I just don't understand)

[TheNewGirl 1,636]

Abuse it, and expect it, without giving me SOMETHING back,...and I'll lose interest.

 

I think that a lot of people are like this, maybe esp. men when they are dating. I think that there are A LOT of women out there that get treated one way and expect it all time, esp when it's great stuff.

I think that's why I don't ever give my husband crap about not buying me tons of flowers, gifts, or writing me poems. He never did it all the time when we were dating, you know? Flowers occassionally is much better for me than getting them all the time...because it's usually unexpected.

[sawilson 1]

 

Good god saw...I wish you lived around here...

I'm a pretty simple guy......you seem like a pretty simple gal.

 

I don't want much out of my mate....just respect for what I do, and not to abuse my showering of love.

It seems like every girl I date just takes it all for granted...and I HATE that.

Look, if I write you a poem, or do something special for you, just PLEASE don't EXPECT it.

Realize it's my way of saying "I'm into you" and that as long as you show some form of appreciation, you'll continue to get it forever.

 

Abuse it, and expect it, without giving me SOMETHING back,...and I'll lose interest.

 

ARRRRR!!!!

(sorry...I've just been burned so much.....I just don't understand)

I know exactly what you're saying and I totally agree. I'm a total give and take kinda gal. I like to surprise my so's when I can with something nice, whether it be a nice dinner out, a surprise at home, or just something he isn't expecting. But like you said, don't always expect it - that kind of ruins the whole point!!!

 

I dont' want much either. Just someone to come home to at the end of the day who I can curl up next to and spend some time with. BSing about the day or playing under the covers with. Someone who wont' smother me when I need my alone time knowing that I will do the same, give alone time that is. Someone who just wants me because of me.

 

The big thing right now that I am finding in guys is they smother WAY too much and WAY too early. I dont' want that. Not someone who wants to be with me 24/7, but someone I can come home to and curl up next to.

 

 

I think that a lot of people are like this, maybe esp. men when they are dating. I think that there are A LOT of women out there that get treated one way and expect it all time, esp when it's great stuff.

I think that's why I don't ever give my husband crap about not buying me tons of flowers, gifts, or writing me poems. He never did it all the time when we were dating, you know? Flowers occassionally is much better for me than getting them all the time...because it's usually unexpected.

ITA TNG. If you get something all the time, then it kind of loses its appeal. Doesn't serve the same purpose.

[Guest Black Label Society]

I think that a lot of people are like this, maybe esp. men when they are dating. I think that there are A LOT of women out there that get treated one way and expect it all time, esp when it's great stuff.

I think that's why I don't ever give my husband crap about not buying me tons of flowers, gifts, or writing me poems. He never did it all the time when we were dating, you know? Flowers occassionally is much better for me than getting them all the time...because it's usually unexpected.

 

 

I'm not sure I fully understand. Forgive me.

 

If you're taking a 'shot' at me.....(which I don't think you are FWIW)...

My gig is that I have ALOT of love to give, and am BEYOND romantic.

But the last 2 girls I dated, I wrote them poems that took me WEEKS to write, made them CD's with songs that reminded me of us, left POST-ITS all over the house for the morning, for NO reason. Just to send her on her way for a normal mundaine day with a huge smile.

 

In return.....I get, you never do anything for me anymore. You don't write me poems anymore, I never get flowers. In return, I desperately want to tell them "that's because the last poem I wrote you ended up in your glove box and you left it there for 3 months." I notice that stuff ya know?

[sawilson 1]

I'm not sure I fully understand. Forgive me.

 

If you're taking a 'shot' at me.....(which I don't think you are FWIW)...

My gig is that I have ALOT of love to give, and am BEYOND romantic.

But the last 2 girls I dated, I wrote them poems that took me WEEKS to write, made them CD's with songs that reminded me of us, left POST-ITS all over the house for the morning, for NO reason. Just to send her on her way for a normal mundaine day with a huge smile.

 

In return.....I get, you never do anything for me anymore. You don't write me poems anymore, I never get flowers. In return, I desperately want to tell them "that's because the last poem I wrote you ended up in your glove box and you left it there for 3 months." I notice that stuff ya know?

You've definitely been dating the wrong girls BLS. I feel sorry for that. Trust me, there are plenty o women out there who would MORE than appreciate the things you do and return the appreciation 10 fold. Trust me on this one!

[TheNewGirl 1,636]

I'm not sure I fully understand. Forgive me.

 

If you're taking a 'shot' at me.....(which I don't think you are FWIW)...

My gig is that I have ALOT of love to give, and am BEYOND romantic.

But the last 2 girls I dated, I wrote them poems that took me WEEKS to write, made them CD's with songs that reminded me of us, left POST-ITS all over the house for the morning, for NO reason. Just to send her on her way for a normal mundaine day with a huge smile.

 

In return.....I get, you never do anything for me anymore. You don't write me poems anymore, I never get flowers. In return, I desperately want to tell them "that's because the last poem I wrote you ended up in your glove box and you left it there for 3 months." I notice that stuff ya know?

 

 

Not taking a shot at you at all, BLS. I think that it's great tht you're like this. Problem is that if you do things like that SOME women WILL expect it all the time, hence you get the "you never do anything for me anymore" crap. You want someone who's more appreciative of the things that take YOU time and thought and all of that. My advice would be to not let a chick see that side of you right away, and that way you can learn that she would be more appreciative, and your thoughtfulness and all of that wouldn't go unnoticed or unreciprocated. If you do have a lot of love to give and you're beyond romantic, some women might need to "warm up" to that, if you know what I mean. They will get those poems, think it's cool, and that you're "into them" without fully recognizing that it's much more than that...hope that makes sense. Again, not taking a shot at you at all, I think it's great that you put so much thought and effort into things like that.

[Guest Black Label Society]

I know exactly what you're saying and I totally agree. I'm a total give and take kinda gal. I like to surprise my so's when I can with something nice, whether it be a nice dinner out, a surprise at home, or just something he isn't expecting. But like you said, don't always expect it - that kind of ruins the whole point!!!

 

I dont' want much either. Just someone to come home to at the end of the day who I can curl up next to and spend some time with. BSing about the day or playing under the covers with. Someone who wont' smother me when I need my alone time knowing that I will do the same, give alone time that is. Someone who just wants me because of me.

 

The big thing right now that I am finding in guys is they smother WAY too much and WAY too early. I dont' want that. Not someone who wants to be with me 24/7, but someone I can come home to and curl up next to.

 

ITA TNG. If you get something all the time, then it kind of loses its appeal. Doesn't serve the same purpose.

 

See, I'm the same way. I NEED my OWN time....

I don;t want to be smothered, of feel like if I want to play cards with my best buddies once every 3 months, then I shouldn;t be made to feel like I don't love or care about you. I need my own interests too.

 

I realize that MOST women don;t do football, or fantasy. Therefore, I do not expect you to like to watch it, participate, etc. IE, you're probably not going to get me to do a wine tasting with you and your girlfriends.

I'm just a bit too simple for that....but if you REALLY wanted me to go, I;d do it. I;ve learned to say "never say never".

[sawilson 1]

See, I'm the same way. I NEED my OWN time....

I don;t want to be smothered, of feel like if I want to play cards with my best buddies once every 3 months, then I shouldn;t be made to feel like I don't love or care about you. I need my own interests too.

 

I realize that MOST women don;t do football, or fantasy. Therefore, I do not expect you to like to watch it, participate, etc. IE, you're probably not going to get me to do a wine tasting with you and your girlfriends.

I'm just a bit too simple for that....but if you REALLY wanted me to go, I;d do it. I;ve learned to say "never say never".

Sounds like you and I are a lot alike actually.

 

But for me the guy HAS to be into football and into fantasy as well, that wouldn't hurt. I don't want to be the only one in full gear on Sunday screaming at the TV. It would just be too odd.

 

And I think every couple NEEDS alone time. Just because you become a couple doesn't mean you become one person. I've said it before and I'll say it again, the only person anyone should spend 24/7 with is themselves, and half the time I can hardly stand to do that, why in the hell would i want to do it with someone else, or expect someone else to do it with me?

 

I think if a guy gives up his regular life like playing poker with the boys (unless of course they let me join ) or other activities like that, then there is really something wrong with him.

[Guest Black Label Society]

Not taking a shot at you at all, BLS. I think that it's great tht you're like this. Problem is that if you do things like that SOME women WILL expect it all the time, hence you get the "you never do anything for me anymore" crap. You want someone who's more appreciative of the things that take YOU time and thought and all of that. My advice would be to not let a chick see that side of you right away, and that way you can learn that she would be more appreciative, and your thoughtfulness and all of that wouldn't go unnoticed or unreciprocated. If you do have a lot of love to give and you're beyond romantic, some women might need to "warm up" to that, if you know what I mean. They will get those poems, think it's cool, and that you're "into them" without fully recognizing that it's much more than that...hope that makes sense. Again, not taking a shot at you at all, I think it's great that you put so much thought and effort into things like that.

 

 

Get your point. and I appreciate your candor. Makes sense.

 

In my last relationship, I went all out, because honestly after the first 2 weeks of dating, I was SURE she was the "one".

 

She killed me emotionally. I'm sure that I;m still not over that feeling.

I gave her EVERYTHING.....and yet held back when it was necessary. I did not bow down to her every whim, but I went WAY out of my way to please her, and in the end I ended up with a house I didn't want, in a town I didn;t really want to move to, with a mortgage I struggle to afford because she;s gone now.

 

God, she killed me.

[sawilson 1]

Get your point. and I appreciate your candor. Makes sense.

 

In my last relationship, I went all out, because honestly after the first 2 weeks of dating, I was SURE she was the "one".

 

She killed me emotionally. I'm sure that I;m still not over that feeling.

I gave her EVERYTHING.....and yet held back when it was necessary. I did not bow down to her every whim, but I went WAY out of my way to please her, and in the end I ended up with a house I didn't want, in a town I didn;t really want to move to, with a mortgage I struggle to afford because she;s gone now.

 

God, she killed me.

Wow - that's so sad.

[Guest Black Label Society]

Sounds like you and I are a lot alike actually.

 

But for me the guy HAS to be into football and into fantasy as well, that wouldn't hurt. I don't want to be the only one in full gear on Sunday screaming at the TV. It would just be too odd.

 

And I think every couple NEEDS alone time. Just because you become a couple doesn't mean you become one person. I've said it before and I'll say it again, the only person anyone should spend 24/7 with is themselves, and half the time I can hardly stand to do that, why in the hell would i want to do it with someone else, or expect someone else to do it with me?

 

I think if a guy gives up his regular life like playing poker with the boys (unless of course they let me join ) or other activities like that, then there is really something wrong with him.

 

OK. so by now, you;re thinking teh SAME thing I'm thinking. WHY are you still single?

You;re obviously laid back, very cool, and fun.

 

My thing is this: if a girl likes, understands, and plays fantasy football, she's definately on the same page as me.

 

So, what's your gig?

 

For me, I'll be honest. I'll give someone I care about anything....but over time, I think they get "numb" to it, and it;s just a typical thing. And to me, it;s like....'do you realize that I've spent 4-5hrs a night for the last 2 weeks to write you that?"

 

Don't get me wrong, I;ve got my issuse...who doesn't?

 

 

For craps sake, I;m such a good guy, I have dinner with my grandmother EVERY monday evening since my grandpa died. I KNOW it's the highlight of her week, and it's my way of telling her once a week that now that she's in a retirement home (not nursing), that I think about her, and I love her, and it;s NOTHING for me to give 1 evening a week to let her know that.

 

Every girl I've dated in the last 5 years, HAD to pass the 'Gramma test'. IE, if she didn't like em it was BAD for her. My gramma is probably the 2nd nicest person on teh planet next to Mother Theresa.

 

I realize everybody thinks that about their gma.....but I may be the only one lucky enough to really have that. She's 87, never driven in her life, cooks like NOBODY'S business, and NEVER EVER EVER has said a bad word about anyone (except George Bush...he's not her favorite).

 

anyway....I'm off tangent considerably...sorry.

[sawilson 1]

OK. so by now, you;re thinking teh SAME thing I'm thinking. WHY are you still single?

You;re obviously laid back, very cool, and fun.

 

My thing is this: if a girl likes, understands, and plays fantasy football, she's definately on the same page as me.

 

So, what's your gig?

 

For me, I'll be honest. I'll give someone I care about anything....but over time, I think they get "numb" to it, and it;s just a typical thing. And to me, it;s like....'do you realize that I've spent 4-5hrs a night for the last 2 weeks to write you that?"

 

Don't get me wrong, I;ve got my issuse...who doesn't?

For craps sake, I;m such a good guy, I have dinner with my grandmother EVERY monday evening since my grandpa died. I KNOW it's the highlight of her week, and it's my way of telling her once a week that now that she's in a retirement home (not nursing), that I think about her, and I love her, and it;s NOTHING for me to give 1 evening a week to let her know that.

 

Every girl I've dated in the last 5 years, HAD to pass the 'Gramma test'. IE, if she didn't like em it was BAD for her. My gramma is probably the 2nd nicest person on teh planet next to Mother Theresa.

 

I realize everybody thinks that about their gma.....but I may be the only one lucky enough to really have that. She's 87, never driven in her life, cooks like NOBODY'S business, and NEVER EVER EVER has said a bad word about anyone (except George Bush...he's not her favorite).

 

anyway....I'm off tangent considerably...sorry.

 

Still doesn't explain why you're single then. Care to try again? You sound like a really great guy so I don't get it.

 

Me, I'm single cuz I'm finalizing a divorce and was with the guy for 10 years. What happened with us is we just fell out of love with eachother and are better off as friends. We talk ALL the time, he's a great father, we dont' argue, fight or anything like that, we just weren't meant for eachother.

He is going to make someone a wonderful husband someday, it just wasnt' me and I'm OK with that.

 

As for dating, I have since my ex, but like I said, they all are very clingy and call ALL the time, and want to spend 24/7 with me. If they are like that after a couple of dates, it's not for me. I dont' mind saying good night on the phone or something like that, but one guy after one movie went out and bought me presents, another called off a game he was going to go to with his son so he could go to the movies with me (found out afterwards) another already told me he loved me..... etc.

 

Cant' a guy just want to get to know you a bit but not make you his entire life after a couple of dates???? Or maybe it wouldn't have been so bad had I had a real connection with any of them. I don't know the answer to that, but once one comes around that I have that attraction with, I will know it.

 

ETA - I have plenty o problems too - trust me. No one is perfect at all, which is why it takes the right person finding another right person to make it work.

[ROBOKOP 0]

Still doesn't explain why you're single then. Care to try again? You sound like a really great guy so I don't get it.

 

Me, I'm single cuz I'm finalizing a divorce and was with the guy for 10 years. What happened with us is we just fell out of love with eachother and are better off as friends. We talk ALL the time, he's a great father, we dont' argue, fight or anything like that, we just weren't meant for eachother.

He is going to make someone a wonderful husband someday, it just wasnt' me and I'm OK with that.

 

As for dating, I have since my ex, but like I said, they all are very clingy and call ALL the time, and want to spend 24/7 with me. If they are like that after a couple of dates, it's not for me. I dont' mind saying good night on the phone or something like that, but one guy after one movie went out and bought me presents, another called off a game he was going to go to with his son so he could go to the movies with me (found out afterwards) another already told me he loved me..... etc.

 

Cant' a guy just want to get to know you a bit but not make you his entire life after a couple of dates???? Or maybe it wouldn't have been so bad had I had a real connection with any of them. I don't know the answer to that, but once one comes around that I have that attraction with, I will know it.

 

ETA - I have plenty o problems too - trust me. No one is perfect at all, which is why it takes the right person finding another right person to make it work.

 

Two small points:

 

1. Hate to be blunt, but youre telling me it had nothing to do with the alcoholism?

2. Mr. Right will not be found in a fantasy football forum.

 

As for me, quality time with the significant other has evolved into quality time with the family. We do occassionally try to make time for just us, but it is rare.

[Strike 6,017]

OMG, I read this thread, and then I threw up in my mouf. But I swallowed it again so it's all cool.

[Mephisto 15]

2. Mr. Right will not be found in a fantasy football forum.

 

Excuse me?

[Guest Black Label Society]

OMG, I read this thread, and then I threw up in my mouf. But I swallowed it again so it's all cool.

 

You're solidifying my opinion.

[TheNewGirl 1,636]

Still doesn't explain why you're single then. Care to try again? You sound like a really great guy so I don't get it.

 

Me, I'm single cuz I'm finalizing a divorce and was with the guy for 10 years. What happened with us is we just fell out of love with eachother and are better off as friends. We talk ALL the time, he's a great father, we dont' argue, fight or anything like that, we just weren't meant for eachother.

He is going to make someone a wonderful husband someday, it just wasnt' me and I'm OK with that.

 

As for dating, I have since my ex, but like I said, they all are very clingy and call ALL the time, and want to spend 24/7 with me. If they are like that after a couple of dates, it's not for me. I dont' mind saying good night on the phone or something like that, but one guy after one movie went out and bought me presents, another called off a game he was going to go to with his son so he could go to the movies with me (found out afterwards) another already told me he loved me..... etc.

 

Cant' a guy just want to get to know you a bit but not make you his entire life after a couple of dates???? Or maybe it wouldn't have been so bad had I had a real connection with any of them. I don't know the answer to that, but once one comes around that I have that attraction with, I will know it.

 

ETA - I have plenty o problems too - trust me. No one is perfect at all, which is why it takes the right person finding another right person to make it work.

 

After 10 years and a child, how do you just "fall out of love" with someone? I don't understand that.

 

I am also curious about the alcoholism...if I recall you've been sober for less than a year right? Don't many 12-Step programs ask that you not get involved with other people for at least 12 months as to avoid the co-dependency? I can see how this would make it feel as if everyone wanted you to "make them your life" after a couple of dates, or that they are smothering you.

 

If I were you, I'd forego the dating all together right now until 1) my divorce is final and 2) I am feeling better about my addiction, etc.

 

Of course, it's none of my business, but going from an addiction and a marriage to wanting to "find someone" seems like you have more stuff going on in your life, and perhaps being by yourself and relearning about YOU outisde of marriage and alcohol is something I would focus on.

 

Not trying to be a ###### or anything, but just an observation, I guess.

 

BLS - She knew that you were the "one" after 2 weeks? And you up and left your life for her? Did you think that she was the "one" as well? Just curious.

[Rusty Syringes 478]

There's only so much quality time to be had when you're married to the kind of woman I'm married to.

[sawilson 1]

After 10 years and a child, how do you just "fall out of love" with someone? I don't understand that.

 

I am also curious about the alcoholism...if I recall you've been sober for less than a year right? Don't many 12-Step programs ask that you not get involved with other people for at least 12 months as to avoid the co-dependency? I can see how this would make it feel as if everyone wanted you to "make them your life" after a couple of dates, or that they are smothering you.

 

If I were you, I'd forego the dating all together right now until 1) my divorce is final and 2) I am feeling better about my addiction, etc.

 

Of course, it's none of my business, but going from an addiction and a marriage to wanting to "find someone" seems like you have more stuff going on in your life, and perhaps being by yourself and relearning about YOU outisde of marriage and alcohol is something I would focus on.

 

Not trying to be a ###### or anything, but just an observation, I guess.

 

BLS - She knew that you were the "one" after 2 weeks? And you up and left your life for her? Did you think that she was the "one" as well? Just curious.

I understand your questions and why you asked them.

 

First, maybe you dont' understand how it could happen because it hasn't to you yet. Be thank ful for that. But it does happen, and I am thankful that is the only reason we are getting divorced and not because we hate eachother.

 

And to answer yours and the ones above question about the alcohol, of course my drinking didn't help bring us together, in any sense of the imagination. But I guess that I thought that after I stopped, it would bring us closer and things would be good again, but that's where I was wrong. It didn't help resolve anything in my marriage, only brought forward what "actual" problems we had minus the alcohol. We wanted different things out of life, wanted to go in different directions and spend our time doing different things. And it wasn't an all of a sudden surprise sort of thing at all, for the last almost 2 years we lived almost as roommates and that is about it.

 

TNG - I have been sober for almost 2 years now and regardless of what has happened in those 2 years (and there has been a lot) - they have been the happiest I can remember except for the birth of my son. And I don't think I am looking for Mr Right at this time, which is probably why I feel smothered by the ones who want to spend all of their time with me. I like being alone again and don't want to jump right into something at all. But it doesnt' stop me from thinking it would be really nice to have someone laying next to me at the end of the day that I can curl up to, that is human nature. Especially for someone who hasn't had it in a long time.

 

And I dont' think you were trying to be a biotch at all - all great questions and observations, thanks.