An Oral Sex Thread

[Me_2006 14]

So it's warm today (for February in Kentucky) and a group of people I go to college with were sitting outside talking when one dude in the group starts joking around with another about a 'meh' girl who walked by. Apparently she blows him regularly, and he's cool with it because she doesn't appear to want any kind of relationship or anything.

 

Everyone in the group (at least from what I could tell) seemed to think that was a pretty solid setup, despite the fact that she wasn't anything spectacular and not exactly the type you'd take out on a date. My next class was boring so I lost focus and started thinking about it, and I've done the same thing when the situation has presented itself. Nothing too hideous, although I'll admit I'd stoop a bit lower than I have. Either way, the question came to mind:

 

Is this only a guy thing? Is there something about no-strings attached, no reciprocation required BJ that appeals to guys while the inverse doesn't interest girls? For the few 'female' geeks here, what's the deal with that? Is it an intimacy thing? Why could an average looking dude not call up a hot girl and offer it up with no expectation of anything beyond doing her? Or could he and we're just all being tricked?

 

I've never given it a shot and I'm not sure why I would, I just found the difference interesting and wondered what the female perspective on it might be. Is there any dude here (assuming you're single or whatever) that wouldnt or hasnt taken a moped girl up on the offer? If you did or would turn it down, why?

[Drizzay 646]

Oh boy, this thread should be full of fairy tales and exaggeration....

[Little Rusty 17]

a well placed P would have made a world of difference here,....you put a picture of a moped in my mind ( zoom zoom )

 

 

 

* on a side note,....i love pie, but not a fan of clams ( see nikki )

[nikki2200 4]

I think women have more of a propensity to do that when they get older, as opposed to a young college girl. Younger women are most likely looking for love and unicorns and rainbows and happily ever afters. As you get older, and become somewhat more disillusioned with the happily ever after stuff, some women (although I'm sure it's the minority) just want to get their satisfaction without the drama of a relationship. Also, as you get older sex becomes less of a big deal than when you were young. Watch Sex and the City.

 

That being said... women tend to tie emotions to sex more than men do, so just having a fock buddy that you really aren't interested in emotionally can be difficult for a lot of women. Couple that with the fact that finding a guy who is so awesome in bed that you can overlook the fact that you don't give a fock about him can be errr difficult.

 

Also, for women, I think really good sex always has a level of intimacy and emotion that go along with thinking it's that amazing.

 

That being said, at times, I have had a fock buddy just because I wasn't interested in being in a relationship, but wanted to have sex. But this was when I was in my late 20s and my career was the most important thing to me at the time.

[nikki2200 4]

a well placed P would have made a world of difference here,....you put a picture of a moped in my mind ( zoom zoom )

 

 

 

* on a side note,....i love pie, but not a fan of clams ( see nikki )

 

[Me_2006 14]

a well placed P would have made a world of difference here,....you put a picture of a moped in my mind ( zoom zoom )

 

 

 

* on a side note,....i love pie, but not a fan of clams ( see nikki )

I don't understand the well placed P thing.

[TheNewGirl 1,031]

I think women have more of a propensity to do that when they get older, as opposed to a young college girl. Younger women are most likely looking for love and unicorns and rainbows and happily ever afters. As you get older, and become somewhat more disillusioned with the happily ever after stuff, some women (although I'm sure it's the minority) just want to get their satisfaction without the drama of a relationship. Also, as you get older sex becomes less of a big deal than when you were young. Watch Sex and the City.

That being said... women tend to tie emotions to sex more than men do, so just having a fock buddy that you really aren't interested in emotionally can be difficult for a lot of women. Couple that with the fact that finding a guy who is so awesome in bed that you can overlook the fact that you don't give a fock about him can be errr difficult.

 

Also, for women, I think really good sex always has a level of intimacy and emotion that go along with thinking it's that amazing.

 

That being said, at times, I have had a fock buddy just because I wasn't interested in being in a relationship, but wanted to have sex. But this was when I was in my late 20s and my career was the most important thing to me at the time.

 

To the bolded, I think the importance and intimacy of sex means less as you get older, though I am not sure if that's what you meant by that comment.

 

At any rate, I think oral for guys is just different than it is for girls. It was something that never really crossed my mind when I was younger, so I never really did it much. And I don't remember being on the receiving end of a lot of oral either. It was all about just having sex. I dunno.

 

I think if I were in my late teens now, that oral would be something I would do more often, just because of the fact that there is this thought that it makes you less of a slut. Blow a lot of guys, meh...but actually FOCK them? SLUT. At least that's what I gather from conversations and things I hear these days. The 'technical' virgin garbage, etc. Even if you blow 100 guys a week, I guess there is some bragadocio that you can claim to be a virgin since they've never stuck it in your vajayjay.

 

I would never just hook up with someone so I could get oral, like a guy would hook up with a chick just to get oral. I would hook up for sex, though. I never really had a fock-buddy when I was younger either, though. But now, I can see how I'd have one. I have kids, and if I were to get divorced, I would almost prefer a fock buddy than getting all wrapped up in the drama that a relationship can cause sometimes - at least in the beginning. I can see wanting or needing something more intimate and long term in the long run, though.

[IGotWorms 3,315]

[titans&bucs&bearsohmy! 2,745]

I've thought the same thing me.

 

You see a smoking hottie somewhere... what would happen if I walked up and said "Hi, here's my phone number. I know you are way way way out of my league, but if you are ever bored/horny, just call the number and say 'now' and I'll come over, lick you raw, never say a word, and leave quietly."

 

I've never felt like being slapped enough to try it though. Try it and report back.

[Me_2006 14]

I've thought the same thing me.

 

You see a smoking hottie somewhere... what would happen if I walked up and said "Hi, here's my phone number. I know you are way way way out of my league, but if you are ever bored/horny, just call the number and say 'now' and I'll come over, lick you raw, never say a word, and leave quietly."

 

I've never felt like being slapped enough to try it though. Try it and report back.

 

This is the blunt, aggressive version of what I was saying. Is this not something women do/think? Is it because attractive women can have anyone do whatever they want regardless?

[IGotWorms 3,315]

What is the chick's motivation in just blowing some dude on a regular basis?

 

Is it something to do with lack of self-worth? Or does she just love giving bjs for some reason?

 

If its the latter can you have her call me? Actually, either way, have her call me

[jerryskids 5,206]

I've thought the same thing me.

 

You see a smoking hottie somewhere... what would happen if I walked up and said "Hi, here's my phone number. I know you are way way way out of my league, but if you are ever bored/horny, just call the number and say 'now' and I'll come over, lick you raw, never say a word, and leave quietly."

 

I've never felt like being slapped enough to try it though. Try it and report back.

 

wait... that might work.

 

Anyway, it all comes down to: men are genetically programmed to hook up with as many chicks as possible to make as many cavebabies as possible. Women are programmed to try to keep them around. So in general, men will be into that sort of thing, women not so much.

[titans&bucs&bearsohmy! 2,745]

This is the blunt, aggressive version of what I was saying. Is this not something women do/think? Is it because attractive women can have anyone do whatever they want regardless?

 

I actually think the reason it wouldn't work is simple...

 

Chicks despise nice/weak/desperate whatever you want to call it. That's why you see chicks constantly being used as doormats by focking tools... that's what, young women anyway, respond to.

 

I didn't want to believe it for years... but its true.

 

I had a friend who is a total player. He decided to do an experament. He wanted to see if treating them bad actually worked. He called them every filthy name he could, told them about focking their sister (he had) while he was focking them, all sorts of sh!t. They loved it, kept coming back for more.

 

Its sad really, but thats the way it is.

[IGotWorms 3,315]

So true titans. Unfortunately I didn't learn that until AFTER college!

[titans&bucs&bearsohmy! 2,745]

So true titans. Unfortunately I didn't learn that until AFTER college!

 

Me neither. If I ever have a son, the day before he leaves for college, we'll have a talk.

 

"Son... you now how I told you to treat women with respect, and that's how you find a good one? Well, that's true, eventually. When you are in your late 20's early 30's looking to get married, remember that.

 

In the meantime... keep the pimp hand strong. Chicks dig ######."

[Little Rusty 17]

I don't understand the well placed P thing.

 

 

don't worry,...me neither

 

* i read it wrong = nevermind

 

 

But i stand firm on the clams deal

[Me_2006 14]

What is the chick's motivation in just blowing some dude on a regular basis?

 

Is it something to do with lack of self-worth? Or does she just love giving bjs for some reason?

 

If its the latter can you have her call me? Actually, either way, have her call me

I guess she thinks he's cute or whatever it is she's looking for. I've had two similar 'friendships' and never really questioned the motives either. They randomly approached me (facebook, had classes with them), it was hush-hush, and it broke off when I started seeing someone officially, then picked back up during dry spells.

 

They weren't gorgeous. Just kind of your average 18-19 year old college girl. Not 300lbs or manly or anything, just nothing you'd actively pursue. I saw no reason to turn it down though.

 

That's why I wondered how it worked in reverse. Why just an average dude couldnt go up to a girl and offer. I figured there was a lot more at play in the female rationale behind it, so I came to this place because you guys wont call the police.

[naomi 343]

I actually think the reason it wouldn't work is simple...

 

Chicks despise nice/weak/desperate whatever you want to call it. That's why you see chicks constantly being used as doormats by focking tools... that's what, young women anyway, respond to.

 

I didn't want to believe it for years... but its true.

 

I had a friend who is a total player. He decided to do an experament. He wanted to see if treating them bad actually worked. He called them every filthy name he could, told them about focking their sister (he had) while he was focking them, all sorts of sh!t. They loved it, kept coming back for more.

 

Its sad really, but thats the way it is.

 

A real player has intuition about what girls will respond to that though (not to mention they're more likely to be attracted to that type of guy). If he was given a random pool to try this out with, I don't think his findings would have been the same.

[OldMaid 1,838]

When I'm in the mood for no hassle oral I just use a vibrator. It NEVER asks me to make it a sandwich. HTH

[Me_2006 14]

I actually think the reason it wouldn't work is simple...

 

Chicks despise nice/weak/desperate whatever you want to call it. That's why you see chicks constantly being used as doormats by focking tools... that's what, young women anyway, respond to.

 

I didn't want to believe it for years... but its true.

 

I had a friend who is a total player. He decided to do an experament. He wanted to see if treating them bad actually worked. He called them every filthy name he could, told them about focking their sister (he had) while he was focking them, all sorts of sh!t. They loved it, kept coming back for more.

 

Its sad really, but thats the way it is.

 

See, I dunno. I get plenty of action by just being a normal guy. I'm polite and respectful and listen and all that jazz. Not rich. Not great looking or ripped. Just sort of average.

 

I do think there's probably that fine line between being respectful and being a poosay though, and the line is different for every girl based on how many dance recitals her father attended.

[TheNewGirl 1,031]

When I'm in the mood for no hassle oral I just use a vibrator. It NEVER asks me to make it a sandwich. HTH

 

Also, this.

[TheNewGirl 1,031]

wait... that might work.

 

Anyway, it all comes down to: men are genetically programmed to hook up with as many chicks as possible to make as many cavebabies as possible. Women are programmed to try to keep them around. So in general, men will be into that sort of thing, women not so much.

 

LOL @ cavebabies.

[devin952 1]

Don't know if I can respect any of this. Sex is good, just leave your feelings somewhere eles. Excuses for said sex are a mute pointE.

[penultimatestraw 473]

I actually think the reason it wouldn't work is simple...

 

Chicks despise nice/weak/desperate whatever you want to call it. That's why you see chicks constantly being used as doormats by focking tools... that's what, young women anyway, respond to.

 

I didn't want to believe it for years... but its true.

 

I had a friend who is a total player. He decided to do an experament. He wanted to see if treating them bad actually worked. He called them every filthy name he could, told them about focking their sister (he had) while he was focking them, all sorts of sh!t. They loved it, kept coming back for more.

 

Its sad really, but thats the way it is.

Chicks like confidence - the Venn diagram for which overlaps a lot with asswhole. However, I am certain they go for nice confident guys, too.

 

As to the OP, attractive chicks can get any type of sex any time they want, so I doubt they would ever need a fock buddy. Oral sex in particular (receiving it), is more intimate for women, too. Guys will stick their genitals into anything moist, but women have to be very comfortable with their bodies (which few chicks are) and partners to allow the man in the boat to get polished.

[naomi 343]

Chicks despise nice/weak/desperate whatever you want to call it. That's why you see chicks constantly being used as doormats by focking tools... that's what, young women anyway, respond to.

 

Confidence is pretty important. For me it's mainly important that the guy has a backbone, and an innate sense to be physically protective* of the woman he's with. My sense he has that is intuitive though, I don't have to see it get proven first. I guess I'd just get surprised if I see him live down my perception.

 

A guy can have the above and be nice and respectful. Easily.

 

*Using his brain first for conflict resolution/avoidance is good (and attractive).

[naomi 343]

Chicks like confidence - the Venn diagram for which overlaps a lot with asswhole. However, I am certain they go for nice confident guys, too.

 

When a woman is being healthy about relationships, I think that's the most appealing mix for her by far.

[penultimatestraw 473]

 

When a woman is being healthy about relationships, I think that's the most appealing mix for her by far.

I can't tell you how many of my nice friends spout off the "women go for asswholes" spiel out of disgust, when the real thing they lack is confidence. Women like respect, but they also expect the man to be a man - decisive, strong and capable.

[TheNewGirl 1,031]

Confidence is pretty important. For me it's mainly important that the guy has a backbone, and an innate sense to be physically protective* of the woman he's with. My sense he has that is intuitive though, I don't have to see it get proven first. I guess I'd just get surprised if I see him live down my perception.

 

A guy can have the above and be nice and respectful. Easily.

 

*Using his brain first for conflict resolution/avoidance is good (and attractive).

 

I'm not sure if it would be a perception if all you're using is your intuition...it would be more like an expectation, IMO. You are expecting him to use his brain when being protective, and that he does have a backbone.

 

However, how would you know if these things exist, without seeing them proven?

 

He might exhibit those qualities when talking a big game, but I do think that you will be surprised if he doesn't live up to your expectations.

 

 

Confidence is huge and is what originally attracted me to my husband...that and the fact that he's a big mutherfocker. He had a lot of confidence and wit when talking to me, and was a really nice guy. That said, he does have asswhole qualities, too...but not in the way that he treats me like sh!t. I think that the confidence has some to do with that, since when he's being a jerk it's in a cocky kind of way.

[TheNewGirl 1,031]

I can't tell you how many of my nice friends spout off the "women go for asswholes" spiel out of disgust, when the real thing they lack is confidence. Women like respect, but they also expect the man to be a man - decisive, strong and capable.

 

 

Exactly.

 

I suppose that a man that comes up and offers to give you oral can have those qualities, but women aren't looking for those qualities when it comes to the intimacy or physical parts of a relationship. Like jerry said, it's about the biology of us wanting the decision makers, the strong men to take care of us, and so on. I know women are all about independence and all of that, but we are still looking for those qualities, it's in our biology to want that.

[MedStudent 56]

Is there any dude here (assuming you're single or whatever) that wouldnt or hasnt taken a moped girl up on the offer? If you did or would turn it down, why?

 

I turned away women on 2 occasions in college who I knew could have gotten a bj off of. I was not attracted to either and both were very attracted to me. I was afraid strings would be attached but I'm not sure if I would have done it without strings attached. I have had sexx with no strings attached but they have always been with women I am attracted to.

[nikki2200 4]

I've thought the same thing me.

 

You see a smoking hottie somewhere... what would happen if I walked up and said "Hi, here's my phone number. I know you are way way way out of my league, but if you are ever bored/horny, just call the number and say 'now' and I'll come over, lick you raw, never say a word, and leave quietly."

 

I've never felt like being slapped enough to try it though. Try it and report back.

 

Women need a little more than just the thought of getting off to get turned on. Generally we like to be attracted in some way to our partners whether it's looks, personality, brains... Whereas if any chick walks up to a guy and offers free BJs, he's probably gonna take it 99% of the time. Probably for the same reason there isn't a huge market out there for male prostitutes (the hetero kind). Just getting off isn't really the way women's minds work.

 

Also that is a really creepy thing to do.

[naomi 343]

I'm not sure if it would be a perception if all you're using is your intuition...it would be more like an expectation, IMO. You are expecting him to use his brain when being protective, and that he does have a backbone.

 

However, how would you know if these things exist, without seeing them proven?

 

He might exhibit those qualities when talking a big game, but I do think that you will be surprised if he doesn't live up to your expectations.

 

 

Confidence is huge and is what originally attracted me to my husband...that and the fact that he's a big mutherfocker. He had a lot of confidence and wit when talking to me, and was a really nice guy. That said, he does have asswhole qualities, too...but not in the way that he treats me like sh!t. I think that the confidence has some to do with that, since when he's being a jerk it's in a cocky kind of way.

 

Re: the bold, my sense of a guy in this vein is never informed by him talking himself up. If he's talking himself up and it's not tongue and cheek, that's a turn-off (plus you naturally suspect the opposite when people do that). Let the good stuff about you speak for itself.

 

My intuition/gut sense of a guy forms my perception of him. I recognize the possibility it could be wrong- perception and not reality. I agree that without seeing it proven, it leaves open the possibility of being surprised if it's not lived up to.

[remote controller 133]

I don't give a fock what her tongue does......I want throat!!

[IGotWorms 3,315]

I can't tell you how many of my nice friends spout off the "women go for asswholes" spiel out of disgust, when the real thing they lack is confidence. Women like respect, but they also expect the man to be a man - decisive, strong and capable.

 

Older women (over 26 or so), yes. Younger women, no. Many younger women go for guys that treat them like garbage regardless of the confidence angle.

[titans&bucs&bearsohmy! 2,745]

Older women (over 26 or so), yes. Younger women, no. Many younger women go for guys that treat them like garbage regardless of the confidence angle.

 

This. As women age, some of them actually learn.

 

Ok me... you are a young fella, so I'm gonna throw you some hard won knowledge. Every guy over the age of 30 will back me up here... and I will get set on by the females like a pack of harpies. But whatever.

 

First, to appease the ladies, let me say... the ladies here tend to be old enough that the things they are saying are true. Also, and I mean this as a compliment, they tend to be more male in thought (i.e. rational) or they wouldn't be here. Any woman who comes here reugularly is not typical.

 

Now, that said, here is the kernel of truth...

 

What women THINK they want, and what they ACTUALLY want, are almost never the same thing.

 

Take this lesson to heart. It will save you years of fights where you do exactly what she said she wanted, and is still pissed.

[ADD1CT36 1]

just admit it. you have senioritis.

come visit me and i'll explain it all to you.

[Me_2006 14]

just admit it. you have senioritis.

come visit me and i'll explain it all to you.

After you missed my birthday AND Valentimez day?

[ADD1CT36 1]

After you missed my birthday AND Valentimez day?

 

bah! i came ALL THE WAY OUT THERE

[Me_2006 14]

bah! i came ALL THE WAY OUT THERE

In the bumfuck middle of winter for two days.

[ADD1CT36 1]

In the bumfuck middle of winter for two days.

 

i thought the whole point was to be there for the bumfuck???