BunnysBastatrds 2,705 Posted October 23, 2012 I had a party at my house Saturday night and a bunch of friends came over to see some friends visiting from Texas. We haven't all gotten together in a couple of years so of course we threw a nice big party. So as the night goes on, a cop shows up at my house in full uniform whom I've never seen before. I was told by the Misses that he is our friend Steves new boy toy but don't say anything because he's not really ghey, he's just young and curious. Me: OK. He's got a gun and is with a ghey friend of ours who bangs anything he can get his hands on and I can't say anything about it because he's not ghey yet? Misses: They haven't done anything yet but Steve is really working him. Don't do anything stoopid to run him off. Me: I wonder if he'll let me play with his taser? Copper walked up behind me, pulled out his taser, and showed me how it works. My peeps around me got really nervous and most went inside to get another drink. Poosays. It was one of those tasers that you have physically put on the person getting tazed not the ones that shoot. So I was about to taze myself when the Misses walked back over. Misses: You see? This is what I'm talking about. I ask you not to do anything stoopid and yet you were seconds away from tazing yourself. Copper: I'm sorry Mrs. Bunny. He took the taser away and gave my wife one of those:wub: young boy flirty looks and then begins lecturing me about how the taser is not a toy. Copper: Sir you could have really hurt yourself and got me in a lot of trouble. Unfawkingreal. So as he's looking at my wife smiling and as I get lectured by this man who doesn't know if he wants to put non girly things in his mouth from Stevie or fawk my cougar wife, out of the corner of my vision I see Stevie is giving me the stink eye cause he aint getting it that night. Me: I aint getting any either. Cheers. The Copper then puts his taser away and tells everyone good night as he has to go back to work. Misses: Arsehole!!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
IGotWorms 4,063 Posted October 23, 2012 "Almost"? You're slipping Bunny Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gocolts 300 Posted October 24, 2012 I had a party at my house Saturday night and a bunch of friends came over to see some friends visiting from Texas. We haven't all gotten together in a couple of years so of course we threw a nice big party. So as the night goes on, a cop shows up at my house in full uniform whom I've never seen before. I was told by the Misses that he is our friend Steves new boy toy but don't say anything because he's not really ghey, he's just young and curious. Me: OK. He's got a gun and is with a ghey friend of ours who bangs anything he can get his hands on and I can't say anything about it because he's not ghey yet? Misses: They haven't done anything yet but Steve is really working him. Don't do anything stoopid to run him off. Me: I wonder if he'll let me play with his taser? Copper walked up behind me, pulled out his taser, and showed me how it works. My peeps around me got really nervous and most went inside to get another drink. Poosays. It was one of those tasers that you have physically put on the person getting tazed not the ones that shoot. So I was about to taze myself when the Misses walked back over. Misses: You see? This is what I'm talking about. I ask you not to do anything stoopid and yet you were seconds away from tazing yourself. Copper: I'm sorry Mrs. Bunny. He took the taser away and gave my wife one of those:wub: young boy flirty looks and then begins lecturing me about how the taser is not a toy. Copper: Sir you could have really hurt yourself and got me in a lot of trouble. Unfawkingreal. So as he's looking at my wife smiling and as I get lectured by this man who doesn't know if he wants to put non girly things in his mouth from Stevie or fawk my cougar wife, out of the corner of my vision I see Stevie is giving me the stink eye cause he aint getting it that night. Me: I aint getting any either. Cheers. The Copper then puts his taser away and tells everyone good night as he has to go back to work. Misses: Arsehole!!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Recliner Pilot 61 Posted October 24, 2012 I call bullshiot! Saw the same scenario on a rerun of Petticoat Junction. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mmmmm...beer 822 Posted October 24, 2012 They focking suck. I got shot in the back... the "probes" are literally straightened fish hooks. They sink in nicely when shot from that focker. I got shot in the upper left shoulder blade and the bottom of of right ass cheek. The farther apart they are the more muscle groups effected. Seriously... absolutely focking horrible pain. "Riding the Lightning" we call it is taking the full 5 second cycle. 5 seconds feels like 5 minutes. I've also called it "making him do the robot". Sucks when its you... but pretty enjoyable to watch when its your buddy or a bad guy. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
remote controller 143 Posted October 24, 2012 I had to be tazed to carry a tazer. It sucked. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Let Da Big Dog Eat 42 Posted October 24, 2012 Wonder if you got tazed in the d!ick if it would give you a chubbie? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
smashmouths@blf 33 Posted October 24, 2012 Young and curious? Are u focking kidding me? The "boy toy" is a queer straight up. Wtf? That is all. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BunnysBastatrds 2,705 Posted October 24, 2012 "Almost"? You're slipping Bunny I was well on my way Worms. The only being that stopped me was my darling wifey. I had the safety guard off and that fawker was lighting up like a five volt candle clicking on all cylinders looking for pain when I put it on stun. Listening to that thing snap cracle pop was scary and I was about to let it hit my jugular untill the Missses stoped me. I was "ALMOST" a fallen fawkhead from my own devices and my friends were standing behind me rooting me on. Me: It's on my bucket list to get tazed so I gotta do it. Friends: Do a jello shot first. Me: We good Copper? MRS Bunny: Jesus Christ. Who's gonna clean this mess up and put him in bed? Me: Come here. I got sumfin to show you. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NorthernVike 2,100 Posted October 24, 2012 I was well on my way Worms. The only being that stopped me was my darling wifey. I had the safety guard off and that fawker was lighting up like a five volt candle clicking on all cylinders looking for pain when I put it on stun. Listening to that thing snap cracle pop was scary and I was about to let it hit my jugular untill the Missses stoped me. I was "ALMOST" a fallen fawkhead from my own devices and my friends were standing behind me rooting me on. Me: It's on my bucket list to get tazed so I gotta do it. Friends: Do a jello shot first. Me: We good Copper? MRS Bunny: Jesus Christ. Who's gonna clean this mess up and put him in bed? Me: Come here. I got sumfin to show you. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ If you want to get tazed, take a swing at a cop. They'll be glad to oblige. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patriotsfatboy1 1,433 Posted October 24, 2012 So, after you blew him, did you then take on the construction worker, the Indian and the motorcycle guy in The Village People? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The Elevator Killer 724 Posted October 24, 2012 So, after you blew him, did you then take on the construction worker, the Indian and the motorcycle guy in The Village People? It's fun to stay at the YMCA. You can poop on the rug, you can taz a cajin thug..... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BunnysBastatrds 2,705 Posted October 29 I still haven’t yet checked this off of my bucket list. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites