I Hate Squirels

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[kilroy69 1,039]

" an umbrella decorated with glitter, panties, a bra, and some heavy gauged titty beads." I bet it was black squirels....they need that for their crunk cup full of nuts.

[BunnysBastatrds 1,963]

" an umbrella decorated with glitter, panties, a bra, and some heavy gauged titty beads." I bet it was black squirels....they need that for their crunk cup full of nuts.

Funny. But no. White chin squirrels are the worst. Diseased ridden vermin that act cute but sh!t all over your attic, find places to nest, and eat your cigarettes while pissing off your dog and scaring your poosay.

 

So the green poison cubes offed them all. No more parties in the attic. They're gawking dead. I found the one causing all the stink. Rocky was stuck between the luggage we just bought and the fireplace. Also learned we have a colony of ants up there. They are dead also. Or close to it as the night winds down.

[kilroy69 1,039]

we had some little red ones get into our attic and man they fuckedd up.

[Giants Fan 85]

For some reason, they don't mess stuff up much in the desert. Trade pigeons fro squirells any day. Hawks been sighted though. It's hot and dry ... pigeons days are numbered out here.

[Giants Fan 85]

Fireworks in the nest area for fathers day ...Fock those pigeons.

[Giants Fan 85]

The story about the kid who climbed a clock tower, when I was in college.

 

The guy was a freak, ok.... But there was this big movement, trying to prevent the University from building an observatory on a mountain where there was a red squirrel population, which is unique to that area. They buldozed roads, claered the area for the foundation, and some echo-idiots snuck up there and sabotaged the tractors. NOW, either the University, or it's insurance company, needs to send more money to CATEPILLAR, for new tractors. Good job, idiots. Oh, yeah, and the whole time, like 30 days or whatever it was this hippie lived in a clock tower on University of Arizona campus.

 

Of course, eventually construction was finished, the red squirells survived until, there was a massive wild fire on the mountain. The squirells AND the observatory survived, because fire fighters were able to use roads made for the observatory.

 

Red squirells, a common species, to this day populate the area.

[Giants Fan 85]

Great job ... Dumbass! Get your Patchooli stink outta my store.

[BunnysBastatrds 1,963]

So I'm coaching my daughters softball game and I'm standing just outside the dugout behind a fence that runs from the dugout to the outfield fence line. As I'm barking out orders a squirrelly runs right over my foot and another coaches and keeps running till he gets to home plate backstop and turns right and keeps running pasted the other teams dugout. When it ran over my foot I blurted out "What the motherfawk was that!!!???" All my girls hear it and start laughing. Blue heard it too and came running over to confront and eject me. Me: sorry blue. And pointed to the squirrelly. He smiled and gave me a look and shook his finger.

 

After we won, the other coach who was coaching first base made a stink about it and said she was going to file a formal complaint.

 

Werds out. The squirrels are getting their revenge.

[crackattack 513]

Been killing chipmunks around here. They're destructive little focks too.

[BunnysBastatrds 1,963]

Been killing chipmunks around here. They're destructive little focks too.

Gotta do what you gotta do. Cute or not. Some critters you can scare away. Some you can't. Like raccoons. I won't kill a raccoon. I'll trap them first and let them go free in the wild if I can't scare them. My dog gets the possums. Bunnys get eaten by the hawks and owls. It's the circle of life.

[OldMaid 1,844]

SQUIRREL KILLER!@#!

[BunnysBastatrds 1,963]

SQUIRREL KILLER!@#!

What would you do if they were keeping you up all night, shitting in your crawl spaces with infected feces, nesting, and getting comfortable up in there? Let them live? Would you do the same for rats and mice? Spiders? Big ass coch roaches and ants? Low Riders?

[OldMaid 1,844]

What would you do if they were keeping you up all night, shitting in your crawl spaces with infected feces, nesting, and getting comfortable up in there? Let them live? Would you do the same for rats and mice? Spiders? Big ass coch roaches and ants? Low Riders?

I'd pay to have someone trap and release them. Then I'd hire someone to figure out how they're getting in, and have it fixed.

 

But that's just me...

[BunnysBastatrds 1,963]

I'd pay to have someone trap and release them. Then I'd hire someone to figure out how they're getting in, and have it fixed.

 

But that's just me...

You pay to trap and release rats and mice? What if you were on a tight budget?

[OldMaid 1,844]

You pay to trap and release rats and mice? What if you were on a tight budget?

Rats and mice I could do myself.

[BunnysBastatrds 1,963]

Rats and mice I could do myself.

Hence my destruction of squirrels who cause the same problems as rats and mice. Fleas, rabies, and other destructive behaviors. Are they cute? You bet. Are they dangerous? Yep.

 

So they die when they invade my terroritory. I do them in myself. No difference.

[OldMaid 1,844]

Hence my destruction of squirrels who cause the same problems as rats and mice. Fleas, rabies, and other destructive behaviors. Are they cute? You bet. Are they dangerous? Yep.

So they die when they invade my terroritory. I do them in myself. No difference.

No, you big lunk. I could catch and release mice and rats myself.

[penultimatestraw 473]

What would you do if they were keeping you up all night, shitting in your crawl spaces with infected feces, nesting, and getting comfortable up in there? Let them live?

Jeez, Newbie left after the weekend.

[hoytdwow 202]

We have a shitload of squirrels in our neighborhood. I was thinking of putting poison around to try to thin them out a bit. Luckily they haven't gotten into the attic or anything, but they chewed the roof off our birdhouse and they dig up our potted plants and flowers and dig in the yard and garden. Fockers.

 

Only thing that worries me is having a dog or cat eat the poison as well. Although there is this one random cat that roams around the neighborhood and pees on our back door, so it can die.

[FeelingMN 273]

Was in the process of recapping an old concrete retaining wall in the backyard when I came across a squirrel nest. I had two little red fockers squeaking and squawking at me as they barreled down the tree toward me. Got my ass out of there, sat back and let them clear it out. Seemed like one was on lookout in a tree to my right while the other went inside to retrieve the babies. Saw him carry 3 little fur balls in his mouth to the neighbor's shed. Everyone's in the process of living happily ever after.

 

The chipmunks on the other hand who got into the garage and found mouse bait....haven't seen them around in a while.

 

Dirty focking rodents. I may piss on your tree but I don't try to move in with you. Stay out.

[peenie 1,703]

i don't like squirrels because they eat all the seeds i sit out for the birds.

[BunnysBastatrds 1,963]

You know what's funny????? I'll let any other critter live. I'll go out of my way to save a dragon fly, grass hopper, spider, June bug, that's in my house. They live. But squirrels are going to die.

 

I've gone out if my way to save dragon flys. If I was and will be reincarnated, I hope I'm one if them. Magnificent creatures who perform. Squirrels suck!

[OldMaid 1,844]

You know what's funny????? I'll let any other critter live. I'll go out of my way to save a dragon fly, grass hopper, spider, June bug, that's in my house. They live. But squirrels are going to die.

I've gone out if my way to save dragon flys. If I was and will be reincarnated, I hope I'm one if them. Magnificent creatures who perform. Squirrels suck!

I hope you come back as a squirrel.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[BunnysBastatrds 1,963]

I'd rather be a dragon fly. A beautiful dragon fly.

[BunnysBastatrds 1,963]

I live those!

[BunnysBastatrds 1,963]

You know what else I love..... Sharks. I hope that one dat I get eaten by sharks.

[frank 2,177]

No, you big lunk. I could catch and release mice and rats myself.

But they're both rodents, are they not? And except for the tail, they even rather look alike, don't they?

[BunnysBastatrds 1,963]

But they're both rodents, are they not? And except for the tail, they even rather look alike, don't they?

There's a smoothed one in front if my house that got run over. I smiled.

[frank 2,177]

There's a smoothed one in front if my house that got run over. I smiled.

You don't like them. You don't really know why you don't like them; all you know is you find them repulsive.

[BunnysBastatrds 1,963]

You don't like them. You don't really know why you don't like them; all you know is you find them repulsive.

They got into my shed a few years back. They infested my shed with fleas which I'm turn infested my house with them just from me going in and out if backyard to the inside.

 

They tore my attic up and crapped in places where I have to crawl. They got into my cheap luggage and tried to make a nest. They ate my cigarettes.

 

I didn't always dislike them. I found a baby one once. Gave it to a girlfriend and she did everything she could to raise it health. Feed it milk through a dropper. Let it sleep with a stuffed moose. It had a reaction to something she fed it and was dying. Crazy b!tch tried to give it CPR and mouth to mouth. Was one of the saddest and funniest things I ever saw. He died.

 

Looking back, I should have done more. Maybe bring him to the vet. Channel my enter squirrel and summon the squirell overlords to save him. But I do despise them. With reasonable cause.

[frank 2,177]

They got into my shed a few years back. They infested my shed with fleas which I'm turn infested my house with them just from me going in and out if backyard to the inside.

 

They tore my attic up and crapped in places where I have to crawl. They got into my cheap luggage and tried to make a nest. They ate my cigarettes.

 

I didn't always dislike them. I found a baby one once. Gave it to a girlfriend and she did everything she could to raise it health. Feed it milk through a dropper. Let it sleep with a stuffed moose. It had a reaction to something she fed it and was dying. Crazy b!tch tried to give it CPR and mouth to mouth. Was one of the saddest and funniest things I ever saw. He died.

 

Looking back, I should have done more. Maybe bring him to the vet. Channel my enter squirrel and summon the squirell overlords to save him. But I do despise them. With reasonable cause.

 

Yet I assume you don't share the same animosity with squirrels that you do with rats, do you?

[BunnysBastatrds 1,963]

Yet I assume you don't share the same animosity with squirrels that you do with rats, do you?

They are one in the same.