The American Dream

[vuduchile 1,945]

I was speaking with a client this morning and she started telling me about how she and her husband came to the U.S. from Poland back in the 80's after Martial Law was declared.

 

They made it to NYC with basically no money, scrounged around the Polish community in Queens for a place to stay and started studying/working their arses off.

 

Fast forward 30 some odd years, and her husband is a successful neurosurgeon at Northwestern Medical Center.

 

Her son is also neurosurgeon at Mount Sinai in NY.

 

She recently sold off her Polish restaurant in Chicago and currently spends her time remodeling their recently acquired guest house at their summer home on Lake Michigan. She'll start remodeling the main house next.

 

She doesn't like to visit her son in NY because being in NY reminds her of how poor they were and how dangerous the US seemed to her when she first arrived.

 

I met her husband once and he struck me as a pretty cocky type A. No surprise really.

 

Her hair is red, her accent is thick, her smile is genuine, her life is good and her cans are probably 36D. What more could you want?

[drobeski 3,061]

Sound like they did it right, legally, worked hard, and succeeded. Good for them, too bad they don't breed them like that anymore.

 

Too bad many are encouraged to leach from the system and ignore our laws.

[Cruzer 1,995]

To be a rich, stay at home wife with nothing to do but spend lots of money and remodel various personal homes? Nope - sounds like the American dream.

[BunnysBastatrds 2,441]

Sounds like she has a smelly box.

[vuduchile 1,945]

To be a rich, stay at home wife with nothing to do but spend lots of money and remodel various personal homes? Nope - sounds like the American dream.

Nope?

 

Did you miss the part where she recently sold of her restaurant. She worked as a waitress night and day to help put her husband through med school. She bought the place at some point after he became a surgeon and continued to run it while her son was in school.

[Cruzer 1,995]

Nope?

 

Did you miss the part where she recently sold of her restaurant. She worked as a waitress night and day to help put her husband through med school. She bought the place at some point after he became a surgeon and continued to run it while her son was in school.

I didn't miss it, you presented it as rich hubby bought her a restaurant - she sold it, like a commodity.... You just now presented the waitress part and paying for her hubby to go to school.

[BLS 314]

Sound like they did it right, legally, worked hard, and succeeded. Good for them, too bad they don't breed them like that anymore.

 

Too bad many are encouraged to leach from the system and ignore our laws.

 

They still do; they're just not those born in the US.

 

Those people are hungry and want a better life. American's got it too easy and have little desire.

[kilroy69 1,250]

When I was a kid my mom brought home a Cuban refugee that was working at the local Texico and living behind the station. He was a great dude. He left Cuba on a raft that started to sink. they turned around....he dove off and swam/floated damn near 30 miles.

 

He lived with us a year. in that time he worked 80 hours a week to pay for his brother to get here legally. when his brother got here they moved out and got a house and brought their sister over. then the 3 of them brought their parents over.

 

He started a grocery store that catered to immigrants and has since branched out and expanded. The last time I saw him he was driving a porshe decked out in Armani and banging a super hot blonde. ya know. the American dream.

[TD Ryan2 316]

so... I'm gonna' go on a bit here...

 

The American Dream is built on the idea that if you work hard, play by the rules, stay out of trouble, and essentially "do as your told", then you will be OK - you will have the "middle class" lifestyle, i.e. The American Dream... the house, wife, car, 2 to 3 kids, Little League, a vacation each year, and a modest retirement.

 

The problem with this thinking is that playing by the rules, staying out of trouble, and "doing what you're told" don't apply anymore. This was the recipe for success in the Industrial Economy - the economy of the 20th century.

 

RISK and not following the rules is where it's at now... being Different, NOT fitting in, being unique... and CONNECTING the outliers like yourself. It's the 21st Century - it's the "Connection Economy" where you have to offer and self promote a product that is niche, unique, different, and valued by a niche group.

 

Dr. Polish and Iwanna Stay-at Home can't happen anymore - the cost of Real Estate would prevent them from ever buying a home or restaurant - the cost of Education would prevent them from ever getting the schooling to become an M.D. There is no more "work hard bussing tables and save for college"... you'll be 80 years old before you can afford a single semester.

[TD Ryan2 316]

He started a grocery store that catered to immigrants

 

His hard work is why he survived.

Starting a niche business is why he thrived

[edjr 6,588]

Dusty Rhodes died last summer

[edjr 6,588]

PET ROCKS!!!

 

 

[vuduchile 1,945]

I didn't miss it, you presented it as rich hubby bought her a restaurant - she sold it, like a commodity.... You just now presented the waitress part and paying for her hubby to go to school.

Wrong. I clearly said started studying/working THEIR arses off.

[fandandy 3,313]

Sounds like she has a smelly box.

That's the vibe I got too. Cabbage and urine and old cheese.

[TD Ryan2 316]

That's the vibe I got too. Cabbage and urine and old cheese.

your forgot the kielbasa

[vuduchile 1,945]

Not interested in her 60 yr old cabbage box. But she does seem like a nice person.

[kilroy69 1,250]

 

His hard work is why he survived.

Starting a niche business is why he thrived

He literally was the hardest working dude i have ever met and that is saying a lot.

[Hardcore troubadour 15,430]

He literally was the hardest working dude i have ever met and that is saying a lot.

Why didn't he fight back against Castro? I would fight for my country, not run to another one.

[vuduchile 1,945]

so... I'm gonna' go on a bit here...

 

The American Dream is built on the idea that if you work hard, play by the rules, stay out of trouble, and essentially "do as your told", then you will be OK - you will have the "middle class" lifestyle, i.e. The American Dream... the house, wife, car, 2 to 3 kids, Little League, a vacation each year, and a modest retirement.

 

The problem with this thinking is that playing by the rules, staying out of trouble, and "doing what you're told" don't apply anymore. This was the recipe for success in the Industrial Economy - the economy of the 20th century.

 

RISK and not following the rules is where it's at now... being Different, NOT fitting in, being unique... and CONNECTING the outliers like yourself. It's the 21st Century - it's the "Connection Economy" where you have to offer and self promote a product that is niche, unique, different, and valued by a niche group.

 

Dr. Polish and Iwanna Stay-at Home can't happen anymore - the cost of Real Estate would prevent them from ever buying a home or restaurant - the cost of Education would prevent them from ever getting the schooling to become an M.D. There is no more "work hard bussing tables and save for college"... you'll be 80 years old before you can afford a single semester.

I think taking risks has always been a component of success and always will be.

 

There's no shortage of available space for rent if you want to open a restaurant. Making it successful is a different story, but I could open a place within the next month if I wanted. I've actually looked into opening a shrimp joint here as a second business.

 

And the Polish couple probably did break some rules along the way.

 

For example, it's pretty well known that restaurants that trade with a lot of cash don't always report everything.

 

Beyond that, there are certain immigrant families and communities that are just damned good at helping others succeed once they get here. It's a big generalization but I've seen it in some Greek, Italian, Jewish and Asian communities.

[Cruzer 1,995]

Wrong. I clearly said started studying/working THEIR arses off.

You did, but you failed to present the full story... If the entire point was that you wanted the reader to feel and understand the hardship of working as a waitress to support her husband thru school - you should of said so, not after the fact... As presented - you made it sound like a rich woman, who had a restaurant - sold it and now lives like a Kardashian.

[vuduchile 1,945]

You did, but you failed to present the full story... If the entire point was that you wanted the reader to feel and understand the hardship of working as a waitress to support her husband thru school - you should of said so, not after the fact... As presented - you made it sound like a rich woman, who had a restaurant - sold it and now lives like a Kardashian.

My point was that THEY worked and studied hard to pull themselves up from nothing to get where they are today.

[Cruzer 1,995]

My point was that THEY worked and studied hard to pull themselves up from nothing to get where they are today.

Cool story.. SHOULD of maybe explained her actual working part, less on her lavish spending spree.

[kilroy69 1,250]

Why didn't he fight back against Castro? I would fight for my country, not run to another one.

Man when your country sucks as bad as that why fight for it?

[vuduchile 1,945]

Cool story.. SHOULD of maybe explained her actual working part, less on her lavish spending spree.

I thought it was clear when I said THEY came to the US with no money, THEY worked, and SHE sold HER restaurant.

 

Guess not.

[Cruzer 1,995]

I thought it was clear when I said THEY came to the US with no money, THEY worked, and SHE sold HER restaurant.

 

Guess not.

Owning a restaurant doesn't make the story - lots of rich people own them..... Working as a waitress, putting her husband to school, etc - that drives it home.. You spent more time talking about a spending spree - easy to forget the journey.

[Hardcore troubadour 15,430]

Man when your country sucks as bad as that why fight for it?

I guess.

[kilroy69 1,250]

I guess.

He told horror stories. Sounds like it was basically like mexico is now.

[TD Ryan2 316]

I think taking risks has always been a component of success and always will be.

I think it's become more than a component of success - it's becoming a requirement of survival.

You're gonna' have to take a risk... or fail many times and take many risks and hopefully succeed to join the "upper" class.

 

There will be no middle class - a society spit 80-20 of upper and lower class.

• The 20 comprised of the generationally wealthy and those that worked hard and succeeded on a risk
• The 80 comprised of those that are not hard working and/or those that did not take a risk, they followed the rules, were risk averse, and took an average to slightly above average job (30 - 60k) hoping that a decent education and showing up every day would lead to success - and it won't. There is no middle ground.

[vuduchile 1,945]

<p>

 

I think it's become more than a component of success - it's becoming a requirement of survival.

You're gonna' have to take a risk... or fail many times and take many risks and hopefully succeed to join the "upper" class.

 

There will be no middle class - a society spit 80-20 of upper and lower class.

• The 20 comprised of the generationally wealthy and those that worked hard and succeeded on a risk
• The 80 comprised of those that are not hard working and/or those that did not take a risk, they followed the rules, were risk averse, and took an average to slightly above average job (30 - 60k) hoping that a decent education and showing up every day would lead to success - and it won't. There is no middle ground.

I really don't see this as much different than it has always been.

 

The average "shrinking middle class" family still has 2 cars, 3 TVs, and enough food to ensure a future of gout and type 2 diabetes.

[IGotWorms 4,058]

As a trump supporter, I hate all immigrants. Sorry

[IGotWorms 4,058]

so... I'm gonna' go on a bit here...

 

The American Dream is built on the idea that if you work hard, play by the rules, stay out of trouble, and essentially "do as your told", then you will be OK - you will have the "middle class" lifestyle, i.e. The American Dream... the house, wife, car, 2 to 3 kids, Little League, a vacation each year, and a modest retirement.

 

The problem with this thinking is that playing by the rules, staying out of trouble, and "doing what you're told" don't apply anymore. This was the recipe for success in the Industrial Economy - the economy of the 20th century.

 

RISK and not following the rules is where it's at now... being Different, NOT fitting in, being unique... and CONNECTING the outliers like yourself. It's the 21st Century - it's the "Connection Economy" where you have to offer and self promote a product that is niche, unique, different, and valued by a niche group.

 

Dr. Polish and Iwanna Stay-at Home can't happen anymore - the cost of Real Estate would prevent them from ever buying a home or restaurant - the cost of Education would prevent them from ever getting the schooling to become an M.D. There is no more "work hard bussing tables and save for college"... you'll be 80 years old before you can afford a single semester.

You're overstating it a bit but this is mostly true

[vuduchile 1,945]

Owning a restaurant doesn't make the story - lots of rich people own them..... Working as a waitress, putting her husband to school, etc - that drives it home.. You spent more time talking about a spending spree - easy to forget the journey.

You continue to ignore the fact that I made it clear that THEY came to the US together with nothing.

 

I went on to say THEY worked THEIR arses off and SHE sold HER restaurant.

 

I never once said or implied that HE bought her a restaurant.

 

I can only assume it's because like most geeks, you'd rather eat dirt than admit you made a mistake with your initial post because you misread what I wrote.

 

For chrissakes, even drobeski was able to comprehend that they achieved this together.

 

Congrats torridmdcrecliner.

[TD Ryan2 316]

You're overstating it a bit but this is mostly true

yes - I am -- but I'm trying to make the point.

 

The middle class American does still have those material things, but it is accompanied by a level of debt that was unimaginable in the past... "Indentured Servant" was never part of the American Dream.

 

The scariest part of it all will be the portion of people that work hard, get an education, and take the risk but fail... and can't recover from it.... work hard and get an education used to be enough... it's not anymore, you have to take the risk and hit on it.

[IGotWorms 4,058]

Cool story.. SHOULD of maybe explained her actual working part, less on her lavish spending spree.

Dude, you're kind of a d1ck. And that's coming from ME

[IGotWorms 4,058]

yes - I am -- but I'm trying to make the point.

 

The middle class American does still have those material things, but it is accompanied by a level of debt that was unimaginable in the past... "Indentured Servant" was never part of the American Dream.

 

The scariest part of it all will be the portion of people that work hard, get an education, and take the risk but fail... and can't recover from it.... work hard and get an education used to be enough... it's not anymore, you have to take the risk and hit on it.

Yes that is true.

 

I went to school for 7 extra years and went six figures in debt. I came out OK (not great but good enough). Many of my classmates did not and they are positively focked

 

Even me, my options are basically nil. It's not like I could decide to switch gears and open a business or something. Not with all that I've got invested

[vuduchile 1,945]

yes - I am -- but I'm trying to make the point.

 

The middle class American does still have those material things, but it is accompanied by a level of debt that was unimaginable in the past... "Indentured Servant" was never part of the American Dream.

 

The scariest part of it all will be the portion of people that work hard, get an education, and take the risk but fail... and can't recover from it.... work hard and get an education used to be enough... it's not anymore, you have to take the risk and hit on it.

I can't agree. I personally started over with next to nothing after a divorce years ago. I also had a near financial meltdown in 2008 after being laid off.

 

My wife and I have clawed our way back by opening a biz while she took an avg paying job with good benefits.

 

I'm not upper middle class, and things could turn on a dime, but I'm doing fine for a college dropout with a geek club membership, a hot younger wife and a 12" cack.

[TD Ryan2 316]

and in the end, most people are risk averse... so it makes us all cannon-fodder for the inevitable.

 

What's the inevitable? you go to work for a company where salaries and benefits are increasingly reduced - you showing up, doing a good job, and being responsible is not enough to offer any elite levels of salary or job security.

 

It's not the company's fault... the company is under extraordinary pressure to remain profitable against waves of competition that have far less cumbersome overhead and salary costs.

 

The bottom line is everyone NEEDS $100k for the starter family plan (house, car, healthcare, education, retirement) but no company can pay everyone 100k and its not their fault that what they can afford to pay doesn't provide for today's "middle class" lifestyle.

[vuduchile 1,945]

Yes that is true.

 

I went to school for 7 extra years and went six figures in debt. I came out OK (not great but good enough). Many of my classmates did not and they are positively focked

 

Even me, my options are basically nil. It's not like I could decide to switch gears and open a business or something. Not with all that I've got invested

Where do you believe the blame should be placed for the failure of your classmates?

 

I certainly don't envy their position, but shouldn't they take some responsibility for making a poor educational/career choice?

[TD Ryan2 316]

Where do you believe the blame should be placed for the failure of your classmates?

 

I certainly don't envy their position, but shouldn't they take some responsibility for making a poor educational/career choice?

It's not an easy "blame pie" to figure out.

Some of it is the lie of our culture/society - staying out of trouble and getting good grades DOES NOT mean you'll be OK in life - but it used to.

[edjr 6,588]

Where do you believe the blame should be placed for the failure of your classmates?

 

I certainly don't envy their position, but shouldn't they take some responsibility for making a poor educational/career choice?

 

if worms were a better teammate, his classmates would be doing better