6 Phrases to Get Her into Bed Tonight - Good Luck Geeks

[Ravens 03 0]

Report back tomorrow on your results.

 

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6 Phrases to Get Her into Bed Tonight

By: Nicole Beland

 

These simple linguistic cues tell her you're the right man for this evening.

 

1. "I screwed up, and want to hear your thoughts."

Whether you blabbed a good friend's secret or ran over the neighbor's limited-edition bike, admit it. Confessing an error in judgment leaves you exposed and vulnerable, which makes a woman want to wrap you in her arms. Telling her about it wins her over even more—you're showing that you value her opinion. The resulting combo of compassion and confidence will inspire her to make everything all better—or at least distract you.

 

2. "Did you know you have a heart-shaped freckle on the back of your left thigh?"

After the first few months of sex, inch-by-inch body exploration yields to cut-to-the-chase carnality. That's a shame, because having her body mapped puts a woman in the mood for luxurious sex. Pull aside the blankets on a weekend morning and run your eyes and fingertips from her toes to her earlobes, making admiring comments along the way. You won't get past her elbows before she pulls you in for a deep, wet kiss.

 

3. "I'm organizing a team of volunteers for Summit for Someone."

Whether it's climbing mountains with inner-city kids or carrying the neighbor's groceries, helping others boosts your sexy factor for two reasons. First, altruism shows her that you can put your own needs aside, which inspires her to take care of them for you. Second, your good deeds make her feel as if she's dating up, because clearly you're a better person than she is. She'll want to join forces with you on your life's quest.

 

4. "You must be exhausted. Let's take a hot shower and I'll scrub your back."

The number-one reason your partner turns down sex is because she's stressed. And while she knows there's no better cure for wound-up nerves than a spring-release orgasm, it can be hard to shake off the day's distractions. By blasting the hot water and lighting candles, you'll offer a tension-melting solution she can't refuse. Once the hot water and your soapy hands chase the stress away, she'll finally feel sexy again.

 

5. "I want to accomplish a few key things in the next 5 years."

When a woman hears a man talk about the future with a "whatever" attitude, her level of respect for him drops and her thighs snap shut. She was surrounded by way too many of those directionless dudes back in college, and she has learned that men who have clear goals and realistic plans for achieving them are rare. She'll appreciate your farsightedness all the more. Making up your mind settles hers, as well.

 

6. "I'm taking the day off tomorrow to chaperone my niece's field trip."

While a woman is impressed by a man who's driven to succeed, she's even more tantalized by a striver who's willing to put a family member first—extra points if that family member is under 12. She'll instantly flash-forward to when you're the sweet, caring father of her children, at which point her heart will go all gooey. Come back from your kiddie outing with a cute stuffed animal for her and she'll practically drag you into bed.

[Patriotsfatboy1 1,433]

Report back tomorrow on your results.

 

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I saw this last week and I tried them out. Here is what happened:

1. "I screwed up, and want to hear your thoughts."

Her: "You're damn right you screwed up! You focking bastard.... (three hours later)... How is that for my thoughts?"

Me:

 

2. "Did you know you have a heart-shaped freckle on the back of your left thigh?"

Her: "Are you calling me fat? You focking bastard.... (three hours later)... "

Me: sleep

 

3. "I'm organizing a team of volunteers for Summit for Someone."

Her: "How about your organize a team to paint the focking house, clean the gutters, rake the leaves, clean the focking house and all of the rest of the focking sh!t that I have to do all day so that I can sit on Facebook all day and eat my bon-bon's. You focking bastard.... (three hours later)... "

Me: sleep

 

 

4. "You must be exhausted. Let's take a hot shower and I'll scrub your back."

Her: "You're damn right I am exhausted! I have been running around all day and have not had a chance to even think. How about you clean the focking shower and I will eat some bon-bons? You focking bastard.... (three hours later)... "

Me:

 

5. "I want to accomplish a few key things in the next 5 years."

Her: "How about accomplish a few things around here, like paint the focking house, clean the gutters, rake the leaves, clean the focking house and all of the rest of the focking sh!t that I have to do all day so that I can sit on Facebook all day and eat my bon-bon's. You focking bastard.... (three hours later)... "

Me:

 

6. "I'm taking the day off tomorrow to chaperone my niece's field trip."

Her: "You don't have a focking niece, you focking pedophile! You focking bastard.... (three hours later)... "

Me:

 

Notice a trend here?

[RLLD 4,275]

This approach might work on your 20-something GF or fiance of some sh!t. In the real world wimmen are selfish pigs, and no matter how much you give they will always expect more, as if you owe them something.

[Ravens 03 0]

This approach might work on your 20-something GF or fiance of some sh!t.

 

So try it on your 20-something GF then & let us know.

 

[RLLD 4,275]

So try it on your 20-something GF then & let us know.

 

 

Thanks for reminding me that those days are LONG gone....

[MedStudent 56]

I saw this last week and I tried them out. Here is what happened:

1. "I screwed up, and want to hear your thoughts."

Her: "You're damn right you screwed up! You focking bastard.... (three hours later)... How is that for my thoughts?"

Me:

 

2. "Did you know you have a heart-shaped freckle on the back of your left thigh?"

Her: "Are you calling me fat? You focking bastard.... (three hours later)... "

Me: sleep

 

3. "I'm organizing a team of volunteers for Summit for Someone."

Her: "How about your organize a team to paint the focking house, clean the gutters, rake the leaves, clean the focking house and all of the rest of the focking sh!t that I have to do all day so that I can sit on Facebook all day and eat my bon-bon's. You focking bastard.... (three hours later)... "

Me: sleep

4. "You must be exhausted. Let's take a hot shower and I'll scrub your back."

Her: "You're damn right I am exhausted! I have been running around all day and have not had a chance to even think. How about you clean the focking shower and I will eat some bon-bons? You focking bastard.... (three hours later)... "

Me:

 

5. "I want to accomplish a few key things in the next 5 years."

Her: "How about accomplish a few things around here, like paint the focking house, clean the gutters, rake the leaves, clean the focking house and all of the rest of the focking sh!t that I have to do all day so that I can sit on Facebook all day and eat my bon-bon's. You focking bastard.... (three hours later)... "

Me:

 

6. "I'm taking the day off tomorrow to chaperone my niece's field trip."

Her: "You don't have a focking niece, you focking pedophile! You focking bastard.... (three hours later)... "

Me:

 

Notice a trend here?

 

I don't think these tips are for married guys unless you intend to cheat on your wife.

[RLLD 4,275]

I don't think these tips are for married guys unless you intend to cheat on your wife.

 

For the married man, death is the only escape....

[edjr 6,898]

For the married man, death is the only escape....

or purchasing a bar

[jerryskids 7,085]

Let's start a list for married geeks:

 

1. "If we have sex now, you can watch Dancing with the Stars uninterrupted tonight."

 

GO!@#

[kutulu 1,703]

Let's start a list for married geeks:

 

1. "If we have sex now, you can watch Dancing with the Stars uninterrupted tonight."

 

GO!@#

 

I'll be going with the old standby, "Hey, hon...how about a hummer?"

 

I estimate my chances tonight at about 70%.

[MedStudent 56]

I use a variation of number 2 all the time. You just pick out something on the woman- coud be any part of her body or something she does.

"You're the best kisser."

"You have the most beautiful eyes i have ever gazed into".

"You have the softest skin i have ever touched"

 

Shiit like that sounds corny but chicks eat compliments up.

 

My favorite thing to do is tell a woman that she is beautiful. and then she will say something like:"you're just saying that" or "no, i am not" then you look her in the eyes and say slowly "I really mean it".

 

You might be exagerating the truth a bit but it makes them feel good so I see no harm.

 

The other things on that list sound like too much work. Number 1 makes you sound like a loser.

[phillybear 366]

GOON. HAND.

 

Any other technique/phrase is for queers.

[Patriotsfatboy1 1,433]

Let's start a list for married geeks:

 

1. "If we have sex now, you can watch Dancing with the Stars uninterrupted tonight."

 

GO!@#

 

2. "Look honey. Diamonds!"

 

Ron White: "You know those DeBeers diamond commercials? They've become more truth in advertising. First it was, 'A diamond is forever,' then 'It will take her breath away,' then 'Diamonds: Leave her speechless.' "

 

Translation is... that'll shut her up!"

[jerryskids 7,085]

I use a variation of number 2 all the time. You just pick out something on the woman- coud be any part of her body or something she does.

"You're the best kisser."

"You have the most beautiful eyes i have ever gazed into".

"You have the softest skin i have ever touched"

 

Shiit like that sounds corny but chicks eat compliments up.

 

My favorite thing to do is tell a woman that she is beautiful. and then she will say something like:"you're just saying that" or "no, i am not" then you look her in the eyes and say slowly "I really mean it".

 

You might be exagerating the truth a bit but it makes them feel good so I see no harm.

This is true. I love my wife's ass esp. seeing it during doggie; it's not her favorite position but she loves that I love it, and she invariably asks what I see when I'm slapping into her. The other day I had her roll onto her knees, and she said something like "you haven't done that in a while, I was thinking my ass was fat."

 

Also, there is some truth to #5, although that particular line is a bit of the ghey. Chicks dig guys with power and control.

 

Anyway, back to the new list:

 

"Honey, let's do some role play. I'll pretend you are Megan Fox, and you pretend your Megan Fox."

[RLLD 4,275]

"Honey, let's do some role play. I'll pretend you are Megan Fox, and you pretend your Megan Fox."

 

[Frank M 181]

I'll be going with the old standby, "Hey, hon...how about a hummer?"

 

I estimate my chances tonight at about 70%.

 

If my wife said "Hey , hon...how about you eat me out?", her chances would be about 100%. If I said "Hey, hon...how about a hummer?", my chances would be about 30-40%.

 

Something I'll never figure out.

[titans&bucs&bearsohmy! 2,745]

Let's start a list for married geeks:

 

1. "If we have sex now, you can watch Dancing with the Stars uninterrupted tonight."

 

GO!@#

 

I find the best way to go is to praise something profusely. Like, "A bunch of guys at work were talking about how their wives give horrible head. So bad, the turn it down. I just thought to myself how lucky I am that you are sooo good."

 

This works especially well if you mention how said guys at work are all sleeping around on the wives.

[wiffleball 4,797]

I saw this last week and I tried them out. Here is what happened:

1. "I screwed up, and want to hear your thoughts."

Her: "You're damn right you screwed up! You focking bastard.... (three hours later)... How is that for my thoughts?"

Me:

 

2. "Did you know you have a heart-shaped freckle on the back of your left thigh?"

Her: "Are you calling me fat? You focking bastard.... (three hours later)... "

Me: sleep

 

3. "I'm organizing a team of volunteers for Summit for Someone."

Her: "How about your organize a team to paint the focking house, clean the gutters, rake the leaves, clean the focking house and all of the rest of the focking sh!t that I have to do all day so that I can sit on Facebook all day and eat my bon-bon's. You focking bastard.... (three hours later)... "

Me: sleep

4. "You must be exhausted. Let's take a hot shower and I'll scrub your back."

Her: "You're damn right I am exhausted! I have been running around all day and have not had a chance to even think. How about you clean the focking shower and I will eat some bon-bons? You focking bastard.... (three hours later)... "

Me:

 

5. "I want to accomplish a few key things in the next 5 years."

Her: "How about accomplish a few things around here, like paint the focking house, clean the gutters, rake the leaves, clean the focking house and all of the rest of the focking sh!t that I have to do all day so that I can sit on Facebook all day and eat my bon-bon's. You focking bastard.... (three hours later)... "

Me:

 

6. "I'm taking the day off tomorrow to chaperone my niece's field trip."

Her: "You don't have a focking niece, you focking pedophile! You focking bastard.... (three hours later)... "

Me:

 

Notice a trend here?

 

Pats - It's been a long focking time since we've had this kind of around here. Thanks for the flashback to the good old days.

 

"Why don't you organize a team to paint the house!"

[wiffleball 4,797]

I use a variation of number 2 all the time. You just pick out something on the woman- coud be any part of her body or something she does.

"You're the best kisser."

"You have the most beautiful eyes i have ever gazed into".

"You have the softest skin i have ever touched"

 

Shiit like that sounds corny but chicks eat compliments up.

 

My favorite thing to do is tell a woman that she is beautiful. and then she will say something like:"you're just saying that" or "no, i am not" then you look her in the eyes and say slowly "I really mean it".

 

You might be exagerating the truth a bit but it makes them feel good so I see no harm.

 

The other things on that list sound like too much work. Number 1 makes you sound like a loser.

 

let me help you out there cubby:

 

 

You: You're asbolutely beautiful tonight.

 

Her: Oh, Thank You!

 

You; No, that's not a compliment. That's just a fact.

 

Her:

 

You:

 

Her:

[naomi 360]

Just reserve that for when it's honest too and

[wiffleball 4,797]

Just reserve that for when it's honest too and

 

Always amazes me how wimmens value honesty and sincerity -

 

And yet, are the lyingest, most insincere phony fothermockers on the planet. - even with each other.

[bob_probert_2000 1]

If you are married for over 5 years and don't own a few gallons diethyl ether and a 55 gallon drum of astrolube, you're doing it wrong and are doomed to a life of locked bathroom doors and images of the freak you used to bang in collge.

[BLS 314]

Always amazes me how wimmens value honesty and sincerity -

 

And yet, are the lyingest, most insincere phony fothermockers on the planet. - even with each other.

 

 

There is truth within this one's post.

 

Women will always ask you if "these jeans make me look fat", praying to god you'll say 'No'.

Even if she's pushing 3 spins on the old analog scale, and you say "no, babe, not at all" she'll slurp that up like it's truth from Heysoose himself.

 

But tell her once that her dinner tastes like sh1t and you're focked.

 

But she'll ALWAYS tell you to BE HONEST WITH ME.

 

Focking chics.

 

See ladies....this is why God invented Anal sex.

Because you don't really like it, and we get to pay you back...just a little bit for all the crap you put us through just because you have a vagina.

And here's the thing...your vagina isn't even that good. I mean, sure at one time, it might have felt alright, but not since you've had entire sporting teams run through ya during college.

 

And you complain you 'can't feel the sides'. Meh.

Roll over.

[jerryskids 7,085]

Just reserve that for when it's honest too and

What does this have to do with getting laid?

[jocstrap 8]

Let's start a list for married geeks:

 

1. "If we have sex now, you can watch Dancing with the Stars uninterrupted tonight."

 

GO!@#

 

 

Hey honey, just a friendly reminder. It's been 7 weeks and 2 days. Isn't your vagina ready for a pounding now? I know you've healed up from the birth of our daughter. Time to think about me now - I have patiently waited without harrassing you. Your window of me being nice is about over. Not like it's going to last very long, then you'll be back on your way. TIA

[naomi 360]

What does this have to do with getting laid?

Right...it would limit the potential there.

 

I really don't know what to say here (generally to wiff and BLS's sentiments). It's not how I operate and I'm a woman, but you guys will say that's impossible. So

 

There's questions I won't ask because I'm pretty sure the negative answer is reality at that moment I'm concerned about it (stuff like...does my hair look crappy?) Don't want to force him to share something that disappoints me.

 

If there is something I'm really not sure about, I won't ask unless I know emotionally I'll be okay if the negative is the answer.

 

If I'll be at peace with the negative answer, but I know that he really wouldn't want to give it because he doesn't know I'll be okay with it, then won't ask.

 

Never thought about that before, it's just default stuff. Never experienced it lessening the more familiar a guy has become. Really don't understand operating another way.

 

My ex told me I think like a guy though. BUT often times what I'm seeing is that what a lot of guys complain about they do themselves so...it can't be that.

 

eta: That last part sounds too superior. Don't think like a guy (he was inwardly all emo'ed out at the time, was trying to counterbalance it), and there's purpose and strength in why there's differences between how men and women think, even though from our immediate perspectives it looks like it's for the worse.

[jerryskids 7,085]

Right...it would limit the potential there.

 

I really don't know what to say here (generally to wiff and BLS's sentiments). It's not how I operate and I'm a woman, but you guys will say that's impossible. So

 

There's questions I won't ask because I'm pretty sure the negative answer is reality at that moment I'm concerned about it (stuff like...does my hair look crappy right now?) Don't want to force him to share something that disappoints me.

 

If there is something I'm really not sure about, I won't ask unless I know emotionally I'll be okay if the negative is the answer.

 

If I'll be at peace with the negative answer, but I know that he really wouldn't want to give it because he doesn't know I'll be okay with it, then won't ask.

 

Never thought about that before, it's just default stuff. Never experienced it lessening the more familiar a guy has become. Really don't understand operating another way.

 

My ex told me I think like a guy though. BUT often times what I'm seeing is that what a lot of guys complain about they do themselves so...it can't be that.

"Think like a guy?" I read your post above and, like many other times, I have no idea wtf you are talking about. You think less like a guy than anyone I internet-know. Anyway, I talked to my wife about this thread earlier, and she laughed. She admits that she, like most women, wants a guy who is powerful and aggressive, with a swagger short of cackiness, to take control. Most of the OP points were metrosexual bullshiot. BTW, she has two engineering degrees from Michigan so it is not like she is a ditz. But she is honest with her femininity, which I think a lot of women these days aren't. Sorry if this was harsh, you know I like you.

[Patriotsfatboy1 1,433]

"Think like a guy?" I read your post above and, like many other times, I have no idea wtf you are talking about. You think less like a guy than anyone I internet-know. Anyway, I talked to my wife about this thread earlier, and she laughed. She admits that she, like most women, wants a guy who is powerful and aggressive, with a swagger short of cackiness, to take control. Most of the OP points were metrosexual bullshiot. BTW, she has two engineering degrees from Michigan so it is not like she is a ditz. But she is honest with her femininity, which I think a lot of women these days aren't. Sorry if this was harsh, you know I like you.

I could not agree more. I can't understand the thoughts that come from naomi in these threads. Definitely not thinking like a guy.

 

 

BTW - Did your wife identify with my post in this one?

[naomi 360]

"Think like a guy?" I read your post above and, like many other times, I have no idea wtf you are talking about. You think less like a guy than anyone I internet-know. Anyway, I talked to my wife about this thread earlier, and she laughed. She admits that she, like most women, wants a guy who is powerful and aggressive, with a swagger short of cackiness, to take control. Most of the OP points were metrosexual bullshiot. BTW, she has two engineering degrees from Michigan so it is not like she is a ditz. But she is honest with her femininity, which I think a lot of women these days aren't. Sorry if this was harsh, you know I like you.

 

Edited something to that because I don't think I do either.

 

In short...what BLS communicated about a woman's thought process I can't relate to.

 

Agree with your wife. Except...don't like cockiness, so if it's just short of cockiness, that's too close.

 

Actually (personally) blanket saying "powerful and aggressive" probably sends the wrong message. A guy acting powerful and aggressive all the time wouldn't be good. But if you are in sync with each other, and he is connecting with that side of him when it's welcomed and it compliments you, then that's good.

[Me_2006 14]

Couldn't you just act disinterested and nonchalant? I mean every hot chick I meet that finds out I'm waiting automatically wants to fock my brains out.

 

 

Or will your wives just go take a nap or something? I don't know anything about married life.

[kilroy69 1,268]

Couldn't you just act disinterested and nonchalant? I mean every hot chick I meet that finds out I'm waiting automatically wants to fock my brains out.

Or will your wives just go take a nap or something? I don't know anything about married life.

Works for me pretty well. Of course its easier to act that way if you are already focking 1-2 other women.

[jerryskids 7,085]

Edited something to that because I don't think I do either.

 

In short...what BLS communicated about a woman's thought process I can't relate to.

 

Agree with your wife. Except...don't like cockiness, so if it's just short of cockiness, that's too close.

 

Actually (personally) blanket saying "powerful and aggressive" probably sends the wrong message. A guy acting powerful and aggressive all the time wouldn't be good. But if you are in sync with each other, and he is connecting with that side of him when it's welcomed and it compliments you, then that's good.

Apparently you can say "cockiness" here. Anyway, I said swagger. And it goes back to caveman days; women are drawn to the strongest guys, so that they and their progeny can survive. Back then it was mostly physical strength, the ability to fight off the saber tooth tiger. Today it is more wealth/success/confidence. If you are instead drawn to the hopeless artistic loser, have fun with that, but you are destined to evolutionary obscurity.

[naomi 360]

Apparently you can say "cockiness" here. Anyway, I said swagger. And it goes back to caveman days; women are drawn to the strongest guys, so that they and their progeny can survive. Back then it was mostly physical strength, the ability to fight off the saber tooth tiger. Today it is more wealth/success/confidence. If you are instead drawn to the hopeless artistic loser, have fun with that, but you are destined to evolutionary obscurity.

Swagger short of cockiness, right. Thinking the person with that is going to be just short of cocky. Disagree with you on what makes men and women naturally how they are, but do agree with you that most women are going to find strength attractive. For me strength doesn't always equate into wealth or even necessarily success. Well intentioned plans can fail. Having drive is good, not being insecure is good, but the polar opposite of insecurity is unrealistic. There's a verse in Isaiah that resonates with me "Cease ye from man, whose breath is in his nostrils: for wherein is he to be accounted of?" (some people take that to mean avoid nose breathers, definitely not the meaning there) Any person who glories in himself is deluded. But strength of character is There's other aspects of strength that's good, but I'll leave it on mostly secular terms. Didn't say I was drawn to hopeless artistic losers.

[kutulu 1,703]

I'll be going with the old standby, "Hey, hon...how about a hummer?"

 

I estimate my chances tonight at about 70%.

 

Did I say 70%? I meant 7%

[titans&bucs&bearsohmy! 2,745]

I'll just go with the tried and true "keep poking her in the back with my cack until she lets me put it in to get rid of me" method.

[kutulu 1,703]

Tonight I pump her full of booze and get some halftime action.

[jerryskids 7,085]

Tonight I pump her full of booze and get some halftime action.

Gotta be careful; women have a fine line between horny-drunk and

[kutulu 1,703]

Gotta be careful; women have a fine line between horny-drunk and

 

I'm golden. She's out tonight and will get home right about kickoff...which is also close enough to the rugrats bedtime to ensure they are when it's time to Actually, I need to worry about putting myself to by doing to much and messing up my chance to

[jerryskids 7,085]

I'm going for a massage later this morning; wife asked if I wanted to meet for lunch, then we can come home and

 

This is shaping up to be a greta day!

[MedStudent 56]

I'm going for a massage later this morning; wife asked if I wanted to meet for lunch, then we can come home and

 

This is shaping up to be a greta day!

 

You going to get a happy ending from the masseuse?