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I had a nooner today


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#1 NewbieJr

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 02:33 PM

The little woman and I were texting this morning and conversation turned to an intimate session we shared last weekend. Then advanced to a few things I told her I wanted to do to her and her telling me things she wanted to do to me. She told me she was "dripping", so I talked her into meeting me at my place at 11:30. Was there till almost 1:00.  Gotta love getting laid while on the clock. :thumbsup:


Mine is small, but the head spins.

#2 Filthy Fernadez

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 02:37 PM

Some people get screwed daily at work although they probably don't enjoy it the way you did.  :banana:


BBC for the most part is pretty damn good.


#3 cyclone24

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 02:42 PM

I was telling a buddy the other day that if I was single at 43 right now if I had to do any more than text a girl for sex I probably might not get laid again.

Can I just make a blanket rule for the board that if you're going to you have a I got laid post it requires a photo? Can we all just agree to that one?
"Let me wobble back to me corner"--Connor Mcgregor

#4 Hardcore troubadour

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 02:53 PM

Pathetic. Ed jr and Kilroy post about some recent sex doings and of course, "look at me too" Newbie has to chime in win one of his own. You banged your girlfriend of some years? Way to go man.

#5 edjr

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 02:55 PM

Pathetic. Ed jr and Kilroy post about some recent sex doings and of course, "look at me too" Newbie has to chime in win one of his own. You banged your girlfriend of some years? Way to go man.

 

:doublethumbsup:


posty


#6 posty

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 02:58 PM

Pathetic. Ed jr and Kilroy post about some recent sex doings and of course, "look at me too" Newbie has to chime in win one of his own. You banged your girlfriend of some years? Way to go man.


:doublethumbsup:

Either that or "Fiction Friday" is a couple of days early...

Also, can't wait for the name calling replies by Newbie also...

#7 NewbieJr

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 02:59 PM

Pathetic. Ed jr and Kilroy post about some recent sex doings and of course, "look at me too" Newbie has to chime in win one of his own. You banged your girlfriend of some years? Way to go man.

The relationship might not be new, but running home for a lunchtime not-so-quickie is.  :banana:

 

And sorry dude.  These posts have to hurt to read for a guy who has sex once a month and thinks anything except missionary is "gross"  :(


Mine is small, but the head spins.

#8 Meglamaniac

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 02:59 PM

The little woman and I were texting this morning and conversation turned to an intimate session we shared last weekend. Then advanced to a few things I told her I wanted to do to her and her telling me things she wanted to do to me. She told me she was "dripping", so I talked her into meeting me at my place at 11:30. Was there till almost 1:00.  Gotta love getting laid while on the clock. :thumbsup:

Does that mean you had tossed salad for lunch :overhead:


Debt paid in full!

#9 NewbieJr

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 03:00 PM

I was telling a buddy the other day that if I was single at 43 right now if I had to do any more than text a girl for sex I probably might not get laid again.

Can I just make a blanket rule for the board that if you're going to you have a I got laid post it requires a photo? Can we all just agree to that one?

For as much as she's a 'butt nut', she's actually shy about pics. I've tried to get sex pics multiple times.  No go.  :(


Mine is small, but the head spins.

#10 cyclone24

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 03:02 PM

For as much as she's a 'butt nut', she's actually shy about pics. I've tried to get sex pics multiple times.  No go.  :(


Ahh yeah i hear ya. Girls are weird. Fock em in the ass...no problem then you want one pic where shes garbling two cacks at the same time and they get weird.

Wait....what.
"Let me wobble back to me corner"--Connor Mcgregor

#11 Hardcore troubadour

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 03:03 PM

The relationship might not be new, but running home for a lunchtime not-so-quickie is.  :banana:
 
And sorry dude.  These posts have to hurt to read for a guy who has sex once a month and thinks anything except missionary is "gross"  :(


And edjr's and Kilroys stories were interesting and had pics. Yours was boring and pathetic. HTH

#12 NewbieJr

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 03:05 PM

And edjr's and Kilroys stories were interesting and had pics. Yours was boring and pathetic. HTH

Yet I can always get my little pet monkey to open my threads and comment.  :wave:


Mine is small, but the head spins.

#13 Patriotsfatboy1

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 03:12 PM

The Mrs. and I have had to resort to doing it in the morning after the kids are off to school. No other time available nowadays.


Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, son.

#14 edjr

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 03:14 PM

The Mrs. and I have had to resort to doing it in the morning after the kids are off to school. No other time available nowadays.

 

The rest of us take care of her while you're at work


posty


#15 Patriotsfatboy1

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 03:14 PM

 

The rest of us take care of her while you're at work

 

If you want sloppy seconds, feel free. :dunno:


Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life, son.

#16 edjr

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 03:19 PM

 

If you want sloppy seconds, feel free. :dunno:

 

we watch old NHL games with Claude coaching


posty


#17 Frozenbeernuts

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 03:22 PM

As look at me as it gets. Most of us have done it at some point, but the fake tan, highlighted hair, and gym obsession means you are probably more of a look at me type person than most. Hey its a personality trait. Some people just have those quirks

#18 NewbieJr

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 03:30 PM

As look at me as it gets. Most of us have done it at some point, but the fake tan, highlighted hair, and gym obsession means you are probably more of a look at me type person than most. Hey its a personality trait. Some people just have those quirks

Feel free to ignore threads you don't care for.  Seems like such an easy concept.  :dunno:


Mine is small, but the head spins.

#19 NewbieJr

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 03:34 PM

I wish I had more exciting pictures. She's a 'no photo' type lover, unfortunately. 

 

But to prove this isn't some made up thing like poor, desperate Hardcore thinks...here are some before and after texts leading to our lunchtime rendezvous

 

Before lunch.  Horny chickie...

http://i.imgur.com/xlboSYS.jpg

 

 

After...satisfied and flustered chickie...

http://i.imgur.com/mtSgL0U.jpg


Mine is small, but the head spins.

#20 Meglamaniac

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 03:38 PM

I wish I had more exciting pictures. She's a 'no photo' type lover, unfortunately. 

 

But to prove this isn't some made up thing like poor, desperate Hardcore thinks...here are some before and after texts leading to our lunchtime rendezvous

 

Before lunch.  Horny chickie...

http://i.imgur.com/xlboSYS.jpg

 

 

After...satisfied and flustered chickie...

http://i.imgur.com/mtSgL0U.jpg

I was expecting something like this

 

Bloodninja: I lick your earlobe, and undo your watch.
Sarah19fca: mmmm, okay.
Bloodninja: I take yo pants off, grunting like a troll.
Sarah19fca: Yeah I like it rough.
Bloodninja: I smack you thick booty.
Sarah19fca: Oh yeah, that feels good.
Bloodninja: Smack, Smack, yeeeaahhh.
Bloodninja: I make some toast and eat it off your ass. Land O' Lakes butter all in your crack. Mmmm.
Sarah19fca: you like that?
Bloodninja: I peel some bananas.
Sarah19fca: Oh, what are you gonna do with those?
Bloodninja: get me peanuts. Peanuts from the ballpark.
Sarah19fca: Peanuts?
Bloodninja: Ken Griffey Jr. Yeaaaaahhh.
Sarah19fca: What are you talking about?
Bloodninja: I'm spent, I jump down into the alley and smoke a fatty. I throw rocks at the cats.
Sarah19fca: This is stupid.
Bloodninja: Stone Cold Steve Austin gives me some beer.
Bloodninja: Wanna Wrestle Stone Cold?
Bloodninja: Yeeaahhhh.
Sarah19fca: /ignore
Bloodninja: Its cool stone cold she was a ###### anyway.
Bloodninja: We get on harleys and ride into the sunset.


Debt paid in full!

#21 mmmmm...beer

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 03:39 PM

Fock u crabby b!tches...

Cool story bro :thumbsup:
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#22 NewbieJr

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 03:40 PM

Fock u crabby b!tches...

Cool story bro :thumbsup:

Thanks brother. Thought it might be a fun story for some.  People only want politics and insults I guess.  :dunno:


Mine is small, but the head spins.

#23 Frozenbeernuts

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 03:43 PM

Feel free to ignore threads you don't care for.  Seems like such an easy concept.  :dunno:


How would I know it's a cry for attention until I open it :dunno:

#24 NewbieJr

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 03:44 PM

How would I know it's a cry for attention until I open it :dunno:

Well now you know.  Toodles :wave:


Mine is small, but the head spins.

#25 wiffleball

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 04:04 PM

I wish I had more exciting pictures. She's a 'no photo' type lover, unfortunately. 

 

But to prove this isn't some made up thing like poor, desperate Hardcore thinks...here are some before and after texts leading to our lunchtime rendezvous

 

Before lunch.  Horny chickie...

http://i.imgur.com/xlboSYS.jpg

 

 

After...satisfied and flustered chickie...

http://i.imgur.com/mtSgL0U.jpg

OH GROSS! 

 

I could never have secks with a woman who can't properly conjugate the verb "shake". 

 

 

 

 

(JK)


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#26 NewbieJr

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 04:06 PM

OH GROSS! 

 

I could never have secks with a woman who can't properly conjugate the verb "shake". 

 

 

 

 

(JK)

Yeah, I saw that.  I may dump her tonight.  Told her we have to talk 


Mine is small, but the head spins.

#27 Frozenbeernuts

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 04:15 PM

Well now you know.  Toodles :wave:


Ok I didn't mean for that to come off so dlckheadish. I apologize. I am a little jealous since I don't know that I could ever get off the clock for sex. The downside of being hourly

#28 Filthy Fernadez

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 04:19 PM

Seriously, give props to the dudes getting it whether or not you agree with them politically.

Newbie getting it on someone else's dime. Fock yeah :cheers:

BBC for the most part is pretty damn good.


#29 NewbieJr

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 04:20 PM

Ok I didn't mean for that to come off so dlckheadish. I apologize. I am a little jealous since I don't know that I could ever get off the clock for sex. The downside of being hourly

There ya go. I knew you be civil and have a little fun. :thumbsup:

 

And it's not something I can do regularly. The stars aligned.


Mine is small, but the head spins.

#30 NewbieJr

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 04:20 PM

Seriously, give props to the dudes getting it whether or not you agree with them politically.

Newbie getting it on someone else's dime. Fock yeah :cheers:

Atta boy Filthy.  Men should be happy for men.


Mine is small, but the head spins.

#31 Baker Boy

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 04:42 PM

So this was like Billy getting laid in One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest.
"I don't want to belong to any club that would have Wiff as one of their members"

#32 NewbieJr

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 04:43 PM

So this was like Billy getting laid in One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest.

Show us your wife's sexy texts, grampa.  They'd be cave paintings.


Mine is small, but the head spins.

#33 Filthy Fernadez

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 04:44 PM

Show us your wife's sexy texts, grampa.  They'd be cave paintings.


Okay.....that was :lol:

BBC for the most part is pretty damn good.


#34 Brad GLuckman

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 04:53 PM

I want to know why your phone has a 100% charge regardless of time of day.

Is that the Moby case thing?

Edit: I'm a moron

#35 NewbieJr

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 05:53 PM

I want to know why your phone has a 100% charge regardless of time of day.

Is that the Moby case thing?

Edit: I'm a moron

lol. OK, I'm glad you caught yourself. ;)
Mine is small, but the head spins.

#36 posty

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 06:18 PM

Shooken?

:wall:

#37 NewbieJr

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 06:22 PM

Shooken?

:wall:

all those sexy words and that's the one that catches your eye? Lol oh yeah, she's not nine.
Mine is small, but the head spins.

#38 jerryskids

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 06:43 PM

Congrats Newbie, seems you've got a good one.  :cheers:  For being married 23+ years my wife and I still have great sex (in fact better than when we got married), but she has never been into sexting let alone naughty pics.  It is like she is prepping for a career in politics; she can be a freak in the bed but no evidence.  :D  

 

Also we both work from home so pretty much all of our sex is nooners.  Obviously the thrill is gone for us since we've done it so many times, but it is nice to take a work break that way.  :thumbsup:


"I wouldnt even consider sitting out, I love pedo threads." -- tanatastic

 

#39 NewbieJr

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 06:44 PM

Congrats Newbie, seems you've got a good one.  :cheers:  For being married 23+ years my wife and I still have great sex (in fact better than when we got married), but she has never been into sexting let alone naughty pics.  It is like she is prepping for a career in politics; she can be a freak in the bed but no evidence.  :D  
 
Also we both work from home so pretty much all of our sex is nooners.  Obviously the thrill is gone for us since we've done it so many times, but it is nice to take a work break that way.  :thumbsup:

thanks brother. She's a little bit quirky at times but she's definitely a good catch.
Mine is small, but the head spins.

#40 jerryskids

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Posted 15 February 2017 - 06:49 PM

thanks brother. She's a little bit quirky at times but she's definitely a good catch.

 

I apologize if you've discussed it, but what's her scoop?  Married before?  Kids?  Casual or looking long term? :cheers:


"I wouldnt even consider sitting out, I love pedo threads." -- tanatastic