Spinoff: who would you kill & how would you do it?

[cmh6476 1,023]

go

[Toro 1]

Swerski.

 

Poison Meatnormous Omelette Sandwich.

[cmh6476 1,023]

osama bin laden

 

with the candlestick, in the kitchen

[paulinstl 296]

[surferskin 30]

i don't know who i'd kill...yet. but it always seemed like taking someone deep sea fishing trip and pushing them over the side would best way to get away with it.

[Q.Lazzarus 0]

I'm big on strangulation myself...The look in their eyes...The power that I feel...it's better than sex.

[Dick Hertz 1]

:reported:

[surferskin 30]

:reported:

 

alright, i figured out "who".

[GobbleDog 995]

i don't know who i'd kill...yet. but it always seemed like taking someone deep sea fishing trip and pushing them over the side would best way to get away with it.

 

EXACTLY.

 

Living in Orlando, I could have my boat in the Atlantic ocean in under an hour. A quick drive offshore - I already have a couple of heavy anchors and good strong wire on board. An hour later, I'm back home eatin tuna-fish samiches.

 

What happened?

[fricker66 93]

The drunk driver who blew a stop sign and crashed into our minivan with my pregnant wife and daughter in the back.

 

I'd take shards of glass and slowly push them into his face, then down his neck until he slowly bled to death.

[Electric Mayhem 35]

The drunk driver who blew a stop sign and crashed into our minivan with my pregnant wife and daughter in the back.

 

I'd take shards of glass and slowly push them into his face, then down his neck until he slowly bled to death.

 

Isn't your daughter a little young to be preggers? Bad parenting.

[fricker66 93]

Isn't your daughter a little young to be preggers? Bad parenting.

 

Maybe I'll kill you instead.

[phillybear 366]

Fish in a barrel, my friend, fish in a barrel. Here's one...

 

Sneak up behind them, and punch them in the back of the head. As they are staggered, flat on the ground, swoop in, put your feet as leverage against their torso, and yank their arm clear out of its socket. You may need a knife if the skin prevents the full separation of the arm from the body. Anyway, pick up the dismembered limb, and start to pummel them about the body, but focus the heavy end on the skull. Their state of shock and loss of blood will prevent them from fighting back. When you tire of beating them with their own arm, sissy slap them with the hand. “Why are you hitting yourself? Why are you hitting yourself?” After a couple of hours, coat them in honey, drop them in the middle of several fire ant swarms and pop open a beer. Gather the bones and dump them in a blazing hot furnace.

 

That’s all there is to it.

[D'ohmer Simpson 0]

osama bin laden

At least you seem concerned about him.

 

"I don't know where bin Laden is. I have no idea and really don't care. It's not that important. It's not our priority."

- G.W. Bush, 3/13/02

 

"I am truly not that concerned about him."

- G.W. Bush, repsonding to a question about bin Laden's whereabouts,

3/13/02 (The New American, 4/8/02)

 

[parrot 789]

EXACTLY.

 

Living in Orlando, I could have my boat in the Atlantic ocean in under an hour. A quick drive offshore - I already have a couple of heavy anchors and good strong wire on board. An hour later, I'm back home eatin tuna-fish samiches.

 

What happened?

AKA, the Scott Peterson plan. How'd that work out for him?

[Q.Lazzarus 0]

Fish in a barrel, my friend, fish in a barrel. Here's one...

 

Sneak up behind them, and punch them in the back of the head. As they are staggered, flat on the ground, swoop in, put your feet as leverage against their torso, and yank their arm clear out of its socket. You may need a knife if the skin prevents the full separation of the arm from the body. Anyway, pick up the dismembered limb, and start to pummel them about the body, but focus the heavy end on the skull. Their state of shock and loss of blood will prevent them from fighting back. When you tire of beating them with their own arm, sissy slap them with the hand. “Why are you hitting yourself? Why are you hitting yourself?” After a couple of hours, coat them in honey, drop them in the middle of several fire ant swarms and pop open a beer. Gather the bones and dump them in a blazing hot furnace.

 

That’s all there is to it.

[Electric Mayhem 35]

Maybe I'll kill you instead.

 

Via your cooking?

[brinett9 0]

The Video Professor.

 

I'd stuff 'Free Lesson CDs" down his throat until he asphyxiated.

[fricker66 93]

Via your cooking?

 

Look at you...get laid a few times, and you think you own the world...

[D'ohmer Simpson 0]

Look at you...get laid a few times

urban legend

[GobbleDog 995]

AKA, the Scott Peterson plan. How'd that work out for him?

 

He rented a boat. Had weak rope - poor knotts. And only drove into the bay.

 

 

GobbleDog Peterson would have gotten away with it.

[Electric Mayhem 35]

Look at you...get laid a few times, and you think you own the world...

 

No, no, this is the postmortem relationship bitterness creativity. It's true what they say - you have to suffer to create.

[surferskin 30]

Fish in a barrel, my friend, fish in a barrel. Here's one...

 

Sneak up behind them, and punch them in the back of the head. As they are staggered, flat on the ground, swoop in, put your feet as leverage against their torso, and yank their arm clear out of its socket. You may need a knife if the skin prevents the full separation of the arm from the body. Anyway, pick up the dismembered limb, and start to pummel them about the body, but focus the heavy end on the skull. Their state of shock and loss of blood will prevent them from fighting back. When you tire of beating them with their own arm, sissy slap them with the hand. “Why are you hitting yourself? Why are you hitting yourself?” After a couple of hours, coat them in honey, drop them in the middle of several fire ant swarms and pop open a beer. Gather the bones and dump them in a blazing hot furnace.

 

That’s all there is to it.

 

wow, i'm aroused.

[fricker66 93]

No, no, this is the postmortem relationship bitterness creativity. It's true what they say - you have to suffer to create.

 

I'm sorry to hear that. I've been a bit absent from the boards lately. I missed the breakup.

[Electric Mayhem 35]

I'm sorry to hear that. I've been a bit absent from the boards lately. I missed the breakup.

 

first time I've mentioned it

[jerryskids 6,781]

Fish in a barrel, my friend, fish in a barrel. Here's one...

 

Sneak up behind them, and punch them in the back of the head. As they are staggered, flat on the ground, swoop in, put your feet as leverage against their torso, and yank their arm clear out of its socket. You may need a knife if the skin prevents the full separation of the arm from the body. Anyway, pick up the dismembered limb, and start to pummel them about the body, but focus the heavy end on the skull. Their state of shock and loss of blood will prevent them from fighting back. When you tire of beating them with their own arm, sissy slap them with the hand. “Why are you hitting yourself? Why are you hitting yourself?” After a couple of hours, coat them in honey, drop them in the middle of several fire ant swarms and pop open a beer. Gather the bones and dump them in a blazing hot furnace.

 

That’s all there is to it.

I'd ask phillybear to do it, and buy him a hooker as reward.

[GobbleDog 995]

first time I've mentioned it

It's interesting that you mentioned it in this thread.

 

Well, hey Joe! I said where you going with that gun in your hand....?

I'm going down to shoot my old lady. You know I caught her messin around with another man....

 

[Electric Mayhem 35]

It's interesting that you mentioned it in this thread.

 

Well, hey Joe! I said where you going with that gun in your hand....?

I'm going down to shoot my old lady. You know I caught her messin around with another man....

 

 

 

She has enough problems already without me coming after her. Trust me.

[brinett9 0]

What, nobody else gonna join forces with me against The Video Professor?

[fricker66 93]

 

She has enough problems already without me coming after her. Trust me.

 

We all assumed this from the fact that she was dating you.

[Recidivist 1]

Mike FF Today / Bare hands

[Electric Mayhem 35]

We all assumed this from the fact that she was dating you.

 

I really shouldn't wear that "Alchoholics, Bi-Polars and Otherwise Mentally Unstable Women Wanted" T-Shirt anymore. It just causes me heartache.

[kutulu 1,676]

BIRD FLU:

 

SmartassBoiler, Rusty Syringes, BiPolarBear, Spider fantasy, -jb-, George Carlin, KSB2424, D_House, Hitfreak, NewbieJr, SUXBNME, dolfan06, brinett9, golden eagles, TAS, Strike, Foamfinger, lambert58, redtodd, sawilson, xxx, VikesNation, MrSpanky, surferskin, mjj, parrot, KayJay1971, Polski Rules, Outback, bob_probert_2000, crackattack, Toro, illiterate, swirvenirvin, thePIMPmaster, Jessy, Jeremy, footballpowers, Isotopes, Korben Dallas, bigmarc27, kilroy69, Gravely, Patriotsfatboy1, Cdub100, ###### Cheney, JScott, Shaft41, Spergon Wynn, dcOne, swandown, Voltaire, avoiding injuries, lindust20, frajita, jerryskids, scottk, Rude Rick, Churchill610, DauntesInferno, Mrdirt73, GettnHuge, hdamien, swamp dog, Recidivist, Call me...Tim?, ArnieBragg, Mark Buffington, galmgren, The Elevator Killer, Uh-huh, GutterBoy, BG711, PIK 95, fatsean, [zombie]

 

 

[sawilson 1]

The debil living in my backyard...

 

Anyway humanly possible....

[scottk 0]

BIRD FLU:

 

SmartassBoiler, Rusty Syringes, BiPolarBear, Spider fantasy, -jb-, George Carlin, KSB2424, D_House, Hitfreak, NewbieJr, SUXBNME, dolfan06, brinett9, golden eagles, TAS, Strike, Foamfinger, lambert58, redtodd, sawilson, xxx, VikesNation, MrSpanky, surferskin, mjj, parrot, KayJay1971, Polski Rules, Outback, bob_probert_2000, crackattack, Toro, illiterate, swirvenirvin, thePIMPmaster, Jessy, Jeremy, footballpowers, Isotopes, Korben Dallas, bigmarc27, kilroy69, Gravely, Patriotsfatboy1, Cdub100, ###### Cheney, JScott, Shaft41, Spergon Wynn, dcOne, swandown, Voltaire, avoiding injuries, lindust20, frajita, jerryskids, scottk, Rude Rick, Churchill610, DauntesInferno, Mrdirt73, GettnHuge, hdamien, swamp dog, Recidivist, Call me...Tim?, ArnieBragg, Mark Buffington, galmgren, The Elevator Killer, Uh-huh, GutterBoy, BG711, PIK 95, fatsean, [zombie]

 

I made it, I made it.....I'm finally someone!!!

 

Giantsfan with an ice knife in the dead of winter.........j/k

[Ravens 03 0]

[TAS 2]

I'm big on strangulation myself...The look in their eyes...The power that I feel...it's better than sex.

 

Have Brinett9 "Battleship" him from the top of the partitions of a mens bathroom stall!

[jocstrap 8]

Take someone into the desert or deep woods - bury them to their neck - pry open their mouth with a couple pieces of wood so they can't shut it. place a 1 foot stick coated in honey to the back of their throat to about 8 inches out on the ground , and watch all the little creatures eat him up from the inside out.

 

Just a thought anyway.

[Evil number 0]

High powered rifle shot to the skull. splat!

[SUXBNME 1,498]

Take someone into the desert or deep woods - bury them to their neck - pry open their mouth with a couple pieces of wood so they can't shut it. place a 1 foot stick coated in honey to the back of their throat to about 8 inches out on the ground , and watch all the little creatures eat him up from the inside out.

 

Just a thought anyway.

 

That is the Alabama way, I'm sure..