My Ex wife did the unthinkable.

[TheNewGirl 1,496]

Just some tips:

 

Alot of cell phones do have a "record" option on them. I would utilize this.

As far as the emails are concerned, don't only print them out, but make sure you save a soft copy as well.

 

Also...you need to bait her into conversations that are recorded. If she goes out drinking all the time, call her right around the time the bars close. She'll be drunk, and will likely talk about whatever the hell you want to. If she wants to get back together, you could definately use that to your advantage to get her to tell you exactly what you (and the judge) need to hear. That would be my approach. I don't know if that stuff is allowed in court or whatever, if not, then go for the emails.

 

Good luck man

 

Some states are two party states which require you to disclose that you're taping them, others you don't need to disclose to someone if they are being recorded...check to see if your state is a two party state. If you're a two party state and you don't disclose this, they can sue YOU.

[gocolts 300]

So let me see if I got this right.

 

She's done stuff you probably don't want to even get into here (and I don't blame you).

She understands how hard it is on a kid to move him around, but does it anyway.

She blows off the fact her son blames her for the failed marriage and continues to partake in unhealty activities for him to be around.

She BLAMES YOU for not helping her enough, after she split with you, moved away and only lets you see him once a week.

She's OK pawning him off to you, as long as she knows she's still got some coin coming.

 

She's a real fuckin winner Colts. A REAL winner.

 

If you give this fuckin b1tch the time of day, I'll personally come kick you in the sack.

I have a buddy of mine, who although has his faults, is a great freakin dad, not only to his son, but to his ex's first child (her daughter).

They split after he lost his job, and subsequently his house (because she couldn't hold a job for sh1t).

She's the EXACT same way as your ex...and my buddy is a fuckin SUCKER for her everytime she comes crawling back.

 

I finally figured out why....because he doesn't understand WHY she left HIM when he wasn't at fault. Therefore he has some sort of inner need to satisfy his own ego that in fact it wasn't his fault, and he always takes her back.

 

I finally told him after the 3rd time this went down, and she then put a restraining order on HIM, that if he went back to her, he and I were done as friends, because there was no other way to let him know that NOBODY approves of this situation.

 

He has finally cut the cord, so to speak, and SWEARS he won't go back...but I'm not holding my breath.

 

You know I'm right. Everyone you know has TOLD you "she's crazy", "she's trouble", "she's no good for you".

You know what I mean......don't you....

 

You better get creative buddy. Find a way to get him out of there. NOW.

 

My buddy's ex's daughter, is now 13, and she's already doing some pretty scary stuff; IE following right down mommy's path.

She'll be pregnant by the time she's 18 (just like mommy was) and her WHOLE life will be a struggle to be anything normal SIMPLY because of the environment she grew up in.

 

I'm telling you Colts....NOW is the time...before it's too late.

You have it pretty much. I will not be getting back with her. I was trying until I found out she was seeing other people immediately after she left. I didn't find this out until the day we were divorced. I haven't considered taking her back since I found that out until yesterday. Like I said, all kinds of crazy shiat went through my mind on ways to get him out of that situation including taking her back. I will NOT take her back. I wouldn't be surprised if she wound up getting an STD and just wants to give it to me. Thanks for the comments and you and TNG and others have just helped remind me why this taking her back thing is a very bad idea. I knew that was the case, I just needed a kick in the arse.

[BLS 314]

You have it pretty much. I will not be getting back with her. I was trying until I found out she was seeing other people immediately after she left. I didn't find this out until the day we were divorced. I haven't considered taking her back since I found that out until yesterday. Like I said, all kinds of crazy shiat went through my mind on ways to get him out of that situation including taking her back. I will NOT take her back. I wouldn't be surprised if she wound up getting an STD and just wants to give it to me. Thanks for the comments and you and TNG and others have just helped remind me why this taking her back thing is a very bad idea. I knew that was the case, I just needed a kick in the arse.

 

 

Glad to hear it Colts!

[gocolts 300]

OK....Now I feel like I've already swallowed the bait.

 

She stole $40k from a former job and that is inhibiting her chances of employment? OMFG....I can't understand why....

 

If you're being totally for real dude....this is classic. I will probably tell my friends at softball this story on Thursday.

 

You could always tell her you'll cut her up into 500 different pieces and bury each in a different town if she doesn't give up custody.

I know people.....for a nominal fee, of course.

I am being totally real. Not only did she steal over 40 grand from her employer, but at the same time she ran up all the credit cards and left me with 25,000 dollars worth of credit card debt. I didn't know any of this was happening. She hid this stuff pretty good. I got the mail one day and opened one of my credit card statements. It said it had over 9000 bucks on it. I was like WTF??? I called the credit card company and said there must be a mistake. They said you haven't been drawing out 300 bucks every few days from the ATM?? I was like hell no I haven't. Then I went to my wallet and discovered most of my credit cards were missing. That is right when the shiat hit the fan on all this money crap. I asked her where my other cards were and she gave them to me from her purse. I asked how much was on them. She said they were all pretty much maxed out.

 

By all means, tell them. Maybe somebody that hears this can learn something from this mess.

[swashbuckler 0]

Dude...I sympathize with you. I'm "that guy", too. Actually I'm more like BLS's friend.

 

I have a son with this real crazy b1tch.

 

In a nutshell:

 

We met, we drank, we got dirty, we drink,, I'm a dik, her crazyness surfaces, I become world class dik, I cheated (havent since), we drank some more, she got pregnant, we have a son, I'm still a world class dik, she cheats, she drinks, she cheats some more...and again (not exactly sure how many times...fidelity isnt exactly her stong point), I'm still the dik, she still drinks, :8years later: I'm a dik, she drinks, I drink, I got desperate, she got pregnant, I drink...I drink some more, she says its mine, I say shes f&king crazy considering her multiple partners at the time, she becomes human again (for the most part) and is a sweet nice gal now.

 

I'm losing my friends because most of them have been seeing whats goin on for quite some time and for some reason and I have absolutely noooo sense to just leave.

 

She will not go. I've told her, she's left, she comes back (she never goes far). I will not have him live with her without me although I am finally to the point to where I'm not sure I should be concerned about that anymore considering I just need out. But she comes up with any reason why she can't or won't start living more of a seperate life (pretty much my fault for stickin' around) from me.

 

Point of the story is...everyone can see WTF is up with this chick. You are obviously blinded by something more concerning to you than many of the issues presented here. She has become a virus. The last thing on your mind should be contaminating you life moreso with her back in it. Assuming what you say here is true, you probably have more of a case of custody than you think. If you need some lovin...you're better off rubbin' one out before gettin' too close to givin' your son a little brother or sister.

 

Good luck to you.

[gocolts 300]

Dude...I sympathize with you. I'm "that guy", too. Actually I'm more like BLS's friend.

 

I have a son with this real crazy b1tch.

 

In a nutshell:

 

We met, we drank, we got dirty, we drink,, I'm a dik, her crazyness surfaces, I become world class dik, I cheated (havent since), we drank some more, she got pregnant, we have a son, I'm still a world class dik, she cheats, she drinks, she cheats some more...and again (not exactly sure how many times...fidelity isnt exactly her stong point), I'm still the dik, she still drinks, :8years later: I'm a dik, she drinks, I drink, I got desperate, she got pregnant, I drink...I drink some more, she says its mine, I say shes f&king crazy considering her multiple partners at the time, she becomes human again (for the most part) and is a sweet nice gal now.

 

I'm losing my friends because most of them have been seeing whats goin on for quite some time and for some reason and I have absolutely noooo sense to just leave.

 

She will not go. I've told her, she's left, she comes back (she never goes far). I will not have him live with her without me although I am finally to the point to where I'm not sure I should be concerned about that anymore considering I just need out. But she comes up with any reason why she can't or won't start living more of a seperate life (pretty much my fault for stickin' around) from me.

 

Point of the story is...everyone can see WTF is up with this chick. You are obviously blinded by something more concerning to you than many of the issues presented here. She has become a virus. The last thing on your mind should be contaminating you life moreso with her back in it. Assuming what you say here is true, you probably have more of a case of custody than you think. If you need some lovin...you're better off rubbin' one out before gettin' too close to givin' your son a little brother or sister.

 

Good luck to you.

Thanks for the well wishes. I made the drinking comment because in about a 10 year relationship, my ex wife drank a total of twice. She drank more in the first month she bailed than she did the entire time we were married.

[DAVID RUFFIN 2]

You/ve been given some good advice by a few well intentioned geeks. Keep us posted and remember that your son is all that matters.

[gocolts 300]

You/ve been given some good advice by a few well intentioned geeks. Keep us posted and remember that your son is all that matters.

[gocolts 300]

I think little gocolts needs to go stay with grandma for a while until gocolts and hocolts get their lives in order.

What's not in order in my home???

[jerryskids 6,825]

She knows about this place and has even posted a few times here, JK hit on her. I told the next day after I got that pic that I posted it here and she was like

I had a few minutes and that thread seemed vaguely familiar, so I found it:

 

Link

 

Scroll up to the top and read the whole thing. Clearly I was upset with the recent breakup of my relationship with Sux, and I was looking for your life partner as rebound sex. Sorry about that.

[gocolts 300]

I had a few minutes and that thread seemed vaguely familiar, so I found it:

 

Link

 

Scroll up to the top and read the whole thing. Clearly I was upset with the recent breakup of my relationship with Sux, and I was looking for your life partner as rebound sex. Sorry about that.

No problem. I was laughing about it as it unfolded.

[mighty_thor 115]

Nope. She has been living off the child support this whole time. She is always claiming to try and find a job. Just yesterday she said she was going to get serious about getting one. That was probably the 10th time I heard that. She even has cable TV and I can't afford it. Yet she tells my son that I have money and that she doesn't. I bring in less than 15,000 a year. I get kinda pissed when he tells him this stuff. "Mommy says you have more money and it's just you, mommy and I don't get as much as you and it's two of us." I tell him mommy needs to get a job, to which he says she is trying. I always want to say "Well son, you are supporting your mother for a year and half and you're only 8."

 

She says she is having a hard time finding a job because of what happened at one of her former places of employment where she stole over 40 grand and got caught. I found out about it the day she went to jail for it. I didn't boot her out after that, I just said we will find away. She even used some of my sons child support to pay restitution to keep herself out of jail. She has had several jobs since then but always just quit them with no plan whatsoever.

 

So your ex stole over 40 grand from a previous employer and got caught!

 

Now she is thinking about taking out a restraining order on her boyfriend? My advice is that you should encourage her to get the restraining order. Fill out all the paper work and just let her sign the form if you have to. This restraining order will help your case as well. the best thing would be for her to state the exact quote from the ex-bf on the rstraining order application/form. this will give you the evidence you need.

 

The fact that she is a crook and hangs out with unstable people is huge in a custody case.

 

Do you have some ghosts in your closets that would come out in a custody battle? I don't know why you are being such a puzzy with regards to the custody. I get the feeling you want your ex back. You have not even tried to get another woman.

[Mephisto 15]

Yeah.

 

Try and get full custody of your son. I am sure telling the courts that she's admited to doing some of this stuff, and dates suicidal crazies would go in your favor.

 

And you're delusional.

[BLS 314]

I get the feeling you want your ex back. You have not even tried to get another woman.

 

[phillybear 366]

I had a few minutes and that thread seemed vaguely familiar, so I found it:

 

Link

 

Scroll up to the top and read the whole thing. Clearly I was upset with the recent breakup of my relationship with Sux, and I was looking for your life partner as rebound sex. Sorry about that.

 

How the fock did you find a thread this old? Was this thread after Latin Pimp?

[jerryskids 6,825]

How the fock did you find a thread this old? Was this thread after Latin Pimp?

Member search: "gocol"

Click on "gocolt's wife"

View posts.

 

 

LatinPimp was before that, no?

[Angry White Male 0]

T&Ps, good buddy.

[TheNewGirl 1,496]

And you're delusional.

 

Aw, I was waiting for you to chime in on that comment!

[jerryskids 6,825]

Aw, I was waiting for you to chime in on that comment!

Mephisto is always good for constructive support in child custody cases.

[Baby Jesus 0]

After reading this whole thread, one thing is clear.

 

The kid is better off with his mom.

[cortezthekiller303 0]

I would have to see the snatch pics to give any advice on them.

 

 

Something tells me that the kind of girl that sends snatch pics to gocolts is the kind of girl that I will take a pass on seeing snatch pics from.

[TheNewGirl 1,496]

Mephisto is always good for constructive support in child custody cases.

 

I posted that comment knowing full well that he'd see it, and tell me I was crazy for even suggesting that gocolts try and get custody.

[peenie 1,915]

nothing to add, just wishing you well. so sorry you're going through this.

[Me_2006 14]

I finally figured out why....because he doesn't understand WHY she left HIM when he wasn't at fault. Therefore he has some sort of inner need to satisfy his own ego that in fact it wasn't his fault, and he always takes her back.

Man, you've got no idea how bad I needed to read that shit. Thanks dude. Wasn't directed towards me, but damn good point.

[tikigods 76]

Wow. I just read through most of this and I would say stay the fock out of that mess. I feel for you, man. Pretty shiity that they are playing mind games with your son. Rite Aid sells over the counter paternity tests for like 20 bucks. Just a thought...

[Me_2006 14]

also, have you tried seeing her when she's drunk and trying to get her to hit you? If you can prove she's violent and likes to drink a lot then you might have a better shot with the custody battle than just proving she's a nut that likes to get her fock on. Cause sadly, that's a LOT of single mom's today and it doesn't mean jack in court.

[jerryskids 6,825]

I posted that comment knowing full well that he'd see it, and tell me I was crazy for even suggesting that gocolts try and get custody.

I know.

[IGotWorms 4,058]

Do you have some ghosts in your closets that would come out in a custody battle? I don't know why you are being such a puzzy with regards to the custody. I get the feeling you want your ex back. You have not even tried to get another woman.

 

This may have been harshly worded by mighty thor, but I bet its true. Time to get over her gocolts.

[Kanil 520]

My advice would be to talk to a lawyer who specializes in fathers custody cases. My fiance's father has one here in Colorado that has helped him through 2 divorces (only 1 where kids where an issue). I did a quick google search and found a link to a fathers rights attorney in Indiana.

 

http://www.stanleyrobison.com/PracticeArea...ild-Custody.asp

 

I'd say give him a call and setup a time to explain the situation to him. At the very worst he could say "you're focked" and at the very best you get your son back into a more stable/sane environment. It may cost you some money but most attorneys are willing to work out a payment plan (and it can't be more than what another 10 years of your ex's leeching is going to cost you).

[Boz/BoFan 0]

Stop dating/marrying trash. Go get your son for the love of god. Find the shittbag who wants to go out the easy way and tell him if he wants an audience you'll watch, laugh, record, and put the video online if he wishes. Let him know if he does it in front of your kid you'll kill every member of his immediate family he has left, if its less than three you'll move to cousins.

[Quickolas1 80]

between you two as parents, this kid has no chance...

 

...at being anything more than a drug addict or burger flipper in west virginia or wherever your types live

 

sorry

[Rattlesnake 0]

Again, he is going to identify more with you, the same sex parent. He's going to learn how to treat others and how to have others treat you, FROM YOU.

 

[Angry White Male 0]

I bring in less than 15,000 a year.

I'm no elitist, and I know you want your son back, but maybe you should think about improving your self first.

 

I don't see how it's possible to support both yourself and a kid on that kind of income without being a leech. Kid is 8, he's going to need someone to watch him when you're at work. Childcare is expensive. Do you get healthcare through your job now? Is it good enough for your kid?

 

Just some things to think about. You want to be a positive role model for your kid, bettering yourself will help you do that. You definitely don't want to teach him that government handouts are the way to go.

 

Best of luck.

[Mephisto 15]

Mephisto is always good for constructive support in child custody cases.

 

I can offer him plenty of support. I just can't help but roll my eyes at those who think just because of the situation he describes, he can "just go get" the child. He can't. He's a father. Trust me, the hurdles that fathers have to get over to get 50/50 custody, let alone primary custody, and rarer still - sole custody - are steeper than some in this thread apparently realize.

 

Countless women in this world have perpetrated far worse than his wife and retained custody of their children over willing, fit fathers.

[Frank M 181]

Well, before everyone starts tripping all over themselves over poor gocolts and his terrible situation, let's not forget how self righteous and judgmental he is to others. I'm thinking what goes around comes around. Sucks for the kid, but how much better off is he going to be with a guy who has so little compassion and understanding in his heart that he avoids family members simply because they're gay and spends inordinate amounts of time on a message board spewing right wing propaganda?

 

The kid will have a hard life in either situation.

[heavy-set 39]

you are divorced?

 

sorry to hear. good luck though

[mighty_thor 115]

I can offer him plenty of support. I just can't help but roll my eyes at those who think just because of the situation he describes, he can "just go get" the child. He can't. He's a father. Trust me, the hurdles that fathers have to get over to get 50/50 custody, let alone primary custody, and rarer still - sole custody - are steeper than some in this thread apparently realize.

 

Countless women in this world have perpetrated far worse than his wife and retained custody of their children over willing, fit fathers.

 

If Kevin Federline can get custody then he has a chance. I know one guy at work who got custody of his sons but his wife was pretty whacked out. If the wife is halfway normal then he does'nt have a chance but this woman is a crook and is endangering the child with her actions. I certainly would look into custody if that was the case.

 

In the situation that he is describing i'd be tempted to kidnap my son.

[Mephisto 15]

If Kevin Federline can get custody then he has a chance. I know one guy at work who got custody of his sons but his wife was pretty whacked out. If the wife is halfway normal then he does'nt have a chance but this woman is a crook and is endangering the child with her actions. I certainly would look into custody if that was the case.

 

In the situation that he is describing i'd be tempted to kidnap my son.

 

Kevin Federline had more than $15,000/year to draw from... a team of high-priced attorneys... and an ex-wife who was publicly going completely fruit-loop and endangering the lives of her children.

 

Don't use Federline as a benchmark.

 

I'm not saying don't go for custody. Quite the contrary. Don't for one second believe it isn't going to be a near impossible accomplishment. Many fathers don't get custody of their children until they're dead at the hands of a biological mother or her new boyfriend.

[TheNewGirl 1,496]

 

I am literally shocked at this response from Rattlesnake.

 

[TheNewGirl 1,496]

I can offer him plenty of support. I just can't help but roll my eyes at those who think just because of the situation he describes, he can "just go get" the child. He can't. He's a father. Trust me, the hurdles that fathers have to get over to get 50/50 custody, let alone primary custody, and rarer still - sole custody - are steeper than some in this thread apparently realize.

 

Countless women in this world have perpetrated far worse than his wife and retained custody of their children over willing, fit fathers.

 

Hey, I never said that his trying to get custody wouldn't be an easy task. I side with you in many ways when it comes to this, and I firmly believe that fathers should have just as many rights as mothers.

 

The road that he would have ahead of him to try and get his son full time wouldn't be an easy one and would likely take lots of time and money.

 

However...

 

Taking that risk is something that gocolts isn't even considering, the way that I read it. He woudl rather get back together with this ho that try and get full custody and raise his child properly. I dont' think that he's even willing to look into it, talk to an attorney, talk to SOMEONE to help him out with this. He'd rather jack around with the boyfriend, restraining orders, cooter pics from his ex and so on. Sorry if this sounds ###### gocolts, but I really think that you need to get off of your butt and do something more.