I’m Doing Stand-Up This Month…

[BunnysBastatrds 2,606]

…for the very first time on open mic night.Any suggestions on a bit?

[5-Points 3,766]

That's awesome! 

Talk about what you know. Use personal experiences for your bits. 

Good luck! 

 

[BunnysBastatrds 2,606]

1 minute ago, 5-Points said:

That's awesome! 

Talk about what you know. Use personal experiences for your bits. 

Good luck! 

 

 I’ll post it after. Already have my intro. “Hello. My name is Bastatrds. Bunny Bastatrds.”. Like James Bond. Can’t fawking wait. Thanks brother.

[Bier Meister 1,750]

Don’t mention Edie brickel 

[frank 2,347]

59 minutes ago, Bier Meister said:

Don’t mention Edie brickel 

That’s the worst advice I’ve ever heard. 

[BeenHereBefore 1,587]

Very awesome and trust your gut and what you think is funny.

[kutulu 1,707]

I bet you can stand up at least a few times a month 

[MikeMatt 377]

4 minutes ago, kutulu said:

I bet you can stand up at least a few times a month 

Doubtful 

[BunnysBastatrds 2,606]

6 minutes ago, kutulu said:

I bet you can stand up at least a few times a month 

 It’s my menstrual cycle days when I’m good.

[kutulu 1,707]

Gotta have faith

[BunnysBastatrds 2,606]

14 hours ago, kutulu said:

Gotta have faith

 I don’t have a great ass like Michael 

[MikeMatt 377]

11 minutes ago, BunnysBastatrds said:

 I don’t have a great ass like Michael 

Oh Thank you for the compliment. 
 

[BunnysBastatrds 2,606]

4 minutes ago, MikeMatt said:

Oh Thank you for the compliment. 
 

 Im very fond of your turd cutter

[MikeMatt 377]

6 minutes ago, BunnysBastatrds said:

 Im very fond of your turd cutter

[Mike Honcho 5,439]

Congratulations...I mean most of us learned to do "stand-up" by the age of 3, but good for you!

[BunnysBastatrds 2,606]

 Looks like Im getting in, in late December. I did a FaceTime with the manager and she said definitely. Now Im trying to figure out how much to consume

[BiffTannen 1,127]

5 minutes ago, BunnysBastatrds said:

 Looks like Im getting in, in late December. I did a FaceTime with the manager and she said definitely. Now Im trying to figure out how much to consume

What's the place called? I watch a guy online from your area. He used to be a car salesman now he does standup and makes money making instagram videos. I guess he went to an open mic night and was a hit. 

[BunnysBastatrds 2,606]

32 minutes ago, BiffTannen said:

What's the place called? I watch a guy online from your area. He used to be a car salesman now he does standup and makes money making instagram videos. I guess he went to an open mic night and was a hit. 

 https://504comedy.com/data/cache/b8e715f2a8ac143eba22753a9dc0bc63.jpg

 

 if I do well, I might get a chance at Sharks, or bigger, Carrollton Station.
 

 

 

[Fnord 2,524]

Good luck Bunny! I've got a buddy that's been doing standup for years. He always told me it's fine to go on if you are half drunk and half stoned. Just don't forget the material. My guess is you have the tolerance to handle it.

[5-Points 3,766]

Work on your timing. Even if the punchline isn't that funny, you can get some laughs if the timing is right. 

 

 

[5-Points 3,766]

Geek Meat at Uncle Matt's in late December? 

 

[frank 2,347]

We should all write jokes. Bunny can use any or all that meet his high standards. 

[cmh6476 1,129]

4 hours ago, BunnysBastatrds said:

 Looks like Im getting in, in late December. I did a FaceTime with the manager and she said definitely. Now Im trying to figure out how much to consume

Enough to get comfortable, not so much that it impacts your ability to remember your bit and deliver. 

[frank 2,347]

I always thought any good comedian should be able to deal with hecklers. They are drunk and you can be prepared. Have at least three generic put downs that will work on anyone ready to go if necessary. 

[BunnysBastatrds 2,606]

1 hour ago, frank said:

I always thought any good comedian should be able to deal with hecklers. They are drunk and you can be prepared. Have at least three generic put downs that will work on anyone ready to go if necessary. 

 Ive got a dozen plus…

 “Shut up stoopid. I fawked yer mom. She raised the afterbirth and here you are!”

  “I might skull fawk you. I might”

 “You have the stinky box look. Is it true?”

 “When are you due?”

… and many more. All suggestions are welcome. Ive been watching so many standup to prepare.. Redd Fox, Buddy Hackett, Pryor, Patrice, Murphy, C Rock, Danngerfield, Leno, and all the past and present Comedy Roasts. Jeff Ross, and all the rest. I feel like I’m ready and loaded. 

 

[BunnysBastatrds 2,606]

 “Do you pay extra for the two seats you take up?”

[cmh6476 1,129]

"Good evening, it's great to be here.   I almost didn't make it.....I joined the amateur autopsy club earlier this year, and tonight's open Mike night."

 

 

 

[MikeMatt 377]

After a continuous heckler …. “ Hey man I dont show up at your work and slap the d1ck at of your mouth when yiur doing your job”. 
 

 

[MDC 7,897]

 

[MikeMatt 377]

Spoken in Jerry Seinfeld tone.

So you hear about this Geek Club ? Yeah theres this website on a low rent FF bored and it’s called The Geek Club - yeah The Geek Club. Well if you check it out the history you’ll see …….. They weren't really GEEKS ! No - Not Geeks !

Then there was an invasion of political outcasts from another FF website - let me tell you - i can do an hour on that place alone - but the outcasts joined The Geek Club and you know what ? The place is now full of Geeks ! Yup.  Geeks I tell ya. Geeks. And thats all I have to say about that.

 

[BunnysBastatrds 2,606]

 I’ll definitely bring us up for sure. It’ll be recorded and posted on YouTube.

 I think I’m going with stories and self deprecating jokes as well, Im comfortable there. I’m writing new material for breaking my cherry.

[SUXBNME 1,596]

Tell them about the time your dik "accidently" fell into your dobie 

[cmh6476 1,129]

Tell them about the time your friend from Kansas city was visiting but you tripped over your dog and couldn't make it. 

[MikeMatt 377]

3 hours ago, cmh6476 said:

Tell them about the time your friend from Kansas city was visiting but you tripped over your dog and couldn't make it. 

Is that when his dikc ended up in his dog as Sux alludes to above ?