AAAAAARRRGGGGGGHHH!

[davebg 0]

I come home and I'm listening to how her day went and she slips in that she got into a little "fender bender" today. About $750 to the car...no idea what she did to the one she hit.

 

This has become a dangerous, expensive, recurring problem.

 

Normally I try not to get too riled up about it and try to discuss it with her calmly...like adults.

 

My reaction this time?

 

DaveBG: W-W-WHA-What happened? You're obviously OK, right?..........How does this keep happeneing? You've had this car two and a half years...this is what? Your fourth or fifth trip to the body shop?

 

Mrs. DaveBG: He was parked illegally when I was leaving the doctor. (editor note: just a routine visit...nothing to see here) But I took care of everything already. I got a police report, called the insurance company and got an estimate.

 

DaveBG: Wait? You pulled out and hit a parked car? You walked out of the office to your car, there was a car parked behind you and you just pulled out and clipped it?

 

Mrs. DaveBG: You know this is a problem for me...

 

DaveBG:

 

MAXIMUM

 

I left and went to the gym.

[DanXIII 8]

Do you guys have kids? Is divorce a viable option?

[hdaddy 18]

women can't drive fer sh!t

[GettnHuge 2]

I left and went to the gym.

 

this is the only problem I see, you didn't beat her.

[jerryskids 6,594]

Maybe she was preoccupied trying to remember what kind of sausage to buy?

[Mephisto 15]

Take the car away from her. Then, spend the next marital counseling session berating her about it, how everything is her fault, and her mother is crazy. It's worked before for you.

[kutulu 1,660]

Try to see the glass as half full...this is a perfect time for the Grudge Fock.

[mobb_deep 920]

Your unhappiness makes me feel so fortunate to not be married. God am I glad I'm not you

[Electric Mayhem 35]

Your unhappiness makes me feel so fortunate to not be married. God am I glad I'm not you

 

All I can think of when I hear trainwreck marriage/girfriend stories is

 

Single > Bad relationship

[Riddlen 1]

I love being married. After reading your posts on a regular basis I cant imagine why you have marital problems

[MDC 7,164]

You should beat her with an electrical cord.

 

It's the only way.

[Blitzen 0]

I see this as a perfect opportunity for you:

 

Now that she's established a propensity for wrecks, arrange for a brake failure on the car when she plans an outing. Nobody will suspect it was foul play.

[texasmouth 1]

Well, could be worse, she could be cheating on him like some one else's wife on this bored......

[davebg 0]

Oh...don't think that was the only doozy she dropped on me last night.

 

With me working as a freelance/contractor now I am supposed to go on her medical insurance. I asked her to look into it and let me know what's what. She told me that her HR dept wanted a letter from my new employer stating that I was not eligible for medical benefits. So, I got the letter from HR this week (this was my first week) and gave it to Mrs. DaveBG.

 

So, she went to HR. Now she tells me that HR almost didn't accept the letter b/c it didn't state what my relationship to Mrs. DaveBG was.

 

DaveBG: Um... ...that's not what you told me they asked for in the letter. Why would a letter from my employer discuss my relationship to you...a person they don't know?

 

Mrs. DaveBG: Well, I got them to accept it anyway after I told them you were my husband. They're sending me the paperwork again b/c I lost the first set they gave me a couple of weeks ago.

 

DaveBG: So, I won't be on your plan for the month of Sept? So, I have to sign up for COBRA for a month b/c we didn't get the paperwork that you lost filled out in time?

 

Then, this morning, she calls me.

 

Mrs. DaveBG: I accidentally took your mobile/PDA this morning instead of mine. WHOOPS...TEE HEE

 

DaveBG: GREEEEAT. It's not like I use it to track my focking hours as a consultant and need to submit my time for the week today! Good thing there's a desktop interface I can get to. Next time, since we both have the same model, maybe you could take the 1.3 seconds to turn it on and check to see if you have the right one before you take it?

[Toro 1]

DaveBG: So, I won't be on your plan for the month of Sept? So, I have to sign up for COBRA for a month b/c we didn't get the paperwork that you lost filled out in time?

 

You don't have to send in your COBRA premium unless you need it. There is a date cutoff for when the paperwork can be filed. Almost every job I have ever switched didn't even send the COBRA paperwork until 3 or 5 weeks after I left.

[porkbutt 892]

rip off her peg leg and ram it up her a$$

 

HARRRRRRRRRRR!

[davebg 0]

You don't have to send in your COBRA premium unless you need it. There is a date cutoff for when the paperwork can be filed. Almost every job I have ever switched didn't even send the COBRA paperwork until 3 or 5 weeks after I left.

I know, but I have asthma...and it's usually at it's worst when the seasons change. I can't go off of my maint drugs...esp this time of year. Since Mrs. DaveBG gave me no indication that there would be a problem getting on her insurance on time, I didn't stock up for the duration.

[kutulu 1,660]

I know, but I have asthma...and it's usually at it's worst when the seasons change. I can't go off of my maint drugs...esp this time of year. Since Mrs. DaveBG gave me no indication that there would be a problem getting on her insurance on time, I didn't stock up for the duration.

 

She's trying to kill you.

[supermike80 1,822]

Dood..I just can't get on your side completely with this sheet--sounds like she can make NO MISTAKES..without you getting all up her azz.

 

Either way, you sound pathetically miserable, b!tchy, unhappy and want perfection in your wife. She cannot give it to you(who the fock could).

 

Get out now. Give HER the chance to find a man that can handle a mistake (or 10) by the woman they love and realize life is just too g0ddamn short to make a big deal out of little stuff.

[Toro 1]

I know, but I have asthma...and it's usually at it's worst when the seasons change. I can't go off of my maint drugs...esp this time of year. Since Mrs. DaveBG gave me no indication that there would be a problem getting on her insurance on time, I didn't stock up for the duration.

 

Sounds like you should have made this a bigger priority then.

 

Never trust anyone to take care of your needs and you'll never be disappointed in anyone but yourself.

[bammbamm 0]

after reading this i should really quit b!tching about my problems with pebbles. its quite normal compared to this.

[davebg 0]

Dood..I just can't get on your side completely with this sheet--sounds like she can make NO MISTAKES..without you getting all up her azz.

 

Either way, you sound pathetically miserable, b!tchy, unhappy and want perfection in your wife. She cannot give it to you(who the fock could).

 

Get out now. Give HER the chance to find a man that can handle a mistake (or 10) by the woman they love and realize life is just too g0ddamn short to make a big deal out of little stuff.

I don't expect perfection. I'm no prince myself.

 

But when it's the same careless crap over and over and over again it makes me feel as if she's not even trying.

 

I mean, her biggest gripe w/me has always been the pot smoking. So, I said fine, while I'm not ready to quit entirely yet, I'll start by going 30 days w/out...cold turkey. (That may not seem like much, but when you've been smoking almost every day for almost 15 years, it is not easy.)

 

I'd just like to see the same type of effort on her part w/the stuff that drives me crazy.

 

Is that really too much to ask for in one's spouse? The person who's supposed to be my best friend and partner in life? The person to constantly professes her love to me?

 

Like they say, actions speak louder than words.

 

Sounds like you should have made this a bigger priority then.

 

Never trust anyone to take care of your needs and you'll never be disappointed in anyone but yourself.

I'm sorry, but I couldn't disagree more. This wasn't a buddy of mine letting me down when I needed a hand moving some heavy crap...this is my wife.

 

When we first started counseling one of the things that the doc said was that we needed to determine whether or not we thought we made a good team together.

 

Well, right about now I feel less like I've got a teammate and more like I've got a semi-retarded watergirl cheering me on from the sidelines.

[Chronic Husker 85]

I think SUXBNME should have to give up his handle to dave.

[Strike 5,261]

I don't expect perfection. I'm no prince myself.

 

But when it's the same careless crap over and over and over again it makes me feel as if she's not even trying.

 

I mean, her biggest gripe w/me has always been the pot smoking. So, I said fine, while I'm not ready to quit entirely yet, I'll start by going 30 days w/out...cold turkey. (That may not seem like much, but when you've been smoking almost every day for almost 15 years, it is not easy.)

 

I'd just like to see the same type of effort on her part w/the stuff that drives me crazy.

 

So if she goes cold turkey for 30 days and doesn't have an accident that will make it all ok for you?

[Toro 1]

I'm sorry, but I couldn't disagree more. This wasn't a buddy of mine letting me down when I needed a hand moving some heavy crap...this is my wife.

 

I don't give a crap who it is. It's your responsibility to look after your health. You can offload your responsibility onto others in the name of marriage, but when it comes down to it, the job didn't get done. And who's fault is that? Yours.

 

And we are not talking about picking up the dry cleaning, we are talking about some serious health issues. If you are stupid enough to trust another human being with your health, especially one with a track record such as hers, it's your own damn fault.

 

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice....well, I ain't gonna get fooled again.

[davebg 0]

I don't give a crap who it is. It's your responsibility to look after your health. You can offload your responsibility onto others in the name of marriage, but when it comes down to it, the job didn't get done. And who's fault is that? Yours.

 

And we are not talking about picking up the dry cleaning, we are talking about some serious health issues. If you are stupid enough to trust another human being with your health, especially one with a track record such as hers, it's your own damn fault.

 

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice....well, I ain't gonna get fooled again.

So, you think that I should have contacted Mrs. DaveBG's HR department and tried to convince them to talk to me about personnel issues...even though they have no focking clue who I am b/c I don't work there?

 

Oh yeah...I'm sure that would have worked.

[Toro 1]

So, you think that I should have contacted Mrs. DaveBG's HR department and tried to convince them to talk to me about personnel issues...even though they have no focking clue who I am b/c I don't work there?

 

Oh yeah...I'm sure that would have worked.

 

I would have been on her ass every freaking day - calling her several times at work on a daily basis - until it got done.

[davebg 0]

I would have been on her ass every freaking day - calling her several times at work on a daily basis - until it got done.

While I can't really call her at work (she's in a differnet school every day, except for when she goes into the office on Thursdays...and even then she usually can't chat b/c she's leading seminars), yeah, I guess I could have nagged her about it every night when she got home.

 

Not really the "solution" I'm looking for, but...

[bammbamm 0]

maybe you should spend some of your cash on classes at the local driving instructional school instead of on weed.

[Toro 1]

While I can't really call her at work (she's in a differnet school every day, except for when she goes into the office on Thursdays...and even then she usually can't chat b/c she's leading seminars), yeah, I guess I could have nagged her about it every night when she got home.

 

Not really the "solution" I'm looking for, but...

 

Sounds like the solution you are looking for is a divorce and you are just waiting for her to REALLY fock up.

[davebg 0]

maybe you should spend some of your cash on classes at the local driving instructional school instead of on weed.

To do what? Teach her to notice the car parked behind her before she pulls out of a parking spot!?!

[FutbolJugador 0]

it could be worse... she could be unemployed and spending your money on health and beauty products to the tune of $10,000.

 

True story.

 

And I'm with EM, it's when I hear stories like these that I am SO glad I'm still single.

[Dixie Chicken 0]

I mean, her biggest gripe w/me has always been the pot smoking. So, I said fine, while I'm not ready to quit entirely yet, I'll start by going 30 days w/out...cold turkey. (That may not seem like much, but when you've been smoking almost every day for almost 15 years, it is not easy.)

 

 

Starting spending every dime you make on hookers and blow. After a few months of using her entire salary to pay bills, buy groceries, etc and not sleeping because you keep her up all night with your coke benders, she will be begging you to start smoking pot again. Problem solved, everyone is happy

 

(dance banana man dance)

[wiffleball 4,788]

Is it just me, or does this seem like some sort of elaborate hoax? has anybody ever SEEN Mrs. Davebg? I bet Davebg isn't even married. In fact, I bet Davebg isn't even his real name.

[FutbolJugador 0]

Wait... you have asthma and smoke pot. Doesn't the smoking irritate the asthma? Because I can't be around smoke at all without having an asthma attack. Smoking makes it even worse.

[davebg 0]

Is it just me, or does this seem like some sort of elaborate hoax? has anybody ever SEEN Mrs. Davebg? I bet Davebg isn't even married. In fact, I bet Davebg isn't even his real name.

Thank you...I needed a

 

Wait... you have asthma and smoke pot. Doesn't the smoking irritate the asthma? Because I can't be around smoke at all without having an asthma attack. Smoking makes it even worse.

While I'm sure it doesn't help, it doesn't really "set-off" my asthma either. My asthma is more tied to allergies and drastic changes to the weather than anything else, I guess. My asthma's pretty well controlled...hence me not wanting to go off my maint meds.

[wiffleball 4,788]

Mrs. DaveBG: You know this is a problem for me...

 

[Chronic Husker 85]

To do what? Teach her to notice the car parked behind her before she pulls out of a parking spot!?!

You've gotta start somewhere.

[TheNewGirl 1,377]

Thank you...I needed a

While I'm sure it doesn't help, it doesn't really "set-off" my asthma either. My asthma is more tied to allergies and drastic changes to the weather than anything else, I guess. My asthma's pretty well controlled...hence me not wanting to go off my maint meds.

 

Perhaps you wouldn't need maint. meds if you stopped filling your lungs with pot smoke?

 

Just a thought.

[davebg 0]

Perhaps you wouldn't need maint. meds if you stopped filling your lungs with pot smoke?

 

Just a thought.

Perhaps...although, I had the asthma way before I ever started smoking. Unfortunately, we may never find out, as I do not plan to go off my meds.