Ok can i get a ruling on this?

[cyclone24 1,814]

Ok the SO and i work in the same building. (shut up...i know)

 

So i go outside to read my book, eat lunch, etc at some outside tables. So about 30 minutes in this blond i work with comes out and says, "Mind if i sit with you?" "Of course". Cute girl..but since i know you jackals like this info..B Cup. But yes...you would hit it.

 

Now the SO goes and works out over her lunch in a building between us....so i know shes coming out any second and the appearance will be me and some blond im not hitting on and have barely spoken to work wise....are having lunch together.

 

So about a second after i say "of course"...i say "but my lunch is about over..so i was about to leave" She says oh thats ok.

 

Anyway...the whole scenario made me feel like i was doing something wrong..then i thought...well wait....i wasnt.

 

Would you have just sat there and told the SO who she was when she came out, etc.....or would you get up and say your lunch was over? (And no....'Id go hit it' is not an option)

 

I think i just wanted to avoid playing 20 questions later.

[Patriotsfatboy1 1,432]

Yes, it is official. You are a hom0.

[The Moz 69]

hard to answer a person that welches

[cbfalcon 824]

The answer is you shouldn't work in true same building as your SO.

 

HTH

[cyclone24 1,814]

Yes, it is official. You are a hom0.

 

 

It wasnt before?

[Drizzay 646]

Since when did they get patio seating at McDonalds?

[RLLD 3,455]

Simple really. Women are intensely insecure. if you are seen near another female, particularly one that might be considered a threat, you fall under immediate suspicion.

[The Moz 69]

It wasnt before?

 

since most gheys welch I guess it makes sense

[TheNewGirl 1,031]

Why did you feel guilty, because that seems like the emotion that you most likely had going on there, especially if you said that you wouldn't hit and blah blah blah (me thinks you doth protest too much).

 

Is your SO insecure in that she'd give you the 3rd degree when all you were doing was talking to some chick you work with?

 

If you're going to get the 3rd degree when SO comes out of the building, then I say that your move was right if you aren't interested in getting into an argument with your SO. If you TRULY weren't doing anything wrong, then I say sit there, wait for SO, introduce them and move on, even if it means that SO will be insecure and ask a ton of questions.

 

Also, get a new job where you and SO aren't in the same building.

[NewbieJr 540]

You did the right thing. The last thing you want to do is raise the SO's suspicions and make things uncomfortable at work. Even though you were 100%, it would have looked like you two were having lunch together. You avoided a fight. That's never a bad thing.

[Patriotsfatboy1 1,432]

You did the right thing. The last thing you want to do is raise the SO's suspicions and make things uncomfortable at work. Even though you were 100%, it would have looked like you two were having lunch together. You avoided a fight. That's never a bad thing.

 

Says the guy who gets p!ssed on by wimmen.

[frank 2,149]

Since when did they get patio seating at McDonalds?

 

I see this has caught on. See guys, what he did here was suggest that cyclone works at McDonald's. Funny, because most people don't want to work there.

[Jeff Garcia 8]

I see this has caught on. See guys, what he did here was suggest that cyclone works at McDonald's. Funny, because most people don't want to work there.

[Kannabel 0]

Your wife's coworker friends have already told her all about your little lunch with the blond. You should have just waited to introduce your wife to her. Now she has all afternoon to make up reasons why you had lunch with some chick. You are going to wish you had hit it instead of denying what she thinks is truth all night.

 

Have fun later!

[TD Ryan2 314]

I see this has caught on. See guys, what he did here was suggest that cyclone works at McDonald's. Funny, because most people don't want to work there.

[cyclone24 1,814]

Your wife's coworker friends have already told her all about your little lunch with the blond. You should have just waited to introduce your wife to her. Now she has all afternoon to make up reasons why you had lunch with some chick. You are going to wish you had hit it instead of denying what she thinks is truth all night.

 

Have fun later!

 

 

Hah jesus....relax. I was actually in a sit down spot with her for all of...maybe 45 seconds before i gathered my things and got up.

[jerryskids 5,212]

When you say "work with," do you mean that you actually work with her, or she is just in the same company? If you work with her, I don't see the harm in chatting with a coworker at lunch. Just be sure to be on the lookout for the SO, and wave her over to introduce her, so it doesn't look like you are doing anything wrong. As a bonus, you get a little hand with the SO, because a small part of her knows you work with hot chicks.

 

If it is just some chick from the same company, you probably did the best thing.

[The Elevator Killer 497]

Hah jesus....relax. I was actually in a sit down spot with her for all of...maybe 45 seconds before i gathered my things and got up.

 

Premature ejaculation?

[nikki2200 4]

I think it's a little weird that you would get nervous about being "caught" by your SO eating lunch with one of your co-workers. If I was having lunch with my male co-workers and SO walked in and saw me, my reaction would be to wave for him to come over and join us. Not "Oh ###### I'm busted."

 

I'm not sure what your reaction to this situation means, but it means something.

[RLLD 3,455]

Hah jesus....relax. I was actually in a sit down spot with her for all of...maybe 45 seconds before i gathered my things and got up.

 

Does not matter. If she stopped to speak to you, even briefly, the wife is going to want to know what about, and from where you know her, and how often you two speak...yadda yadda....

 

So not worth it. Always avoid it if you can, you did the right thing. hell, you could be reading a sign or something, if a hottie walks in between you and the sign you have some answering to do....

 

[TimmySmith 2,782]

I'm not sure what your reaction to this situation means, but it means something.

It means he does not want a rash of sh1t and is smart enough to avoid it.

[cyclone24 1,814]

I think it's a little weird that you would get nervous about being "caught" by your SO eating lunch with one of your co-workers. If I was having lunch with my male co-workers and SO walked in and saw me, my reaction would be to wave for him to come over and join us. Not "Oh ###### I'm busted."

 

I'm not sure what your reaction to this situation means, but it means something.

 

 

Not so much that as the SO is a bit of a hot head.....

 

We work at the same company....same building....different floors. (Insert Mcdonalds has floors? bit)

[cyclone24 1,814]

Premature ejaculation?

 

Im pretty sure you won this thread.

[RLLD 3,455]

I think it's a little weird that you would get nervous about being "caught" by your SO eating lunch with one of your co-workers. If I was having lunch with my male co-workers and SO walked in and saw me, my reaction would be to wave for him to come over and join us. Not "Oh ###### I'm busted."

 

I'm not sure what your reaction to this situation means, but it means something.

 

It means his SO is a very normal female....

[TD Ryan2 314]

why you's pretending that only women are like this?

 

Ray, you go outside and some CEO-Ken-Doll that you don't know is sitting and chatting it up with your wife, you may or may not be threatened by it, but you surely won't like it - this doesn't appear in the "positive things that happened today" column.

What's your play at that point? I'd imagine you go over and introduce yourself - you definately size him up and either it's, "I'd crush this pansie" or "he's pretty fockin' big, but I'll just brain him when he's not looking".

 

Listen - all smartassery aside - when Mrs. TD and I were first dating and not quite sure where we stood with one another - we were out for drinks and I explained "what I think we are" to her like this:

"If I walked in here with my buddies right now and you were at a table for 2 having drinks with some guy, it would bother me. I assume the same would be true for you if the roles were reversed. So, I guess that's a pretty good indicator of, 'where we stand' with eachother.

[NewbieJr 540]

Says the guy who gets p!ssed on by wimmen.

What does your vanilla, boring sex life have to do with Cyclone's decision?

[cyclone24 1,814]

What does your vanilla, boring sex life have to do with Cyclone's decision?

 

 

If peeing on me is cool...consider me Miles Davis.

[The Elevator Killer 497]

Im pretty sure you won this thread.

 

 

[RLLD 3,455]

why you's pretending that only women are like this?

 

Ray, you go outside and some CEO-Ken-Doll that you don't know is sitting and chatting it up with your wife, you may or may not be threatened by it, but you surely won't like it - this doesn't appear in the "positive things that happened today" column.

What's your play at that point? I'd imagine you go over and introduce yourself - you definately size him up and either it's, "I'd crush this pansie" or "he's pretty fockin' big, but I'll just brain him when he's not looking".

 

Listen - all smartassery aside - when Mrs. TD and I were first dating and not quite sure where we stood with one another - we were out for drinks and I explained "what I think we are" to her like this:

"If I walked in here with my buddies right now and you were at a table for 2 having drinks with some guy, it would bother me. I assume the same would be true for you if the roles were reversed. So, I guess that's a pretty good indicator of, 'where we stand' with eachother.

 

I trust her, if I do not trust her then I have a much bigger problem.

 

She can speak to whomever she wants to, she is an adult.

 

I would think that not affording her the same respect I would want for myself.

 

nah, I have no problems with my SO speaking to other men any more than if she were speaking to other women; in fact I would warmly welcome her to get a little friendly with another woman.

 

[NewbieJr 540]

If peeing on me is cool...consider me Miles Davis.

This guy gets it.

[nikki2200 4]

I think you guys may be taking your paranoia and cliched women are pains in the asses to a bit of an extreme. Are you seriously telling me that sitting at a table eating lunch with a co-worker who is of the opposite sex should lead to a fight? That is absurd. What about meetings? Do you have to tell your boss you are not allowed to go to a meeting if there are going to be any attractive women there because your SO might get jealous?

 

Maybe some women are overly jealous like that, as are some jealous/controlling/possessive men, but this story sounds ridiculous to me. I dated someone I worked with for 5 years. And I'm sure I saw him at a table eating lunch with an attractive female co-worker a few hundred times. And I'm sure I never even blinked or thought there was a problem with that. Maybe if I opened a broom closet and saw them focking... But sitting down at a lunch table together? C'mon.

[NewbieJr 540]

I think you guys may be taking your paranoia and cliched women are pains in the asses to a bit of an extreme. Are you seriously telling me that sitting at a table eating lunch with a co-worker who is of the opposite sex should lead to a fight? That is absurd. What about meetings? Do you have to tell your boss you are not allowed to go to a meeting if there are going to be any attractive women there because your SO might get jealous?

 

Maybe some women are overly jealous like that, as are some jealous/controlling/possessive men, but this story sounds ridiculous to me. I dated someone I worked with for 5 years. And I'm sure I saw him at a table eating lunch with an attractive female co-worker a few hundred times. And I'm sure I never even blinked or thought there was a problem with that. Maybe if I opened a broom closet and saw them focking... But sitting down at a lunch table together? C'mon.

Those two people focking in the broom closet, sat and had lunch a few months ago and started getting to know each other.

[cyclone24 1,814]

Those two people focking in the broom closet, sat and had lunch a few months ago and started getting to know each other.

 

 

This guy gets it.

[TD Ryan2 314]

Those two people focking in the broom closet, sat and had lunch a few months ago and started getting to know each other.

that's always the start of it.

 

I don't work closely with any females - I suppose if I did, if I was on a project with a woman or something, maybe it would be different. I go to lunch with people in my department or by myself.

Maybe that would be differnt if there was a female that worked with me/us?

But in general, when I see "Joe" from the stockroom going to lunch with "Mary" from accounting - it's no good - they're not just "pals" - maybe they're not actually cheating on a spouse, but I guarantee they're b!tching about their spouses and sharing in their commonality of dyusfunction. I guarantee they wouldn't want their spouses to know what they do/say together at lunch.

 

We had a guy here that went to luch with the same girl 2x to 3x a week. They would both play it off as, "what, we're just friends" and nobody really knew if anything was going on. Sure enough, she gets fired and is claiming it's the worst day of her life b/c she was fired and lost her boyfriend in the same day (he told her he couln't see her anymore b/c there was no way to justify it now that they didn't work together).

[nikki2200 4]

Where in the fock do you people work that it is not completely normal for men and women to interact with each other in a normal work social setting such as the cafeteria, and if they do that means they are focking?

 

Dear God....

 

Also Newbie, you made me laugh.

[TD Ryan2 314]

Where in the fock do you people work that it is not completely normal for men and women to interact with each other in a normal work social setting such as the cafeteria, and if they do that means they are focking?

who said anything about a cafeteria?

I'm talking about going out to lunch together - going to a restaurant, sitting down at a table, booth, or bar together, and having lunch - or in cyclone's case, going out to the park to take a walk together and have a picnic.

And if it is in the cafeteria and you two regularly get your own table and just sit together whispering in the corner instead of interacting with everyone in the cafe, then you're probably focking or want to fock one another.

[TheNewGirl 1,031]

it almost always starts off as casual lunches.

 

About 10 years ago, i worked in an environment that was 99% men. I made some friends (seriously, never dated any of them) but there were flirtatious moments, etc. There is one guy that after 10 years, is still at the same company/same building. We are FB friends, he stops by my desk and chats me a up sometimes.

 

About two months ago, he invited me to lunch. Just can't go there. I enjoy just seeing him in the hall way, or him coming by my desk for a quick 10 or 20 minute chat, but anything more than that is just trouble, IMO.

 

Not what cyclone was asking...but still.

 

At any rate, if your SO tends to be a bit of a hot head, you probably did right by leaving the table.

[RLLD 3,455]

that's always the start of it.

 

I don't work closely with any females - I suppose if I did, if I was on a project with a woman or something, maybe it would be different. I go to lunch with people in my department or by myself.

Maybe that would be differnt if there was a female that worked with me/us?

But in general, when I see "Joe" from the stockroom going to lunch with "Mary" from accounting - it's no good - they're not just "pals" - maybe they're not actually cheating on a spouse, but I guarantee they're b!tching about their spouses and sharing in their commonality of dyusfunction. I guarantee they wouldn't want their spouses to know what they do/say together at lunch.

 

We had a guy here that went to luch with the same girl 2x to 3x a week. They would both play it off as, "what, we're just friends" and nobody really knew if anything was going on. Sure enough, she gets fired and is claiming it's the worst day of her life b/c she was fired and lost her boyfriend in the same day (he told her he couln't see her anymore b/c there was no way to justify it now that they didn't work together).

 

 

Truth.

 

If either spouse starts bad mouthing the other to some other person not of their own gender, its a slippery slope from there. Either you are into your SO or you are not, and if you are not, just call the thing off.

 

Still, women will remain insecure and spiteful, best to be overly protective of your own arse where ever possible. Who needs extra drama? Isn't there enough real stuff to worry about in life without adding stupid insecurities from your wife?

[jerryskids 5,212]

About 9 months after moving here I started meeting a girl for breakfast in our cafeteria. We were in a group of recent graduates who had started together and were all friends, in fact I had dated her roommate earlier. We were on a rotation program and both rotated through the same facility. Just friends, nice and platonic.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Our 19th wedding anniversary is next month.

[KSB2424 3,083]

I'm leaning on the side that you did the right thing cyclone. While it would've been nothing, you avoided any mispresentaion that could have been seen. Sitting outside, eating lunch, chatting it up with a cute blonde? Not a good look for a married guy or a guy in a serious relationship.

 

Keep it simple. Avoid confrontation. Life is hard enough as it is, no need to make it more complicated than it has to be.