OldMaid 1,838 Posted December 5, 2012 So asking for a pearl neklace for Christmas would be out of the question? I could ask... but I bet I would get the Cartier version. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BunnysBastatrds 1,916 Posted December 5, 2012 I could ask... but I bet I would get the Cartier version. That sounds painful. He must have a really big uretha. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
IGotWorms 3,315 Posted December 5, 2012 We don't. I'm not a big 'pron' guy in the first place. Despite my sweater vest collection I love me some wimmins, and while I enjoy the occaisional pron and nudity I simply don't seek it out all that much. Pron is like a nice cigar, its good every once in a while in small amounts to get the juices flowing but thats about it. Some of you dudes are chain smokers which is bad for you. She's never really brought it up either. The wife isn't shy at all (sexually) and loved reading those 50 Shades of Grey books and tells dirty jokes etc, but isn't into pron either. Women don't tend to be as turned on by visual depictions of sex. They're more into the mental/emotional aspect, why is why they love 50 Shades of Grey, etc. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patriotsfatboy1 1,432 Posted December 5, 2012 Women don't tend to be as turned on by visual depictions of sex. They're more into the mental/emotional aspect, why is why they love 50 Shades of Grey, etc. How about she reads erotic stories and you watch porn? After 15 minutes or so, she is giving up the rosebud. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
IGotWorms 3,315 Posted December 5, 2012 How about she reads erotic stories and you watch porn? After 15 minutes or so, she is giving up the rosebud. I like this idea. Maybe they could invent some Nook/iPad hybrid that could display 50 Shades of Grey and hardcore ATM porn side by side. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patriotsfatboy1 1,432 Posted December 5, 2012 I like this idea. Maybe they could invent some Nook/iPad hybrid that could display 50 Shades of Grey and hardcore ATM porn side by side. You cheap fock. She has an iPad showing her pron stories (there are apps out there). You have your TV showing pron or you can have your own iPad. Why split a screen when a tablet is not that expensive? After about 15 minutes, have her turn on her side to read. You start rubbing her butt and thighs a little. Get out some lube and work in a finger into the starfish. After about 10 minutes, she is begging you to take her anal cherry. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
IGotWorms 3,315 Posted December 5, 2012 You cheap fock. She has an iPad showing her pron stories (there are apps out there). You have your TV showing pron or you can have your own iPad. Why split a screen when a tablet is not that expensive? After about 15 minutes, have her turn on her side to read. You start rubbing her butt and thighs a little. Get out some lube and work in a finger into the starfish. After about 10 minutes, she is begging you to take her anal cherry. Not cheap, just thought it'd be nice if you could share the experience more by viewing your respective content together on the same device. I guess I'm just a hopeless romantic. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SUXBNME 1,335 Posted December 5, 2012 Women don't tend to be as turned on by visual depictions of sex. They're more into the mental/emotional aspect, why is why they love 50 Shades of Grey, etc. Learn that in lawyer school, did ya? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
IGotWorms 3,315 Posted December 5, 2012 Learn that in lawyer school, did ya? I mostly learned that at the school for talking out if your ass. And I was a psych major in undergrad, which is pretty much the same thing. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
phillybear 364 Posted December 6, 2012 The reason I ask is that last night was the first time we watched it together. We've talked about it for months. So you finally showed chicken lady the film of the horse focking you in the ass and perforating your colon. Is she going to help push the horse next time? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
titans&bucs&bearsohmy! 2,745 Posted December 6, 2012 I did back in the day with a long ago Gf. It really got her going. Shred at, why aren't you watching (I was watching her play with her poosay instead). I explained that, to me, she kind of negated the point. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Frozenbeernuts 1,652 Posted December 6, 2012 You don't know my BF... that would be a disaster. What kind of a phag are you dating? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
OldMaid 1,838 Posted December 6, 2012 What kind of a phag are you dating? The kind that is the exact polar opposite of myself. His idea of being adventurous is: leaving the lights on during sex. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Headslap75 0 Posted December 6, 2012 Ghey porn would probably go over better. and if this is the case perhaps he does know Newbie.....Just saying Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
5-Points 2,729 Posted December 6, 2012 To answer the OP: no. I mean, we've watched a few of those HBO shows about the bunny ranch and such, but not real hardcore porn. I think that would be weird, to watch it with my wife. She's actually pretty fun to watch pron with. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
IGotWorms 3,315 Posted December 6, 2012 She's actually pretty fun to watch pron with. But does she enthusiastically reenact even the dirtiest scenes, like your wife? I'm talking ATM, DP, double anal...the whole gamut. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
5-Points 2,729 Posted December 7, 2012 But does she enthusiastically reenact even the dirtiest scenes, like your wife? I'm talking ATM, DP, double anal...the whole gamut. Of course. I said she was fun, didn't I? I'll shoot some video for you next time. Once you see how much fun she has the weirdness should diminish considerably. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
IGotWorms 3,315 Posted December 7, 2012 Of course. I said she was fun, didn't I? I'll shoot some video for you next time. Once you see how much fun she has the weirdness should diminish considerably. How thoughtful of you. I'd offer to exchange videos with you, but if you want to see the filthy sh!t I've done with your wife you can just go to www.filthyshamelesswhores.com. No need for me to burn a DVD. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
5-Points 2,729 Posted December 7, 2012 How thoughtful of you. I'd offer to exchange videos with you, but if you want to see the filthy sh!t I've done with your wife you can just go to www.filthyshamelesswhores.com. No need for me to burn a DVD. Yeah, I've seen that site before. I especially enjoyed your Mom's barnyard series. She's a real trooper. In the opening scene of the first movie, when she was straddling the fence post, bouncing up and down, yelling "any c0ck'l do!" "any c0ck'l do!", I didn't think she meant the horse. I have that one saved to my favorites. When you see her at Christmas, can you get me an autographed photo? TIA Edit: Dammit! Just noticed Phillybear already used the horse bit. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SUXBNME 1,335 Posted December 7, 2012 The kind that is the exact polar opposite of myself. His idea of being adventurous is: leaving the lights on during sex. Having seen pics of you, that is pretty adventurous. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
OldMaid 1,838 Posted December 7, 2012 Having seen pics of you, that is pretty adventurous. Coming from you... that makes me chuckle. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
frank 2,145 Posted December 7, 2012 Nobutyoursdoespow! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SUXBNME 1,335 Posted December 7, 2012 Coming from you... that makes me chuckle. Say what you will, but you know I just won this thread Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JT 137 Posted December 7, 2012 Hell yeah! She likes some crazy sh!t. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SUXBNME 1,335 Posted December 7, 2012 Hell yeah! She likes some crazy sh!t. Veronica Moser type of crazy sh!t, or just your run of the mill crazy sh!t? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
OldMaid 1,838 Posted December 7, 2012 Say what you will, but you know I just won this thread If by winning this thread you mean: pretending that you think I'm unattractive and fat... Then, yes... you won this thread. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BunnysBastatrds 1,916 Posted December 7, 2012 The kind that is the exact polar opposite of myself. His idea of being adventurous is: leaving the lights on during sex. Motion sickness sucks. Put a piece of tape on his ear. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shotsup 832 Posted December 7, 2012 She's dating nikkis dad Obviously "she" is even if "she" won't admit it. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shotsup 832 Posted December 7, 2012 The kind that is the exact polar opposite of myself. His idea of being adventurous is: leaving the lights on during sex. You really need me to set you in the right direction. Did I just say erection ?? No but I was thinking it he's a phag - you need a real man. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
OldMaid 1,838 Posted December 7, 2012 You really need me to set you in the right direction. Did I just say erection ?? No but I was thinking it he's a phag - you need a real man. Meh... real men are overrated. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
titans&bucs&bearsohmy! 2,745 Posted December 8, 2012 Veronica Moser type of crazy sh!t, or just your run of the mill crazy sh!t? Thanks... I just googled Veronica moser! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MDC 5,891 Posted December 8, 2012 Thanks... I just googled Veronica moser! -1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MedStudent 56 Posted December 9, 2012 1354759075[/url]' post='4916928']The kind that is the exact polar opposite of myself. His idea of being adventurous is: leaving the lights on during sex. 1354843266[/url]' post='4917849']Having seen pics of you, that is pretty adventurous. 1354845063[/url]' post='4917887']Coming from you... that makes me chuckle. 1354848717[/url]' post='4917941']Say what you will, but you know I just won this thread 1354861647[/url]' post='4918074']If by winning this thread you mean: pretending that you think I'm unattractive and fat... Then, yes... you won this thread. These two are leading their goty bracket? They make an rp - newbie dustup look like the Lincoln-Douglas debates Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
OldMaid 1,838 Posted December 9, 2012 These two are leading their goty bracket? They make an rp - newbie dustup look like the Lincoln-Douglas debates In my defense... Have you ever tried to argue with Sux? It's kinda like trying to use a butter knife for surgery. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites