Funeral for a person who committed suicide

[jerryskids 6,795]

About to head to this.  Woman from our gym, in her 40s, a doctor.  She had body issues:  big fakies, lots of work done on her face.  We saw her the day before she killed herself at the gym, stretching on the side of class.  

The following day, Mother's Day, she killed herself.  She had a husband and an 11 year old son.  That poor kid is going to need therapy every year around Mother's Day.

You must be in a really bad mental place to do something so inconsiderate of the impact on those you love.   

We don't know her husband that well (nor did we know her that well), but we have a close-knit gym, and we subscribe to the "always go to the funeral" philosophy.

[5-Points 3,528]

She cared more about herself than she did her family. They're better off without her. 

 

[BeenHereBefore 1,520]

I posted on here a few years back and had two in two weeks.Close cousin like a brother and close childhood friend. Friend they had turn his casket around cause of gun shot wound,  Suicide is still hard to take when someone close to you does it.

[lickin_starfish 1,937]

I feel bad for anyone who is in such anguish that they feel this is their only relief.

[MDC 7,421]

3 minutes ago, lickin_starfish said:

I feel bad for anyone who is in such anguish that they feel this is their only relief.

This. Mental illness is a biich.

[MikeMatt 84]

Had a few over the years but the toughest one was close friend (mother died a few years earlier and dad was a cop) - on his 21st birthday in parents room shot himself with dads gun on mothers side of the bed. Sad. 

[Strike 5,539]

Neighbors daughter took her own life about 8 years ago.  About 18 years old (prob 32C if I had to guess you sickos!).  Heard it was over a guy.  I mean ,I get it.  We've all been teens who thought we found that one we couldn't live without but the feeling wasn't reciprocated.  But she was attractive and had her whole life ahead of her.  Why do that?  Still can't understand it.

[GutterBoy 2,899]

34 minutes ago, lickin_starfish said:

I feel bad for anyone who is in such anguish that they feel this is their only relief.

Thank you for this reply.  Was hoping we had some empathy left.

[weepaws 3,191]

Very selfish. Amen. 

Thanks. 

[lickin_starfish 1,937]

 

[edjr 6,583]

2 hours ago, MDC said:

This. Mental illness is a biich.

when are you going to pull the trigger?

[MDC 7,421]

1 minute ago, edjr said:

when are you going to pull the trigger?

Nice Ed.

[HellToupee 1,775]

About the big fakies , did they appear nice or could you tell they were obnoxious fakies? Fully clothed of course 

Edited May 25, 2024 by HellToupee
(.)(.)

[Alias Detective 1,400]

6 minutes ago, edjr said:

when are you going to pull the trigger?

[weepaws 3,191]

Couldn’t attend a funeral after someone selflessly took their own life.  Nope. 

Thanks. 

[EternalShinyAndChrome 4,101]

8 minutes ago, weepaws said:

Couldn’t attend a funeral after someone selflessly took their own life.  Nope. 

Thanks. 

Selflessly? 

Is English your first language?  What do they teach in Charlatan school?

[squistion 2,198]

2 hours ago, GutterBoy said:

Thank you for this reply.  Was hoping we had some empathy left.

Sadly, we haven't seen a whole lot from this crowd. SMH.

I think some here have been unduly harsh in their criticism of the suicide victim, but that is just my opinion.

We really don't know what was going through her mind or how rationally she was thinking at the time.

[cyclone24 1,913]

3 hours ago, MDC said:

This. Mental illness is a biich.

It’s not always mental illness, though. I mean, Bill Walton talks about being in crippling back pain to where he thought about it. I mean, if you’re just in chronic pain, I can completely see how someone might just have enough of it. 
 

Probably not in this case cause she was pretty young but definitely sad no matter what when they feel like that’s the best option. 

[jerryskids 6,795]

1 hour ago, HellToupee said:

About the big fakies , did they appear nice or could you tell they were obnoxious fakies? Fully clothed of course 

No, they were obnoxious.

They showed a montage of her pictures from birth until... maybe 3-5 years ago, based on the age of her son in the pics.  No recent ones, from when she had all of the face work done.  There was maybe one picture showing the new bewbs, but generally not.

What struck my wife and I was how many times different people mentioned her being "beautiful."  I know I'm playing psychologist on a low-rent FF message bored, but we both think she was chasing eternal youth with her recent surgeries, and Father Time always wins in the end.  I don't know if that is what led her to this tragic end, but perhaps she had too much of her image wrapped up in youthful beauty.

My advice is to tell the women/girls in your life that they are beautiful on the INSIDE.   

[jerryskids 6,795]

1 hour ago, weepaws said:

Couldn’t attend a funeral after someone selflessly took their own life.  Nope. 

Thanks. 

If a parishioner of your cult committed suicide, would you attend?  Would the cult even give them a memorial service?

[wiffleball 4,790]

One of the lasting lessons I learned from my brother's funeral is that you don't go to the funeral for the guy in the box. You go for the people who loved the guy in the box.

[Strike 5,539]

2 hours ago, weepaws said:

Couldn’t attend a funeral after someone selflessly took their own life.  Nope. 

Thanks. 

Maybe this was God's plan?  Who are you to question God? 

[Strike 5,539]

43 minutes ago, wiffleball said:

One of the lasting lessons I learned from my brother's funeral is that you don't go to the funeral for the guy in the box. You go for the people who loved the guy in the box.

 

<Wedding Crashers> Or for the grieving women </Wedding Crashers>

[Hawkeye21 2,399]

Just passed the 12 year anniversary of one of my best friends killing himself. Can’t believe it’s been that long already. 

[IGotWorms 4,058]

Putting all the political bullsh1t and all that aside, I don’t think you’re being very charitable here jerry.

Think how much pain you'd have to be in to do something like that. I don’t mean physical or literal pain of course, but emotional or mental. It’s unthinkable. How could your heart not go out a bit?

Or let’s say she was just an awful person and that’s why she did it. Seems like a stretch but whatever. Think of how terrible you’d have to be and how hard that would be. I mean we’re talking borderline personality disorder or the like. And that’s a really horrible life.

So anyway, have a little more sympathy for her, and understand the family is deeply hurting regardless, and the funeral is really for them.

[jerryskids 6,795]

2 hours ago, IGotWorms said:

Putting all the political bullsh1t and all that aside, I don’t think you’re being very charitable here jerry.

Think how much pain you'd have to be in to do something like that. I don’t mean physical or literal pain of course, but emotional or mental. It’s unthinkable. How could your heart not go out a bit?

Or let’s say she was just an awful person and that’s why she did it. Seems like a stretch but whatever. Think of how terrible you’d have to be and how hard that would be. I mean we’re talking borderline personality disorder or the like. And that’s a really horrible life.

So anyway, have a little more sympathy for her, and understand the family is deeply hurting regardless, and the funeral is really for them.

What did I say that was not charitable to her?

 

[IGotWorms 4,058]

25 minutes ago, jerryskids said:

What did I say that was not charitable to her?

 

The suggestion that maybe you wouldn’t ordinarily go to the funeral or that she was a horrible b1tch for abandoning her husband and son.

Which I actually get.

Just sayin, it’s a tragedy no matter what.

[jerryskids 6,795]

21 minutes ago, IGotWorms said:

The suggestion that maybe you wouldn’t ordinarily go to the funeral or that she was a horrible b1tch for abandoning her husband and son.

Which I actually get.

Just sayin, it’s a tragedy no matter what.

I said I didn't know her that well, but we always go to the funeral.

and I absolutely did not call her any disparaging names. I said you must be in a bad mental place to do that, especially on Mothers Day. 

Read my posts again. 

[IGotWorms 4,058]

26 minutes ago, jerryskids said:

I said I didn't know her that well, but we always go to the funeral.

and I absolutely did not call her any disparaging names. I said you must be in a bad mental place to do that, especially on Mothers Day. 

Read my posts again. 

Jerry, we know your judgments. You do not hide them well, or even at all 

[jerryskids 6,795]

9 hours ago, IGotWorms said:

Jerry, we know your judgments. You do not hide them well, or even at all 

I'm guessing you were drunk again.  Are you OK?  We're here to chat if you need help.   

If not, you once again used your lawyerly skills to sloppily skim a thread, read some words from some people, jumble them in your head, and draw a wrong conclusion.

Otherwise, feel free to point out where I said something to imply that she was a "raging biotch."  It's less than a page long, Worms, even you can do it.   

 

[supermike80 1,910]

16 hours ago, jerryskids said:

No, they were obnoxious.

They showed a montage of her pictures from birth until... maybe 3-5 years ago, based on the age of her son in the pics.  No recent ones, from when she had all of the face work done.  There was maybe one picture showing the new bewbs, but generally not.

What struck my wife and I was how many times different people mentioned her being "beautiful."  I know I'm playing psychologist on a low-rent FF message bored, but we both think she was chasing eternal youth with her recent surgeries, and Father Time always wins in the end.  I don't know if that is what led her to this tragic end, but perhaps she had too much of her image wrapped up in youthful beauty.

My advice is to tell the women/girls in your life that they are beautiful on the INSIDE.   

I tell your wife that in the morning

[GutterBoy 2,899]

20 minutes ago, jerryskids said:

I'm guessing you were drunk again.  Are you OK?  We're here to chat if you need help.   

If not, you once again used your lawyerly skills to sloppily skim a thread, read some words from some people, jumble them in your head, and draw a wrong conclusion.

Otherwise, feel free to point out where I said something to imply that she was a "raging biotch."  It's less than a page long, Worms, even you can do it.   

 

It's not a good look to mock a woman's looks who killed herself.  It's a message board so whatever but hopefully you didn't do this at the funeral.

[jerryskids 6,795]

4 minutes ago, GutterBoy said:

It's not a good look to mock a woman's looks who killed herself.  It's a message board so whatever but hopefully you didn't do this at the funeral.

I described her body image issues in the context of trying to figure out why she killed herself.  When such tragedies happen, people often try to figure out the reason.

But hey, thanks for thinking I might say this to people at the funeral. 

[EternalShinyAndChrome 4,101]

10 minutes ago, GutterBoy said:

It's not a good look to mock a woman's looks who killed herself.  It's a message board so whatever but hopefully you didn't do this at the funeral.

Yeah, f@ck you, moron.  You probably shouldn't be pointing fingers since you and your side cheered Ashly Babbit's death.  Your side of the aisle has ZERO restraint when "person who doesn't agree with our dogma" dies or gets assaulted.

Do us a favor and shut the f@ck up.

[IGotWorms 4,058]

22 hours ago, jerryskids said:

About to head to this.  Woman from our gym, in her 40s, a doctor.  She had body issues:  big fakies, lots of work done on her face.  We saw her the day before she killed herself at the gym, stretching on the side of class.  

The following day, Mother's Day, she killed herself.  She had a husband and an 11 year old son.  That poor kid is going to need therapy every year around Mother's Day.

You must be in a really bad mental place to do something so inconsiderate of the impact on those you love.   

We don't know her husband that well (nor did we know her that well), but we have a close-knit gym, and we subscribe to the "always go to the funeral" philosophy.

Very judgy, jer.

It’s a tragedy. Nobody gives a fock what you think about it.

It ain’t your family. It wasn’t your mom or your wife. Who knows what they’re going through but they don’t need your swooping in and offering criticisms.

Anyway hopefully you managed to keep it in at the funeral.

[Maximum Overkill 1,988]

22 hours ago, jerryskids said:

big fakies, lots of work done on her face.  We saw her the day before she killed herself at the gym, stretching on the side of class.  

Did you Doink her first? 

[GutterBoy 2,899]

24 minutes ago, jerryskids said:

I described her body image issues in the context of trying to figure out why she killed herself.  When such tragedies happen, people often try to figure out the reason.

But hey, thanks for thinking I might say this to people at the funeral. 

Well you've shown yourself to be rather shallow and consumed with looks.

Besides I'm sure whatever it was, it was much deeper than trying to look young or hot and failing.

[jerryskids 6,795]

2 minutes ago, IGotWorms said:

Very judgy, jer.

It’s a tragedy. Nobody gives a fock what you think about it.

It ain’t your family. It wasn’t your mom or your wife. Who knows what they’re going through but they don’t need your swooping in and offering criticisms.

Anyway hopefully you managed to keep it in at the funeral.

Again with the funeral.  You and Gutter must be projecting your inability to function in social situations.   

Nothing about "raging biotch" or even close, I see.  Color me shocked.

Regarding your bolded.

- The body image part was explained above to Gutter.  In a later post I discussed the danger of telling girls they are beautiful all the time.

- Killing yourself on Mother's Day is kinda relevant to the situation and makes it particularly tragic. Not judgy.

- I carefully worded "so inconsiderate" to avoid any judgment.  When a person kills themselves, they prioritize their death over the impact on the lives around them.  This is a fact, sad though it is.  

In typing my thread, I was doing more than say "someone died, so sad," but rather explore what would lead a mother to kill herself on Mother's Day.

[GutterBoy 2,899]

Just now, jerryskids said:

Again with the funeral.  You and Gutter must be projecting your inability to function in social situations.   

 

Nope.  I would never say this kinda stuff about someone while head d to their funeral, so pardon me for thinking that someone who would might also whisper the same under their breath to a buddy.

[jerryskids 6,795]

1 minute ago, GutterBoy said:

Well you've shown yourself to be rather shallow and consumed with looks.

Besides I'm sure whatever it was, it was much deeper than trying to look young or hot and failing.

Is that how I've shown myself?  

Also, I'm glad you're sure.