Your Inner Dialog?

[mmmmm...beer 691]

So ran into some anxiety/depression issues a few years back.  Apparently ptsd from seeing dead people in all aspects, people beat to a pulp, etc can wear on a guy after 20 years.  Anyway... I went through a bout of seeing someone to help that out.

During this time we started discussing different aspects of childhood and how I currently dealt with negativity etc.

She asked what my inner voice was like?  How did I Speak to myself if I failed something or how did I encourage myself?🫤

I was like... uhhh... well... it's mostly things like "You stupid motherfocker! Fock you are dumb!" "How the fock are you so dumb?" 

She was like WHAT?!!   You actually say those things? I response hesitantly... uhm yes... all the time.  My whole life.  Why? Is that not what it's supposed to be?

She said no... no that's not what it's supposed to be.  In fact thats really bad.

Oh....

 

 

 

[kilroy69 995]

14 minutes ago, mmmmm...beer said:

So ran into some anxiety/depression issues a few years back.  Apparently ptsd from seeing dead people in all aspects, people beat to a pulp, etc can wear on a guy after 20 years.  Anyway... I went through a bout of seeing someone to help that out.

During this time we started discussing different aspects of childhood and how I currently dealt with negativity etc.

She asked what my inner voice was like?  How did I Speak to myself if I failed something or how did I encourage myself?🫤

I was like... uhhh... well... it's mostly things like "You stupid motherfocker! Fock you are dumb!" "How the fock are you so dumb?" 

She was like WHAT?!!   You actually say those things? I response hesitantly... uhm yes... all the time.  My whole life.  Why? Is that not what it's supposed to be?

She said no... no that's not what it's supposed to be.  In fact thats really bad.

Oh....

 

 

 

I disagree. Who the fock only has a happy inner dialogue? I literally argue with myself all the time. Sometimes my inner dialogue makes sense. If I am disappointed in myself I will do the same as you. I also feel like a male therapist would know this is what men do. I highly recommend you find a therapist that better understands the male mind. Nothing is wrong with you in that aspect and do not let some dumb shrink make you think otherwise. 

[IGotWorms 3,317]

I think that’s probably fairly common from higher achieving types. It’s what drives you. Yeah, probably not very healthy, but it does get you there as long as it doesn’t overwhelm you.

[Engorgeous George 1,183]

My inner dialog is in Cantonese.  Unfortunately I do not speak Canonese so it is a bit confusing.  

[weepaws 2,461]

When sitting around and cursing at your self, stop and pray to the Lord, much better results. 

[Engorgeous George 1,183]

1 minute ago, weepaws said:

When sitting around and cursing at your self, stop and pray to the Lord, much better results. 

Which one or ones?

[t.j. booker 206]

After Gloria left I had some feelings of depression and physical, sexual, and financial inadequacy.

My therapist Ron told me to look in the mirror every morning and say, “T.J., you are good enough, smart enough, and gosh darnit - people like you!” Just repeating these words every morning helped keep the negative thoughts at bay and put me in a better headspace.  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Years later I caught Gloria blowing Ron in a Buffalo Wild Wings parking lot.  

[Mookz 1,287]

6 minutes ago, Engorgeous George said:

Which one or ones?

獨一的真主和救主

[IGotWorms 3,317]

3 minutes ago, t.j. booker said:

After Gloria left I had some feelings of depression and physical, sexual, and financial inadequacy.

My therapist Ron told me to look in the mirror every morning and say, “T.J., you are good enough, smart enough, and gosh darnit - people like you!” Just repeating these words every morning helped keep the negative thoughts at bay and put me in a better headspace.  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Years later I caught Gloria blowing Ron in a Buffalo Wild Wings parking lot.  

At least it wasn’t a Chotskie's

[Blue Horseshoe 348]

5 hours ago, weepaws said:

When sitting around and cursing at your self, stop and pray to the Lord, much better results. 

 

"So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

- Matthew 6:34

 

There are some that believe that praying and prayer is a form of active meditation. I'm not going to agree nor disagree with that, but often prayer in principle, from a physiological level, operates almost like deep breathing exercises. 

It's better to let go of things that we just can't control. That's obviously easier said than done. The major source of pain, IMHO, is when adults have obligations they don't want and are overwhelming. 

More to point, Darrell Green of the Redskins was one of the greatest cornerbacks to ever play in the NFL. And to play for 20 seasons is beyond incredible. He is often cited as saying he was not the most physically talented, but on a mental level, he learned to let the last play go. Good or bad, he let it wash away from him. Like water rolling off a duck's back. The power we have is not just in our choices, but in our reactions. 

There's value in finding your "center"  For some, that pathway is with God. With others, it's understanding there are things we can't control in life, but we always have a choice in how we react. What calms me  the most is I accept death completely. I have little time on this Earth, and that was true the day I was born, and with my failing health, even less time now. But I can't control that. I can control making today the best it can be under the circumstances. 

If you have an extra prayers to spare, sending a few my way would be much appreciated brother. While I accept my mortality, it's not like I want to find a speedway express towards it. Either way, I can't worry about it constantly. Be well, my friend, in all things. 

[5-Points 2,734]

Uh, yeah. What kind of phag has an inner voice that calmly reassures him after he focks up?

"Well, 5-Points, what do you feel you could've done differently in this situation that might have brought about a better outcome?"

Fock that! My inner dialog is more like this.. 

"What a focking idiot! How did you not see that? Pull your focking head outa yer ass, ya focking retard!"  

[wiffleball 4,646]

I wonder; Do stutterers stutter in their internal monologue?

[wiffleball 4,646]

CBT is largely a tactic to rewire your default thought like you described. 

[BunnysBastatrds 1,921]

 Great topic. I grew up with an alcoholic father. I was an only  child so I was his whipping boy. He almost never got violent with me. It was all mental abuse.  Said some of the same things that you were told.His were more telling me how I was never going to amount to anything. I should just quit school and get a job digging ditches. His father was an alcoholic that killed himself ater his wife died of cancer. Glad I never met him as he was brutal with my father. My therapist said he was using reverse psychology. It apparently worked, but it was rough. He quit drinking when I was eighteen. He said he was sorry and how proud he was of me. Last words he said to me. 
 So I have an inner voice and talk to myself all day and night. I just don’t answer myself.

 

 

[SUXBNME 1,340]

4 hours ago, 5-Points said:

Uh, yeah. What kind of phag has an inner voice that calmly reassures him after he focks up?

"Well, 5-Points, what do you feel you could've done differently in this situation that might have brought about a better outcome?"

Fock that! My inner dialog is more like this.. 

"What a focking idiot! How did you not see that? Pull your focking head outa yer ass, ya focking retard!"  

 

[Gepetto 988]

 

[Kopy 492]

When I'm at home. My Inner voice sings. " I feel pretty. Oh so pretty. I feel pretty and witty and gaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy. "

Work is another story. It's like a 12 round boxing match with Mike Tyson rattling around inside my knoggen.

 

[5-Points 2,734]

8 hours ago, SUXBNME said:

 

That song has to be considered a classic now. Which means I'm old.

 

[TheNewGirl 1,031]

23 hours ago, mmmmm...beer said:

So ran into some anxiety/depression issues a few years back.  Apparently ptsd from seeing dead people in all aspects, people beat to a pulp, etc can wear on a guy after 20 years.  Anyway... I went through a bout of seeing someone to help that out.

During this time we started discussing different aspects of childhood and how I currently dealt with negativity etc.

She asked what my inner voice was like?  How did I Speak to myself if I failed something or how did I encourage myself?🫤

I was like... uhhh... well... it's mostly things like "You stupid motherfocker! Fock you are dumb!" "How the fock are you so dumb?" 

She was like WHAT?!!   You actually say those things? I response hesitantly... uhm yes... all the time.  My whole life.  Why? Is that not what it's supposed to be?

She said no... no that's not what it's supposed to be.  In fact thats really bad.

Oh....

My inner dialog is like this as well. 

Stems from childhood and reactions from those around you (usually parents) when you needed help, didn't achieve something, etc. and how they reacted to you; the "not good enough" stuff. 

[GutterBoy 2,281]

My inner dialogue is that of a coach, meant to calm me down, focus, and overcome when faced with challenges.  I wasn't always like this, took years to develop, but it's definitely more productive than calling myself stupid, cursing at myself and a bunch of other awful things I used to say to myself.

It's worth your time to try and improve in this area.

[Voltaire 4,564]

Beating myself up usually consists of "Get off your ass, off the computer, and get this done.""

[IGotWorms 3,317]

 

[Hardcore troubadour 12,660]

I just let it build up inside of me until it becomes a little ball of hate then when I can’t take it anymore I throw an empty whiskey bottle at the ref.