Have you ever apologized to a GF from your past?

[TheNewGirl 1,422]

Odd question...

But hypothetically, but years after breaking up with someone and then reconnecting...have you apologized for what might've happened? And I mean, 15 or more years later. 

I am not talking about going out of your way to find her, or apologize, or whatever. But if you did that, then it counts. 

 

[supermike80 1,865]

Just now, TheNewGirl said:

Odd question...

But hypothetically, but years after breaking up with someone and then reconnecting...have you apologized for what might've happened? And I mean, 15 or more years later. 

I am not talking about going out of your way to find her, or apologize, or whatever. But if you did that, then it counts. 

 

I don't think so?  Interesting question.   I guess my "serious" GF's were always decent relationships, they just ended for whatever reason.  

But now you got me thinking through them to ask myself if I should for one thing or another. 

 

[iam90sbaby 2,529]

So your husband/bf hit up his ex and you’re pissed about it right?

[TheNewGirl 1,422]

16 minutes ago, iam90sbaby said:

So your husband/bf hit up his ex and you’re pissed about it right?

No, I actually had an old BF reach out to me and apologize. 

[jbycho 713]

2 minutes ago, TheNewGirl said:

No, I actually had an old BF reach out to me and apologize. 

That sounds like what an AA ex drunk would do in the 12 step program. 

The whole "reach out" part of it.

[jerryskids 6,654]

Just now, TheNewGirl said:

No, I actually had an old BF reach out to me and apologize. 

That's weird.  He's gotta know you are married, right?  Unless this is part of some therapy BS then I don't see what good could come of this.   

[supermike80 1,865]

2 minutes ago, jbycho said:

That sounds like what an AA ex drunk would do in the 12 step program. 

The whole "reach out" part of it.

That's what I kind of thought right from the get.   

[SUXBNME 1,466]

7 minutes ago, TheNewGirl said:

No, I actually had an old BF reach out to me and apologize. 

Jerryskids? 

 

eta: dammit...too late

 

[Hardcore troubadour 15,125]

Yes. When I had to tell them I was getting married and I was sorry I couldn’t bang them anymore. 

[Mike Honcho 5,230]

Yes.- 

Must have been 20+ years, but I found her on LinkedIn and apologized - didn't get a reply, didn't expect one nor really deserve one, but she deserved the apology. 

[MDC 7,223]

No, but I’ve wanted to. I haven’t because I assume they moved on so why bother them.

[jbycho 713]

1 minute ago, MDC said:

No, but I’ve wanted to. I haven’t because I assume they moved on so why bother them.

She didn't say "boyfriends". You might want to sit this one out. 

[MDC 7,223]

Just now, jbycho said:

She didn't say "boyfriends". You might want to sit this one out. 

BOYfriends!  

[BunnysBastatrds 2,366]

Thrice. My ex-wife., Cindy the crazy coon ass that looked like Angie Dickerson who when you laughed at during an argument, she would see red. Called her business and left a message in the middle of the night and of course buzzing. Janet The Planet,the galaxy girl. I was young and stoopid. Saw her at a bar twenty plus years later. Felt I needed to. 

[Engorgeous George 2,236]

I have pre-apologized to them for what I am going to do.

[Thornton Melon 617]

Just to tell her I'm sorry that her bulbous head would've stretched out the neck of my sweater. 

[Mike Honcho 5,230]

43 minutes ago, TheNewGirl said:

No, I actually had an old BF reach out to me and apologize. 

Chlamydia?

[TheNewGirl 1,422]

44 minutes ago, jerryskids said:

That's weird.  He's gotta know you are married, right?  Unless this is part of some therapy BS then I don't see what good could come of this.   

Yes.

This happened about two or three years ago. 

We'd worked together back in 97 or 98, and started dating. He was my first relationship after my abusive ex. He ended up REALLY leading me on in terms of what he wanted in a relationship, after we'd been pretty close. He got fired from that job in about 99 and then I never saw him again, never heard from him or anything. But, my heart was broken, he'd hurt me incredibly badly. He was one of those guys that really made me see the light about my abusive ex-boyfriend and how I deserved to be treated; only to have him turn around and break my heart. 

FF to about three years ago, he came back to the company I work for, was checking to see if anyone he worked with in 98 was still around, and there I was. Of course he knew I was married with kids. He reached out via email, asked how I was, etc. Then proceeded to apologize for everything that happened back then, and how truly sorry he was and that I didn't deserve anything that he'd done. 

That was it. Never went any further never reached out again, etc. 

If it were a part of a 12 Step program, then more power to him. Obviously, what happened between us was enough to last over 20 years of feelings on his part. He was also married, and had a couple of kids, one a daughter who was in her teens. So, it's also possible that having a daughter of his own, he realized the heart break that he caused. 

 

ETA: He wasn't reaching out to try and hook up, or anything like that. It was never an issue. And I told my husband about all of it. Mainly because of the courage it would have taken to do that after all this time. It was something that was weighing on him, that was clear. 

[purdygood 342]

1 hour ago, TheNewGirl said:

Odd question...

But hypothetically, but years after breaking up with someone and then reconnecting...have you apologized for what might've happened? And I mean, 15 or more years later. 

I am not talking about going out of your way to find her, or apologize, or whatever. But if you did that, then it counts. 

 

I was dating a girl. We were out and i told her "75% of people are just stupid."  She broke up with me over that because she was offended.  Over a year later she called me out of nowhere and was like "You we're wrong."   I was like what? She said "95% of people are stupid". Haven't talked to her since.  But soooo weird. I was nice but wanted to be like "B i was right!"

[Gladiators 1,965]

3 minutes ago, purdygood said:

I was dating a girl. We were out and i told her "75% of people are just stupid."  She broke up with me over that because she was offended.  Over a year later she called me out of nowhere and was like "You we're wrong."   I was like what? She said "95% of people are stupid". Haven't talked to her since.  But soooo weird. I was nice but wanted to be like "B i was right!"

She clearly fell into the stupid category.

[Fnord 2,135]

I never have. Though I probably owe apologies to most all of them.

27 minutes ago, Engorgeous George said:

I have pre-apologized to them for what I am going to do.

And this.

[Maximum Overkill 1,845]

13 minutes ago, Fnord said:

never have.

Because you've never had a girlfriend 

[frank 2,290]

Why would I? I said I didn’t want to ready any more posts full of nonsense or about that damn Miata and I meant it.

 

[Fnord 2,135]

1 hour ago, Maximum Overkill said:

Because you've never had a girlfriend 

I don't mind being insulted, just be funny. You're failing. Try harder please.

[jbycho 713]

1 hour ago, Maximum Overkill said:

Because you've never had a girlfriend 

 It's funny cause it's true. 

[TheNewGirl 1,422]

Some of you just cannot get by without insulting others. 

Sad. 

[avoiding injuries 1,545]

Yes. Not 15 years later, but a few years. 

[Maximum Overkill 1,845]

40 minutes ago, Fnord said:

I don't mind being insulted, just be funny. You're failing. Try harder please.

You're so sensitive. Calm down, we're Men. It's jokes. 

I thought you had me on ignore, that's what the Liberals normally do when triggered. 

[MDC 7,223]

43 minutes ago, Fnord said:

I don't mind being insulted, just be funny. You're failing. Try harder please.

Maxipad is occasionally funny, sometimes even when he’s trying to be. Peefoam/jbycho has never said a single entertaining or intelligent thing in his entire miserable existence.

Everybody hates Peefoam.  

[Maximum Overkill 1,845]

47 minutes ago, Fnord said:

I don't mind being insulted, just be funny. You're failing. Try harder please.

I'm hilarious and you know it. But I'll tell you what I tell everyone, if it's ever too much for you, PM me and I'll stop. 

Because I'm a Gentleman 

[jbycho 713]

5 minutes ago, MDC said:

Maxipad is occasionally funny, sometimes even when he’s trying to be. Peefoam/jbycho has never said a single entertaining or intelligent thing in his entire miserable existence.

Everybody hates Peefoam.  

All liberals seem to enjoy being peed on. 

[Maximum Overkill 1,845]

I apologized to my hot ex-wife.

I said "I'm so sorry that I ever married your stupid asss. You're lucky that you're hot because you're dumb as a rock and annoying as all hell. I should never of bought you those beautiful fake juggs and  Landrover. Don't call me ever again for money, call my Lawyer!". 

Does that count? 

[Mufaletta 75]

It worked out ok for Charlie:

 

[jerryskids 6,654]

3 hours ago, TheNewGirl said:

Yes.

This happened about two or three years ago. 

We'd worked together back in 97 or 98, and started dating. He was my first relationship after my abusive ex. He ended up REALLY leading me on in terms of what he wanted in a relationship, after we'd been pretty close. He got fired from that job in about 99 and then I never saw him again, never heard from him or anything. But, my heart was broken, he'd hurt me incredibly badly. He was one of those guys that really made me see the light about my abusive ex-boyfriend and how I deserved to be treated; only to have him turn around and break my heart. 

FF to about three years ago, he came back to the company I work for, was checking to see if anyone he worked with in 98 was still around, and there I was. Of course he knew I was married with kids. He reached out via email, asked how I was, etc. Then proceeded to apologize for everything that happened back then, and how truly sorry he was and that I didn't deserve anything that he'd done. 

That was it. Never went any further never reached out again, etc. 

If it were a part of a 12 Step program, then more power to him. Obviously, what happened between us was enough to last over 20 years of feelings on his part. He was also married, and had a couple of kids, one a daughter who was in her teens. So, it's also possible that having a daughter of his own, he realized the heart break that he caused. 

 

ETA: He wasn't reaching out to try and hook up, or anything like that. It was never an issue. And I told my husband about all of it. Mainly because of the courage it would have taken to do that after all this time. It was something that was weighing on him, that was clear. 

OK, that's a different situation.  If he basically ghosted you after getting fired (maybe he was embarrassed?), then saw you after returning to that company 25 years later... it might be MORE awkward if he didn't offer a little closure.   

My wife got ghosted before we started dating.  He worked at another company in our industry, they went on a few dates, and had planned to go somewhere outdoors (lake maybe?). He just never showed and never contacted her.  I couldn't imagine ever doing something like that to someone. Oh well, his loss was my gain.   

[Maximum Overkill 1,845]

1 minute ago, Mufaletta said:

It worked out ok for Charlie:

 

Not exactly,  he's now a meth head with fake teeth 

[WhiteWonder 2,707]

4 hours ago, TheNewGirl said:

No, I actually had an old BF reach out to me and apologize. 

This was the obvious answer

[WhiteWonder 2,707]

3 hours ago, TheNewGirl said:

Yes.

This happened about two or three years ago. 

We'd worked together back in 97 or 98, and started dating. He was my first relationship after my abusive ex. He ended up REALLY leading me on in terms of what he wanted in a relationship, after we'd been pretty close. He got fired from that job in about 99 and then I never saw him again, never heard from him or anything. But, my heart was broken, he'd hurt me incredibly badly. He was one of those guys that really made me see the light about my abusive ex-boyfriend and how I deserved to be treated; only to have him turn around and break my heart. 

FF to about three years ago, he came back to the company I work for, was checking to see if anyone he worked with in 98 was still around, and there I was. Of course he knew I was married with kids. He reached out via email, asked how I was, etc. Then proceeded to apologize for everything that happened back then, and how truly sorry he was and that I didn't deserve anything that he'd done. 

That was it. Never went any further never reached out again, etc. 

If it were a part of a 12 Step program, then more power to him. Obviously, what happened between us was enough to last over 20 years of feelings on his part. He was also married, and had a couple of kids, one a daughter who was in her teens. So, it's also possible that having a daughter of his own, he realized the heart break that he caused. 

 

ETA: He wasn't reaching out to try and hook up, or anything like that. It was never an issue. And I told my husband about all of it. Mainly because of the courage it would have taken to do that after all this time. It was something that was weighing on him, that was clear. 

doesn't sound like part of a 12 step program or anything. also doesn't honestly sound like it was weighing on him. If either of those were true, I think he would have made an attempt to reach out prior to rejoining your company. 

I'm sure he was feeling genuine remorse but addressing it with you seems more like a product of working for the same employer again. Maybe he thought you'd be running into each other in some work capacity? Or just seeing you still worked there and access to your work e-mail etc made it easy to reach out.

[WhiteWonder 2,707]

3 hours ago, purdygood said:

I was dating a girl

credibility ends here

[jerryskids 6,654]

4 hours ago, SUXBNME said:

Jerryskids? 

 

eta: dammit...too late

 

This should have been the obvious direction for me to go.   

 

[TimHauck 2,663]

26 minutes ago, WhiteWonder said:

doesn't sound like part of a 12 step program or anything. also doesn't honestly sound like it was weighing on him. If either of those were true, I think he would have made an attempt to reach out prior to rejoining your company. 

I'm sure he was feeling genuine remorse but addressing it with you seems more like a product of working for the same employer again. Maybe he thought you'd be running into each other in some work capacity? Or just seeing you still worked there and access to your work e-mail etc made it easy to reach out.

This