Anyone Own A Turtle ?

[BeenHereBefore 1,332]

In the past or now!

[Kopy 491]

[Hardcore troubadour 12,652]

Leave the turtles alone. Not everything is meant to be a pet. 

[TommyGavin 788]

I know someone who nursed healthily a baby turtle with broken shel to a humongous adult turtle size of a medium sized dog. 

[Mike Honcho 4,035]

Vincent Chase did...

[peenie 1,690]

My daughter found a baby turtle trying to cross a parking lot about 2 weeks ago. It was headed for a loading dock where trucks were surely going to smash it into a pancake.

We transported it to Lullwater Park. I put it near the edge of the water and it ran right in and started swimming like a pro. I will change my avatar so you can see him. We named him Prince Jason.

(I asked her to choose a name for him and she chose Jason. I said Jason was boring so she added Prince.)

[Djgb13 2,338]

Literally found a small baby turtle the other day on our back porch. Didn’t keep it but it was the first time we found one at our house 

[edjr 5,567]

My favorite kind of candy, with cashews. yuM!

[porkbutt 861]

i do. 10 of them to be exact

[fandandy 3,311]

I do not but years ago I stopped to carry a turtle across a relatively busy road and when I got home I started to think, maybe his buddy had called him from the ditch as he was crossing and as he turned I showed up.  

I may have cost that poor bastard like four hours of his life.

[fandandy 3,311]

Also, I love me some BHB.  Those who do not, suck it.  Seriously.  Or start paying Mike to post here.

[frank 2,145]

I like turtles. 

[fandandy 3,311]

6 minutes ago, frank said:

I like turtles. 

Would it hurt your feelings if I told you that I think turtles really hate you on a personal level?

I cannot say that I know this as I cannot communicate with turtles my gut tells me that turtles hate you.

[wiffleball 4,640]

I have a little turtle who rears his little head about 45 minutes after I eat nachos.

Sometimes he blows stinky little kisses.

 

[MDC 5,892]

7 hours ago, Djgb13 said:

Literally found a small baby turtle the other day on our back porch. Didn’t keep it but it was the first time we found one at our house 

How did a small baby turtle manage to climb onto your porch?  

[wiffleball 4,640]

One of them climbed into my soup at commander's Palace. He seemed pretty nervous, so I poured a little Sherry on him. He calmed right the hell down.

[BunnysBastatrds 1,918]

 

 

[Djgb13 2,338]

2 hours ago, MDC said:

How did a small baby turtle manage to climb onto your porch?  

Very carefully 

[fandandy 3,311]

2 hours ago, wiffleball said:

I have a little turtle who rears his little head about 45 minutes after I eat nachos.

Sometimes he blows stinky little kisses.

 

Does it kinda hurt when you shove his head back in the shell?

[fandandy 3,311]

15 minutes ago, Djgb13 said:

Very carefully 

This is another dood I like.

[Djgb13 2,338]

1 minute ago, fandandy said:

This is another dood I like.

What was he expecting? Me to go out there and ask the turtle how tf he got on my porch?  

[fandandy 3,311]

1 minute ago, Djgb13 said:

What was he expecting? Me to go out there and ask the turtle how tf he got on my porch?  

I just love the very carefully response.  

 

[Djgb13 2,338]

2 minutes ago, fandandy said:

I just love the very carefully response.  

 

I got that from my dad. He’s a smart ass like that himself  

[Big Guy 1,400]

4 hours ago, frank said:

I like turtles. 

my 1st thought as well

 

[Hardcore troubadour 12,652]

3 hours ago, MDC said:

How did a small baby turtle manage to climb onto your porch?  

It’s not like he said it flew to Dallas. 

[5-Points 2,729]

16 hours ago, BeenHereBefore said:

In the past or now!

You like turtles?

[5-Points 2,729]

4 hours ago, frank said:

I like turtles. 

 

6 minutes ago, Big Guy said:

my 1st thought as well

 

Dammit! 

[5-Points 2,729]

11 hours ago, TommyGavin said:

I know someone who nursed healthily a baby turtle with broken shel to a humongous adult turtle size of a medium sized dog. 

That's a tortoise not a turtle. 

[BeenHereBefore 1,332]

17 minutes ago, 5-Points said:

You like turtles?

I use to have two of them when I was a kid and feed them lettuce.

[TommyGavin 788]

17 minutes ago, 5-Points said:

That's a tortoise not a turtle. 

He called him Isaac the Turtle. So I assumed turtle. I didn’t question him 

[Djgb13 2,338]

25 minutes ago, Hardcore troubadour said:

It’s not like he said it flew to Dallas. 

 

[Gepetto 988]

When I was a kid we caught turtles all the time at the lake where I lived and I went to the Turtle races every year.  I've got trophies!  

[5-Points 2,729]

12 minutes ago, TommyGavin said:

He called him Isaac the Turtle. So I assumed turtle. I didn’t question him 

Tortoises get huge. They live to like 80 years. 

Turtles not so much. Snapping Turtles can get pretty big but not medium dog size big. 

[KSB2424 3,083]

I did as a kid.  Caught him near a pond.  Spike the turtle lived in a big arse aquarium.  I’d catch crickets and put them in the aquarium and just watch the slow carnage. 

[huskyhater75 242]

17 hours ago, BeenHereBefore said:

In the past or now!

RIGHT NOW-I've named them troubador and utilly. Both solid responders (unfortunately bitter most of the time for not being intelligent enough to post what I have-JEALOUSY) that ALWAYS have something negative to say...........they ARE turtles (that I OWN and "set traps" for them to make @$$eS of themselves-ALWAYS 100% DEPENDABLE for that) that ALWAYS slow down any intelligent conversation among us that actually KNOW FOOTBALL.......those two are just jealous little minions. My 2 frogs that I set up ALL the time for great laughs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[BeenHereBefore 1,332]

4 hours ago, KSB2424 said:

I did as a kid.  Caught him near a pond.  Spike the turtle lived in a big arse aquarium.  I’d catch crickets and put them in the aquarium and just watch the slow carnage. 

Caught the one on a creek and other was given to me later and they just loved lettuce. Later I had Chameleon lizards I feed crickets and mill worms too and watch the horror show.

[peenie 1,690]

You can now see Prince Jason in my profile picture. He was the size of a silver dollar. 

[wiffleball 4,640]

My grandmother gave me a turtle neck one year for christmas.

 

I don't know if I was more disappointed in the fact that it wasn't a sweater, or the fact that my grandmother is a sadistic f***.

 

Somewhere out there, there's a poor turtle who looks like Mike Alstott. 

[BunnysBastatrds 1,918]

 I pulled over once to avoid hitting one. 18 wheelers were behind me and knew he’d get smushed. I picked it up to throw back in the ditch, fawker pissed on me. I laughed.

[BiPolarBear 476]

I have had too many turtles to count. 

Two male Eastern Box Turtles I had would spot each other from far sides of the backyard, and charge each other at blindingly slow speeds. 

I waded out in a creek and caught a 12 pound common snapping turtle and kept him for years in a plastic 33 gallon garbage can. I had him out on the grass, washing the algae off his shell with a brush. He grabbed the brass end of the garden hose, and bit it completely flat in a split second.  The blue jays hated him, and would line up on the rim of his garbage can and scream at him. I would grab my single shot break-action pellet gun, and shot a jay in the back of the head. It would fall over in the water, and get completely eaten. 

I spotted an approximately 30 pound female common snapper about to fall off a dry lake spillway onto concrete. I ran over and saved her, and she was not grateful. I put her back in the lake.