Man "Ridicules" His Date After She Reveals Her Dream Of Being A Childfree Housewife

[WatsonRules 46]

2 minutes ago, kilroy69 said:

ok ok ok. Fine. not zero. 3.8 percent. 

 

 

Soooooo your saying there is a chance?

Nope, just saying there are childless couples out there where the wife (or husband) is unemployed and it works for them.

[TheNewGirl 1,347]

14 minutes ago, Cdub100 said:

It absolutely is a plus for most women. There is near zero risk for them to get married. At worst the come out even ( the vast majority of the time) and if there's kids involved women come out ahead 9 times out of 10. Sorry but there is no debate about this. 

I disagree. 

I have friends who've been married and gone through divorces. They came out single women on the other side without a place to live or in bankruptcy. The marriage brought them nothing really, other than children they have to split with a husband who doesn't pay for his kids. Seems risky to me. 

My BFF is gong through a divorce where they were married for 20 years. 3 kids, one is special needs. She quit her job at his request to stay home with their special needs child. through this, he kept promising she could go back to school, get her degree, so when she went back to work she'd be ready. Never happened. Meanwhile, he went to graduate school, owned his owned business, had a recording studio and was in a band as a hobby. He'd go out to gigs and she'd be home with the kids. 

Now, she filed for divorce. He literally threw her out, put stuff that he deemed as "hers" into storage and sent her the bill. She lives with her dad now with her kids. Took her a year to get him to pay child and spousal support and she still can't afford to find a place to live. She shares a room with her teenage daughter. 

Tell me how she came out ahead here. Please. 

[GobbleDog 984]

At least she knows doesn't want kids. Lots of people have kids because...  "always pictured myself having kids", "all my friends have kids", "everyone expects me to have kids", etc.  Many couples have them, but then don't do all the required hard work and end up doing a crappy job.

It's ok to not have kids. Before I married I told my wife "I'm fine with none or one, it's up to you."  She said "one please!" So we did.

[TheNewGirl 1,347]

1 hour ago, WatsonRules said:

Lots of judgement and projection going on for someone who was honest enough to state what she wanted, and despite the certainty of some here that it could never happen unless she was Giselle Bundchen level, there would be plenty of men who would be perfectly fine with the arrangement, especially if they are the type that doesn't know how to/want to cook, clean, do  laundry, etc. There are plenty of guys out there that don't want kids and want someone to take care of their needs exclusively. If someone is capable and wants to do that for them, more power to both of them.

Also, is this really the way that normal, non-wealthy people approach marriage? Worrying about what the other person might take that they don't deserve if they get divorced? 

Sad state of affairs.

 

 

Kind of how I feel too. 

 Although her requests and needs weren't the norm, I think it's great she brought it up on a first date. 

Regardless if they "got to know each other" this was her want from the beginning. Better to make that known than to get into a relationship thinking that either one could change the other. 

[kilroy69 1,216]

Just now, TheNewGirl said:

Kind of how I feel too. 

 Although her requests and needs weren't the norm, I think it's great she brought it up on a first date. 

Regardless if they "got to know each other" this was her want from the beginning. Better to make that known than to get into a relationship thinking that either one could change the other. 

Good for her that she brings this up right off the bat and does not lead them on. I can agree to that. If she brings that up right off the bat and the dude says yes then that is on him. 

[TheNewGirl 1,347]

1 minute ago, kilroy69 said:

Good for her that she brings this up right off the bat and does not lead them on. I can agree to that. If she brings that up right off the bat and the dude says yes then that is on him. 

Of course it is. That's why he'd need to want it too. 

[Strike 5,186]

Hey Booker, I think we found Gloria!!

[jerryskids 6,567]

4 minutes ago, Strike said:

Hey Booker, I think we found Gloria!!

 

[RogerDodger 797]

4 hours ago, kilroy69 said:

I can not imagine being OK with your significant other being a bum while you worked for the both of you. That type of situation is insane to me.  If she wanted to stay home with the kids I can very much understand that. Just wanting to stay home and have someone else support her is crazy. 

Brock Purdy just got engaged last month.  Meager NFL salary of $800,000 this year.  If they decide not to have kids you would expect his future wife to go get a job?  What about after 2 more years if he get's a big contract?

[Hardcore troubadour 14,934]

31 minutes ago, TheNewGirl said:

I disagree. 

I have friends who've been married and gone through divorces. They came out single women on the other side without a place to live or in bankruptcy. The marriage brought them nothing really, other than children they have to split with a husband who doesn't pay for his kids. Seems risky to me. 

My BFF is gong through a divorce where they were married for 20 years. 3 kids, one is special needs. She quit her job at his request to stay home with their special needs child. through this, he kept promising she could go back to school, get her degree, so when she went back to work she'd be ready. Never happened. Meanwhile, he went to graduate school, owned his owned business, had a recording studio and was in a band as a hobby. He'd go out to gigs and she'd be home with the kids. 

Now, she filed for divorce. He literally threw her out, put stuff that he deemed as "hers" into storage and sent her the bill. She lives with her dad now with her kids. Took her a year to get him to pay child and spousal support and she still can't afford to find a place to live. She shares a room with her teenage daughter. 

Tell me how she came out ahead here. Please. 

Sounds like someone here. 

[frank 2,276]

 

[Fireballer 2,639]

4 hours ago, TheNewGirl said:

 

I focking hate this so much. Unattractive women get nowhere in this society. 

They get a lot farther than unattractive men

[nobody 2,564]

Some men may prefer to have a stay-at-home wife no matter what.  I'd expect those guys want to control the woman, though, by keeping them reliant on them.

[IGotWorms 4,057]

3 hours ago, TheNewGirl said:

I disagree. 

I have friends who've been married and gone through divorces. They came out single women on the other side without a place to live or in bankruptcy. The marriage brought them nothing really, other than children they have to split with a husband who doesn't pay for his kids. Seems risky to me. 

My BFF is gong through a divorce where they were married for 20 years. 3 kids, one is special needs. She quit her job at his request to stay home with their special needs child. through this, he kept promising she could go back to school, get her degree, so when she went back to work she'd be ready. Never happened. Meanwhile, he went to graduate school, owned his owned business, had a recording studio and was in a band as a hobby. He'd go out to gigs and she'd be home with the kids. 

Now, she filed for divorce. He literally threw her out, put stuff that he deemed as "hers" into storage and sent her the bill. She lives with her dad now with her kids. Took her a year to get him to pay child and spousal support and she still can't afford to find a place to live. She shares a room with her teenage daughter. 

Tell me how she came out ahead here. Please. 

In no way, shape, or form is that how it’s supposed to turn out. Sounds to me like your friend screwed the pooch, big time

[Blue Horseshoe 348]

7 hours ago, TheNewGirl said:

So a woman would have to be hot in order for a man to want this too? 

There's no way an unattractive woman would find a man willing to work and have her stay home and take care of the home, cook all meals, clean house, do volunteer work, etc? 

I focking hate this so much. Unattractive women get nowhere in this society. 

 

Would you date a man who was 4'10? Marry a man who was 4'10? Have children with a man who is 4'10?

When you judge other people, particularly strangers, for their value system, that doesn't harm others ( we aren't talking about taking someone's right to vote nor buy property nor have access to basic services in modern society) , then you've immediately invalidated all your personal preferences too. 

Women trade on their looks. At multiple levels. A girl who is considered cute, but maybe not beautiful enough to be a "trophy wife", can still get things like attention, free lunch, gifts, etc, etc. 

So I'll amend your statement - "Unattractive women get nowhere in society considering the same small 5 percent subset of men that they nearly all want universally, if we are talking about the dating/marriage/having kids marketplace" 

You are right in that women in general are too harshly judged on their looks as a social currency. But it is a "currency". At some point in your life, it's likely someone, or multiple people, found you attractive and cut you a break, gave you something or you got some consideration for it, that would not have happened otherwise if you were someone else they didn't find attractive. 

So, to salve the wounds a bit here, this is a relative scale. For a woman who grew up in poverty, a guy with a simple job with the state with good medical and a pension looks like a massive lifestyle upgrade. And for that guy, she might be the prettiest girl he's been around and could get, even though she might not seen as attractive by most other men. 

The basis of the OP's post, which is an article, which is based on a Reddit post, so take that with a grain of salt. An anonymous person on Reddit says he laughed in someone's face. If it was all true, is that acceptable? No, it's rude. Manners cost you nothing. If you are on a date, then be a "gentleman" about it. If you aren't into her or her situation or her value system, be polite, show her a good time that evening, don't sleep with her, don't lead her on, take her home safely at the end of the night and create distance until you can stop talking period. 

Here is where this gets complex. The advent of common access to Internet and speed of information has allowed both men and women to talk about strategy and experiences, to the point where most men have realized saying "Everyone has it hard" is pointless. Women aren't listening. When a woman isn't getting exactly what she wants, odds are she's not listening. You can ask most of the guys here about that, and even the ones that don't like me would find it hard to argue there. So many men have just opted out. There is nothing more devastating for women as a whole that to just get no attention at all. And when that happens on a broad scale, it's devastating. 

No one is entitled to "negotiate" on the sexual marketplace at the same level. Most of the guys here could spend their lives trying hard forever and not get 1 percent of what Henry Cavill ignores on a daily basis. I disagree with you, there are plenty of men who would take care of an unattractive woman. In terms of "basics"  Or very thin to basics. A roof and food. Basic plumbing. It's just that the nearly all of those unattractive women would find those guys as losers or undesirable. 

Running a household, if it's done right, is NOT an easy job. Raising kids and running a household, if it's done right, is NOT an easy job. I suspect many of the cautionary tales about about SAHM or SAHW who are sh!t at doing their part, if at all. A lot of women can trade on their looks. The scale however shifts dramatically sometimes when it becomes an open negotiation. The "trade offs" become very personal for many of them. I.E. "If this is the best I could get in a man, what does that say about me?"  

But it's not all about the woman at all. "What's in it for me?" That's a question that several generations of men in the Western world have asked themselves. When the juice wasn't worth the squeeze, many just walked out. Some hung around, but only for sex. So it's not just unattractive women anymore, but of course, they will take the brunt of it. 

You aren't entitled to the "negotiation" that you want. However, as a point of empathy, I recognize this is a very painful and complex issue for most women, and tragically, especially for young girls who face immense pressure about looks, fitting in and body image concerns. I believe many men, in a detached sense, can have empathy for someone who is struggling with these kind of issues, but they just don't want to hear it, there's nothing in it for them, so they silently walk away. What is often being left unsaid that women only truly care about the attention from men they desire, the large cross section of men who can do nothing for them don't even exist. Once the wool was pulled away from the eyes of the masses, the end result was always predictable. 

Third Wave Feminism screwed you hard. Screwed all women hard. Particularly screwed women with little negotiating leverage very hard. The only people who seem to be winning in all this is cat food companies. Because no one wants to marry an American woman anymore. They'll have to clip their cat food coupons in silence. Men were told en masses to get out of the way. So they did. Funny how that works. 

[zsasz 361]

17 hours ago, kilroy69 said:

I just can not imagine wanting to be with that type of person. To me a person who wants to stay at home all day and have someone else take care of them is not a grown up. 

In my original post, I'd imagine the lady I've laid forth is not seeing it as "someone else taking care of them"....but is seeing herself as being the woman behind the man; she provides what he needs to take care of her. I don't see anything wrong with that. 

Admittedly, my depiction is an idealistic view; so I'd imagine that this woman is more in line with the idea of "I'm looking for someone to provide for me, while I find myself"......and that's a much murkier pool to swim in; more in line with her not being a grown up.  

[League Champion 1,896]

NOBODY WANTS A BROKE ASS UGLY MAN OR WOMAN. SORRY TO BREAK IT TO EVERYONE. 

[listen2me 23 1,825]

10 hours ago, nobody said:

Some men may prefer to have a stay-at-home wife no matter what.  I'd expect those guys want to control the woman, though, by keeping them reliant on them.

I agree with this.  I have seen that.    

 

[Engorgeous George 2,131]

My wife worked until we had our first child.  Sdtay at home ever since, even once the children were grown.  Lots to do at home when raising children.  Not so sure if no kids, but to each their own.  This woman was up front about her hoipes and dreams.  I respect that.

[League Champion 1,896]

13 minutes ago, listen2me 23 said:

I agree with this.  I have seen that.    

 

What if that's what she wants and you can afford it? 

What's the issue? 

[Hardcore troubadour 14,934]

Here’s the reality of the situation:  No matter what the dynamics of the relationship are, who makes more, who works etc, if the family falls into financial ruin, it’s the man’s responsibility and he will receive the blame if it does. Even if no one says it.  

[listen2me 23 1,825]

5 minutes ago, League Champion said:

What if that's what she wants and you can afford it? 

What's the issue? 

No real issue.  Id hope she would do more than push a vacuum around all day however.  Don't become one of those weird homebodies.

My best friend's mom stayed home since the time I knew him growing up.  Yeah she made meals and cleaned.  She also sat there and guzzled vodka and pills.  As she aged she became a bit coo coo.  

[League Champion 1,896]

5 minutes ago, listen2me 23 said:

No real issue.  Id hope she would do more than push a vacuum around all day however.  Don't become one of those weird homebodies.

It's not 1950

[IGotWorms 4,057]

1 hour ago, Engorgeous George said:

My wife worked until we had our first child.  Sdtay at home ever since, even once the children were grown.  Lots to do at home when raising children.  Not so sure if no kids, but to each their own.  This woman was up front about her hoipes and dreams.  I respect that.

Not the same situation at all. There is a trade off there. You work and she cares for the children and family. She raised the kids and was there for them. It also saved you money in terms or childcare and probably helped in other areas too like more economical food preparation and so forth.

What the girl in the OP wants is to do nothing and have someone else pay for it. She is a freeloader.

[League Champion 1,896]

That's what maids are for. If you got money and she doesn't need to work, then so what? Why should she?

These replies are coming from fat ass broke guys. Of course you have a problem with it. 

[jerryskids 6,567]

The Catholic Church does a few things right during the engagement process; one of them is to take a survey rating the importance of various things on a 1-7 (IIRC) scale.  Having kids, saving money, sex, going to church, staying at home, etc.  Each person takes it then the results are compared.  There are no "right" answers (although I presume they hope for high scores on the church part!), but the important thing is that the results correlate.  Relationships where both want kids, or neither want kids, are more likely to succeed; ones were they differ are more likely to fail.  And so on.

So hey, if she finds a guy who's buying what she's selling, good for her.  My point was not that such guys don't exist, but that her intentions were misleading and that most guys would presume her desire to stay home involved raising kids.

[GutterBoy 2,898]

1 hour ago, listen2me 23 said:

No real issue.  Id hope she would do more than push a vacuum around all day however.  Don't become one of those weird homebodies.

My best friend's mom stayed home since the time I knew him growing up.  Yeah she made meals and cleaned.  She also sat there and guzzled vodka and pills.  As she aged she became a bit coo coo.  

Do you think working 9 to 5 at the Piggly Wiggly would have saved her?

[TBayXXXVII 2,483]

20 hours ago, Baker Boy said:

Yes, beauty bias is the most prevalent discrimination in our society. Yet no one will talk about it. 
 

The market size of the plastic surgeon industry is estimated to reach USD 27.1 billion by the end of the year 2023, which is 1.98% more than in 2022.

I'm willing to bet that the bulk of that is boob jobs for porn stars and celebrities not wanting to look their age.  Also the trans community.

[League Champion 1,896]

14 minutes ago, GutterBoy said:

Do you think working 9 to 5 at the Piggly Wiggly would have saved her?

I'm confused as to what he's saying. Is it more sexist to "make her work" or to LET her stay home if that's what she wants??

I'm lost here. I'm giving my Wife what she wants, not what I want. 

 

[TheNewGirl 1,347]

2 hours ago, League Champion said:

It's not 1950

Right? We have Roomba's now, no need to push around the vacuum. 

[League Champion 1,896]

Just now, TheNewGirl said:

Right? We have Roomba's now, no need to push around the vacuum. 

Damn right!! Self cleaning ovens and kids to do the rest 

[listen2me 23 1,825]

Just now, League Champion said:

I'm confused as to what he's saying. Is it more sexist to "make her work" or to LET her stay home if that's what she wants??

I'm lost here. I'm giving my Wife what she wants, not what I want. 

 

Not sure what you are babbling about.  Im not suggesting making anyone do anything.  

[listen2me 23 1,825]

Just now, TheNewGirl said:

Right? We have Roomba's now, no need to push around the vacuum. 

And hire a cleaning service.

So it is down to the bon bons for stay at home women.  Oh I forgot "volunteer" at meals on wheels.  

[GutterBoy 2,898]

5 minutes ago, listen2me 23 said:

And hire a cleaning service.

So it is down to the bon bons for stay at home women.  Oh I forgot "volunteer" at meals on wheels.  

What the fock is a bon bon?

[seafoam1 2,802]

9 minutes ago, GutterBoy said:

What the fock is a bon bon?

? Are you stupid or just pretending to be?

a candy with chocolate or fondant coating and fondant center that sometimes contains fruits and nuts

[TimHauck 2,619]

32 minutes ago, TheNewGirl said:

Right? We have Roomba's now, no need to push around the vacuum. 

You must have watched the Steven Crowder episode that @RaiderHaters Revenge linked.  Paraphrasing, he said something like women are the unhappiest they’ve ever been and are also doing the least amount of household work, so implied the 2 were related.  Bold move for the guy caught on video verbally abusing his wife and most likely doesn’t allow her to own a car.

[TimHauck 2,619]

14 hours ago, nobody said:

Some men may prefer to have a stay-at-home wife no matter what.  I'd expect those guys want to control the woman, though, by keeping them reliant on them.

Yup and I’m sure would have a prenup.

[Hardcore troubadour 14,934]

23 hours ago, GutterBoy said:

My wife quit her job when she got pregnant with her first.  Went back to work as a teacher when they got older, did that off and on for a few years.  She's not working now as everything is MUCH easier when she is around to run the house.  We talk about her maybe going back when my son goes off to college, but at this point I dont know that we'll need the money.  I guess it depends on where he goes.

All things considered, it would be great if she didn't have to work anymore, even after the kids are out of the house.

Yet you have a housekeeper. Too funny. Cuck. 

[League Champion 1,896]

1 hour ago, GutterBoy said:

What the fock is a bon bon?

Fat chicks sit on the couch watching Anderson Cooper, eating Bon Bons all day. 

[jerryskids 6,567]

2 hours ago, League Champion said:

I'm confused as to what he's saying. Is it more sexist to "make her work" or to LET her stay home if that's what she wants??

I'm lost here. I'm giving my Wife what she wants, not what I want. 

 

You have kids, right?  If so you are arguing with yourself; nobody is saying a person shouldn't stay home to raise the kids.  And if as you age you've got the financial means for her to stay at home, fine.

It's going into it with the "no kids and I'm staying home" mindset.  You might be lucky and catch a unicorn that is a great cook, cleans, has wild sex with you daily, encourages you to have the boys over to watch the game... but most likely we're dealing with a selfish, narcissistic woman.