Cloaca du jour 2,066 Posted June 4, 2017 retired triple crown racehorse. Sit in my pasteur while truck after truck of hotties comes for the sexors!!!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
fandandy 3,311 Posted June 4, 2017 I'd choose one of those red bottomed baboons, I think. The ones who climb through the trees all day and mount any and every female they come across. She's bent over looking for berries, BAM! Picking the ticks off her kids fur, BAM! Dude don't care, he just mounts her and goes to town, then walks away like nothing happened. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SUXBNME 1,340 Posted June 4, 2017 A Honeybadger. They're like badass and stuff Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
avoiding injuries 1,225 Posted June 4, 2017 My dog. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Fireballer 2,391 Posted June 4, 2017 Fockin Bald Eagle...any other responses are ghey Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
frank 2,152 Posted June 4, 2017 Or would you rather be a fish? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
frank 2,152 Posted June 4, 2017 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F0INZXQ_yns&sns=em Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
frank 2,152 Posted June 4, 2017 Is a hippopotamus a hippopotamus or just a really cool oppotamus? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
porkbutt 864 Posted June 4, 2017 anything but a muslim 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shotsup 832 Posted June 4, 2017 A Honeybadger. They're like badass and stuff Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Voltaire 4,567 Posted June 4, 2017 Godzilla might be fun. I could go on tour of North Korea and check out all the hot anorexic chicks. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Filthy Fernadez 2,696 Posted June 4, 2017 A Killer whale. Apex predator that's smart as hell. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
penultimatestraw 473 Posted June 4, 2017 A lobster. Because lobsters live for over one hundred years, are blue-blooded like aristocrats, and stay fertile all their lives. I also like the sea very much. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Filthy Fernadez 2,696 Posted June 4, 2017 A lobster. Because lobsters live for over one hundred years, are blue-blooded like aristocrats, and stay fertile all their lives. I also like the sea very much. They get boiled alive too. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
penultimatestraw 473 Posted June 4, 2017 They get boiled alive too. Ok, maybe a water bear (tardigrade) instead: Tardigrades are one of the most resilient animals known: they can survive extreme conditions that would be rapidly fatal to nearly all other known life forms. They can withstand temperature ranges from 1 K (−458 °F; −272 °C) (close to absolute zero) to about 420 K (300 °F; 150 °C)[10] for several minutes, pressures about six times greater than those found in the deepest ocean trenches, ionizing radiation at doses hundreds of times higher than the lethal dose for a human, and the vacuum of outer space.[11] They can go without food or water for more than 30 years, drying out to the point where they are 3% or less water, only to rehydrate, forage, and reproduce.[3][12][13][14] Tardigrades are one of the few species to have survived the five mass extinctions that Earth has faced Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Filthy Fernadez 2,696 Posted June 4, 2017 Good choice. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
joneo 529 Posted June 4, 2017 I'd be a Tiger...and fock all sorts of white wimmin. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mr. Hand 482 Posted June 4, 2017 There is a great movie that touches on this. It's called The Lobster. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Djgb13 2,338 Posted June 4, 2017 Surprised no one has said a lion. All they do is eat, sleep, and fock. Hell he doesn't even have to fetch his own food. The females do all the work Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
joneo 529 Posted June 4, 2017 Surprised no one has said a lion. All they do is eat, sleep, and fock. Hell he doesn't even have to fetch his own food. The females do all the work It's good to be King Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Frozenbeernuts 1,652 Posted June 4, 2017 Surprised no one has said a lion. All they do is eat, sleep, and fock. Hell he doesn't even have to fetch his own food. The females do all the work The males live a rough life. They basically have to go fight off an older male from a pride. They dominate for two years, fight constantly defending their pride from other males, and then eventually they get beat. Sometimes they get their genitals eaten off. For two years it's great, then that's it. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Frozenbeernuts 1,652 Posted June 4, 2017 Probably a Manbearpig Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bier Meister 1,517 Posted June 4, 2017 Siberian Tiger- i prefer colder climates Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Frozenbeernuts 1,652 Posted June 4, 2017 Tiger Yeah I think I'd rather be a tiger than a lion Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
fandandy 3,311 Posted June 4, 2017 Animals that if reincarnated as, you would know you truly focked up the last go round: Cow in the USA. Female goat with a nice ass in any mooslim country. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
penultimatestraw 473 Posted June 4, 2017 There is a great movie that touches on this. It's called The Lobster.Sounds familiar Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
penultimatestraw 473 Posted June 4, 2017 The males live a rough life. They basically have to go fight off an older male from a pride. They dominate for two years, fight constantly defending their pride from other males, and then eventually they get beat. Sometimes they get their genitals eaten off. For two years it's great, then that's it.Kinda like the geek club, except the great part. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
frank 2,152 Posted June 4, 2017 Mastadon. Deserves its own thread. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
tanatastic 2,061 Posted June 4, 2017 A gerbil used for male anal pleasures. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wiffleball 4,649 Posted June 4, 2017 this guy at the 20 second mark. because, obviously. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Djgb13 2,338 Posted June 4, 2017 The males live a rough life. They basically have to go fight off an older male from a pride. They dominate for two years, fight constantly defending their pride from other males, and then eventually they get beat. Sometimes they get their genitals eaten off. For two years it's great, then that's it. I didn't realize fighting was a downside? Gotta have some fun and some good ol fisticuffs is the way to do it Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BunnysBastatrds 1,926 Posted June 4, 2017 A dragon fly. One of the most beautiful creatures on earth. Second would be your moms beaver. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Frozenbeernuts 1,652 Posted June 4, 2017 I didn't realize fighting was a downside? Gotta have some fun and some good ol fisticuffs is the way to do it No the fighting isn't the bad part, it's when the king is dethroned after two years and is lucky to walk away with his genitals in tact Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Frozenbeernuts 1,652 Posted June 4, 2017 A dragon fly. One of the most beautiful creatures on earth. Second would be your moms beaver. Sooo... you would be getting hammered by schlong constantly? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites