I need to get out of an Engagement Party...

[TBayXXXVII 2,117]

Anyone have success with this?

Little background: My best friend (Brian), has a cousin who lives in Georgia and is coming up for the month of November.  In the past, a bunch of us (10), have tried to get together once a year to have a big poker game night, including my friends cousin.  This is the first time since COVID, that all 10 us are going to be around, but the only date would be Saturday, November 5th.  We planned this back in July.

Fast forward to now... whether any of you remember or not, my girlfriend is an amateur body builder and all of her contracts ended in June, the 30th to be exact.  The quirk of it was that while her contracts and whatnot ended in June, she has bookings through the end of the calendar year.  Anyway, I told her that I know she'll have a lot going on and some things she'll want me either there or around for, but do not plan anything for November 5th.  On Saturday, she left a note on the table in kitchen for me when I got home (brought my nephew to his last baseball game of the fall season).  The note said, "Don't forget, we have the engagement party on Saturday (11/5), at 4 pm.  Be ready by 3 and I'll come by and pick you up."

So, I got pretty ticked off because... 1) I told her not to make any plans for me and 2) This is the first time I've ever heard about the engagement party.  I brought it up to her yesterday when she got back and I told her that I was going and told her that she must have forgotten about my plans.  She gives me one of those "looks", the one where I'm the only idiot in room.  I'm sure you guys have gotten this before as well.  The thing is, I usually have about a 30% success rate of getting out of these things, even when I get "the look".  The problem is, everything I tried was losing.  Her biggest argument was, "this is very important and WE clearly, have to be there".  When I asked why, is when I get "the look".  I lose every time we get to that.  So, any of you have ideas of how to get out of this?

[iam90sbaby 2,125]

Covid

[IGotWorms 3,315]

Fock the bride to be

[craftsman 1,045]

Just now, IGotWorms said:

Fock the bride to be

What if she looks like the late Louis Anderson? Or worse, Kathy Bates? 

[IGotWorms 3,315]

Just now, craftsman said:

What if she looks like the late Louis Anderson? Or worse, Kathy Bates? 

Worth it for poker night, no?

[craftsman 1,045]

8 minutes ago, IGotWorms said:

Worth it for poker night, no?

I don't know. 

[nobody 2,044]

Just tell her you're not going.  I don't understand why this is an issue.

[BunnysBastatrds 1,920]

 Easyily. I used it twice this weekend and no one questioned my reason. Only concern for my well being.1- Lunch with my new wifeys two sons and her. They don’t know or like me to much. I don’t blame them as I’m their Moms new man. 2- Taking a two plus hours drive to just hang out with her  sisters and female family members.

 On Thursday I got a flu shot, only my second one ever. I started feeling a bit achy and tired all day Friday, touch of fever. Felt a little bit better on Saturday and could have easily gone, but I wouldn’t have been myself. Felt much better on Sunday but wanted to watch the Saints game and told her I need one more day to recoup. She didn’t think twice. “I’ll bring some good food for dinner, I love you.”

 Get, or say you stopped and got your flu shot the day before this event. Wake up the day and tell whoever you feel like fawking shiot and there is no way you can make it.  
 

Done!!!

[craftsman 1,045]

If you both have something going on of equal importance to you both as individuals, I don't understand why she thinks hers is more important. 

[fandandy 3,311]

I think his point is that she is a bodybuilder and can whoop his ass.  He needs a solution where she is not angry.

[IGotWorms 3,315]

4 minutes ago, fandandy said:

I think his point is that she is a bodybuilder and can whoop his ass.  He needs a solution where she is not angry.

Maybe don’t date Mongo?

[fandandy 3,311]

2 minutes ago, IGotWorms said:

Maybe don’t date Mongo?

Dood ain't gonna be playing poker anytime soon, I'll tell you that much.

[Voltaire 4,562]

Bunny with the solid advice. 

You need a doctor's appointment. Flu shot, horrible nausea, something

[fandandy 3,311]

If it starts at 4 pm, why can't you go to both?  Stay til like 6:30 then go play poker.

[frank 2,145]

49 minutes ago, craftsman said:

If you both have something going on of equal importance to you both as individuals, I don't understand why she thinks hers is more important. 

Are you new to Earth or something?

 

[Gladiators 1,904]

Tldr

[OldMaid 1,838]

Strip down to your underwear and attack her with a hammer. 

 

[craftsman 1,045]

21 minutes ago, frank said:

Are you new to Earth or something?

 

My girlfriend and I are pretty chill with these scenarios. For instance, she has a long time close friend that moved to Turkey and she's been there a couple times to visit, and always asks me if I want to go along with her. And she would really like it But I've met her girlfriend a few times before and I just tell her, you know I wouldn't enjoy hanging out with both of you everyday all day for a week. Just like you wouldn't enjoy coming along when I fly out to meet up with friends for Frisbee golf for a few days. And she says, "I get it. Sybel (her friend) would drive you crazy".  Girl talk for a week? No thanks. 

We are even good with movies. We don't expect each other to like each other's movies. So when we want to watch something together, we have enough overlapping likes that we can find something easily.  

[nobody 2,044]

1 hour ago, Voltaire said:

Bunny with the solid advice. 

You need a doctor's appointment. Flu shot, horrible nausea, something

That's terrible advice.  First off lying isn't the answer.  Just say you're not going, but how is he supposed to explain that he couldn't go to the engagement party, but could go to his thing.

This is why you don't even bother lying.  His girlfriend wants a date to the party.  She doesn't want to show up alone.  Tell her to bring a friend.

[Shooter McGavin 589]

Just break up with her now and save yourself trouble later.  She's not worth it.

[Shooter McGavin 589]

Also gf body builder?  Yikes.  Is her d bigger than yours?

[Voltaire 4,562]

7 minutes ago, nobody said:

That's terrible advice.  First off lying isn't the answer.  Just say you're not going, but how is he supposed to explain that he couldn't go to the engagement party, but could go to his thing.

This is why you don't even bother lying.  His girlfriend wants a date to the party.  She doesn't want to show up alone.  Tell her to bring a friend.

OK maybe this is better. But if you want the coward's way out, Bunny has it.

[nobody 2,044]

This is where dude's always get themselves in trouble.  They feel they need to keep a chick happy.  When you set that precedent, you'll be bending over backwards keeping a chick happy the whole relationship.

[shorepatrol 1,737]

Sh!t in your sock and send it with your rsvp. You'll be uninvited 

[TBayXXXVII 2,117]

The engagement party is about 45 minutes away, but poker night is 2 hours away... in the other direction.  IF we leave at 7 (which I doubt), I wouldn't get to poker night until around 10 pm.  The plan was even to have my friend pick me up at 11 am and get there around 1.  Make a full day of it.

I have no idea who the engagement party is for.  I didn't even know about it until Saturday.

Lying won't work because she knows what my alternate plans are.  Faking being sick won't work because we live together.

Telling her that I won't go, won't cut it because she's cancelled her plans in the past for me, when things came up.

I just need a good logical argument.

[Voltaire 4,562]

Just now, Shooter McGavin said:

Also gf body builder?  Yikes.  Is her d bigger than yours?

We've known this for a while. It came up during the string of shotsup's popular "rank 'em" threads that everyone loved but that Mike despises for some reason.

Body building women really care about what they look like. Even though its a turn-off for most guys, it's a turn-on for TBay, and its good that guys like him are out there, those women deserve love and happiness too. Other than this outlier thread, they've been happy together for years now.

[TBayXXXVII 2,117]

13 minutes ago, Shooter McGavin said:

Just break up with her now and save yourself trouble later.  She's not worth it.

Can't, she makes and has made a lot more money than me, plus I'm still a bit in debt.  She's the cash cow.  LOL

9 minutes ago, Shooter McGavin said:

Also gf body builder?  Yikes.  Is her d bigger than yours?

Nah, I'm bigger by a couple inches.

[fandandy 3,311]

5 minutes ago, TBayXXXVII said:

I just need a good logical argument.

I think the logical argument is your OP.

[Voltaire 4,562]

1 minute ago, TBayXXXVII said:

The engagement party is about 45 minutes away, but poker night is 2 hours away... in the other direction.  IF we leave at 7 (which I doubt), I wouldn't get to poker night until around 10 pm.  The plan was even to have my friend pick me up at 11 am and get there around 1.  Make a full day of it.

I have no idea who the engagement party is for.  I didn't even know about it until Saturday.

Lying won't work because she knows what my alternate plans are.  Faking being sick won't work because we live together.

Telling her that I won't go, won't cut it because she's cancelled her plans in the past for me, when things came up.

I just need a good logical argument.

All kidding aside, if you go through with this, after she's cancelled plans in the past for you, it'll hurt her and jeopardize your relationship.

The only way to do it is to say, "I've had these plans since July and told you about it then. I only see these people once a year and this'll be the first time in three years to see them at all. Meanwhile, this engagement party consists of your friend, I don't know the couple or anybody there and nobody there will miss me. You're being unreasonable and selfish."

[BunnysBastatrds 1,920]

20 minutes ago, Voltaire said:

OK maybe this is better. But if you want the coward's way out, Bunny has it.

Coward? Hmmm!!! Pick your battles. They use drama, we use thought. And I like poosay. Phag

[Hardcore troubadour 12,656]

Enagement party? So tacky. Fock that. Tell her friends are important too. Would she rather be with a guy with none, like MDC? Ask her what she would think of you when you met and you said you didn’t have any friends  you like to spend time with. She would have thought you were a loser/ weirdo. Well, keeping friends means you have to  hang out with them sometimes. She said “we have to go to this party”. No honey, you have to go.  

[Brad GLuckman 518]

Am I not understanding this?

You had plans for months. Go hang out with your friends. She's being completely selfish to expect you to abandon your plans for hers. 

[porkbutt 861]

engagement party is third only behind a "reveal party" or a coed baby shower. neither of which you'd catch me at while im breathing. is any semblance of manlihood dead????? im not even saying you should go with friends....but at least say fock off to that made up shitfest.

[Pimpadeaux 2,270]

3 hours ago, OldMaid said:

Strip down to your underwear and attack her with a hammer. 

 

[Gepetto 988]

Engagement party?  Whoopity doo dah.

[JustinCharge 2,397]

6 hours ago, craftsman said:

What if she looks like the late Louis Anderson? Or worse, Kathy Bates? 

oddly enough, im watching misery tonight for halloween.

[Bill E. 666]

3 hours ago, TBayXXXVII said:

The engagement party is about 45 minutes away, but poker night is 2 hours away... in the other direction.  IF we leave at 7 (which I doubt), I wouldn't get to poker night until around 10 pm.  The plan was even to have my friend pick me up at 11 am and get there around 1.  Make a full day of it.

I have no idea who the engagement party is for.  I didn't even know about it until Saturday.

Lying won't work because she knows what my alternate plans are.  Faking being sick won't work because we live together.

Telling her that I won't go, won't cut it because she's cancelled her plans in the past for me, when things came up.

I just need a good logical argument.

Can you say it is a $500 tournament buy in and you are committed to paying the entry fee whether you go or not?    Say there is big money on the line and you could win a few thousand if you do well or be out $500 if you do not go.

[Pimpadeaux 2,270]

27 minutes ago, JustinCharge said:

oddly enough, im watching misery tonight for halloween.

Not so oddly enough, you live misery 365 days a year, as do all of those around you. 

[nobody 2,044]

40 minutes ago, Bill E. said:

Can you say it is a $500 tournament buy in and you are committed to paying the entry fee whether you go or not?    Say there is big money on the line and you could win a few thousand if you do well or be out $500 if you do not go.

That'll go well for the dude in debt.  I never knew so many people just defaulted to lying.

Public service announcement: Start your relationship by telling the truth and maintain it throughout.  You guys seem to fall into this trap of lying to keep a girl happy.  But telling the truth is the ultimate get out of jail free card.  And here's the best part.  If you just tell the truth about what you like and don't like, she'll be the one lying to you saying she's cool with what you want.  You'll be shocked.

I guess the real problem here is TBay appears to be whipped.  

[craftsman 1,045]

1 hour ago, Pimpadeaux said:

Not so oddly enough, you live misery 365 days a year, as do all of those around you. 

Oh boy. Another Rusty zinger. You never fail to disappoint.